Lois & Clark Forums Forums Fan Fiction Lois & Clark Fanfic Comments: An Extraordinary Man II (30/31)

Here is the penultimate part. Please tell me what you think. My beta <waves to Jenni> did raise one issue here, but I don't know that there is anything I can do about it. I'm curious to see whether (1) you guys notice anything amiss and (2) if you do, whether you can come up with any decent solutions.

Chris

Well, CJ didn't bounce but you didn't kill him either, so I guess I can forgive you And thanks for letting H.G. Wells reassure Lois. I think it's perfectly plausible that CJ has some traces of powers all his own, enough to save his life.

Now let's get CJ out of the hospital, okay?

PJ

Chris
good segment
ditto Pam - let's get CJ out of the hospital.
more soon please
merry

Chris, good instalment.

I like the fact that CJ's actions did have consequences. You don't face down a gun weilding maniac out to kill you and yours and not have consequences.

I'm a sucker for hospital waiting room scenes. It gives your characters lots of time to run an emotional gambit, from relief to abject worry and back to relief once they get some 'good' news. I'm surprized that the doctor couldn't have at least given Lois a 'given time, he should recover fully' instead of the more cryptic, we've made him comfortable.

One minor point of contention for me. Lois, rightly goes into a tirade about CJ flying into the path of Lex's bullet. She rants about how he could have been killed, as she should because she'd thinking about him. His assertion that since he had somehow gotten his flying power back that he might have assumed that he'd have his invulnerability back also lessens the impact of what he did. In essence he's telling Lois that he wasn't really risking anything in trying to save her. It makes what he did seem less heroic and less self-sacrificing to save the woman he loves.

You need to add a sentence or two after that conversation having Clark tell Lois that he would have done the same thing even if he'd known that he was completely vulnerable. After all, he'd think that her life was more important than his own.

Good story, decent wham.

Tank (who supposes that the final part will be filled with all that 'yucky' waffy stuff)

Hi,

Great piece.

MAF

Whew! Huge sigh of relief!

Very, very well done, Chris! So Luthor's dead, and CJ's going to be okay. I do like the way you explained his residual powers - very nice touch!

And I also noticed your little cameo in there - your favourite ER doctor, yes? Even though I don't watch ER, I recognised what you were doing - it was that 'extraordinarily good-looking' bit which alerted me first. Not that I think Lois would have eyes for any other man but CJ right now!

Okay, so what do you have for us in part 31? And then what about EMIII?


Wendy

Chris

WOW! A superb part!

I certainly hope so! I'm looking forward to reading the next part.

Tricia

Pam and Merry: CJ will leave the hospital in part 31. I can tell you that much without spoiling the ending... I think.

Tank: Anyone would think that you liked, angst!

As for CJ's answer cheapening his actions... I've been thinking about that. While I take your point, I'm not sure that I can see a way to insert the sentences easily. Still, that's my problem.

Yes, there is more 'yucky' stuff to come... but that isn't all in part 31.

Maria: CJ is an assistant DA. My understanding is that DA is an elected position, so if I wanted him to be a career prosector, he had to be an assistant District Attorney. (Anyone out there want to confirm or correct this for me?)

Not sure how Lois explained CJ's entry into the apartment. How about he came in via the fire escape? That's close enough to the truth, I suppose, and it's not as though Luthor is in any position to contradict her.

As for where Henderson is? Again, I don't know. Maybe the message got garbled between Mayson and the police, or maybe Henderson wasn't available.

Read part 31...

Wendy: Glad you approve!

Uh, yeah, you caught the cameo, right enough. I actually wrote that part of the story very early on -- and before I wrote to a thread on these boards about how much I didn't like cameos. Given my anti-cameo stance, I was tempted to change the description here. However, I thought that nobody would pick up on it, so that I might as well be lazy and leave it in.

Just goes to show, doesn't it!

AAAARRRGGHH!!!!!!!

Tricia: thank you as always for the comments.

Indeed, thank you, one and all. Appreciated!

Chris (off to post part 31)

Coming in late, as always.

I agree with Wendy. What about EMIII? CJ is definitely an incarnation of Clark that deserves a trilogy, at least!

Nan