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Wrong Place, Wrong Time, Wrong Clark TOC can be found Here Okay, if this part doesn't garner any comments, I've clearly lost all my readers. Just joking. In case you're wondering, the dress looks like a hot pink version of this: Hold the accessories. (The song came out in Nov. 1984, close enough for Clark to have Lana prom fantasies about it.) Please throw all your tomatoes (and/or comments) here. I'm getting low on sauce again. Thanks for reading.
Last edited by VirginiaR; 04/27/14 05:19 PM. Reason: Changed to FDK marker
VirginiaR. "On the long road, take small steps." -- Jor-el, "The Foundling" --- "clearly there is a lack of understanding between those two... he speaks Lunkheadanian and she Stubbornanian" -- chelo.
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Top Banana
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Oh my goodness. What a fantastic part. So many good bits but my Favourite... He smiled as he thought about how, after dumping her trash on a non-pizza-ordering Tuesday, Lois had then proceeded to her roof, spread her arms out wide, and said to the night’s sky, “One time offer. You have thirty seconds to ravish me.” Then she had started counting. I loved imagining that. Lois' arms outstretched, looking up at the sky ... waiting. And then Superman appears and .... ravishes her. *me punching air in happiness*
KatherineKent/Victoria Lois: "You put up with me for the same reason I put up with you. It's because I'm completely in love with you." Clark: "And I love you ... Did we just make up?" Lois: "I think so."
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Hack from Nowheresville
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Love Lois sloppy in love with Clark.
thanks!
rkn
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Hack from Nowheresville
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At first I thought either L or C was having a silly dream with the bride and groom part - I'd totally forgotten about Cat & Phil by this point. Their families are hysterical. And THAT DRESS!!!!!! Making it hot pink means it's even funnier for me personally, because I wore a hot pink dress to prom. (Long story, involving a last-minute search through my mother's closet for a dress, though I still haven't figured out how she had it in the first place)
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KatherineKent: What a great way to greet my day! Oh my goodness. What a fantastic part. Oh, golly gee. Thank you. So many good bits but my Favourite... . . . I loved imagining that. Lois' arms outstretched, looking up at the sky ... waiting. And then Superman appears and .... ravishes her.
*me punching air in happiness* When you're having an illicit affair with a handsome superhero, sometimes you don't think straight. You do realize that by "ravishing", I meant the term in the most innocent of ways, right? Strictly necking. Otherwise, there would have been more details. Also, it would have been cruel to have it only last a few minutes. LOIS: Tell me about it! Thanks for reading. rkn: I was worried that Red Herring was too obvious. And THAT DRESS!!!!!! /rotflol/ Making it hot pink means it's even funnier for me personally, because I wore a hot pink dress to prom. (Long story, involving a last-minute search through my mother's closet for a dress, though I still haven't figured out how she had it in the first place) I figure Lois couldn't sneak out from her dojo in something appropriate for a wedding without her goon brigade noticing. So, maybe she used her secret cell phone to call Cat and ask her to leave an appropriate dress for her to wear in a secret location, so she could surprise Clark, by coming to the wedding. Cat, being Cat, of course, wouldn't have let the opportunity pass her by. Also, I figured it would be just the type of dress that Cat would've bought 10 years earlier (1984) after she discovered her fiance Oliver had cheated on her. In vogue at the time, and yet also a bit trashy, to annoy her ex. Plus, in the mid-80s neon colors were all the rage. :rolleyes: Sad, but true. You might want to ask Mom where she wore the dress. That might be a fun story.
VirginiaR. "On the long road, take small steps." -- Jor-el, "The Foundling" --- "clearly there is a lack of understanding between those two... he speaks Lunkheadanian and she Stubbornanian" -- chelo.
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Columnist
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Clark’s only official duty as ‘Man of Honor’ was to keep her brother in his pants until after the reception ended. I don't think that came out quite how you meant it. :p
"It is a remarkable dichotomy. In many ways, Clark is the most human of us all. Then...he shoots fire from the skies, and it is difficult not to think of him as a god. And how fortunate we all are that it does not occur to him." -Batman (in Superman/Batman #3 by Jeph Loeb)
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mrsMxyzptlk: I see you're enjoying reading between the lines. Clark’s only official duty as ‘Man of Honor’ was to keep her brother in his pants until after the reception ended. I don't think that came out quite how you meant it. :p Not *Clark's* pants, Peter's pants! Thanks for keeping me accurate.
VirginiaR. "On the long road, take small steps." -- Jor-el, "The Foundling" --- "clearly there is a lack of understanding between those two... he speaks Lunkheadanian and she Stubbornanian" -- chelo.
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It wasn’t as if he could stop using them completely. LEX: I can help with that! So minor, in fact, it was hardly worth mentioning.
Yeah, right. Keep on telling yourself that, Kent. As if Lois could ever get mad about that. That she realized that she didn’t love him enough to deal with his excess baggage. Umm… he’s wearing big-boy pants? Lois had told him, on more than one occasion, how he needed to grow a backbone and have his own opinions. CLARK: Lois, I thought you wanted to be on top? LOIS: Oh, will you just shut up and kiss me? CLARK: Okay. LOIS: CLARK: Lois had said that she did. Of course, she had said this to Lex Luthor, and not to Clark. So, she wants rich, human children? LOIS: I was *under cover*! So, she doesn’t really want children? Recently, Lois had been finding excuses just to kiss him and reassure him that she loved him. Batteries ran out? “One time offer. You have thirty seconds to ravish me.” Then she had started counting. Wrong *decade*! Clark hoped he could last longer than thirty seconds. Hope springs eternal? It had taken an inordinate amount of willpower to do no more than kiss Lois that night. LOIS: A half-hour previously, prior to her rooftop siren call, Clark had just watched her return from a date with Luthor. So, Lex had gotten her so hot and bothered, she had settled for Superman to squelch her itch? She was wearing one of those silky black cocktail dresses, which showed entirely too much leg and cleavage. So, dressed for the occasion? LEX: The best 10,000$ date ever. It had taken all his self-restraint to stop him from approaching her, throwing her over his shoulder, and simply walking out of the event. Oooooh! Caveman Clark! Neither of them had been thinking clearly that night. What if Lex has a satellite hovering over her apartment building? She would say that he had once more lied to her… if one counted the omission of something the same as telling a lie and, apparently, Lois was the type who did. So, when Lois goes to work at night without telling Clark which councilman she’s visiting at home that evening, is that also a lie by omission? Even though, he knew that he loved this Lois more fully and completely than he ever did that Lois from another dimension, he doubted she would believe him. I don’t think telling that to either Lois would be a wise choice. CANON CLARK: Or to her *husband*! The fact that she kept looking past all of those faults and coming back for more, routinely made her more awe-inspiring. Considering her track record with men, she might just be a glutton for punishment. “… to have and to hold, for richer and for poorer, until…?” the clergyman was asking when the groom interrupted. Huh? It’s already wedding time? Virgina…? “If she’ll have me,” he said with a wide grin to the bride. That doesn’t sound like Lex. Or Clark dreaming. ‘say’
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“Duh! Who could say ‘no’ to this studmuffin?” the bride said, Awwww…it’s Clark shook his head. He knew Cat and Phil’s wedding would be one for the record books, and he knew he shouldn’t be overly surprised, but a part of him hadn’t expected them to make a mockery of the proceedings. Is it too early to mention that their wedding pales compared to the marathon wedding attempts of Lois and Clark? Apparently, from the rumors he had heard the night before, neither side of the family would believe they were married unless they had witnessed it with their own eyes. Michael
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Hi Virginia! It looks like my FDK post (probably both of them, certainly the 2nd one) got corrupted during the board update. Michael
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Darth Michael: Hi Michael. It looks like my FDK post (probably both of them, certainly the 2nd one) got corrupted during the board update. I totally blame myself for not responding sooner. I'm so sorry. I did have a chance to read it the first time; I'm sad it won't be there for me to enjoy forever though. Well, better late than never (and before the boards decides to take another bite out of what's left).... It wasn’t as if he could stop using them completely. LEX: I can help with that! EW: /Covers up hard drive.../ Nothing to see here. These aren't the story plots you're looking for... As if Lois could ever get mad about that. LOIS: It's a gift, really. Getting mad. Umm… he’s wearing big-boy pants? LOIS: /lifts up SM's cape and checks out his pants/ Nope. Looks nice and tight to me. CLARK: /clears throat/ Um... Lois? CLARK: Lois, I thought you wanted to be on top? LOIS: Oh, will you just shut up and kiss me? CLARK: Okay. LOIS: /mad/ CLARK: /confused/ I don't think that's WHERE she'd want him to grow a backbone. LOIS: Now, if you were to say... /fades off into Nfic dream land/ Total aside here, I wonder if there's a smilie limit on these new boards. Hmmmmm. So, she wants rich, human children? LOIS: I was *under cover*! So, she doesn’t really want children? Yes, that will be a fun conversation.... or not. Umm... I don't think she'd want to use Lucy's birthday gift to her while Lex was watching. “One time offer. You have thirty seconds to ravish me.” Then she had started counting. Wrong *decade*! Lois wouldn't ask Clark to ravish her? She only means 'make out'. You know that, right? If he only took 30 seconds to actually ravish her, that'd be sad. It had taken an inordinate amount of willpower to do no more than kiss Lois that night. LOIS: Don't you mean: ? /Looked for kitten with saucer of cream, but this was the best I could find./ So, Lex had gotten her so hot and bothered, she had settled for Superman to squelch her itch? LEX: Now, wait a gosh darn second here! It's supposed to be the other way around. So, dressed for the occasion? LEX: The best 10,000$ date ever. CLARK: What if Lex has a satellite hovering over her apartment building? LEX: No comment. So, when Lois goes to work at night without telling Clark which councilman she’s visiting at home that evening, is that also a lie by omission? CLARK: Yes! LOIS: You don't trust me? CLARK: No! I mean, Yes, of course, I do. I mean. I don’t think telling that to either Lois would be a wise choice. CANON CLARK: Or to her *husband*! If canon Clark didn't know how alt-Clark felt about his wife, he's a naive one. Considering her track record with men, she might just be a glutton for punishment. LOIS: CLARK: And I don't care. LOIS: CLARK: No! I *do* care! I care very, very much! JIMMY: CK, you're . CAT: Oooooh. /bites bottom lip in thought/ Whips. Mmmmmm. Huh? It’s already wedding time? Virgina…? [ER: thinks I've skipped forward too much already] EW: That doesn’t sound like Lex. Or Clark dreaming. Random wedding that Lois happens to see while prepping for big nuptials with Lex? Ooops. Fixed. Awwww…it’s [The shotgun wedding] That's the one! Is it too early to mention that their wedding pales compared to the marathon wedding attempts of Lois and Clark? He doesn't know about canon Lois and Clark's trials in that department. For this couple... And that's where it got eaten. Thanks so much for the comments. I'll try to respond in a more timely manner next time.
Last edited by VirginiaR; 04/28/14 10:24 AM. Reason: Fix Quotes
VirginiaR. "On the long road, take small steps." -- Jor-el, "The Foundling" --- "clearly there is a lack of understanding between those two... he speaks Lunkheadanian and she Stubbornanian" -- chelo.
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Short reply: not all hope needs to be abandoned yet. If I get them back, I'll fix the fdk Michael
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Short reply: not all hope needs to be abandoned yet. If I get them back, I'll fix the fdk Michael You're the best!
VirginiaR. "On the long road, take small steps." -- Jor-el, "The Foundling" --- "clearly there is a lack of understanding between those two... he speaks Lunkheadanian and she Stubbornanian" -- chelo.
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EW: /Covers up hard drive.../ Nothing to see here. These aren't the story plots you're looking for... LOIS: /lifts up SM's cape and checks out his pants/ Nope. Looks nice and tight to me.
CLARK: /clears throat/ Um... Lois? :rotfloL: She seems awfully familiar with him. I don't think that's WHERE she'd want him to grow a backbone.
LOIS: Now, if you were to say... /fades off into Nfic dream land/ Total aside here, I wonder if there's a smilie limit on these new boards. Hmmmmm. So far, Annette doesn’t seem to have enabled one. At least, 30 smilies are okay in the preview… Quote: Batteries ran out? Umm... I don't think she'd want to use Lucy's birthday gift to her while Lex was watching. LEX: Darn! Thwarted again! Lois wouldn't ask Clark to ravish her? She only means 'make out'. You know that, right? If he only took 30 seconds to actually ravish her, that'd be sad. /points over at dark side/ CLARK: Yes! LOIS: You don't trust me? CLARK: No! I mean, Yes, of course, I do. I mean. help He can’t really win with her, can he? LOIS: I know *one* way where he can score wins. CAT: Oooooh. /bites bottom lip in thought/ Whips. Mmmmmm. The whole bit Random wedding that Lois happens to see while prepping for big nuptials with Lex? Yeah, right… Short reply: not all hope needs to be abandoned yet. If I get them back, I'll fix the fdk Am still hoping Annette will restore the old boards somewhere so we can copy the rest Michael
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LOIS: /lifts up SM's cape and checks out his pants/ Nope. Looks nice and tight to me.
CLARK: /clears throat/ Um... Lois? :rotfloL: She seems awfully familiar with him. MARTHA: What? You'd thought she'd be looking at his face? /FYI: Apparently, as you'll note, all gremlin codes have to be all lower case, now./ So far, Annette doesn’t seem to have enabled one. At least, 30 smilies are okay in the preview… I thought someone said they were going to put it back at 15, but it seems good at the moment. ER: Batteries ran out? EW: Umm... I don't think she'd want to use Lucy's birthday gift to her while Lex was watching. LEX: Darn! Thwarted again! It wasn't until after I wrote this did I realize you were referring to Clark.... cough... recharging her batteries. Lois wouldn't ask Clark to ravish her? She only means 'make out'. You know that, right? If he only took 30 seconds to actually ravish her, that'd be sad. /points over at dark side/ Yeah. And if you recall Lois's reaction to him hitting the buzzer at 30 seconds. CLARK: It wasn't 30 seconds... Was it? CLARK: Yes! LOIS: You don't trust me? CLARK: No! I mean, Yes, of course, I do. I mean. help He can’t really win with her, can he? LOIS: I know *one* way where he can score wins. CLARK: How exactly do I win if you die? Short reply: not all hope needs to be abandoned yet. If I get them back, I'll fix the fdk Am still hoping Annette will restore the old boards somewhere so we can copy the rest And this was just getting to the good part about Lois in the hot pink dress... /That's the rumor they've been spreading./ I've been going back over lots of my old FDK threads, and tons of my FDK responses are gone or shortened too. It makes it appear as if I don't reply to people's feedback AT ALL! Really, people, it's not me! It's just the upgrade!
VirginiaR. "On the long road, take small steps." -- Jor-el, "The Foundling" --- "clearly there is a lack of understanding between those two... he speaks Lunkheadanian and she Stubbornanian" -- chelo.
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Personally, Clark wanted to just sweep his whole past under the rug and just move forward with Lois. Won't work, he has to meet his past head on. He feared, though, as he revealed more and more about himself to Lois that he would discover the max strength of her tolerance when she finally decided that she couldn’t deal with him anymore. I think this is why we can so sympathize with Wrong Clark, because we all fear we will reach that breaking point. In L&C they faced some breaking points, but with his obsession with a Lois who is this Lois, and yet not this Lois, Clark has a really tough path to go. That was what had happened with Lana, wasn’t it? That she realized that she didn’t love him enough to deal with his excess baggage. But Lois is not Lana. It will take a long time for him to believe this in his inner heart. Clark knew that Lois wasn’t Lana. Knowing and feeling are not the same though. Thankfully, they were nothing alike. Lana had wanted him to give in to all her demands. Maybe she would have loved him more if he had stood up to her. Lois had told him, on more than one occasion, how he needed to grow a backbone and have his own opinions. This might be just because Lois is more honest with herself. Lana had hated his alien side. Lois had loved Superman first. To be fair, the alien side and Superman are not the same thing. Superman was the alien side repackaged with all the plus. Lana had loved that he was her bodyguard. Lois had risked her life to protect him. That is a contrast that I can't nit-pick at. Lana had always found excuses not to be affectionate. Recently, Lois had been finding excuses just to kiss him and reassure him that she loved him. That makes me wonder why he ever got engaged to Lana, but I think I sadly understand how that happened.
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He had missed Lois so much that Cat had insisted that he take her ticket to the charity function, which Clark knew that Lois was attending. Putting Clark (as opposed to Superman) so close to Lois in public might not be wise. He had arrived during the last hour dressed in his tuxedo and watched her from within the room as she circled around with Luthor, appearing more bored than thrilled to be there. Nothing coulbe be better for their relationship than her to seem bored with Luthor. The only excitement he saw was when she had spotted him lounging at the end of the bar. He had raised his glass to her, and listened as her heart rate sped up. Good thing Luthor lacks super-hearing. Was she with Luthor at that moment? It had taken all his self-restraint to stop him from approaching her, throwing her over his shoulder, and simply walking out of the event. Part of me thinks "stop himself from" would read better, but maybe I just like the self form too much. He reined himself back from these thoughts and returned to the dilemma of how to tell Lois about his true past. Explain all the reasons he left, not just wanting to find his own Lois, or a Lois he could have. He didn’t think Lois knowing his history in the other dimension was relevant in the grand scheme of things, especially in light of the curse. I think she would feel differently. Regrettably, in this case, learning that Clark had met and fallen in love with another Lois before he had met her, would only hurt Lois. I'm not sure about that. That he can love her over the more refined Lois from canon tells something about him. Even though, he knew that he loved this Lois more fully and completely than he ever did that Lois from another dimension, he doubted she would believe him. At least he never had sex with canon Lois.
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He would understand this decision, and he doubted it would change how he felt about her. He still does not fully trust her. After Lana, I'm not surprised though. Phil’s sister, Gloria, looped her arm around Clark’s elbow, laughing. “You’d think she said her water broke, but we know it’s much too early for that.” Actually, it might have happened this early, it would just be really bad for the baby. Clark blushed and glanced away. He could have lived without hearing the real reason for their hasty departure. Good thing Lois was not here, otherwise she might get ideas for their wedding. Lois: We aren't getting married. Clark grabbed Peter’s elbow and dragged him out the front door of the church before the little girl’s father could reach him and Superman had to intervene. Yeah, Clark saves another life.
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Nerds never get laid, the groom being the exception. Thus his rule is proved not workable. “I’m not…” Clark sputtered. What had Cat told her brother? “I have a girlfriend. Her name is Wanda.” I love mentions of Wanda. “What the goose doesn’t know is good for the gander,” Peter said, bouncing his eyebrows. Peter is horrible. Other than that one fatal flaw, the woman looked amazing, despite the fact that she was wearing a hot pink prom dress, which showed as much cleavage as a Suicide Slum prostitute. Perhaps it was due to that fact. That old teenage fantasy was still clear in Clark’s mind. It helps that it is the cleavage of the right woman. “I looked,” Clark insisted, his pride still bruised by Cat’s earlier barb. Only long enough to learn it was not Lois. “That dress says she’s poor and desperate, Kent, but she’s still out of your league. Peter is the type of judger who really annoys me. Under that dress, she’s a ten, guar-an-teed,” Peter retorted, pushing Clark’s extended arm out of his way. “Trust me on this. Superman has nothing on my x-ray eyes.” Who needs x-ray vision with that dress? “On the dress?”
“On the friendship,” the woman replied. “This dress was condemned to death in the eighties.” I love these lines. She surrounded his neck with her arms, rocking back and forth in time with the music and against his body. A resurgence of his old fantasy returned, only this time with a twist… This time, it was real. Real always beats fantasy. Not wishing to verbally correct her wrong fact, Clark dipped his head and brushed her lips with his. “You’re not blonde, Minha.” He used the name.
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“Wanda,” Clark moaned, when he finally released her lips from his. “I never thought I’d see you…” Clark is good if he can moan her fake name. “Oh?” He ran his hands down her back and rested his hands on her hips, his fingers dipping lower. “So, Wanda is easy, is she?” Wanda: As easy as you want me to be. “Wanda!” Clark interjected. “Wanda Detroit, my girlfriend.” Good save, Clark. Better safe than sorry, the walls have ears. I like this part even more now than when I betaed it.
John Pack Lambert
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