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Joined: May 2005
Posts: 1,662
Merriwether
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OP
Merriwether
Joined: May 2005
Posts: 1,662 |
Wonderful ending, but now there's no more. You just had to tantalize us with that last part didn't you? You better be able to back it up with a sequel. I can't wait
I think, therefore, I get bananas.
When in doubt, think about time travel conundrums. You'll confuse yourself so you can forget what you were in doubt about.
What's the difference between ignorance, apathy, and ambivalence? I don't know and I don't care one way or the other.
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Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 234
Hack from Nowheresville
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Hack from Nowheresville
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 234 |
Whoa! Holy surprise-ness. Wasn't expecting such a quick wrap-up, here. But I do smell a sequel, yes? That is good... I like the fading memory thing. Otherwise, there is absolutely no way that you could wrap this up as quickly as you did--those kind of memories last a lifetime. I was a little suspicious about this paragraph, though : ...crest of his pelvic bone– he didn’t remember being hurt there. And the spot on his arm where they’d had to lay open the skin and muscles to set one of the bones itched badly under wrappings. Do I sense something alluding to another certain torture story being written right now? That sounds like blood samples and a bone marrow sample (taken from the correct place, this time) unless I am just going mad! Great job on this story! It was intense, well written, and gripping. Thanks for taking the challenge and helping inspire me to start my own fanfiction piece. You're the greatest! SmirkyRaven
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Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 1,483
Top Banana
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Top Banana
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 1,483 |
quote: ...crest of his pelvic bone– he didn’t remember being hurt there. And the spot on his arm where they’d had to lay open the skin and muscles to set one of the bones itched badly under wrappings.
Do I sense something alluding to another certain torture story being written right now? That sounds like blood samples and a bone marrow sample (taken from the correct place, this time) unless I am just going mad! bone marrow samples, muscle samples, skin samples, liver & lung tissue if he was looking for needle marks. Hey, SHADO ain't dumb, they got another alien to study for a while. The memory loss drug is actually UFO canon. It was developed to erase the memories of civilians who were caught in UFO incidents (A precurser to the MIB memory gizzy.) As to a sequel - Well, Straker's sort of expecting trouble from the New Kryptonians, but a sequel would be explaining why SHADO didn't act to take out Nor when he first attacked Smallville. So I have to come up with a good reason AND a plot line that works.
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Joined: Jul 2006
Posts: 1,883
Merriwether
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Merriwether
Joined: Jul 2006
Posts: 1,883 |
"I honestly believe they intended to start cutting me open." Clark, just be thankful you aren't the Clark in SmirkyRaven's story. They *did* cut him open! But Dandello is a kinder mistress. (Just teasing you, Raven ) “They didn’t take you by mistake, did they?” It was a statement, not a question. “They knew exactly who they were hurting. They just didn’t know it was really Clark Kent.” Finally! “I love you, you know.”
“I know,” she said. “I warned you not to.” Good stuff! “We’ve already started,” Straker said, clearing away their empty coffee cups. “By the time you reach Smallville, all this will be little more than a bad dream.” High-handed, a little? “Did you figure out who that Kal-El person was they thought you were?” WHAT??? Oh, no you didn't!!! "I do know we only have about two years until he comes of age according to their law and they come for him. I hope we’ll be ready.” Huh. This guy is just full of suprises! This was a good story, Dandello. Thank you for the time and effort you put into giving us new tale to read!
lisa in the sky with diamonds
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Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 1,483
Top Banana
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Top Banana
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 1,483 |
Yup, that's Commander Straker. A high handed SOB in charge of protecting the planet.
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Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 546
Columnist
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Columnist
Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 546 |
A very good story from beginning to end. At the end, when Lois asked Clark if he discovered who was Kal-El, I screamed of frustration in front of my computer. And I agree that it needs a sequel. The story was great but tooshort to my taste. I want more
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Joined: Apr 2003
Posts: 1,999
Merriwether
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Merriwether
Joined: Apr 2003
Posts: 1,999 |
Well done. A very intense and emotion-filled story.
It was nice to see that Lois was this fiercely protective and willing to put herself at such risk to help out just Clark.
I'm not sure that 'my' Lois could have brought herself to actually kill Clark in order to save him from the torture, but it does say something about her strength of resolve.
Overall, a very powerful story.
Tank (who isn't bothered by the 'reset' of the relationship by the magical memory drug)
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Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 3,060 Likes: 20
Pulitzer
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Pulitzer
Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 3,060 Likes: 20 |
~•~
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Joined: May 2006
Posts: 1,065
Top Banana
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Top Banana
Joined: May 2006
Posts: 1,065 |
I wanted to pop in and say that I really enjoyed the story. I am so glad you shared it with us. I found it interesting that you took away their memories... but somehow I think you have something else in store for us with that ending. I can't wait to see if you bring us more.
Angry Clark: CLARK SMASH! Lois: Ork!
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