Lois stared at her wedding planner book, summoning courage to open it again.
A flood of memories came back, making her uncertain how she should approach it all. She recalled feeling happy and reading her mother’s letter on her first attempted wedding day, feeling over-the- moon happy at the idea of marrying Clark. Then she remembered the panic when Joel was kidnapped… and the worry she lived with when Clark was exchanged for their son…
She almost wondered if they were cursed, unable to get married… She tried to remember if she had seen a wedding ring on Clark’s finger in the future. She wasn’t sure… but she couldn’t stand the idea of something going wrong this time.
She remembered something future Clark had said though: ‘We do great, Lois.’ She took a deep breath, anchoring herself to that memory to give herself courage to dive into wedding plans once again.
Lois thought about Clark and last night; how romantic he had been. She smiled to herself, recalling how dessert had been forgotten… until they needed a midnight snack after some amorous activity. Lois suppressed a giggle, remembering feeding Clark tiramisu, and how they had ended up on the kitchen floor, laughing and kissing, licking mascarpone off each other’s lips.
She took a deep breath. She could do this…
Chloe had laughed when Lois had first showed her the Big Bridal Book, stuffed full of wedding ideas, teasing Lois that Chloe had no idea she was the gung-ho wedding type. But secretly, Lois had been dreaming of the perfect wedding for a long time…
She knew that this time it would be different. This time, they would do the ceremony in a church, possibly giving more credibility to the idea that it would actually happen. But as Lois reselected decorations, she couldn’t help but wonder if another disaster was merely looming around the corner…
~L&C~
“Dad wants to invite a few of his closest friends. I told him that it would be fine,” Lois told Clark later, sitting at a café having lunch.
Clark looked decidedly nervous. “Is that really such a good idea? After what we went through with General Wilson? How do we know that he didn’t get to them? Or that they were there and saw—“ he couldn’t even finish his sentence, he was so upset.
“I know you are worried, Clark. But—I mean, who else are we going to invite?” she said, trying another angle. “My sister, your mom, and your friends…” she twisted her engagement ring around nervously on her finger. “Okay, I admit, it might be a bit risky mixing Dad’s military friends with your super friends… but the VRA didn’t go through. We’re all on the same side now… and no one has to know…”
“Your dad knows, Lois,” Clark said pointedly.
“That doesn’t mean he’s going to blab to everyone he knows, Clark! Listen to yourself! It will be fine,” she said,
reaching across the table for his hand.
He sighed, giving her hand a gentle squeeze. “You’re right. I guess I’m just---“ he glanced around, and then lowered his voice. “Worried. Last time we tried this—“ he glanced over at his son, who was playing with cut up noodles Lois had brought, sitting in the restaurant-provided highchair.
Lois glanced at Joel. “I know. Trust me, I’ve been worried too,” she admitted.
“You have?”
She nodded. “Not about us – just about getting to the us part. But Dad promised me he knows these guys very well. He went to the Military Academy with them. They are like his brothers… and some of them are like my uncles. It will be fine, Clark. Trust me.”
~L&C~
Lieutenant John Henry Cable stared at the gold rock in his hands. He barely remembered visiting General Slade Wilson in jail, let alone digging up half a field in Smallville…
But the gold rock had a purpose. It was to stop the alien; General Wilson had been clear about that. All he had to do was go to his buddy’s daughter’s wedding, and switch the rings.
It was his duty to keep his country safe, the world safe.
And he would follow through.
~L&C~
Clark came home a few nights later to Lois pacing excitedly in the living room.
“It’s about time you got here!” she said with a grin. She raced over to him and gave him a kiss, then tugged him by the hand to the sofa. “This came from your mom today. It’s the same one I saw! I can’t believe it’s actually the same! I mean, of course it was you – but still, to know what you will be—“
Clark interrupted her tirade, trying to follow. “Lois, what on earth are you talking about?”
“This!” she said, pointing to a flat grey box tied with a black, silk ribbon. “I knew Mrs. K could sew, but wait until you get a load of this!”
Clark stared at the box, confused. “It’s not my birthday… what’s going on?”
Lois was so excited that she was about to burst. She took the card from the box and handed it to him. Clark opened it, reading, “For when you’re ready. Love, Mom.”
“Go on! Open it!” Lois encouraged.
Clark undid the smooth ribbon and opened the box. There in blue, red, and yellow – his favorite colors—was a suit, meant to be worn by the Blur, with the symbol of Clark’s Kryptonian family emblazoned on the chest. “What is this? I could never wear this,” he said, pulling the suit out to have a closer look.
“Clark, trust me. You will. I know. I saw you in it,” she persisted, her fingers unable to resist tracing the ‘S’ representing the House of El.
“Lois, I—can’t,” said Clark, his voice heavy with uncertainty as he dropped the suit back in the box. “It’s—just not me.”
“Clark, but it is. Or it will be you.” Seeing that he still wasn’t buying it, she tried another angle. “Okay, I get that maybe you’re not ready right now, but trust me. There will come a day when you can step out in this suit, and the whole world will be watching – but in awe, and with gratitude.”
Clark stared at her, still unsure, but fingering the edges of the cape. “I don’t want to be ogled at and admired. I just—“ Clark shook his head turning away from the box, and pulled Lois closer to him. “I just want us. To get married, to raise Joel. And yeah, I do want to help people.” He stared down at the box with a heavy sigh. “But I don’t know if that is the way to go about doing it.”
Lois laid her hands gently on his chest. “Clark, look at me.”
He turned his worried expression to meet her encouraging eyes. “You may not think you are ready. But I am sure that a day will come when this suit will be like second nature to you.”
“But how do I keep my identity secret, Lois? If everyone knows I am the one blowing out fires and saving people, I’ll never have a life. We’ll never have a life. And I don’t wish that for us.”
“Clark, I know you will always want to help. But you’re right. You can’t walk around as Clark Kent saving the day.” She stared at him a moment, biting her lip.
He could tell she was forming a plan. “What is it?” he asked with just a hint of dread.
Lois reached into her purse, but kept her hand inside. “Just hear me out. I recently had a glimpse of the future and—“ she pulled out a pair of thick, black glasses.
“What are you doing with those?” he asked suspiciously.
She presented them to him. “Smallville, what if you played down the hometown hero just a tad?” Her eyes swung towards the box with the suit. “Then, when you need to go save the day, no one will be looking to mild-mannered Clark Kent.”
“Why can’t I just keep doing what I’m doing?”
“Because—this,” she said, tapping the box. “Is a symbol. Just like your shield. But instead of leaving a calling card---why not just be that symbol?”
He thought a moment, and then took the glasses out of her hand. He stared at them, and then reluctantly put them on. “I guess I should be wearing a mask. Unfortunately, I've lived my entire life up until this point without needing one… I mean, this is the face that my parents raised. It's the face of the man that you love. And I don't want to deny who I am when I'm out there doing what I was born to do.”
“I don’t want you to either. But what if you didn’t have to hide as the Blur? What if – Clark Kent became the disguise?”
He nodded, mulling over what she was saying. “When I'm out there in the red and blue, and I'm saving people, that's who I really am. I am the Blur, and I always have been.”
“Exactly. You are the Blur – and Clark Kent. But they are both just words, Clark. You make them into something… And if you play down the Clark Kent, and play up the Blur—“
“No one will connect the two.”
She nodded. “So, what do you think? Are you willing to give it a try, so that one day the world can see the Blur?”
“Do you mind? If your fiancé – is the guy with the glasses?”
She wrapped her arms around his shoulders. “Personally, I don’t mind the bump in your geek factor.”
“Really?” he answered with a smile, pulling her in closer.
“Nope. Not one bit… especially since I can’t wait to see you in that suit,” she teased, giving him a light kiss.
He rolled his eyes. “Spandex, really? What was my mom thinking?”
She leaned up to kiss him again. “She was thinking… better make sure no one will be looking at his face.”
~L&C~
Sam Lane sat back in his office chair, staring at an old family photo of his girls – Lois, Lucy, and Ella. He picked up the photo, the solid brass frame cool in his hands. How quickly time goes by…
It was their last night in Moscow before their flight back to the States. They had been in Russia almost a full year, and while living abroad had been a challenge in many ways, Sam and Ella had only grown closer.
He’d admired how she had tried to learn a bit about the culture and the language, taking courses off-base and insisting when he was around that they visit a museum or a market. She never did anything half way, his Ella. She lived just as she loved, with her whole heart, and full of passion.
Sam wanted to make their last night memorable, and so he had booked a reservation at a highly recommended restaurant in the center, near the Kremlin. Sam wasn’t always good at being romantic, but he knew it would be difficult to head back to Smallville after everything they’d experienced in this strange, but fascinating country.
At dinner that night, sitting there in the candlelight, Ella seemed pensive. She was beautiful in a light, chiffon blue dress, but she was preoccupied with something. Sam knew that being a military wife was difficult, but he thought she’d be happy with the thought of going home.
“Are you going to miss Russia?” he asked her as they scanned the menus.
“Me? Oh, I don’t know. It’s been very fascinating – if a little frustrating at times. I think it will be nice to be home for a while… do you know if you really will be home for a while?” she asked nervously, though she tried to play it off as no big deal.
Sam put down his menu and noticed his wife’s preoccupied stare. “Well, I’ll get about three months R&R, and then the next deployment.”
“I see… well, what if I stayed home this time?” she asked, worrying her napkin, which was still in its silver ring on the table next to her plate.
“Why would you—“ Sam started. But then he saw Ella smile, and she reached her hand across the table to him.
“I was going to wait until we got home to tell you…but this is such a nice way to end our stay here and—Sam, we’re going to have a baby,” she said, her eyes shimmering with tears of joy.
“A baby…” he said, delight and trepidation setting his heart to thumping in his chest.
“You are happy, aren’t you?”
“Of course, Ella. How long have you known?”
She pushed her hair back behind her ear, a shy smile on her face. “Just since yesterday. Oh, Sam. It’s been killing me keeping it a secret!”
Sam leaned across the small table and kissed his wife. “Then of course you’ll have to stay home… and I’ll see what I can do about either getting longer time off or being back in time for the baby.”
“I know we’ll work out something,” she said, smiling happily.
Sam pulled a small box he had somehow snuck into the restaurant without Ella noticing. “I was going to wait until after dinner, but now seems like the appropriate time.”
“What is that? A present for me?” Ella asked in happy surprise.
“I was at that market square that you keep telling me about…. And I saw this old woman selling these glass figurines. She told me this one meant ---how did it go? ‘Nadeyat'sya.’”
Ella took the small box and opened it, pulling out a blue glass figurine of a bird. “It’s beautiful, Sam,” she said, turning the figure around in her hand to admire it. “What did you say it means?”
“Now, I worked all day long to practice how to say it in Russian. And I asked a few buddies of mine what it means… it means ‘hope,’ Ella,” he said softly.
Ella touched her belly, where a tiny life was already growing inside her. “Hope. That’s the perfect sentiment for this evening, Sam. Hope…” she mused quietly, the glass bird glowing in the candlelight.
Ella had kept that glass bird with them every time they moved. He loved how she would tell the story about where it came from to the girls, and even when Ella became ill, how that bird had given her strength… Sam felt sadness wash over him, recalling how hard those last days had been. But Ella had never given up… and even towards the end, she had always kept Old Blue nearby, her talisman of hope.
He thought he remembered putting Old Blue in a box of Lois’ things, long ago, since it was sort of her bird as well. After all, Ella had been pregnant with Lois when Sam had given it to her. But he wondered if Lois remembered it.
Sam knew Lois had some of her old things at the Kents’, but there was one box that had stayed hidden in the back of Lois’ closet for years. He remembered that was where Old Blue had ended up, and he felt it might be time to give it to Lois again. She was a mother herself now, and was getting married – finally, after all she and her fiancé, Clark, had been through.
Sam wasn’t sure, but he thought it might be Ella talking to him… he needed Lois to have that box, and especially to have Old Blue.
~L&C~
“It’s like Christmas around here or something,” Lois laughed, carrying in a big brown box from the front porch. “First your super suit and now this…” her voice faltered, as she recognized her crayon markings on the outside of the box.
“Lois, what is it?” Clark asked, seeing her expression. “Is something wrong?”
She shook her head, setting the box gently down on the kitchen table. “No… I just know what’s in this box. Well, not exactly, but I know it’s a minefield… it’s things from when my mom—“ she couldn’t finish.
Clark laid a hand gently on her shoulder. “You don’t have to open it now, Lois,” he said kindly.
She shook her head, and wiped away an escaped tear. “No, I do. I need to. Because I’ve imagined for years what’s in here, and it’s fueled endless guilt and—I need to know. Now more than ever,” she looked up at him. “Clark, there’s been a part of me missing—my mom. I mean, I know in some ways, she’s always with me, but I left so many questions unanswered, too afraid of what the answer would be….” Lois pulled one flap of the box open, almost afraid to look in; but as she peeked over, she gasped, covering her mouth involuntarily.
“Lois, what is it?” Clark asked, worried.
She pulled out a crystal blue bird, and tears shone brightly in her eyes. “Oh, my God. It's Old Blue,” she whispered reverently. “Mom used to keep it in her kitchen window. I haven't seen it since...” Lois’ voice faltered, and once more, Clark gave her shoulder a reassuring squeeze. “I never went to visit her in the hospital, Clark,” she said, full of shame. “What kind of kid refuses to visit their sick mom?”
Clark gave her a sympathetic look. “A really scared one.”
“She was there for five weeks and... I didn't... “ Lois stopped, her emotions too painful. “I didn't say good-bye to her,” she eventually got out. Lois looked into the box and pulled out an old VHS tape. “But it looks like she did. This is from the hospital,” she said, staring at the video cassette, suddenly looking very uncertain. “Clark, what if she's angry... that I didn't go see her? You know? I'm not sure I can face this.”
“Lois, you shouldn’t feel guilty for not wanting to open up old wounds.”
“Haven’t you felt like something was missing in your life, not having all the answers to why your parents sent you here? That ice palace father of yours--”
“Is a machine. It’s different, Lois.”
“He sent you here and trained you. He does love you, Clark—“
Clark glanced away from her gaze, uncomfortable with the subject. “Maybe I should go on patrol,” he murmured vaguely.
“Clark, don’t do that.”
“Do what?”
“Distance yourself,” she said with a sigh. “Look, I’m sorry. I don’t know what it’s like to be you, granted. But I know it can’t be easy with Jor-El as your father… and my mom—I just don’t know if I’m ready to face this.”
He pulled her into his chest for a hug. “You don’t have to face it alone, Lois. Do you want me to watch the tape with you?”
She sighed, staring at the black video cassette. A sticker on the side, written in her mom’s handwriting said, ‘For Lois.’ “I think I need to do this on my own, Clark. These are past memories that I need to face… to deal with, so I can move on. So we can get married,” she added with a smile, wrapping her arms around Clark’s neck.
“I know you and I will be fine. But you’re right. There are some—unresolved questions when it comes to Jor-El. I’ve had to relate to him through a computer… and there are times I wonder what it would have been like growing up on Krypton. But I know that I never would have met the amazing people here… I would have never met you,” he said, pulling her closer. “And when I think of it in those terms—Lois, our love is even more incredible. Because you’re my soul mate, Lois. Somehow, across the universe, I ended up here—with you. And that in itself, is miraculous.”
“Wow, Clark,” she breathed. “You know, I think I have you all figured out, and then, you say something like that and take my breath away…”
There were no more words between them, as their eyes met and held, each marveling in what they had in each other, though circumstances had taken others away from them. Clark leaned down, and brushed his lips against her jaw, and Lois slipped her hand under Clark’s t-shirt, feeling the smooth muscles in his back.
Clark trailed kisses down her neck, and then Lois brought his head up so she could look in his eyes. “I’m yours forever,” she whispered.
Clark suddenly lifted her, and carried her over to the sofa, gently setting her down as he settled over top of her. He brushed her hair out of her eyes. “Lois, I think I knew from almost the moment we met that you were someone special to me…. It took me years to accept how special because it scared me, I guess. But then, it was so easy to fall in love with you…” he said, kissing her cheek.
Lois wrapped her arms around Clark. “I know I loved you for longer than I ever admitted…”
That made Clark pause a moment. “When did you know? When we started working at the Planet together?” he asked, punctuating his question with a kiss on her collarbone.
She shook her head.
“When you spent Thanksgiving here for the first time?”
She shook her head again, inviting him to kiss her chin.
“When you moved in?” he asked again.
She shook her head once more, a grin beginning to form on her lips. Clark leaned up to kiss her lips. “Tell me… when?”
“Well, I’d have to say… must have been when I got my first glance of you buck naked in that field, Smallville. Ain’t no one got a body like you,” she teased.
“Lois, be serious.”
She giggled. “Okay… “ she said, sitting up just a bit. “I knew it at Chloe’s wedding. Clark—that almost kiss,” she breathed out, settling back down on the couch, her hand lazily stroking his arm.
“Oh,” he answered, sounding guilty. “And then I went and threw Lana in your face. I’m sorry, Lois.”
“All good, Smallville. Thanks to my time traveling adventure… do you remember?” she asked curiously.
“Wait, I do… Lana and I kissed but we didn’t—“ he stopped himself before he finished that sentence. “You –saved me, Lois.”
She grinned. “Well, I had to pay you back somehow for all the millions of times you saved me somehow.”
“Happy to do it,” he said, getting back to kissing her neck. “Now, where were we?”
