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#260056 12/18/14 10:38 PM
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Sue S. Offline OP
Kerth
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Kerth
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Thoughts? Holiday wishes? Or maybe you'd like to share your favorite Elvis song?


Lois: You know, I have a funny feeling that you didn't tell me your biggest secret.

Clark: Well, just to put your little mind at ease, Lois, you're right.
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Kerth
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Yea! You posted this! clap
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My deepest thanks to Susan (groobie) for catching my mistakes, for always being enthusiastic, and for being unfailingly awesome.
Awwww, shucks! blush Thanks! It's so cool to see the work in progress, and then the revisions that are made to the final product. Honestly, it's my absolute pleasure to be part of the process.

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She opened the door as far as the security chain would allow.
It's amazing how such a small detail brought me right back to season 1 Lois.

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"So have you talked to him? Superman?"

Clark didn't answer; instead he ducked his head and sighed.

"I'm not asking if you got the story," she whispered, touching his arm. "I'm asking because he should have someone to talk to, you know?"

"That would be nice." Clark's head bowed and his next words were barely a whisper. "Lois, I'm scared."

See, this is perfect. He's not going to lie to her - I know what he came here to do. That sigh, his first person admission (even though Lois doesn't recognize what he's doing) - it's enough for me to glimpse his state of mind.

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The thought skittered through her brain that the time Clark had laid a kiss on her in the honeymoon suite of the Luxor hadn't been a fluke -- it had been a tease. No one had ever kissed her like this, not even Superman under the influence of that pheromone perfume.

Squeeeee! clap You go get what's yours, girl! grin

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He was leaving her for the entire planet. It was completely selfless and she hated him for it.
LOL...I really love this!

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Clark nodded. "There aren't many options. If I do nothing, everyone dies. If I can nudge Nightfall from its trajectory then everyone and everything I love is still around the next day. If it comes down to my being dead either way, at least I--"
Well, way to be a Mister Gloomy Pants, Clark!

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She picked up Clark's glasses and a fresh, even sharper, wave of guilt swept over her. This was exactly why he hadn't told her before now -- he'd known what her reaction was going to be. That made it worse, somehow. Even knowing the risk that she'd be furious with him, Clark had still come here tonight and told her the truth.
Yeah, Lois should feel guilty, but I do appreciate that she recognizes that fact so quickly. Gives her time to do something about it. wink

Loved Lois' persistence at EPRAD. thumbsup Can't wait to see how you decided to resolve the whole thing in part 2. smile


You can find my stories as Groobie on the nfic archives and Susan Young on the gfic archives. In other words, you know me as Groobie. wink
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Yay! Another Sue story! Love,love,love this. I can feel the angst rolling off both Lois and Clark in this part. Lois, hurt from being lied to and only understanding after Clark left what she'll lose. And Clark, looking for understanding and companionship. Also, finally come clean and lay himself bare to the woman that he loves. So many things lay between them that may forever be denied. Especially, if Nightfall truly ends everything before it really even begins. I can't wait for the second part. Although, you did have me a bit worried when Corporal Oliver said Superman wasn't there. For a few seconds I thought Clark was being stubborn and pigheaded. Then it dawned on me, just like Lois of where he would go. (Unless he's somewhere licking his wounds). Bring on the next part. Also, maybe another Kleenex too. smile Sarah

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Fantastic! You handle conveying emotions so well.

I'm surprised that Lois isn't planning to call Clark's parents to try to speak to him. If she didn't already have their number from her visit there, it would be easy enough for her to find it. Yeah, the talk with Jonathan or Martha might well be awkward, but under the circumstances, I'd think that she would deem it worth it.

Of course, there's always the possibility that Oliver is lying and Clark really is at Eprad, but I rather doubt it. After all, the Kent farm was the first place that I had thought he would be, even before his apartment. (Of course, I have an advantage Lois didn't have: I saw ASU.)

I'm looking forward to seeing how this story turns out. Do you have any idea when you'll be posting part two?

Joy,
Lynn

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Pushing the asteroid off its path -- a much more realistic option! And I really liked Clark's thought process, that if he's going to end up dead either way, the only option is to save everyone else first. He's so scared (poor Clark!) yet it's really the only answer. The mark of a true hero, willing to make the ultimate sacrifice.

I wanted to shake Lois when she got mad at him (even if it was perfectly in character) and was glad when she realized what she'd done -- how he'd confessed his fear and she'd sent him away -- just a minute too late. If she doesn't find him to apologize, it's going to be a heavy burden to bear, that she rejected him in his final hours.

Looking forward to part 2!

Kathy

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I like this alternate take on the episode. Their reactions were very believable. I’m looking forward to seeing where you go in part 2!

120,000 mph is about 33 miles/sec; at that speed, it has to be coming from outside the solar system.

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LMA Offline
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Can I consider this a birthday present? wink...

What a nice surprise to find this story today clap.

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Not that a knock on her door ever presaged a social call. She had no social life, unless you wanted to count the occasional pizza and a movie on Clark Kent's couch.

I very much enjoyed how honest Lois is with herself.

But also... Lois, an occasional pizza/movie on Clark Kent's couch sounds like a pretty amazing way to spend an evening grin.

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If he had been anyone else, she would have turned him down. But Clark had seen her in pajamas before, and he definitely seemed upset about something. Lois shut the door to unlatch the chain, and then opened it again.

"Sure, why not? You've come this far." Lois stepped back to let him inside

Even this part--which wasn't really WAFFy--but showed so much comfort and familiarity, really got my attention. That friendship--it is so much of everything, isn't it? Great way to illustrate notworthy.

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His body rocked slightly as if he wanted to pace, but was glued to that spot.

"Okay, seriously, what's up?" Lois sat down on the sofa opposite him, her head tilted slightly as she tried, and failed, to read him.

I tell you...those little details, they really do make all the difference! His body rocking back and forth--that detail added a lot. Also, IMO, just putting the 'seriously' into Lois' question--it made what she was saying sound real. You are really great at writing how people actually 'talk' (if that makes sense dizzy ).

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Lois would have called his bluff, but he looked dead serious. "Who's your source?"

He looked at his hands again, clenching them so tightly that his knuckles turned white. "Dr. Daitch at EPRAD. General Zeitlin. Secretary Cosgrove."

Her jaw nearly dropped in disbelief. "You spoke to all of them personally?"

He nodded. "Yes."

"When?" she demanded.

"About an hour ago. They asked me to meet them."

"And you didn't invite me?" Lois smacked his shoulder in frustration. "Clark, what the hell does 'partners' mean to you? What did they say?"

She saw the muscles of his jaw twitch before he answered. "We have four days until Nightfall makes a direct hit."

This part--I really enjoyed how Lois is approaching the conversation (obviously) in work-mode (as Clark as her partner), and Clark is being completely honest, telling her what happened (pretty much as Superman).

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"No, it's not. Not yet." He gave her a tremulous smile. "You're right, of course."

"I'm always right."

He let out a small laugh that was almost a sigh. "Not always. Just most of the time."

Friendship (sighing). Their's really is so beautiful. I love these little showcases of it twins.

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"I'm asking because he should have someone to talk to, you know?"

"That would be nice." Clark's head bowed and his next words were barely a whisper. "Lois, I'm scared."

Lois grabbed his hand and squeezed it hard. "Don't say that. If you fall apart, then I will, too.

He needs her SO MUCH right here. And showing his vulnerablility--'Lois, I'm scared'--that was so direct, so right where he is at that moment. I LOVED that!

I might as well highlight the whole story, the way that I'm going...but anyway:

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"It's an act," she admitted. "It's all an act! I'm scared of just about everything. Spiders, snakes, loud noises, the dark, being alone -- all of it."

He gave her a wan smile. "I don't believe you. You're just saying that to make me feel better."

"Is it working?"

"Yeah." His hand moved to loosely intertwine his fingers with hers. "There's so much I should have told you. There's so much I've wanted to tell you. I just… I assumed there was plenty of time. That there would be some perfect day when everything aligned exactly right and I'd tell you everything

Toe-curlingly sweet. I love how much Lois is trying. I love how much you can tell Clark is grasping onto that. It's very touching. And entwining the fingers--that's a big one for me...so sweet.

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She heard his breath catch. "I love you," she told him again, her eyes shining with unshed tears. "I realized it when you were going to leave the Planet and go back to Kansas. I didn't want you to go, and it wasn't just because I was going to miss working with you."

His eyes met hers and she saw the haunted look leave them, replaced by a warm happiness. Just as quickly, though, the joy faded and he seemed even sadder. His hand tightened a little on hers. "I fell in love with you that first day in Perry's office."

Her eyebrows shot up in surprise. "Really? Love at first sight?"

It's all definitely out there. Yippee! dance

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Suddenly his lips were on hers. His arms closed around her, one hand tipping her head back to rest in his palm as his mouth moved against hers again and again. His kiss was gentle, and yet there was an urgency to it, an intensity that built with each pull of his mouth on hers. The thought skittered through her brain that the time Clark had laid a kiss on her in the honeymoon suite of the Luxor hadn't been a fluke -- it had been a tease. No one had ever kissed her like this, not even Superman under the influence of that pheromone perfume

Yeah, Clark! I love how he went with his emotions, with what he wanted so badly to do. Didn't think, just acted. He's under so much stress--letting go for that brief moment. Giving into his feelings.

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He was leaving her for the entire planet. It was completely selfless and she hated him for it

Echoing Susan here. Loved this! Lois' honesty again with herself.

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The man currently standing in her living room couldn't possibly take on a space rock larger than Metropolis and survive.

This is what I'm worried about!

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"You're really going to do it, aren't you?" Her voice wavered and she hated him for that, too. Damn him for making her care -- really, truly, deeply care about someone.

Yep, Clark is officially 'in'--she cares, completely. grin

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Was I supposed to sleep with you first? Was that it?" Lois didn't believe for a moment that he'd come here for a quickie, but it felt good to see she could shock him as much as he had just shocked her.

His face flushed bright red. "You can't be serious!"

She's not. Just mad/scared/frustrated/in shock/etc/etc/etc... wink

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Lois stood at her kitchen island and stared at the glasses he'd left sitting on her coffee table.

The glasses left there sitting on the coffee table. Big impact. Clark leaving without glasses. That implies a LOT of upcoming 'scary' stuff--him not thinking he'll ever need them again.

So glad that Lois went after Clark...to his apartment, to EPRAD. Now to see what happens next! Can't wait! hyper hyper hyper

Laura


Last edited by LMA; 12/20/14 02:47 AM.

"Where's Clark?" "Right here."

...two simple sentences--with so much meaning.

~Lois and Clark in 'House of Luthor'~
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Sue S. Offline OP
Kerth
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Wow! Look at this lovely, lovely feedback! It's like Christmas came early! clap

Susan - Aw, thanks! I'm very flattered. blush I'm also extremely grateful that you're willing to read the story repeatedly (and then yet again once it's posted).

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See, this is perfect. He's not going to lie to her - I know what he came here to do. That sigh, his first person admission (even though Lois doesn't recognize what he's doing) - it's enough for me to glimpse his state of mind.
Thanks! That was the germ of an idea that started this whole story, the idea of Clark coming to confess the truth about Superman, but ending up confessing just how frightened he was. I couldn't resist the poignancy of Lois wanting to comfort Superman, not knowing that she already is.

Sarah - I'm not sure, no matter how hurt he was, Clark would be petty enough to completely avoid her. Especially if there was the possibility of not returning. I'm so glad you're reading along!

Lynn - Thank you! I'm exceedingly pleased that the emotions are working for you. I actually did toy with the idea of having Lois call the Kents, but it made the story feel cluttered to me. Also, the conversation between Clark and Lois ended up being awkward and devolved to accusations, so I cut it and went in a different direction. smile I plan to post the second half next week, probably right after Christmas.

Kathy - shock I'm rather agog that you're reading my story! And I'm ecstatic that you agree with me about the option to push Nightfall off course. laugh Thank you for the compliment on characterization. That means a great deal to me, especially coming from an author I admire so much. (I have "Winter Wonderland" earmarked to dive into over the break -- can't wait!)

Debbie - Thank you! Having him blow up the asteroid always bugged me (along with a couple of other little details that I'll "fix" in the next half). I started this story as a snippet back in 2009, then forgot about it until last year when I came across an article about a possible asteroid impact on Mars. It estimated 120,000 mph as 55 km/second. If you're interested, this was the article: Mars Impact

Laura - Ha! Yes, consider this an early birthday present. laugh I'm with you about the occasional pizza and a movie on Clark's couch sounding like a perfect way to spend an evening.

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I tell you...those little details, they really do make all the difference! His body rocking back and forth--that detail added a lot. Also, IMO, just putting the 'seriously' into Lois' question--it made what she was saying sound real. You are really great at writing how people actually 'talk' (if that makes sense.)
The details *always* make a difference! I tend to write starting with their dialog, and I'll say it out loud, just to make sure that it sounds right. I guess that's why it sounds real to you. smile Once I have that, I'll start shading in the action, then I go over it again and add the details. And then again and again until it feels done.

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He needs her SO MUCH right here. And showing his vulnerablility--'Lois, I'm scared'--that was so direct, so right where he is at that moment. I LOVED that!
Me, too! laugh

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The glasses left there sitting on the coffee table. Big impact. Clark leaving without glasses. That implies a LOT of upcoming 'scary' stuff--him not thinking he'll ever need them again.
That, along with the fact that he told her the truth in the first place, just has to weigh on her. He honestly believes he isn't coming back. frown

Thank you so much, ladies! I very much appreciate your comments. sloppy


Lois: You know, I have a funny feeling that you didn't tell me your biggest secret.

Clark: Well, just to put your little mind at ease, Lois, you're right.
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Pulitzer
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Just caught up and eager for the next part. Really great stuff Sue.
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Artemis


History is easy once you've lived it. - Duncan MacLeod
Writing history is easy once you've lived it. - Artemis
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I have no idea how you'll be able to tie up all these loose strings in one more part, Sue. If you can, notworthy . Although, since most of us think of you as Sue notworthy S., it's certainly in the realm of believability.

I read this the other night and didn't comment before now for two reasons. Firstly, I needed to think about what jawdrop news she needed to call Perry about (stupid me, for some strange reason, I thought it had something to do about Clark's sudden holiday while the world was going to pot, i.e. CK=SM... not about the world going to pot, which I had forgotten wasn't *public* yet and that Clark had just informed her. wallbash You'd think, I'd have figured that out sooner, but my brain has been on hiatus all week.) Second reason, more understandable has something to do with lack of RL time and brainpower to do so. My apologies.

I love that Lois confessed to loving Clark (no "as a brother" here), before he could get out that he was in love with her... or that he was Superman. clap Kudos!

I agree that it was obvious to the rest of us where Clark had gone (as one other reader pointed out, we had bonus of having watched the episode). It makes sense though that Lois would still be thinking of Clark as Clark, not Superman. She hasn't see him DO anything Super. He didn't spin into the suit or disappear before her very eyes. So, she's thinking "where would Clark go" not "where would Clark go if he *could* fly (which he can)". Of course, once she figured it out, she slapped her forehead silly, Duh-ing herself.

The guy at EPRAD who denied her entrance asked a strange question though. He asked if she was alone. He only told the people in the back that Superman had female visitor (or something of the sort). My thoughts of this were that Superman could have been back there but expecting Clark's folks (hence a man and a woman). Now, that I think about this though, they could also be thinking, "only allow Lois Lane back if Clark Kent is with her", because Daitch likes Clark and not Lois. Probably the most obvious answer is the correct one. Clark went to Kansas and not to EPRAD after Lois made the mistake of kicking him out of her apartment. But if that were so, why ask if she was alone?

Other than that, ditto everything that Laura said, because she always notices all the wonderful nuances of your writing that I think while reading but forget once I get to commenting. So, thank you Laura, for once more taking the words out of my brain and saying it more eloquently than I could.

I'm still curious how you'll be able to tie up all these strings in one more part. I'm glad to hear that we'll find out the answer before 2015.


VirginiaR.
"On the long road, take small steps." -- Jor-el, "The Foundling"
---
"clearly there is a lack of understanding between those two... he speaks Lunkheadanian and she Stubbornanian" -- chelo.
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Yay! Sue S. is back! party

Man, I am really getting behind in my commenting! In the office this morning which is thankfully quiet at the moment.

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The drive to Clark's apartment seemed to take a sweet piece of forever.

Simple sentence, but all of Lois' angst and fear is wrapped up in it.

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It was real. It was all real. Clark was Superman. Nightfall was on a collision course with Earth. And Superman (Clark!) was going to risk everything to save them all.

Suddenly grim reality is hitting Lois smack in the face. The pain most be awful.

When is the next installment? grovel


Morgana

A writer's job is to think of new plots and create characters who stay with you long after the final page has been read. If that mission is accomplished than we have done what we set out to do, which is to entertain and hopefully educate.
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Sue S. Offline OP
Kerth
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Kerth
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Holy crap, the holidays have hit me hard this year! In addition to usual festive goings-on, one of my brothers is getting married this Saturday and there have been all kinds of stuff to help out with on that front. Work has been crazier than usual because most of my team are on vacation and the clock is ticking down on getting our interfaces built and validated before February. It's madness, I tell you! MADNESS! cat

But, dang it, I really wanted to finish *something* this year, so I'm barely squeaking that resolution in under the wire. smile

Artemis - Thank you! I'll have the next part posted by tonight. wave

LWhite - What a wonderful compliment it is to hear that the story feels "alive." blush Thank you so much!

Virginia - Uh, you do remember that I said this was only going to cover about half the episode, right? It ends in a logical enough place, but I won't be tying up every single little loose thread. Yet. smirk

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I love that Lois confessed to loving Clark (no "as a brother" here), before he could get out that he was in love with her... or that he was Superman.

I started this story because I couldn't shake the feeling that Clark, knowing he might not be coming back, would want to tell Lois the truth. I also wanted to give them a much more private farewell than having Lois grab him for a quick kiss in front of an international audience. And, heck, if I was going to do all that, then Lois could certainly admit her real feelings and not couch them with "as a brother." thumbsup

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The guy at EPRAD who denied her entrance asked a strange question though. He asked if she was alone. He only told the people in the back that Superman had female visitor (or something of the sort). My thoughts of this were that Superman could have been back there but expecting Clark's folks (hence a man and a woman). Now, that I think about this though, they could also be thinking, "only allow Lois Lane back if Clark Kent is with her", because Daitch likes Clark and not Lois. Probably the most obvious answer is the correct one. Clark went to Kansas and not to EPRAD after Lois made the mistake of kicking him out of her apartment. But if that were so, why ask if she was alone?
Actually, Corporal Oliver didn't ask that question. He can see that Lois is there alone. It's whomever he's talking to on the other end who's asking the question. I like your "they like Clark, but not Lois" line of thought. laugh

Morgana - I am back! Thank you for noticing the details in the short stuff. It means a lot to me when the readers pick up on it. clap The next installment will be soon!

My thanks (again) to everyone who has commented. Y'all rock my world! dance


Lois: You know, I have a funny feeling that you didn't tell me your biggest secret.

Clark: Well, just to put your little mind at ease, Lois, you're right.
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Originally Posted by Sue S.
Actually, Corporal Oliver didn't ask that question. He can see that Lois is there alone. It's whomever he's talking to on the other end who's asking the question. I like your "they like Clark, but not Lois" line of thought. laugh
That's what I meant. The guy on the other end of the line, not the man Lois spoke to directly.


VirginiaR.
"On the long road, take small steps." -- Jor-el, "The Foundling"
---
"clearly there is a lack of understanding between those two... he speaks Lunkheadanian and she Stubbornanian" -- chelo.
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Sue S. Offline OP
Kerth
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Quote
That's what I meant. The guy on the other end of the line, not the man Lois spoke to directly.
I figured as much, but I thought I'd clarify, just in case. wink


Lois: You know, I have a funny feeling that you didn't tell me your biggest secret.

Clark: Well, just to put your little mind at ease, Lois, you're right.
Ides of Metropolis

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