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#258194 09/08/14 11:40 PM
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Wrong Place, Wrong Time, Wrong Clark TOC can be found Here

Any comments?


VirginiaR.
"On the long road, take small steps." -- Jor-el, "The Foundling"
---
"clearly there is a lack of understanding between those two... he speaks Lunkheadanian and she Stubbornanian" -- chelo.
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Why am I not surprised that those women worked up the courage to hit on Clark? I am surprised it was only two, though. I'm sure Clark was wishing Lois was there (she'd most certainly get permission to rub his back down... with baby oil so that no one else would try to give him sunblock, of course.)

I kind of hoped Lois was the one that was getting the DP. Wonder what's going to happen next? She going to try and get Stern in as a partner? Sell to Stern? I find it interesting that she went into the building (but not out of character or surprising.)

Lois still has one more surprise in store once the Luthor estate is out of court... unless this is that one piece.



CLARK: No. I'm just worried I'm a jinx.
JONATHAN: A jinx?
CLARK: Yeah. Let's face it, ever since she's known me, Lois's been kidnapped, frozen, pushed off buildings, almost stabbed, poisoned, buried alive and who knows what else, and it's all because of me.
-"Contact" (You're not her jinx, you're her blessing.)
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Christina: Thank you for commenting. smile

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Why am I not surprised that those women worked up the courage to hit on Clark? I am surprised it was only two, though.
It's Las Vegas in mid June, 90+ degrees, and a Monday to boot. Plus, it's before noon; how many of the vacationing party girls looking for a hook-up are awake at this hour? The day was still young.

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I'm sure Clark was wishing Lois was there (she'd most certainly get permission to rub his back down... with baby oil so that no one else would try to give him sunblock, of course.)
LOIS: *Only* his back? What about his chest? /shakes dirty thoughts out of her head/ I mean, 'No, I wouldn't.'
CLARK: No?
LOIS: No. I need the sun protection more than he does, so I'd let him rub me down. Anyway, a woman would have to be pretty stupid to hit on my... man while I'm right there.
LINDA & MAYSON: wave
LOIS: I rest my case. On the other hand, I'm sure Clark wouldn't say 'no' if I offered to rub lotion into his skin after a long hot shower back in the room.
CLARK: help

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I kind of hoped Lois was the one that was getting the DP. Wonder what's going to happen next? She going to try and get Stern in as a partner? Sell to Stern? I find it interesting that she went into the building (but not out of character or surprising.)
She has her reasons. /points to her checking the phones at the end of the scene./

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Lois still has one more surprise in store once the Luthor estate is out of court... unless this is that one piece.
huh You mean Arianna? Bender told Lois that Luthor didn't mention her in his will.

Or did you mean the $50 mil in the bank account under her name? Why would he give her the Daily Planet AND the means with which to rebuild it? That would give Lois way too much control and power in her own life. It's illogical for a man who plans on controlling every aspect of her life until she is a docile lump.

LOIS: Also, Luthor's alive, so what's in or not in his will is immaterial.


VirginiaR.
"On the long road, take small steps." -- Jor-el, "The Foundling"
---
"clearly there is a lack of understanding between those two... he speaks Lunkheadanian and she Stubbornanian" -- chelo.
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Lois took a deep breath before stepping off the elevator. She had just come from a perplexing interview at EPRAD, which hadn’t gone down in the way she thought it would. No, not at all.
dizzy We’ve just been in Vegas!
WELLS: wave
LOIS: No, you stupid! I’m just interviewing for the PR staff position at EPRAD. Girl’s got to eat and it’s either that or working in the middle of LFI magazine.
CLARK: You mean the centerfold position?
LOIS: Oh, shut up! I already said that I’m taking the PR gig.

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The burden had been left to her, and she was afraid that she had made the wrong decision.
She taken the job before she realized that being in PR means being nice to other reporters?

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Oh, she had plausible excuses for the choice she had made, but that was all they were, excuses.
LEX: I believe they’re called ‘reasons’.

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It was an insane title for a law firm, she decided. What else would they call themselves? Attorneys for Crime? Attorneys at Play?
Oh, and here I thought it was because of Bender bending the law.

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Lois’s curiosity on why Bender wanted to talk to her was tinged with dread. She doubted Luthor would fake his death only to show up two days later in his lawyer’s office, of all places.
Well…it would be convenient?

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Still, Lois had followed that phone call with one to her favorite A.D.A.
Because Mayson hasn’t yet consummated her lust with Clark?

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Mayson had said she could think of a hundred reasons why Luthor’s estate might want to sue her.
Wouldn’t they send a pizza delivery boy to bring her the summons?

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nor did she want to worry Clark by calling him at six-thirty a.m. Vegas time.
Plus, he might not be back in his room yet. Cathouses are usually open throughout the night. I’d assume…
LOIS: Cat often came to the office straight from work.

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“I’m Mr…. was Mr. Luthor’s personal attorney, Ms. Lane. There are others in my firm who handle the business end of things,” explained the lawyer.
So, they’re giving control to the *lawyers*?

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Before the wedding Mr.
[Linked Image] A dash of ink might liven up the temporal clase.

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Luthor signed some paperwork to ensure your financial well-being should anything happen to him.
He signed her over to some Mid-Eastern sheik he thought deserved a go at his bed bunny?

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Had he made her his beneficiary?

Luthor?

Well, it would explain why Bender was being nice all of a sudden.
clap

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The lawyer slid a document across the table to her. As she picked it up, he continued, “According to Mr. Luthor, you two had an arrangement that should you agree to marry him, he would turn over the ownership of the Daily Planet to you.”
Oh. Right. But she said *noooooo!* *NEVER!* And ‘you go and shove that ring where it will never be found safe by a proctologist’.

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Lois’s heart began to race with anticipation as she studied the papers he had given her. Unfortunately, they were written in a foreign language – Legalese.
laugh

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“Mr. Luthor signed the ownership papers over to you while you were waiting to walk down the aisle.”
LEX: Oops?

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“I understand he wanted to present it to you on your honeymoon.
He was hoping to get some special birthday nookie from his new bride due to the joyous occasion, thus making the honeymoon video much more entertaining to watch?
CLARK: sick

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She stared at him. This must be some big huge practical joke.
Like Lex jumping out of a Jumping-Jack box?

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“Contrary to what the FBI and those with the Metropolis Police Department might feel, Mr. Luthor was an honest man,” Bender went on.
[Linked Image]

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“If he agreed to something, even if he should later regret the decision, he would honor it.”
Oh. An *honest* thief!

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unable to believe that Luthor would let go of such a valuable prize in his holdings and so easily at that. A prize despite his having blown it up.
But since she can’t afford to rebuild it…Maybe she could get the money from her husband by offering him sexual favors?

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He didn’t, on the other hand, leave you any funds with which to rebuild it,”
See?

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She didn’t even want to think what the sick bastard would have required her to do to get the money.
[Linked Image] [Linked Image] [Linked Image]

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“I’ll need the keys to the building and the property title, if you don’t mind.”
Which reminds me…What about property taxes. And is there a gift-tax in the US? Over here, if you receive property of any sort of significant value from anyone but the closest of family, the state collects 10% or 15% (I think) of the value.

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Should it become public knowledge that Lois had received the Daily Planet assets from Luthor during her investigation, it would tarnish her reputation as a reporter.
What she earns on her back should in no way reflect what she does while standing up.

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Reporters weren’t supposed to receive financial gain for the work they did as part of their job, any more than politicians, judges, or any public officials were.
And since it’s mostly the reporters who are living meager lives, I’m assuming they’re the only ones not smart enough to exploit every loophole there is?
LINDA: Ooooh! I finally have 6 zeros on my bank account balance. Nice! Let’s see, what’s next…

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A shadow fell over his body and Clark opened his eyes behind his sunglasses. “Yes?”
Jimmy? Or some hot blonde?

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“Um…” The young woman in the bikini blushed.
Ooooh! A hot blonde.

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She quickly recovered and shot him an alluring smile.
She hoping he might rub her with sun lotion?

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“I… uh… noticed that you have been lying here for quite a while and… um… I just wanted to make sure that you hadn’t fallen asleep. I didn’t want you to awake with a serious sunburn.”
Oh, she’s hoping to rub *him* with sun lotion.
HOT BLONDE: It’s like a Chippendale’s show! [Linked Image]

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“Inside?” she sputtered with confusing disappointment as if no man had ever shown as little interest in her as he had.
She never met a gay guy, then?
STEPH: I have.

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“Yes. I need to buy my girlfriend a gift. Our anniversary is coming up,” he said.
Subtle.
CANON CLARK: Why would he lie? I never lied like that to Mayson…

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This was the second time this morning Clark had needed to go inside to avoid a well-intentioned young woman
No, I think their intentions are of a rather dubious nature.

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The first one had actually asked him to help her apply sunscreen. He had noticed a similar bottle in Stephanie’s hands.
:lauhg:

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He had lost it in his old dimension and it annoyed him to no end when someone invaded it on their own volition.
They’re not invading. They just want some happens-in-Vegas-stays-in-Vegas time with him.

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He assumed that they meant well, but he wished they would just leave him alone.
He could wear a wedding band?

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Actually, he had enjoyed the young man’s company,
BATMAN: thumbsup
ROBIN: help

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Mostly, all these women ogling him embarrassed Clark. Grown women shouldn’t titter like gossiping schoolgirls whenever they walked by. It wasn’t as if his body was much different from most of the other men at the pool.
I’m assuming now he gets it how women feel like?
CLARK: I never ogle women!
WOMEN: :mycry:

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Perhaps he would be lucky and Jimmy would have returned from UNN and could join him, deflecting all the unwanted attention onto himself.
Later…
JIMMY: Hi, I’m Jimmy.
HOT CHICK: Huh? Oh. Right. Sooo…Claaaaarrrrrrrk…

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Knowing Lois, it must not have been progressing at all or she would have been hesitant to speak of anything else. Either that or it was progressing spectacularly and she wanted to keep all the acclaim to herself. One of the two.
laugh He could then read all about it in tomorrow’s paper?

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as the man could not fall lower than his dive off the penthouse balcony had taken him.
They could dilute his remains and poor him down the toilet?

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Perhaps that would discourage anyone else from trying to start up a conversation with him.
Maybe a torrid romance novel?

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Give me my sunlight and let me be!
He’s quite the grumpy vacationer.

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She had looked through her peephole first.
That’s quite the new habit she’s getting into, isn’t it?

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“I don’t know how many more dictionaries I can afford to give to the Metropolis Police Department with the word ‘Exclusive’ highlighted.”
laugh Maybe she could just print out the one page?

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and in enough quantities that we believe that the man who jumped from Luthor’s balcony wasn’t fully human.
LOIS: I *knew* it! Lex was a pig!

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“It couldn’t be a mask, like the one of my face we found in the safe, because… well, I’m sure that would have been a dead giveaway. Pardon my pun.”
Maybe if he pulled the mask off mid-fall and aimed his face for the pavement? The mask could even have some combustible aids added to it?

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“Enough to verify he had been shot in his left shoulder within the last six months,” he said.
Ooooh! Ooooh! I know! I know! Pick me! Pick me!

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“That’s only because the clone was my date on the night the terrorists took over the Daily Planet,” Lois said. “Luthor, the real Lex Luthor wasn’t there.”
She does realize that she sounds like one of her more loony sources, right?

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Lois glowered, wishing that Henderson would be more frank and open about what he knew, because if he did she would finally have the source in the MPD that she deserved.
She’s like one of those spy-handlers from the cold war. Building up a source until the source believes helping his handler is more important than his job. His country. Maybe even his family.

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She was tempted to tell him that it was merely an assumption she had made after reading Jurassic Park.
You’ve not suggesting that the writers of the clone-argh got their idea from that movie, are you?

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If she didn’t already know that upon telling Henderson this so-called ‘truth’, she would’ve lost his respect, it would have been worth it just to see his shocked expression.
It’s called book-smarts? And what will they say when Superman collects a stray T-Rex from Madison Avenue?

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“I never said that I kept them out of the loop. Besides, if I had told you, you would have zipped up quicker than a couple of teenagers necking on a couch when a car pulls in the drive,” he replied.
laugh You already considering buying an e-car for when your little ones reach that age?

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“That’s sick, Henderson,” Lois said, betting he wouldn’t have used such an analogy with her partner.
Because Lois is the mothering type?

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“You had this information and you sat on it?” he sputtered.
Duh!

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“Weren’t you the first person to meet Superman?” Henderson asked.
Hence the requirement for taking her flying. Thus, she could verify the truth of the statement.

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“You’re not invited, by the way. FBI’s orders. No civilians allowed,” he returned. “Too dangerous.”
Maybe they should throw down some grenades?

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Although, Luthor was social man.
Is that billionaire for being a player?

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How long could he stay underground all by himself?
Hence the harem.

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“I… that’s not… it…” she stammered, before finally putting her hands on her hips. “How in the hell do you know about us?”
laugh Although I did expect her to sputter how Superman would never kill a person.

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“Well, my answer is still ‘no’,” Lois said. Once Clark was back in town, she would have all the protection she would ever need, and then some.
CLARK: hyper She’s fine with the cast-iron cage I have made for her!

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I was loco for April Stephens, though.”

Clark smiled. If April Stephens could only see you now. “So, how does it feel to be a celebrity?”
Maybe she’d go after him now?
JENNY: wave
Oh, right.

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Jimmy looked up from his hands. “If I’m famous for knowing Superman, how will I know that they admire me for my actual work or for hanging off his cape?”
Maybe Lois could be of some advice to that?

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Clark wasn’t as convinced, since he knew Superman had tagged along on all of their cases, maybe not overtly, but definitely covertly.
Maybe he could do a book? Lane and Kent – Super Frauds

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When the Daily Planet building had been boarded up after the bombing, its parking garage had been deemed ‘unsafe’ by LexCorp’s engineers. It appeared sound to her.
What about that pack of sex offenders nesting in the corner over there next to the elevators?

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She pulled the large ring of keys from her briefcase, looked at the sheer number of them, and dropped them back into her bag. Next, she pulled out her lock picks and opened the door that way.
rotflol

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Two doors down was Perry’s office, locked up and entirely too quiet. She almost expected him to stomp out and start yelling at everyone to get off their collective fannies and get back to work. It had been in there that she had seen Clark for the first time and called him ‘Chuck.’
So, the building’s dead, then? No living soul left? Will she find Ralph’s half-decayed body in a stall in the men’s bathroom?

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Lois, on the other hand, had covered enough fires to know that many of the older buildings were built to more sturdily than the newer ones and, therefore, could withstand fires better.
Maybe the fire marshals didn’t know that?

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A dial tone.

***End of Part 187***
She going to phone Perry? Or that nice billionaire she met over in Gotham City? John Wayne? Bruce Sprinsteen. Something like that.

wave Michael


Join us on the #loisclark Discord server! We talk about fanfic, our favorite show, life, and more! (It’s almost like the IRC days of old again!)

I go by Michael on the Archives.
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Posts: 9,509
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Darth Michael: Sorry to hear about you being sick. I hope you're feeling better now. Thank you for filling my inbox. smile1
Originally Posted by Darth Michael
Originally Posted by Wrong Clark 187
Lois took a deep breath before stepping off the elevator. She had just come from a perplexing interview at EPRAD, which hadn’t gone down in the way she thought it would. No, not at all.
/dizzy/ We’ve just been in Vegas!
Hmmm. Perhaps "gone down" wasn't the correct phrase to use here. Also, Lois wasn't in Vegas.
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WELLS: /wave/
huh What's he doing here?
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LOIS: No, you stupid! I’m just interviewing for the PR staff position at EPRAD. Girl’s got to eat and it’s either that or working in the middle of LFI magazine.
CLARK: You mean the centerfold position?
LOIS: Oh, shut up! I already said that I’m taking the PR gig.
Oh, not a hiring interview. A reporter / businessman interview. You know, since it was just announced publicly that Luthor faked the Nightfall disaster by screwing up EPRAD's computers.

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She taken the job before she realized that being in PR means being nice to other reporters?
Maybe she turned them down and was regretting it.

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LEX: I believe they’re called ‘reasons’.
POtato. PAtato.

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Oh, and here I thought it was because of Bender bending the law.
No, it was a reference to all lawyers... not just the ones working for criminals.

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Well…it would be convenient?
But out of all the people in the world to hide out with, why Bender? Why his lawyer? dizzy

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Because Mayson hasn’t yet consummated her lust with Clark?
Because in pre-Another Lois, they were best friends (Mayson died right before Another Lois began.) Also, Clark hasn't met Mayson yet.

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Wouldn’t they send a pizza delivery boy to bring her the summons?
BENDER: That's Plan B.

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Plus, he might not be back in his room yet. Cathouses are usually open throughout the night. I’d assume…
LOIS: Cat often came to the office straight from work.
CLARK: /straightening his tie and swallowing nervously/ Probably best not to make jokes like that while I'm still vulnerable.

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So, they’re giving control to the *lawyers*?
Well, with all of LexCorp senior management under indictment...

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A dash of ink might liven up the temporal clase.
Oh, sorry. /Cleans monitor/ Oh. Lookie there. I didn't add a comma after all. Silly me. blush

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He signed her over to some Mid-Eastern sheik he thought deserved a go at his bed bunny?
Kal-El? /I know, I know. Old joke/

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Oh. Right. But she said *noooooo!* *NEVER!* And ‘you go and shove that ring where it will never be found safe by a proctologist’.
Which is why Luthor had to have signed the paperwork BEFORE the wedding. He was a bit busy running from the law afterwards. If Henderson, FBI, and MPD hadn't been after Lex, I'm sure he would have remembered to tear up the paperwork, but since he didn't... it went through. Gee, I hope that doesn't come back to bite Bender on where he sits. [Linked Image]

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He was hoping to get some special birthday nookie from his new bride due to the joyous occasion, thus making the honeymoon video much more entertaining to watch?
CLARK: /sick/
Oh, was it Lex's birthday, too? Shame, huh?

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Like Lex jumping out of a Jumping-Jack box?
LOIS: /looks around Bender's office eying every piece of large furniture suspiciously/

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Oh. An *honest* thief!
BENDER: Of course!
EW: Um... Bender, you have something brown on your nose.

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But since she can’t afford to rebuild it…Maybe she could get the money from her husband by offering him sexual favors?
Which is how he expected his wife to decide to do her marital responsibilities with a little more vigor.

Originally Posted by Darth Michael
Originally Posted by Wrong Clark 187
She didn’t even want to think what the sick bastard would have required her to do to get the money.
ER: /Has an idea what Lex would have wanted her to do/ /whispers idea to EW/
EW: /points to her explanation above which agrees with ER's guess/
ER: /that could have been fun, yes?/
LEX: [Linked Image]
LOIS: No.
CLARK: No.

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Which reminds me…What about property taxes. And is there a gift-tax in the US? Over here, if you receive property of any sort of significant value from anyone but the closest of family, the state collects 10% or 15% (I think) of the value.
Well, that's cruel.
LEX: Here, darling, I have something for you! A huge tax bill! Love ya, got to run.
EW: So what's the value of a defunct company and a burnt out building, nowadays?

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What she earns on her back should in no way reflect what she does while standing up.
RANDY GOODE: lol

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And since it’s mostly the reporters who are living meager lives, I’m assuming they’re the only ones not smart enough to exploit every loophole there is?
Perhaps Lois is more ethical than other reporters. Perhaps she takes her job in the fourth estate seriously and isn't in it for the financial gain.
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LINDA: Ooooh! I finally have 6 zeros on my bank account balance. Nice! Let’s see, what’s next…
On the other hand... Not all reporters care about these things.

Originally Posted by Michael
Originally Posted by Wrong Clark 187
A shadow fell over his body and Clark opened his eyes behind his sunglasses. “Yes?”
Jimmy? Or some hot blonde?
clap Good guess!

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Ooooh! A hot blonde.
JIMMY: The best kind. laugh

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She hoping he might rub her with sun lotion?
Yes, in a round about manner. First, she would apply the suntan lotion to him, and then he'd rub his body against hers.
CLARK: My, is that the time? [Linked Image]

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Oh, she’s hoping to rub *him* with sun lotion.
HOT BLONDE: It’s like a Chippendale’s show!
ER: /has ideas on exactly where Stephanie wants to apply the lotion/
CLARK: shock But I'm not even in the suit!
STEPHANIE: Good idea. Take it off!

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She never met a gay guy, then?
STEPH: I have.
STEPH: Gay guys. Those are just the ones who haven't seen me naked, right? All the others have come to their senses.

Originally Posted by Michael
Originally Posted by Wrong Clark 187
“Yes. I need to buy my girlfriend a gift. Our anniversary is coming up,” he said.
Subtle.
CANON CLARK: Why would he lie? I never lied like that to Mayson…
Who says alt-Clark is lying? Didn't Jenny suggest that he buy Lois a gift? evil

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No, I think their intentions are of a rather dubious nature.
Strange thing. That's what my betas said as well. But, you see, Clark's a bit more glass is full (because I really didn't want it filled up to the rim) kind of guy.
LOIS: You mean 'delusionally naive'?
JIMMY: Well, he loves you, doesn't he? peep
JIMBO: The real reason Jimmy leaves Metropolis.

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They’re not invading. They just want some happens-in-Vegas-stays-in-Vegas time with him.
CLARK: But I don't!

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He could wear a wedding band?
CLARK: Wouldn't that be lying?
EW: He could kiss Jimmy on the lips when he arrives back from his interview.
JIMMY: Hey, man. That's a double edge sword.

Originally Posted by Michael
Originally Posted by Wrong Clark 187
Actually, he had enjoyed the young man’s company,
BATMAN: /totally recommends the lifestyle/
ROBIN: /suggests he assist Jimbo escape and they can hide out in the wilderness together/
BATMAN: Oh, look. Robin is playing hide and seek again.
ROBIN: No, just hide.

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I’m assuming now he gets it how women feel like?
CLARK: I never ogle women!
WOMEN: /crying/
RALPH: Okay, Kent. You take the men, I'll ogle the women!

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Later…
JIMMY: Hi, I’m Jimmy.
HOT CHICK: Huh? Oh. Right. Sooo…Claaaaarrrrrrrk…
LOIS: See. Delusionally naive.
CLARK: I don't understand it. Jimmy's looks just like me. /points to network's decision to change Jimmys after S1/
LOIS: And people say that *I* have vision problems.

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He could then read all about it in tomorrow’s paper?
What paper?
CLARK: /lifts up copy of DP off stands/ Uh, Jimmy. How long have we been in Vegas?
JIMMY: /sighs as another beautiful woman passes by/ Who cares?

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They could dilute his remains and poor him down the toilet?
LOIS: I like this plan! thumbsup

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Maybe a torrid romance novel?
CLARK: I was thinking something a bit lighter, like War and Peace or David Copperfield.
VEGAS WOMEN: Ew. He's a geek. Look what he's reading.

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He’s quite the grumpy vacationer.
Well, he did leave his bed bunny back at home.

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That’s quite the new habit she’s getting into, isn’t it?
Perhaps. [Linked Image]

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Maybe she could just print out the one page?
LOIS: Like I really buy them a dictionary. It was a metaphor.

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LOIS: I *knew* it! Lex was a pig!
notworthy lol

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Maybe if he pulled the mask off mid-fall and aimed his face for the pavement? The mask could even have some combustible aids added to it?
That's just sick!
LEX: Brilliant! Think of all the money I could have saved on clones.

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Ooooh! Ooooh! I know! I know! Pick me! Pick me!
He shot someone else? He had Hellar burn someone else to look as if he had been shot?

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She does realize that she sounds like one of her more loony sources, right?
HENDERSON: But the guy had frog DNA, so it's hard to use that reasoning.

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She’s like one of those spy-handlers from the cold war. Building up a source until the source believes helping his handler is more important than his job. His country. Maybe even his family.
LOIS: Helping me IS the most important part of any sources' job.

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You’ve not suggesting that the writers of the clone-argh got their idea from that movie, are you?
That's possible, too. I just like the book and movie and tend to mention it once or twice in my stories, since it was timely back then. smile

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It’s called book-smarts? And what will they say when Superman collects a stray T-Rex from Madison Avenue?
Usually book smarts come from non-fiction and not fictional stories.
LOIS: But Crichton does lots of research!
AUDIENCE: Crossover! Love it!
EW: It really would have made JP2 more fun (and believable), if Superman had showed up in San Diego, don't you think?

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You already considering buying an e-car for when your little ones reach that age?
hyper I'll be let out of the house without the kids someday?

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Because Lois is the mothering type?
And can handle the sexual reference better than Clark who just sputters and blushes whenever sex is mentioned?

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Hence the requirement for taking her flying. Thus, she could verify the truth of the statement.
Well, she has a reputation for not believing her eyes.

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Maybe they should throw down some grenades?
What if Lex took hostages?

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Is that billionaire for being a player?
BRUCE: So what does it mean that the JLA keeps calling me anti-social?
GREEN ARROW: That you're doing it wrong, man.

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Hence the harem.
LEX: [Linked Image]

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Although I did expect her to sputter how Superman would never kill a person.
LOIS: Geeze. You leak Superman's secret identity once and you're scarred for life.
CLARK: Once?

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CLARK: /hyper/ She’s fine with the cast-iron cage I have made for her!
LOIS: My, it's awfully *hot* in this cage. /starts to remove clothing/
CLARK: I can fix that! /blows freezing breath in the room/
LOIS: Claaaark. Now, I'm cold. Can you warm me up? And don't use heat vision as I'll get burned by the hot bars.
CLARK: help

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Maybe she’d go after him now?
JENNY: /wave/
Oh, right.
Isn't it better to rub it in April's face that he's no longer interested in her now that he's a celebrity himself?

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Maybe Lois could be of some advice to that?
LOIS: If it earns me trophies, I don't care what anyone thinks.
EW: Okay, maybe not Lois...

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Maybe he could do a book? Lane and Kent – Super Frauds
LOIS: EX-cuse me. *I'm * not a fraud!

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What about that pack of sex offenders nesting in the corner over there next to the elevators?
LOIS: Oh, EW cut the scene where I flea bombed the place before walking in.

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So, the building’s dead, then? No living soul left? Will she find Ralph’s half-decayed body in a stall in the men’s bathroom?
We *haven't* heard from Ralph since the DP's demise, have we? [Linked Image]

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Maybe the fire marshals didn’t know that?
Or maybe Luthor bought them off?

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She going to phone Perry? Or that nice billionaire she met over in Gotham City? John Wayne? Bruce Sprinsteen. Something like that.
All good guesses. Who would she want to talk to without Luthor or the Feds listening? Also, I think John Wayne was dead already by 1994. Sorry, she didn't bring Star with her.


VirginiaR.
"On the long road, take small steps." -- Jor-el, "The Foundling"
---
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Thank you for filling my inbox.
You’re welcome! I did have three parts to catch up, plus 189 jump

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Also, Lois wasn't in Vegas.
Yeah, but you ended with Jimmy in Vegas, so the cut was…unexpected?

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Oh, not a hiring interview. A reporter / businessman interview.
I know. The alt-story is funnier, though?

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Maybe she turned them down and was regretting it.
Like she now regrets not marrying Lex Luthor?

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But out of all the people in the world to hide out with, why Bender? Why his lawyer?
Who knows good hookers with low standards?

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Because in pre-Another Lois, they were best friends
[Linked Image]

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CLARK: /straightening his tie and swallowing nervously/ Probably best not to make jokes like that while I'm still vulnerable.
laugh But they’re much more fun that way!

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Quote:
He signed her over to some Mid-Eastern sheik he thought deserved a go at his bed bunny?
Kal-El? /I know, I know. Old joke/
laugh No, I was going literal…

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Gee, I hope that doesn't come back to bite Bender on where he sits.
clap

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Quote:
Like Lex jumping out of a Jumping-Jack box?
LOIS: /looks around Bender's office eying every piece of large furniture suspiciously/
rotflol

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EW: Um... Bender, you have something brown on your nose.
laugh

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Which is how he expected his wife to decide to do her marital responsibilities with a little more vigor.
Oh. Right. Duh!

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EW: So what's the value of a defunct company and a burnt out building, nowadays?
Midtown property? I’d say upper two-digit millions at least?

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Perhaps Lois is more ethical than other reporters. Perhaps she takes her job in the fourth estate seriously and isn't in it for the financial gain.
That why she’s broke and has to pad her paycheck by working at the Metro Club?

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STEPH: Gay guys. Those are just the ones who haven't seen me naked, right? All the others have come to their senses.
[Linked Image]

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Who says alt-Clark is lying? Didn't Jenny suggest that he buy Lois a gift?
About the anniversary?

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JIMMY: Well, he loves you, doesn't he? /about to die/
JIMBO: The real reason Jimmy leaves Metropolis.
Lois?

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CLARK: But I don't!
CHICKS: confused

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CLARK: Wouldn't that be lying?
EW: He could kiss Jimmy on the lips when he arrives back from his interview.
JIMMY: Hey, man. That's a double edge sword.
rotflol

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CLARK: I don't understand it. Jimmy's looks just like me. /points to network's decision to change Jimmys after S1/
clap

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LOIS: And people say that *I* have vision problems.
PENNY: James Bartholomew Olson. Superman!

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CLARK: I was thinking something a bit lighter, like War and Peace or David Copperfield.
VEGAS WOMEN: Ew. He's a geek. Look what he's reading.
laugh

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Quote:
He’s quite the grumpy vacationer.
Well, he did leave his bed bunny back at home.
LOIS: *Excuse* me? Bedbunny? I wish! mecry

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Quote:
Maybe she could just print out the one page?
LOIS: Like I really buy them a dictionary. It was a metaphor.
Oh. My bad.

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Quote:
Ooooh! Ooooh! I know! I know! Pick me! Pick me!
He shot someone else? He had Hellar burn someone else to look as if he had been shot?
No!

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LOIS: Helping me IS the most important part of any sources' job.
She’s quite full of herself, isn’t she?

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Usually book smarts come from non-fiction and not fictional stories.
LOIS: But Crichton does lots of research!
AUDIENCE: Crossover! Love it!
[Linked Image]

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EW: It really would have made JP2 more fun (and believable), if Superman had showed up in San Diego, don't you think?
[Linked Image]

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Quote:
You already considering buying an e-car for when your little ones reach that age?
hyper I'll be let out of the house without the kids someday?
rotflol

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And can handle the sexual reference better than Clark who just sputters and blushes whenever sex is mentioned?
laugh

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What if Lex took hostages?
Umm…

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LOIS: Geeze. You leak Superman's secret identity once and you're scarred for life.
CLARK: Once?
laugh
LOIS: Cat already knew when I told her!

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LOIS: My, it's awfully *hot* in this cage. /starts to remove clothing/
CLARK: I can fix that! /blows freezing breath in the room/
LOIS: Claaaark. Now, I'm cold. Can you warm me up? And don't use heat vision as I'll get burned by the hot bars.
CLARK: /doesn’t like the idea of a naked Lois who’s freezing/
laugh

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Isn't it better to rub it in April's face that he's no longer interested in her now that he's a celebrity himself?
Might hit her ego, though. And there’s nothing worse than a depressed model. She might start eating again.

Quote
Quote:
Maybe he could do a book? Lane and Kent – Super Frauds
LOIS: EX-cuse me. *I'm * not a fraud!
CLARK: Erm…Lois? What about *me*!
LOIS: You? You *are* a fraud. So shush it!

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Quote:
What about that pack of sex offenders nesting in the corner over there next to the elevators?
LOIS: Oh, EW cut the scene where I flea bombed the place before walking in.
laugh

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We *haven't* heard from Ralph since the DP's demise, have we? /EW wonders where she buried that thread/
Oh dear.

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Quote:
Maybe the fire marshals didn’t know that?
Or maybe Luthor bought them off?
jawdrop

wave Michael


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Originally Posted by Darth Michael
EW: Also, Lois wasn't in Vegas.
ER: Yeah, but you ended with Jimmy in Vegas, so the cut was…unexpected?
But I jump back and forth between Metropolis and Las Vegas several times.

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I know. The alt-story is funnier, though?
It usually is. smile

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EW: Maybe she turned them down and was regretting it.
ER: Like she now regrets not marrying Lex Luthor?
LOIS: Don't regret that. And I'm not working for EPRAD.

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EW: But out of all the people in the world to hide out with, why Bender? Why his lawyer?
ER: Who knows good hookers with low standards?
BENDER: I may sell my soul to Luthor for $1000/hr but not my body.
LEX: Even dead men aren't that desperate.

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EW: Because in pre-Another Lois, they were best friends ER: /uh/
In Another Lois, Lois and Mayson were best friends before Mayson was killed (just before Lois wakes up in Part 1). Because they didn't have the rivalry about Clark, they became friends. evil Yep. I screwed with Lois's mind on that one.

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CLARK: /straightening his tie and swallowing nervously/ Probably best not to make jokes like that while I'm still vulnerable.
ER: But they’re much more fun that way!
[Linked Image]

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ER: He signed her over to some Mid-Eastern sheik he thought deserved a go at his bed bunny?
EW: Kal-El? /I know, I know. Old joke/
ER: No, I was going literal…
LOIS: That's not funny.
LEX: From a certain point of view... it is.

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EW: So what's the value of a defunct company and a burnt out building, nowadays?
ER: Midtown property? I’d say upper two-digit millions at least?
BENDER: Ooops.

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EW: Perhaps Lois is more ethical than other reporters. Perhaps she takes her job in the fourth estate seriously and isn't in it for the financial gain.
ER: That why she’s broke and has to pad her paycheck by working at the Metro Club?
Nah, that's just for kicks.

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EW: Who says alt-Clark is lying? Didn't Jenny suggest that he buy Lois a gift?
ER: About the anniversary?
This is CLARK we're talking about here.
CLARK: It's the anniversary of the day Lois didn't call me a 'lunkhead'.
LOIS: I was out sick that day, and I *did* call you a lunkhead, I just did it from home.
CLARK: So, it was the anniversary of the day I kissed her goodbye the third time.

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JIMMY: Well, he loves you, doesn't he? /about to die/
JIMBO: The real reason Jimmy leaves Metropolis.
ER: Lois?
That's as good a reason as any.

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LOIS: And people say that *I* have vision problems.
PENNY: James Bartholomew Olson. Superman!
CANON CLARK: huh Yeah, I don't get that one either. Maybe people really *don't* look Superman in the face.

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ER: He’s quite the grumpy vacationer.
EW: Well, he did leave his bed bunny back at home.
LOIS: *Excuse* me? Bedbunny? I wish! /crying/
Oh, sorry. Snugglebunny?

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LOIS: Helping me IS the most important part of any sources' job.
ER: She’s quite full of herself, isn’t she?
CLARK: Um... I decline to answer that question on the grounds that my answer may lead to my death.

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LOIS: Geeze. You leak Superman's secret identity once and you're scarred for life.
CLARK: Once?
LOIS: Cat already knew when I told her!
CLARK: Lois, who else did you tell?
LOIS: [Linked Image] Nobody?
PERRY: wave

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EW: Isn't it better to rub it in April's face that he's no longer interested in her now that he's a celebrity himself?
ER: Might hit her ego, though. And there’s nothing worse than a depressed model. She might start eating again.
Oh. That's bad. clap

Quote
ER: Maybe he could do a book? Lane and Kent – Super Frauds
LOIS: EX-cuse me. *I'm * not a fraud!
CLARK: Erm…Lois? What about *me*!
LOIS: You? You *are* a fraud. So shush it!
What the reader doesn't know won't hurt 'em?

Quote
ER: Maybe the fire marshals didn’t know that?
EW: Or maybe Luthor bought them off?
ER: /surprised that Luthor would be that blatant/
Not directly. He would have had one of his underlings do it.
MRS. COX: wave


VirginiaR.
"On the long road, take small steps." -- Jor-el, "The Foundling"
---
"clearly there is a lack of understanding between those two... he speaks Lunkheadanian and she Stubbornanian" -- chelo.
Joined: Apr 2007
Posts: 9,066
Likes: 31
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Quote
But I jump back and forth between Metropolis and Las Vegas several times.
Yeah…I guess so…for the oddest reason, it jumped at it. Might be that I was tired…

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ER: Like she now regrets not marrying Lex Luthor?
LOIS: Don't regret that.
LEX: We’ll see about that. devil

Quote
Quote:
EW: But out of all the people in the world to hide out with, why Bender? Why his lawyer?
ER: Who knows good hookers with low standards?
BENDER: I may sell my soul to Luthor for $1000/hr but not my body.
LEX: Even dead men aren't that desperate.
No, I thought maybe Bender could recommend good hookers with low standards to his recently liquefied boss.

Quote
Yep. I screwed with Lois's mind on that one.
LOIS: [Linked Image] I’m always getting screwed. And not in the good way!
LEX: I did offer, darling. If you care to remember.
CLARK: *LALALALALALALALA* I don’t remember. *LALALALALALALA*

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Quote:
CLARK: /straightening his tie and swallowing nervously/ Probably best not to make jokes like that while I'm still vulnerable.
ER: But they’re much more fun that way!
EW: /agrees on that one/
CLARK: help

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ER: That why she’s broke and has to pad her paycheck by working at the Metro Club?
Nah, that's just for kicks.
[Linked Image] ?

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LOIS: I was out sick that day, and I *did* call you a lunkhead, I just did it from home.
CLARK: So, it was the anniversary of the day I kissed her goodbye the third time.
He not got any standards, does he?

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JIMBO: The real reason Jimmy leaves Metropolis.
ER: Lois?
That's as good a reason as any.
CROOKS: [Linked Image]

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LOIS: *Excuse* me? Bedbunny? I wish! /crying/
Oh, sorry. Snugglebunny?
LOIS: grumble Rub salt in it, will ya?

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CLARK: Lois, who else did you tell?
LOIS: <realizes she’s worse than Diana and Tempus combined> Nobody?
PERRY: <Just one of the supermarket of people she told. This year.>
laugh

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ER: Might hit her ego, though. And there’s nothing worse than a depressed model. She might start eating again.
Oh. That's bad. clap
Thank you.

Quote
What the reader doesn't know won't hurt 'em?
LEX: What I always say. Which is why I always go for full disclosure in the bedroom.

Quote
Not directly. He would have had one of his underlings do it.
MRS. COX: <likes to be underneath Lex>
I’m guessing, she wouldn’t have liked it during his supposedly final moments, though.

wave Michael


Join us on the #loisclark Discord server! We talk about fanfic, our favorite show, life, and more! (It’s almost like the IRC days of old again!)

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Posts: 9,509
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Originally Posted by Darth Michael
Quote
ER: Like she now regrets not marrying Lex Luthor?
LOIS: Don't regret that.
LEX: We’ll see about that. devil
LOIS: /glances between Lex and Clark/ Nope. Can't see that happening.

Quote
EW: But out of all the people in the world to hide out with, why Bender? Why his lawyer?
ER: Who knows good hookers with low standards?
BENDER: I may sell my soul to Luthor for $1000/hr but not my body.
LEX: Even dead men aren't that desperate.
ER: No, I thought maybe Bender could recommend good hookers with low standards to his recently liquefied boss.
No hookers have that low of standards.

Quote
EW: Yep. I screwed with Lois's mind on that one.
LOIS: [Linked Image] I’m always getting screwed. And not in the good way!
LEX: I did offer, darling. If you care to remember.
CLARK: *LALALALALALALALA* I don’t remember. *LALALALALALALA*
LOIS: I said "in the good way", Lex. /glances at Clark/ What's wrong with him?

Quote
ER: That why she’s broke and has to pad her paycheck by working at the Metro Club?
Nah, that's just for kicks.
ER: /these kinds?/[Linked Image] ?
LOIS: Nah. I can get those with Lex.

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He not got any standards, does he?
That's what a guy gets when he only wants one type of woman.

Quote
What the reader doesn't know won't hurt 'em?
LEX: What I always say. Which is why I always go for full disclosure in the bedroom.
WOMEN LEAVING LEX'S BEDROOM: I don't know. I could see when I entered, but then he got undressed and it was so horrifying I lost my sight.


VirginiaR.
"On the long road, take small steps." -- Jor-el, "The Foundling"
---
"clearly there is a lack of understanding between those two... he speaks Lunkheadanian and she Stubbornanian" -- chelo.
Joined: Apr 2007
Posts: 9,066
Likes: 31
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Quote
LEX: We’ll see about that. devil
LOIS: /glances between Lex and Clark/ Nope. Can't see that happening.
What if Lex kidnaps Lucy instead to teach her sister a lesson?

Quote
CLARK: *LALALALALALALALA* I don’t remember. *LALALALALALALA*
LOIS: I said "in the good way", Lex. /glances at Clark/ What's wrong with him?
He’s gone too long without nookie and finally snapped.

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That's what a guy gets when he only wants one type of woman.
The difficult type peep
LOIS: Clark doesn’t want me? mecry
MAYSON: I’m not difficult. confused I’m really *easy*!

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WOMEN LEAVING LEX'S BEDROOM: I don't know. I could see when I entered, but then he got undressed and it was so horrifying I lost my sight.
rotflol Isn’t there a snake venom that can blind you when it gets into your eyes?

wave Michael


Join us on the #loisclark Discord server! We talk about fanfic, our favorite show, life, and more! (It’s almost like the IRC days of old again!)

I go by Michael on the Archives.

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