Delusions of Grandeur
Folc4evernaday
Chapter 11
***
Alice White poured over the paperwork scattered on the coffee table, taking a sip of her tea. Jimmy and Jack both huddled over the other side of the couch, jotting down notes and Perry sat at his desk, tapping away at the computer. She smiled, noting the way his reading glasses kept slipping off of Perry’s face. She felt like everyone they had interviewed after John Black’s death had been a dead end. All attempts to meet with Pete Black had been stonewalled by his attorney. All they had left was the option to comb through the research they’d been through again and try and find the needle in the haystack that would hopefully close the gap in the FBI’s case against Lex Luthor.
A wry expression crossed her face as she recalled the recent years where she’d been resentful of Perry’s job at the Planet. Now here she was helping to rebuild it with Perry’s second family as he referred to the boys and Lois. Truth be told a part of her missed it. Her days of investigating and chasing down leads had been cut short due to the surprise arrival of their first son, Steven. Then shortly after Jerry followed.
She wouldn’t trade her days with her boys for anything in the world, but there was a part of her that wondered what might have happened if she and Perry hadn’t started their family so young. She never did get a chance to make a real name for herself or get recognized by any of the more prestigious awards for journalists, but she loved every minute of it. After all, working side by side, chasing down leads was where she and Perry had met and fallen in love with one another. A smile crossed her face as she glanced over at Perry running his hand across his tired face. Though the circumstances weren’t ideal, it felt good to be in the game again.
“Okay, so, what have we got so far?” Jimmy asked, letting out a muffled yawn.
“You sound exhausted,” Alice commented.
“I’m not tired,” Jimmy shook his head. “I’m just stressed.” He pointed to the papers in her hand. “Anything?”
“Dr. Baines’ file was clean. The helicopter that went up in flames had mechanical failure that caused the explosion.” Alice frowned.
Jack nodded and then added, “Mechanic that did the inspection is no longer in the land of the living, so there’s no way to verify that.”
“Sound like a cover up if I ever heard one,” Perry commented with a sigh, walking up behind the sofa Alice was sitting at and placing a hand on her shoulder.
“Of course the story we get from the place he worked at is ‘he’s a great guy’ and ‘he would never do anything wrong’ so there’s not really much to go on there.” Jack rolled his eyes. “Guy obviously helped cover up a crime.
“Any money trail?” Jimmy asked.
“Nope,” Jack shook his head.
“Luthor paid him somehow we just got to figure out how,” Jimmy let out another yawn.
“Okay, that’s the third one,” Perry let out a yawn. “Why don’t we call it a night?”
The group nodded their agreement and Alice laid her notes down on the table. She looked to Jimmy who remained in his seat, looking through the paperwork on the table.
***
The credits scrolled across the screen and Clark looked next to him where Lois’ sleeping figure had slumped over, leaning against him. Halfway through the movie, she’d fallen asleep, and he hadn’t had the heart to move her just yet. Though the day hadn’t started out very well, it had ended on a happy note. After dinner, they’d found a movie to watch on one of the old cable networks. For a few hours at least, he was able to pretend things were normal.
Truth be told he wanted to savor the moment a little longer. His arm moved up, allowing her head to rest against his chest as he placed a tentative arm around her shoulders. For a moment he allowed himself to wonder if this was a glimpse into what life would be like if he ever got the courage to act on his feelings for her and tell her what was weighing on his heart.
He loved her.
There was no doubt in his mind that he was in love with Lois Lane. The past month had only intensified his feelings, solidifying the fact that he was cursed with being in love with someone that was destined to only love half of him. Given the fact that his powers were long gone he knew the chances of ever winning Lois Lane’s heart were slim to none. She was in love with Superman.
Superman had died in that Kryptonite cell.
Even if his powers ever did return he could never take the risk that came with putting the red cape and ‘S’ on again. His parents, Lois, his friends… Everyone was in danger. That knowledge continued to keep him up at night, robbing him of precious sleep he knew his body needed to heal from the damage Luthor and his thugs had done to him.
Lex Luthor knew he was Superman.
Lex Luthor knew the one thing that could destroy him.
As long as he stayed hidden everyone was safe but what would happen when all of this was over? What would happen when they finally caught him, and Luthor made his final move of exposing Clark to the world as a liar?
He dreaded what would happen on that day.
He prayed by then he would have a plan for how to protect those he loved from the wrath he was sure would ensue once the news was out. He’d have to find a way to tell everyone, warn them.
He looked to Lois as she nestled her head against his chest in her sleep and he felt a lump in his throat. This was one of the things he’d sought since as long as he could remember. Finding someone, he could love and possibly start a family with. Just being normal as he had put it to his dad when he’d first moved to Metropolis.
That dream was gone.
He knew it.
Luthor would make sure any chance of him and anyone he cared about having any semblance of a normal life was destroyed. It was the double-edged sword that he was sure would swing in both directions. He wanted Luthor to pay for his crimes and stop him once and for all, but at the same time, he feared what would happen the day he finally had the handcuffs slapped on his wrists.
The idea of facing him in the courtroom as Clark or Superman unnerved him to no end. He knew if given the opportunity Luthor would take advantage of the situation and expose his secret to the world. He would never be able to have a normal life again…at least not the one he wanted.
Deciding he’d tortured himself long enough, he sighed, turning himself toward her in order to lift her up off the couch. Her long legs hung from his arm as he adjusted her in his arms, allowing her head to rest against his shoulder as he carried her back toward the bedroom.
***
Jack Davenport took a sip of his coffee, staring at the late hour on his watch as he turned to Dr. Kahn who was starting to stir from the hospital bed he was sleeping in. He’d spent hours talking with the doctor that had been treating him, then had waited for Kahn to wake up. Christina said they had an ID on Kahn’s attacker.
A smile crossed his lips as he realized how close he was to cracking the Luthor case wide open. He wouldn’t make the same mistake again. Victor Talley had already issued a federal warrant for Nigel St. John. All he had to do was get Dr. B.D. Kahn on the record with his testimony and give Sheldon Bender the opportunity to cross-examine him. Bender was smart and would try not to cross, but he knew one thing Bender prided himself on was his reputation. That was exactly how he would get him.
***
Clark ran a weary hand over his face, staring at the clock in front of him. Sleep was not coming tonight. It was a quarter till midnight, and he couldn’t seem to get his mind to shut off. The fears he harbored of what would happen when they finally caught Luthor continued to haunt him. The crippling anxiety was draining.
He stared at the phone on the table, recalling Lois’ request for him to call Jimmy. His young friend was probably still up. He recalled many nights where he’d been woken in the late hours with a lead on a story they had him researching. His hand felt shaky as he reached for the phone, holding it in his hand.
What would he say?
Deciding that he’d put the conversation off long enough, he stretched his thumb over the number three and pressed it. He then pushed the green phone button, initiating the call. He let out a shallow breath, putting the phone to his ear.
“A bit late to be calling for a background check, isn’t it?” he heard Jimmy’s voice echo from the other end of the line. Clark was silent for a moment, feeling a wave of emotion wash over him as he struggled to find his voice. Jimmy seemed to sense the hesitancy and called out, “Lois? Everything okay?”
Clark took a breath and finally spoke, “It’s me, Jimmy,”
The pause was deafening as he waited for his friend to respond, “CK?” Jimmy choked out with a strain.
“Yeah,” Clark responded, allowing another pause on the line as he added, “It’s been awhile.”
“Man, you have…no idea how good it is to hear your voice.” Jimmy’s voice crackled through the earpiece and Clark could feel the sting of tears in his own eyes as the emotions he’d kept bottled up threatened to become too much for him.
“Yours sounds pretty good too,” Clark responded, uncertain what to say to the emotional response from his friend he was so sure he would never hear from again during his torture.
“So…how are you?” Jimmy asked cautiously.
“Better,” he said cautiously, “I think?” Clark wasn’t sure how convincing he was or if he should elaborate on that point.
“I guess you heard about the fire?” Jimmy asked.
“Yeah, I’ve been through the file,” Clark said.
“She never gave up you know,” Jimmy said sadly. “After the fire and….the story leak Jack and I thought it might be true.” There was a pause, and Clark distinctly heard a sniff from Jimmy as he added, “Lois wouldn’t give up though.”
“Famous Lane stubbornness at its best,” Clark responded lamely, cracking a smile.
“Well, you know Lois,” Jimmy retorted with a sigh, “Once she’s made her mind up about something there’s no talking her out of it. I’m just glad she was right.”
“You and me both,” Clark said with a sigh.
There was another pause, and Jimmy began cautiously, “You know this hasn’t been easy on her.”
Clark was caught off guard by Jimmy’s admission but didn’t say anything, letting his friend continue. “I mean, Lois puts up a good front. She always has, but what Luthor did to her….what he did to you. It nearly broke her.”
Imagining anything that would break Lois was hard for Clark to envision. Jimmy had mentioned something Luthor had done to her. Curiosity fueled his next question, “What do you mean? What did Luthor do to her?”
“Nuh-uh,” Jimmy responded, “If she hasn’t told you yet…Just let her tell you herself.”
“Should I be concerned?” Clark asked.
“Let’s just say after the fire and what he did to Lois your rage at Luthor became something all of us share enthusiastically,” Jimmy responded with venom.
“He certainly brings it out in people,” Clark responded lamely, uncertain how to respond to Jimmy’s admission.
“Yeah, he does,” Jimmy said cautiously. “Hopefully when this is all over we’ll have him locked away in a nice padded cell along with all his cronies.” A flash of memories ran through Clark’s mind, and he was silent for a moment, recalling his time under Dr. Kelly’s care in his own padded cell. “CK? You okay?”
“Fine,” Clark lied, pulling himself from the avalanche of painful memories that were threatening to pull him in. “Listen, Jimmy, could you do me a favor?”
“Name it,” Jimmy responded.
“Can you see what you can find out about a Dr. Gretchen Kelly for me?” Clark asked, recalling the doctor’s name. He doubted anything would come up, but it would help put him at ease knowing what had happened to the doctor that had tortured him.
“Gretchen Kelly,” Jimmy noted the name aloud before letting out a stifled yawn, “I’ll get on it first thing in the morning. I should have something back from my contact at STAR Labs pretty soon too.”
“Lois will be glad to hear that,” Clark said then added, “You sound exhausted. You need to get some rest. We’ll talk later.”
“Promise?” Jimmy asked.
“Promise,” Clark responded before adding, “Night Jimmy,”
“Night CK.”
***
Asabi straightened the rearview mirror as he looked back at his passenger, “Are you sure making a trip of this magnitude is something you want to do, Mr. Luthor?”
Lex looked back up at Asabi and nodded, “This is something I need to handle myself Asabi. Given Nigel’s current predicament it’s not something I can trust him to carry out.”
“Yes, Mr. Luthor,” Asabi nodded, pulling out of the driveway and heading east. “We should reach our destination by tomorrow evening.”
***
Jimmy set the phone down and leaned back on the couch, recalling his conversation with his friend. Clark seemed so different now. Lois hadn’t told him much about the rescue. She hinted at some trauma, but Jimmy didn’t press for details at the time. He’d just been grateful to know his friend was safe.
Now weeks later, the questions continued to plague his mind as he began taking more of a lead in the investigation into ‘the boss’ with Alice and Jack than he’d ever done before. Perry, of course, continued to help train him on how to read body language and interrogate a possible source to get the information and coax them into coming forward. That was the key that he seemed to struggle with. Plenty of people would tell you what you wanted to hear, but not many would agree to testify or put a mark on their head the way Lois and John Black had.
He had a long list of people to investigate, but Clark had asked him to look into Gretchen Kelly so that’s what he would do. Maybe it would help lead them to someone or something to help solidify the case against Luthor? Jimmy sighed, letting out a yawn. He would have to wait till morning to start his research. Right now, he needed sleep.
***
Dry. Lois felt her lips, and she could feel the dryness in her throat, mouth, and lips. She grimaced, placing a hand on her face as she began to stir. She looked around the familiar surroundings recalling how she had fallen asleep next to Clark earlier. She looked down at the wrinkled shirt she was wearing and felt a warmth across her cheeks.
Clark must have carried her to bed.
She swung her legs around the bed, getting up to fetch a glass of water from the kitchen when she heard a sound coming from the hallway. She felt her heart tighten in her chest as she flattened herself against the door, peering out the cracked door to see where the sound was coming from. A light flickered from the hallway, and she frowned, realizing it was coming from the television in the den.
She poked her head further out in the hallway, reassuring herself there was indeed nothing out there. The sound from the television was set at a low volume, making it so you could barely make out what was even playing. She sighed and ran a hand through her hair then headed for the kitchen to quench her thirst. She grabbed a glass from the cabinet and poured herself water from the sink. After a few moments, she made her way back through the hallway and stopped outside the doorway of the den.
She glanced at the clock on the wall. It was well past two am. What was he doing still up? She tightened her arms around herself making her way into the den where she found Clark sitting on the loveseat with his back to her. “Clark? It’s two am,” she yawned sleepily.
“I didn’t mean to wake you,” he apologized looking back at her.
“You didn’t wake me,” she said, holding up the glass in her hand as she moved closer. He looked up, and she saw the defeated expression on his face through the reflection of the blue and white light coming from the television. The lines of worry were written all over his face, and she could make out the dark lines under his eyes. “Couldn’t sleep?” She took a seat next to him.
He shrugged and dipped his head into his hands as he stared down at the floor, She twisted her mouth and saw the strain on his features as he attempted to avoid eye contact with her. She knew all too well how sleep could remain elusive when the nightmares became too much. Given what he’d been through it wasn’t a huge stretch to think he might be suffering from something similar.
She reached out her hand and placed it on his left shoulder. “They do go away eventually.”
He didn’t respond.
She was quiet for a moment allowing the muffled sound of the television playing in the background to fill the silence. She took a breath, setting her glass down on the side table and glanced at the television. It was an old Perry Mason episode. A smile curled on her lips, and she sighed, “My mom used to love this show.”
He looked up and nodded, “So did my dad,”
Lois recalled the many afternoons and evenings of watching Perry Mason with her mom as well as some of the fights that the show was meant to cover up. More times than she could remember her mom would put them in the back room of the house with the volume higher than necessary. Lucy was too young to realize the fight that was going on behind the closed door. All she seemed to care about at the time was whether Perry Mason would get his guy.
“Lucy and I used to watch Perry Mason reruns with mom all the time when we were younger. Most of the time it was just to keep her company after daddy left.”
The memory of her mother’s tired and depressed face after her father had walked out flashed in her mind and Lois looked over and saw the same weary lines around Clark’s eyes. She recalled the many times she’d caught him sleeping during the day and how tired he seemed. If he were up all night avoiding night terrors, then that would explain why he was sleeping all the time. She felt a pang of guilt for not putting two and two together sooner.
“So, how long have you been having them?” she asked, placing a hand on his knee.
“Huh?” he looked at her with a surprised expression. For a split second he looked like he would pull away, but instead, he shook his head, “A few weeks I guess.”
Lois nodded and allowed the information to sink in. The past few weeks now seemed different as she realized what Clark had been trying to hide from her. She had a sinking suspicion he was still holding back on what was truly keeping him up at night but decided not to push it. He still didn’t know she knew he was Superman. A part of her wondered if she should just tell him but given how fragile everything seemed she opted not to. He had to work through whatever it was on his own. She knew that. It was just hard to watch and not have the ability to help or do anything.
“Do you want to talk about it?” she asked, uncertain if she could handle what nightmare could bring the strongest man in the world to his knees.
He shook his head and pointed to the television, “You know not many actors can pull off playing dual roles in an episode like this. Raymond Burr really makes this Grimes character a believable separate character.”
Lois bit her lip as she realized simultaneously that Clark probably knew more than anyone how hard it was to carry on two identities and that he was trying to change the subject. She pulled her hand back from where she’d placed it on his knee and turned toward the television, seeing the familiar episode of ‘The Case of the Dead Ringer’ playing. She stole a glance at Clark as she watched Raymond Burr’s character of Grimes be transformed into a Perry Mason lookalike.
How long did it take him to change between identities?
Clark kept his hair loose and neatly groomed whereas Superman always had it slicked back. The voice he used was different. The way he held himself was definitely different. In a way, he was playing two different characters. She had so many questions that nagged at her, but she knew she couldn’t ask them. She couldn’t tell him what she knew.
She let out a sigh, “Must get confusing going back and forth,”
“I’m sure it can be,” Clark nodded, letting out a yawn as he leaned back against the cushions of the sofa.
“I remember when I was working undercover on my first sting operation I had to train myself to respond to my undercover name. I had Perry start using it so I wouldn’t get confused.” She let out a laugh. “Steve Lombard was very disappointed to discover the new girl he’d heard about turned out to be just me.”
Clark let out a light chuckle, “That guy’s a piece of work.”
“Lombard’s a walking harassment suit,” Lois rolled her eyes. “But he still keeps it ambiguous which is why Perry could never do anything. That and he has a knack for getting all the big players on the record which gives him job security.”
“Had,” Clark supplied with a yawn.
“Right, I forget,” Lois said sadly. “Maybe one day the Planet will be back though.”
“Mmm hmm,” Clark nodded incoherently.
Lois looked over and noticed his eyes were drooping as he leaned back against the cushions, his head nodding to the left as he slowly drifted off. “Clark?”
“Hmm?”
“You should go to bed,” she whispered, patting his shoulder.
“No, I’m fine,” he said, not bothering to open his eyes in response. “I’m listening.”
“You’re exhausted,” she moved her hand to his chest.
“Been exhausted for months, but I’m still listening.” He murmured. “Just keep talking,”
She sighed, leaning back against the cushion on the sofa and continued, “Did I ever tell you about y first undercover assignment?”
“No, but something tells me you’re about to,” Clark mumbled.
“Hey, I won a Kerth for it.” Lois grinned back proudly.
“Big surprise,” he shot back with a sleepy grin.
“Hey, I wasn’t always at the top of my game,” she shrugged.
“Somehow I have a hard time imagining you fetching coffee or working in the mailroom,” He yawned.
“I interned in research,” she scrunched her nose up. “Perry gave me my first shot at a reporting job, but I didn’t get my first real break into investigative reporting for a few years.”
“Uh-huh,” was Clark’s tired response.
He grunted his, and she sighed, “Anyway, I got a job as a waitress over there at Hell’s Kitchen, the club that used to be there before the Metro Club was built. I got a tip there was supposed to a big meeting with some of the guys running a car theft ring. The thieves were drugging their victims so that there was no recollection of the crime. All the victims were dumped around Hell’s Kitchen.”
“What I wasn’t expecting was Bruno Mannheim—the guy that ran a lot of under the table deals from there? You know, illegal gambling, shark loan type stuff? Turned out he had upped his game and was trying his hand at cooking up illegal drugs.” Lois grew thoughtful recalling the bust. She’d been caught by Mannheim taking photos of the lab just before the police had raided the place. “In hindsight, it probably wasn’t the smartest move.” She let out a light laugh, “I’m sure if we’d been partnered back then you probably wouldn’t have thought so either but it turned out okay. The dealers were caught, and they stopped the thieves. No one ever knew what happened to Mannheim though. He just kinda disappeared…”
***
The sound of horns honking in the distance and the morning train rushing by were the last thing on Bill Henderson’s mind as he looked to his passenger who had his head buried in the large paper bag from Luigi’s. Henderson looked around the alley where they were parked, ensuring once more than there was no one around that could cause any trouble.
He watched as the carefully wrapped sandwiches from Luigi’s were unwrapped and scarfed down in a sloppy mess. He did his best not to make eye contact as he waited for this Bobby to finish. Lois said this guy was one of the best sources she had for knowing what was going on. He’d had to swear he wouldn’t use him for any official investigations and then spend an arm and a leg on gourmet sandwiches that appeared to disappear in the blink of an eye. Almost a hundred dollars in food gone in less than ten minutes. Whatever information this guy had better be worth it.
***
One Month AgoThe car door closed and Beverly Cox stepped out of the town car, wearing a pair of shorts and a white t-shirt and sneakers. She felt so out of place here in the country but given this was where Lois Lane would have felt most comfortable she knew this was where she would find the missing reporter.
***
I saved Luthor tonight. I never thought I’d actually regret saving a life. Now all I can think of is how I might have just helped subject more crime and pain on Luthor’s victims. I want to tell Lois what I know. I want to warn her, but I know she won’t believe me. She never believes me. Luthor could commit murder in the street, and she’d still be defending him. Lois let out a long breath, setting the journal down on the table. A chill ran down her spine as she recalled how many times Clark had tried to talk to her about her relationship with Lex. There was always disdain and an undertone of insecurity when he brought the subject up. She never could understand why he held so much anger and antipathy toward Lex until now.
She had thanked him that night he stopped Lex’s bleeding. She’d been so clueless back then. Fuentes and his crew refused to take money from Lex because of how bad his reputation was on the streets. In hindsight, she should have looked into what his reputation was, but she’d been more grateful to be out of the situation than curious about Lex’s reputation among criminals.
That had been a mistake. She let out a sigh, wondering momentarily how many mistakes she would have to face by the end of this.
***
Wayne set the shovel down, hearing the crunch of straw behind him. He turned to see an unfamiliar brunette standing behind him, holding a .45 caliber pistol aimed at his chest. “You must not be from around here,”
“No, and I have a feeling you might know something about strangers, Mr. Irig,” the woman took a step toward him.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Wayne narrowed his eyes at her.
“Why don’t I believe you?” she challenged, grabbing him by the collar.
***
“Pie smells good,” Jonathan said with a smile.
“You’ve already had your slice,” Martha scolded when she saw Jonathan eying the pie she’d just pulled out of the oven.
“I should test each one though,” Jonathan argued, eying the pie Martha had cooling on the counter.
“You can leave the taste testing to the Johnson boy,” Martha shrugged her shoulders. “You’re supposed to be watching your cholesterol.”
“No pity for a man that faced death and survived,” he gave a mock sigh.
Martha smirked at him, “You can only use that card for so long you know,”
“Is it working?” he asked.
She sighed, reaching over for the pie she’d sliced earlier and placed a sliver on a saucer for him. He grinned eagerly, picking up his fork to take a bite when a rapid tapping at the door stopped him.
Martha laughed, “Saved by the door,” She walked to the door and opened it, finding a frazzled Wayne Irig on the other side. “Wayne?”
“Martha,” Wayne nodded to her, “Can I come in?”
“Sure,” she stepped aside for him to enter.
***
The engine turned over, and Beverly Cox readjusted her sunglasses in the rearview mirror. Nothing. She’d been checking into all the Kents’ neighbors trying to find someone that may be helping to hide Lois Lane.
Nigel said he was sure the Kents had been helping her. Unfortunately, his last visit had ended in a situation that required her to make a visit to the rugged Midwest under the guise of checking into expansion opportunities for LexCorp. She’d gotten rid of the evidence of Nigel’s visit. Now all that was left to do was find Lois Lane.
***
Present DayLois began to stir. Her neck muscles were stiff. Her eyes fluttered open, and she saw the edge of the coffee table. She craned her neck and looked behind her. Clark was fast asleep behind her. She bit her lip, letting out a muttered curse. She’d fallen asleep.
She lifted her head up from the couch cushion where she’d fallen in the middle of the night. Clark’s arm laid across her hip, and she could make out the light snore coming from behind her. She held her breath, trying not to make any noise as she reached down to lift his hand from her hip so she could loosen herself from his arms without waking him.
She slowly rolled out from under Clark’s arm, falling to the floor on her knees and gently lowering his arm back down on the cushion of the couch. She let out a long breath, standing to her feet as she looked back at Clark, still sleeping.
He said he’d been exhausted for months. She wondered momentarily how long he had been hiding the fact that he wasn’t sleeping. He admitted to not sleeping for a few weeks but who really knew? She pulled down a fleece blanket from behind the couch, shaking it open and letting it fall over him and then turned back toward the bedroom to get ready.
The door behind her closed and she rushed to the bathroom, turning the shower on. She turned back and grabbed a towel from the rack and caught a glimpse of her reflection in the mirror. Her face was littered with crease marks from where she had been laying on the couch. The imprint of the cushion’s uneven texture was pressed into her skin. She reached up a hand to finger the hot flesh before turning away from her reflection.
She shed the t-shirt and shorts she had been wearing as a nightgown and tossed them to the floor, followed soon by her undergarments. The towel hung on the corner of the shower rod as she stepped inside the shower, allowing the warm water to rain across her face, obliterating the impression on her face. Her eyes closed as she tilted her head up, allowing the water to rain down her body.
She could still feel his arms around her, and she hated how that made her feel. Despite every attempt to keep him at a distance and not allow herself to get drawn in, she found herself unable to pull away. It was a losing battle. She knew it was a dangerous game, to begin with. Trying to prevent herself from feeling what had been there unknowingly for over a year was like attempting to convince her left part of the brain it didn’t need the right. It was a losing battle to a war she’d been fighting for months.
She was too close.
She knew it.
If she could, she’d run away and bury herself behind work and the many things she used to hide behind before. Now it was different though. There was no story to chase. There was no escape. There was no risk of any of their former colleagues casting judgment or interrupting the conversation she knew had to be had before she could even contemplate anything with him. That was the problem. He was too available. She had no buffer to hide behind. Just the reality of how deep her feelings were and the added complication of how painful that new reality was.
She was in no condition to be thinking of anything beyond friendship with anyone let alone Clark. Especially after what she’d been through with Lex. She knew it was too soon. She knew it was too complicated. She knew all of these things yet found herself still fighting the pull that continued to call out to her, making the day to day all that more painful.
They were both battling the mental scars Lex had cast on them.
They were both still recovering both physically and emotionally.
She had no business looking for anything beyond friendship with Clark.
Yet here she was, finding herself tempted once more to wonder what if…
***
Victor Talley set the phone on his desk down on the receiver and turned toward the guest in his office. Ever since the sting operation for taking down Lex Luthor had been authorized, he had been having regular visits from the lead detective investigating Metropolis’ crime reign from the boss. His brow furrowed as he cleared his throat, “Inspector Henderson, I’m assuming you have some information for me?”
“More of a question,” Bill Henderson’s mouth thinned into a line as he looked to Talley with a grunt. “A request really.”
“Why do I get the feeling I’m not going to like this?” Talley inquired, noting the concerned expression on Henderson’s face.
“Now don’t be so judgmental, Victor,” Henderson sighed. “You could like the proposition.”
“I’m not buying it,” Talley shook his head and jutted his chin out, “Spill,”
Henderson ran a hand against his chin, “Let’s say I came about information on a contract being put out on a potential witness that is also responsible for unspeakable crimes.”
Talley turned to face Henderson with a curious look on his face, “I’m sorry is there a question in there, Bill?”
Bill nodded, “What are our options in getting this person to cooperate with the investigation?”
“Is this person willing to cooperate?” Talley asked.
“It’s only a matter of time before this person shows back up,” Henderson shrugged. “If you had Luthor stalking your every move and knew you were being hunted by the most notorious killers in the world what would you do?”
***
The faint sound of chopping came from across the hall. Clark let out a low moan as he awoke, recalling the peaceful night’s sleep he’d had. A smile crossed his face as the memory of falling asleep next to Lois came back to him. He sat up, running a hand through his hair as he looked around. He caught a glimpse of the clock on the wall that read, 3:45pm. He groaned, running both hands up and down his face and he stood up. He’d slept almost the entire day away, but he knew his body had needed it.
He hadn’t slept that good in a long time. He felt at peace. More content than he had in months. Rested. He’d spent months sleeping with one eye open, paranoid of what terror was waiting around the corner. Now here he was finally free and unable to find solace in his freedom. Last night had been different though. Despite the late hour, Lois had stayed up with him, talking with him until he fell asleep.
She didn’t have to stay up with him.
She could have gone back to bed at any moment, but she didn’t.
He was grateful for the company. Having someone there to help drown out the fears and the harsh reality of what he’d survived helped his mind relax enough to allow sleep to come. He hadn’t slept that good in ages. Surprisingly he didn’t feel sore or overtired from the late wakeup but rather energized.
He reached for the pair of glasses that had fallen off his face in the middle of the night. It seemed strange to not feel a sense of dread when he stared at the spectacles. Part of his hesitancy in shaving the rest of his beard off came from his fear of what would happen if Lois ever found out about Superman. Remaining hidden behind the messy hair, goatee, and glasses helped him feel safe from discovery. Though he knew the days of Superman being a problem were long gone. He doubted he would ever know the freedom that came with flying in the clouds again.
A sad expression crossed his face at that realization, and he frowned, placing the glasses on his face as he walked into the bedroom to get dressed. He missed it. He couldn’t deny that. He had spent years loathing his powers only to now find the day he finally became human enough to bleed it wasn’t what he wanted at all. He missed being able to get dressed in a blink of an eye and heating his coffee with a blast of heat vision. Though at times he felt out of place and different his powers were what made him who he was. Without them, he felt lost.
He stared at his reflection in the mirror, uncertain what to make of the man staring back at him. He let out a long breath and continued getting ready for the day. ‘Superman is gone,’ he told himself. ‘Clark Kent is gone.’
With that, he strode back into the bedroom and headed toward the kitchen to find Lois. He made his way down the narrow hallway, leading to the kitchen and spotted Lois in the corner with her back to him. There was a pot of water on the stove, waiting to boil and a large bowl in front of her with lettuce and cabbage mixed together. Diced tomatoes were on the cutting board in front of her.
“Hey,” he said, walking past her to get a glass from the cabinet.
“Hey,”
He caught a glimpse of a smile on her face as he turned to wash his hands and fill his glass from the sink. Her gaze stayed on him a moment longer before turning her attention back to the cutting board. He took a sip of water and then set the glass down and walked over to the stove where the pot of water was beginning to boil. He spotted the box of spaghetti noodles next to it and asked, “Have you added anything to the water yet?”
“No,” Lois shook her head, dropping the chopped tomato into the salad and taking the cutting board to the sink to rinse it off.
He grabbed the salt shaker and olive oil sitting on the counter and sprinkled a little of each in the now boiling water before adding in the noodles. A bowl of chopped onions sat on the counter next to the stove. He reached down to grab a pan from the cabinet below. He turned the eye of the stove on and set the pan on top of it in order to heat it up.
“Here,” Lois pushed the package of ground hamburger toward him, and he nodded, unwrapping the plastic from it and dumping it into the pan. “Spaghetti?” he guessed, sprinkling the Italian seasoning and salt onto the meat as it began to sizzle inside the pan.
“It’s one of the few things I know how to make without following the directions on a box,” Lois gave him a half-smile.
<<“I know how to make four things. This is the only one without chocolate.”>>He recalled the conversation she’d had with Superman during the heat wave when the superhero had supposedly been staying at his place. Lois never did end up making dinner that night. Both of them had left to handle the runaway Metro train. The gesture had been more than welcome at the time. Given how Superman had been blamed for the heatwave and the entire city had turned its back on him, Lois was the only one left cheering in his corner.
His brow furrowed for a moment, recalling the stress he’d been under during the heat wave. They had traced the cause of the heat wave back to LexCorp but found no intentional wrongdoing on Luthor’s part. Who was in charge of the investigation?
“Clark?” Lois waved a hand at him. “You okay?”
“Just remembering something,” he said shaking his head and turning his attention to the meat that now looked almost completely brown. He took the wooden spatula to the meat and began chopping it in the pan, adding in the onion and other seasonings as he continued to stir the ground beef around.
“Remembering what?” Lois asked.
He stared at the meat in the pan and removed it from the burner before grabbing the strainer from the counter and a few paper towels to drain out the grease. He looked up, meeting Lois’ concerned expression.
“Sabotage,” he said with a frown.
“Could you be more specific?” Lois prompted.
“The almost train crash during the heat wave,” he elaborated and then mumbled more to himself rather than her, “The heat wave.”
“I remember,” she nodded letting out a disgusted snort, “That Dr. Sayer was a moron.”
Clark frowned, “Do you remember who was in charge of the LuthorPower investigation?”
“That would have been the NRC,” Lois recalled aloud as she helped pat the grease out of the strainer. “What’s this about?”
“The train’s brake lines were cut. The power lines were cut…” he mumbled aloud, wiping the grease out of the pan.
“What are you talking about?” Lois asked as she looked back at him.
“The rescues,” Clark explained, recalling the clean-cut cords he’d found when inspecting the train after the almost crash. The same was true for the power lines that had trapped the underground construction crew. “They were set up by someone.”
Lois shook her head adamantly, “There was no sabotage listed on the report. I should know I was the one that picked up the inspector’s…”
“Well, it wasn’t on the report.” Clark frowned, realizing he may have just given too much information. What he knew about the sabotage had not been included in the report, but he suspected that was because Luthor had paid the inspector off. He had seen the smooth cut on the power lines and on the brakes as Superman. The original officers on the scene had even suggested sabotage.
“If it wasn’t on the report then how do you know it was sabotage?” Lois asked, turning to look at him.
“I just…do,” he finished lamely. Lois stared back at him with her arms crossed over her chest, and he fought the urge to provide another fake 'Superman-told-me' story to her. After everything that had happened, he couldn’t stomach lying to her.
“Okay,” she shrugged, “So, who do you think was behind the sabotage?”
“If I had to guess, Luthor,” he said with a heavy breath, feeling the weight lift off him as he stared back at her. Thankfully she didn’t press him for how he knew there was sabotage. She just took him at his word. Still, it wasn’t like Lois to let something like that go.
“So, sabotage to create a disaster in order to…what?” Lois wondered aloud.
“Prove the theory he’d planted in the press,” Clark finished darkly.
“What the Superman theory?” Lois asked, scrunching up her nose. “That was Dr. Sayer.”
Clark groaned, “If there’s anything I’ve learned in the past few months it’s to never underestimate Luthor.”
“So you think Sayer was put up to it?” Lois guessed. Clark was silent, watching her process the information. “I guess it couldn’t hurt to check out. Alice has a few contacts on the board. I’ll see if she can check into it.”
“You’re not going to dust off the famous Lois Lane Rolodex?” he asked, looking at her in surprise.
“That kind of defeats the purpose of playing dead if snitches know I’m alive,” Lois gave him a weak smile, reaching for the jar of sauce on the counter.
Clark frowned, watching as she poured the sauce into the pan with the meat, stirring it all together. The pained expression on her face felt like a punch in the gut. He recalled the several conversations they’d had about Jimmy or Perry getting information for them, but he never really put it together before. She couldn’t do the legwork like she used to. She couldn’t take charge the way she once had. Luthor had robbed her of that.
“I think the noodles are just about done,” Lois said, pointing to the pot on the stove that was now boiling loudly.
“Huh?”
“The noodles,” she repeated.
“Oh!” He turned the burner off and took the pot from the stove. Sure enough, the noodles were ready. He carried the pot to the sink to drain the water then returned the pot to the counter where Lois had set out a potholder. “Sorry,” he gave her an apologetic smile.
“No problem,” she said with a sad expression, looking down at the red sauce that was beginning to splatter.
“Do you want to talk about it?” he asked. He noticed the small lines around her eyes tighten as her jaw jutted out. She was upset.
“Lois?” he placed a hand on her shoulder, turning her toward him.
She looked away, refusing to look back at him. “Um, food should be ready soon.” He sighed, uncertain what to do. Her body turned the rest of the way so she was facing him and she added, “I try not to think about it. The fact that no one outside of you and a few select people from the Planet know I’m alive.” Her voice cracked, and she looked down. He felt his chest tighten when he saw how hard she was fighting to remain in control of her emotions. “I don’t even know if my family knows.”
The last statement was hard to swallow as he stared back at her. She’d practically thrown the phone at him and begged him to call his parents after they’d begun talking again. He had refused. He still couldn’t bring himself to call them. He couldn’t face them. All this while Lois wondered if her parents were mourning the loss of their child, unaware she was still alive and well.
“I’m sorry,” he said lamely, knowing full well how empty the words must seem.
“It is what it is,” she shrugged it off, looking away.
He knew better than to believe the bluster she was trying to give him. He tilted her chin up to look at him and allowed his hand to move across her face. “It’s not going to be like this forever,”
“I know,” she replied hoarsely, stepping away. “That’s the problem.”
He opened his mouth to respond but found himself at a loss for words. The sound of a car door slamming came from outside, and her face went pale looking around the kitchen nervously. She quickly turned the knob to the burner, killing the heat mid-boil. “Wait here,” he instructed, moving toward the living room.
***
“If it wasn’t on the report then how do you know it was sabotage?” Lois knew the answer to her question before she even asked it but still she had to give him at least an opportunity to try and be straight with her. ‘Please don’t lie to me’ she thought to herself as she turned to face Clark.
“I just…do,” the words were all he seemed to be able to muster as he looked away from her.
She could press him and force him to tell her how he knew this information, but given that he hadn’t outright lied to her and made up a story about Superman telling him she tried to play along. ‘At least he’s trying to be honest,’ she thought to herself.
“Okay,” she shrugged her shoulders, “So, who do you think was behind the sabotage?”
“If I had to guess, Luthor,” he seemed to relax, releasing a breath he’d been holding.
“So, sabotage to create a disaster in order to…what?” Lois wondered aloud. She could only guess what Clark was hinting at as his face became tense. Whatever it was he was putting together was enough to distract him enough to nearly burn the pan he was cooking in.
“Prove the theory he’d planted in the press,” Clark finished darkly. His arms crossed over his chest, and she could make out the familiar stance he used to take when confronting criminals as Superman. It was hard to believe how blind she’d been. Though he hid so much from her, there was a lot of clues he gave that hinted at his dual identity.
She played along, following his train of thought and gave him a confused look, “What the Superman theory?” The theory that Superman was the cause of the heat wave had been planted by one of New Troy’s top scientists, Dr. Edward Sayer. He’d been disgraced after the incident and was now teaching at one of the local engineering schools in Metropolis.
Lois let out a breath, “That was Dr. Sayer.”
Or was it? She knew better than anyone how easily Lex could manipulate others to do his bidding. Surely it wasn’t a huge stretch to think Dr. Sayer may have been paid by Lex to plant the idea in the press, but the reason for why wasn’t something she could rationalize. Even now she couldn’t see how framing Superman for the cause of the heat wave did Lex any good.
Clark groaned and shook his head adamantly, “If there’s anything I’ve learned in the past few months it’s to never underestimate Luthor.”
“So you think Sayer was put up to it?” Lois guessed. He didn’t respond, and she took that as him wanting her to figure it out for herself. The only problem was she couldn’t figure it out herself. She couldn’t pull out her sources and hit the pavement digging for the truth. Everyone she knew in Metropolis thought she was dead. “I guess it couldn’t hurt to check out. Alice has a few contacts on the board. I’ll see if she can check into it.”
“You’re not going to dust off the famous Lois Lane Rolodex?” A small smile crossed Clark’s face. She was sure he meant the comment as friendly teasing, but the months of isolation had taken their toll on her.
She let out a bitter laugh, “That kind of defeats the purpose of playing dead if snitches know I’m alive,” she reached for the jar of sauce on the counter. She felt Clark’s eyes on her as she fought to keep her emotions in check. The bottled up emotions she continued to push down was slowly becoming too much for her over time. She knew eventually she’d have to face them, but not today.
She turned her attention to the pot that was boiling on the stove, “I think the noodles are just about done,”
“Huh?” he looked at her in confusion.
“The noodles,” she repeated.
“Oh!” Clark turned his attention away from her to tend to the noodles. She reached in the drawer to pull out a pot holder as he carried the pot to the sink. He returned with the pot of noodles drained of the water and set it down on the potholder. He gave her an apologetic smile and gave her a sheepish look. “Sorry,”
“No problem,” she said, looking down at the red sauce that was beginning to splatter. She could feel his eyes on her as she silently continued to stir. Her mind was still wandering to their previous conversation. What she wouldn’t give for an opportunity to go back to Metropolis and be of more help to the investigation to bring Lex down. She knew if she did, she was putting her life at risk, but she also knew they probably wouldn’t have lost John Black if she had been involved from the beginning.
“Do you want to talk about it?” Clark asked slowly.
She remained silent, unwilling to acknowledge the question, fearful that if she did, she wouldn’t be able to bury the resentment that threatened to take over. He had no idea how good he had it. At least he had a way to reach out to his parents and friends. She couldn’t even pick up the phone and call her sister because it might put a target on Lucy’s back.
For the longest time, Lucy had been her best friend and confidante. Even throughout some of the ups and downs with Lucy moving across the country and then going with dad on the doctors without borders mission she had at least had a way to call. Now she didn’t even have that. She didn’t realize how much she relied on that connection to help her through the daily grind until it had been taken from her.
“Lois?” Clark placed a hand on her shoulder and turned her toward him.
She looked away, refusing to look back at him. “Um, food should be ready soon.” She caught a glimpse of his concerned expression and decided to just bite the bullet. He was always good at telling when something was bothering her and he never could leave her alone when he knew she was upset. Too many times she recalled him showing up with ice cream or pizza after a lead went sour or Perry had killed a story.
Clark had a way about him that made you want to tell him your deepest secrets before you even realized what was happening. He had a way of putting you at ease and scaring off any potential bad mood. She let out a sigh and turned the rest of her body toward him with a frown, “I try not to think about it. The fact that no one outside of you and a few select people from the Planet know I’m alive.”
She heard her voice crack, and she looked down, feeling the weight from the words that hung in the air. Then she found herself admitting to the fear she’d kept buried inside for the past few months, “I don’t even know if my family knows.”
“I’m sorry,” Clark said, looking down.
“It is what it is,” she shrugged it off, looking away as she tried not to focus on the vulnerability she’d just exposed to him. ‘Why do I keep doing this?’ He took a step closer, and she felt her insides flutter, simultaneously trying to suppress the need to be closer, and run away as the distance between them closed.
His hand moved to her chin, tilting her face toward him and she felt the warmth of his palm against her cheek, “It’s not going to be like this forever,”
“I know,” she replied hoarsely, taking a step back in order to reclaim her bearings. He was too close. “That’s the problem.”
Clark’s face went from confused to lost in a matter of seconds as he stared back at her. The sound of a car door slamming came from outside and her she felt her chest tighten in panic. Who could be in their driveway? She looked around the kitchen, searching for a weapon of some sort to ward off any potential attacker. She quickly turned the knob to the burner off and pushed the pan back toward the wall.
“Wait here,” he instructed, moving toward the living room.
Lois stood there for a moment, searching for something to use as a potential weapon. She finally settled on the wooden cutting board and followed Clark into the living room. She turned the corner and saw a man with rugged jeans and a gray t-shirt standing in the doorway talking to Clark.
“…didn’t mean to startle you,” the man held up a black wallet, “You left this in the truck.”
Lois breathed a sigh of relief, setting down the cutting board when she realized it wasn’t an intruder but a good Samaritan returning Clark’s wallet. How he’d lost it in the first place, she wasn’t sure.
“Uh, thanks,” Clark said, taking the wallet from him.
“Truck?” Lois asked curiously, walking up behind them and making her presence known.
“Colin here was helping me get my bull-headed self out of the mud yesterday.” The man explained. “I gave him a ride back after, and I guess this fell out in the shuffle. Found it this morning.”
She glanced at Clark with a questioning gaze, and he shrugged, “It was nothing,”
Lois still felt uneasy that this stranger now knew where they lived and they knew absolutely nothing about him. Thankfully his identification information had been confiscated when Davenport had been here, but if it hadn’t, they would have been having a completely different conversation.
“Well, thank you, Mister…?”
“Oh, you can call me Nate,” the man said, extending his hand to shake hers.
She stared at it and took his hand reluctantly, “Nate,”
“Well, thank you, Nate, you certainly saved my, um…” she swallowed hard uncertain if she could bring herself to summon the word up without giving herself away. She had to. She knew she did. They had to be believable and fit in or risk standing out and be forced to move again. “…husband from a trip to the DMV and every bank in the area.”
“Don’t I know it,” Nate laughed, shaking his head. “That trip is never fun.” He looked around the living room behind them, “You two must be new here. I don’t remember seeing you at the SummerFest last month.”
“Well, we’ve been, uh, settling in,” Clark said lamely, placing an arm around her waist and pulling her close enough just to be believable as a couple to Nate.
“Ah, newlyweds, huh?” Nate grinned. Lois was about to ask where he got an idea like that but thought better of it as Nate continued his one-sided monologue on what he assumed to be her and Clark’s story, “You have that new love air about you. Still, in the honeymoon phase and haven’t had that first big fight,” He chuckled more to himself than anyone and Lois suppressed her gut instincts that wanted to argue back with this Nate.
She wanted to tell him he had no idea what he was talking about. Though they were playing a part here in this small town, she still felt angry when anyone tried to assume anything about her. Playing the role of Leila Kane in this mock relationship made her fight against her instincts to correct the false assumptions and tell Nate how it was. She had to hide so much of herself she wondered if there was going to be anything left of her old self when all this was over.
Nate looked around and nodded, “You definitely picked the right place to start out. Yeah, moving can be a pain,” Nate nodded good-naturedly. “Well, don’t miss the end of season festival. Town always pulls out all the stops for the Harvest Festival. Lots of great food.” He patted his belly for emphasis.
“We’ll keep that in mind,” Lois forced a smile, glancing at the open door behind Nate. How long was he going to sit here and try to make chit-chat? What was it with these people and this innate need to talk to strangers?
“Well, once you get settled you should give the town a good tour,” Nate said with a smile. “It’s a lot of old friends and some local entertainment. Don’t be a stranger,” he patted Clark on the shoulder.
Lois felt her stomach flutter as Clark leaned closer to her. He was too close. Incredibly too close right now. “Sounds fun,”
Nate nodded, seeming to take a step to leave before he turned back to Clark and asked, “Hey, you got any background in construction?”
Clark’s eyes shifted slightly, and he shrugged, “Some carpentry and basic framing yeah.” He then asked the question she was thinking before she could voice it, “Why?”
“I got a team I’m trying to put together to restore that old bridge by York.” He explained nonchalantly. “I could use some guys not afraid of a little hard work.” He then quickly added, “If you’re interested that is,”
Clark looked back at Lois silently asking permission. She shrugged her shoulders, unsure how good of an idea it was for him to be swinging hammers with the way his hands had been lately. He then nodded and turned back to Nate, “I might be interested,”
Nate pulled out a card and headed it to him, “Call that number on Monday. Sheila’ll get you squared away. Crew does pick up at six am sharp.” He grinned back at them and turned to leave, nodding a silent goodbye when his mobile phone began to ring, and he turned to answer it.
“What just happened?” Lois asked sighing in relief when she felt Clark’s hand leave her waist.
“I think I just got offered a job,” Clark said with a bemused expression.
“Is that a good idea?” Lois ventured cautiously.
“Well, we’re supposed to be normal, right?” he shrugged.
***
TBC...
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