Lois & Clark Forums Forums Fan Fiction Lois & Clark Fanfic FDK: Nothing but a Luthor on the Way, part 7

But I want you to know one thing: I’m not Superman.”

“My, what a pleasure, Superman. Or should I say, Mr. Kent?”

He looked at the world below; at the place that had become his home. He couldn’t lose all he’d worked so hard to achieve. He couldn’t let Luthor, of all people, win. He had to find a way out. If not for him, he had to do it for Lois.

He looked at the world below; at the place that had become his home. He couldn’t lose all he’d worked so hard to achieve. He couldn’t let Luthor, of all people, win. He had to find a way out. If not for him, he had to do it for Lois.

Would you have rather not knowing about Clark?”

“Can’t you see that’s not the point? No one but Clark should have told me that.”

“But he’d made no intention...”

She didn’t let him finish. “How can you be so sure? I’m not defending his attitude; I can’t. But that doesn’t mean what you did was right. It was his secret. I don’t even know how you found out and, before you try to explain, I don’t want to know. But you had no right.

“Lois, I... I know that both Clark and Superman mean a lot to you. I just couldn’t bear the fact that he’d been dishonest with you, after all you’ve done for him.”

How she wished he wasn’t right. It was so hard to fight his words when he was saying exactly what had been on her mind since she’d found out Clark’s secret. But, for some reason, she couldn’t avoid defending him. <<I’m not defending him, >> she mentally pointed out. That Clark hadn’t behaved correctly didn’t justify Lex’s attitude. That was all she needed him to realize. “Lex, if you can’t assume that what you did wasn’t right, no matter how true your words were, there’s no point in carrying on with this conversation or with...”

How could he refute her words when he’d asked himself those very same questions? Every time he hadn’t been completely honest with her, it had hurt. For a man with moral beliefs as strong as his, it’d been a continuing incongruity. He believed and fought for truth, yet lied to the woman he said was his whole life. And she was right; he had been deceiving her all along. The worst part was that, if he told her his worst fear, the one thing that had always made him keep Clark and Superman as two different people in her eyes, she’d be infuriated. Worse, she’d be greatly offended. With no effort, he could hear her saying that she couldn’t believe he thought she was that shallow; that he should have known better. It didn’t matter whether she really believed it or not; if she deep down realized there was some truth in it, she’d still choose to look offended. She was too proud. How could he then confess that his secret had been kept that way because he wanted her to love HIM, Clark, the man in the business suit, the man without powers... the ordinary man? Mostly after he himself had accepted that there was not two, but only one person. Hadn’t he convinced himself that Clark Kent didn’t fade away when he wore the suit? That the powers were as much a part of his regular life as they were of his heroic acts? Why wasn’t it the same where Lois was concerned?

Finally, in a mere whisper, he said the scary words, “I wanted you to notice me. It’s not a matter of pride; I needed to feel that you could learn to value in me, your partner, all the great things you admire in Superman. Without forgetting my many flaws, and realizing that there are good things in me; that I have a lot to offer, if only you would let me. I needed you to see the real me. The man behind... the man inside the suit... But without being dazzled by the halo of perfection you seem to perceive when you face the hero.”

Scared, she realized it was so easy to just lose herself in his softness, in the tenderness his voice bore, in his care. SO many feelings she’d never known. It felt like standing on a cliff, staring at the darkness below, suspecting there was something good awaiting, but also aware of the chances of it being an illusion. He could be lying; she’d been there before, and she had vowed to never return. She had thought he could be different and in just a few hours the image she’d built up of him had fallen apart. Was she willing to forget? Was it something she could do?

There was nothing strange in her not being home four nights before her wedding day. What was it he'd expected?

Poor Clark! He pours out his heart to Lois - and that was a lovely, very well-written conversation - and what does she do? She sends him away! But not before she tells him that Luthor, of all people, knows who he is. Poor, poor Clark!!

Wonderful, Cris. I figured where he was heading with this, and it was satisfying to see.
The following discussion was insightful, emotional and very natural. In fact, the entire segment showed a wonderful understanding of the characters.

I found Clark took the whole "Luthor knows" far too calmly. I figured his first thought would have been to protect his parents.

Cris, this was a very scary part for a couple of reasons