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Joined: Oct 2013
Posts: 825
Features Writer
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OP
Features Writer
Joined: Oct 2013
Posts: 825 |
Feedback folder
So this story has a bit of a creepy vibe lol.
"It means never having to play it cool about how much you like something. It's basically a license to proudly emote on a somewhat childish level rather than behave like a supposed adult. Being a geek is extremely liberating."- Simon Pegg
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Joined: Jan 2009
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Pulitzer
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Pulitzer
Joined: Jan 2009
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This is a great idea! I love it. I love it so much I think my muse might make the sequel bahahah I swear I will finish the Rules series first before taking on any new fics...(And Testing a Theory) Okay, I'll try... Not a creepy vibe at all. I think you're onto something.
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Joined: Jul 2014
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Features Writer
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Features Writer
Joined: Jul 2014
Posts: 917 Likes: 2 |
Chilling, definitely. Of course I feel that way any time Luthor potentially knows Clark's secret. It definitely screams "SEQUEL NEEDED!" Don't leave poor Clark there. And what of Martha and Jonathan? They must be heartbroken.
Cuidadora
"Honey, we didn't care if you were a Russian or a Martian... You were ours... and we weren't giving you to anybody." ~ Martha in Strange Visitor
"A love that risks nothing is worth nothing." ~ Jonathan in Big Girls Don't Fly
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Joined: May 2011
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Nobel Peace Prize Winner
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Nobel Peace Prize Winner
Joined: May 2011
Posts: 6,142 Likes: 3 |
Way to chill your readers down to the bone! So creepy! Which, of course, means I loved it. I love the idea that Lex knows and is keeping Clark as a trophy. Please, please write a sequel!
Battle On, Deadly Chakram
"Being with you is stronger than me alone." ~ Clark Kent
"One little spark of inspiration is at the heart of all creation." ~ Figment the Dragon
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Beat Reporter
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Beat Reporter
Joined: Nov 2017
Posts: 384 Likes: 1 |
Jeepers, that was dark! Good though, and it grabbed me in the guts.
"HUMANS NEED FANTASY TO BE HUMAN. TO BE THE PLACE WHERE THE FALLING ANGEL MEETS THE RISING APE." -Terry Pratchett, Hogfather
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Joined: Nov 2017
Posts: 384 Likes: 1
Beat Reporter
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Beat Reporter
Joined: Nov 2017
Posts: 384 Likes: 1 |
Oops, double posted
Last edited by Endelda; 01/18/18 10:26 PM.
"HUMANS NEED FANTASY TO BE HUMAN. TO BE THE PLACE WHERE THE FALLING ANGEL MEETS THE RISING APE." -Terry Pratchett, Hogfather
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Joined: Oct 2013
Posts: 825
Features Writer
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OP
Features Writer
Joined: Oct 2013
Posts: 825 |
Well, I wasn’t expecting my tiny story to get such a big response!
Folc- it’s a bit different to my usual stuff, I’m glad you liked it! If you want to run with the idea, go for it. I think this one freaked my muse out, she’s bolted back into hiding lol
Cuidadora- Yes, Luthor knowing CK=S is a terrifying thought. I did consider putting something about the Kents in there but I couldn’t get it to flow.
DC- Haha, yes I thought you’d like the creepiness!
Endelda- I think this may actually be the darkest thing I’ve ever written, but I seem to be in a bit of a dark groove lately!
Thanks everyone!
"It means never having to play it cool about how much you like something. It's basically a license to proudly emote on a somewhat childish level rather than behave like a supposed adult. Being a geek is extremely liberating."- Simon Pegg
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Joined: Jul 2017
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Columnist
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Columnist
Joined: Jul 2017
Posts: 574 Likes: 14 |
Wow. Short but creepy yet powerful. I have known many people that have been committed, so I know the feeling of the unknown. Everyone is correct, it screams for sequel.
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Joined: Feb 2010
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Columnist
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Columnist
Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 739 Likes: 2 |
I'd post more feedback but it's hard to concentrate with the sound of the impending beatdown ringing in my ears...
Shallowford
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Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 3,057 Likes: 20
Pulitzer
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Pulitzer
Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 3,057 Likes: 20 |
I LOVE IT!!!!!! Thanks so much for answering the challenge! OMG, this is perfect and I can absolutely see Luthor pulling a stunt like this! But of course, you can't leave it there! How does Clark escape? Did Lois actually go through with marrying him, or does Clark just think she did because he has no contact with the outside? How will he get his justice/revenge? Please add more!
~•~
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Pulitzer
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Pulitzer
Joined: Apr 2010
Posts: 3,784 Likes: 28 |
Hmmm, NK the muse needs to come back really quick! This is a fantastic start to an amazing story!
Morgana
A writer's job is to think of new plots and create characters who stay with you long after the final page has been read. If that mission is accomplished than we have done what we set out to do, which is to entertain and hopefully educate.
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Joined: Oct 2013
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Features Writer
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OP
Features Writer
Joined: Oct 2013
Posts: 825 |
Whoa! So much feedback. I feel loved Carrie- Thank you To be honest, to me it kind of feels like an origin story for a dark version of Superman... some sort of weird Batman/Superman amalgam. Shallowford- That has to be the best reason for leaving a short comment I've ever seen Queenie- Thank you for the inspiration! It's pretty rare that I respond to a challenge (think this the second one I've completed lol) but yours stuck with me for some reason. Morgana- No promises, my muse is incredibly fickle these days Thanks everyone! I can't promise that I'll write a sequel (though I think Folc's muse is chewing on one )... but I said that about At First Sight and look where it ended up!
"It means never having to play it cool about how much you like something. It's basically a license to proudly emote on a somewhat childish level rather than behave like a supposed adult. Being a geek is extremely liberating."- Simon Pegg
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Joined: Aug 2016
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Hack from Nowheresville
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Hack from Nowheresville
Joined: Aug 2016
Posts: 179 |
Wow, wow and wow... Such power in so few sentences. This is wonderfully creepy. Despite the setting, you've managed to convey a sense of power and intent to Clark's musings that are really threatening to Luthor. One cannot help feeling he will prevail in the end. I'd love to read a sequel, whoever writes it!
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Joined: Oct 2013
Posts: 825
Features Writer
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OP
Features Writer
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Sorry Millefeuilles, I completely forgot to respond to you! Clark has a bit of revenge vibe going on in this one, which we don’t see a lot of in fic, but I figured after being stripped of everything he’d want to get even with the person that put him there. Personally I wouldn’t want to be in Luthor’s shoes when Clark gets free! Thanks very much
"It means never having to play it cool about how much you like something. It's basically a license to proudly emote on a somewhat childish level rather than behave like a supposed adult. Being a geek is extremely liberating."- Simon Pegg
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Joined: Jul 2014
Posts: 917 Likes: 2
Features Writer
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Features Writer
Joined: Jul 2014
Posts: 917 Likes: 2 |
Reading this again made me realize the depth of emotion you've shown in these few words. Very powerful and moving. And you've created quite a conundrum of loose ends for Clark to fix when he gets free. Well done seems so inadequate!
Cuidadora
"Honey, we didn't care if you were a Russian or a Martian... You were ours... and we weren't giving you to anybody." ~ Martha in Strange Visitor
"A love that risks nothing is worth nothing." ~ Jonathan in Big Girls Don't Fly
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Joined: Apr 2007
Posts: 9,065 Likes: 31
Boards Chief Administrator Nobel Peace Prize Winner
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Boards Chief Administrator Nobel Peace Prize Winner
Joined: Apr 2007
Posts: 9,065 Likes: 31 |
Hi Feli! Author's note: This was written in response to Queenie's 'Clark Gets Committed' challenge and is set at an unspecified time after BaTP/HoL
They say I’m crazy. Oh boy. Does Clark think he’s Superman? They don’t know about the kryptonite-infused paint on the walls that keeps me powerless. They don’t know that I am Superman. Sounds a tad cuckoo to me. I mean, who would have the resources to infiltrate an *asylum*? Lex is dead, after all. And so is Trask. TEMPUS: [url=http://www.cosgan.de/smilie.php] [/url I love irony. Don’t you, too? There is no one, now, to challenge Lex Luthor’s hold on Metropolis. What? Lex is still around? This certainly sounds like the start of one of those epics from the early 2000s. Michael
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Beat Reporter
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Beat Reporter
Joined: Oct 2018
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Damn, I liked this piece good job girl.
* once a Lois and Clark fan, always a Lois and Clark fan *
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Kerth
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Kerth
Joined: Dec 2005
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Very interesting. Clearly there needs to be a companion piece with Lois married to Lex. Something just as dark.
Framework4
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Pulitzer
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Pulitzer
Joined: Jan 2009
Posts: 4,025 |
Very interesting. Clearly there needs to be a companion piece with Lois married to Lex. Something just as dark. She definitely did a number on this one. Dark and twisted. I didn't marry Lois and Lex but I did write a companion fic inspired by this one. (With Feli's blessing of course.)Delusions of Grandeur
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