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Wrong Place, Wrong Time, Wrong Clark TOC can be found HereSorry, about the short part, but I just couldn't *not* end it on such a delicious cliffy.  , and most of all to my wonderful and inspiring Betas who have stuck with me through thick and thin, IolantheAlias and Mrs. Luthor (and an extra shout out to my non-offical Beta, John!  ) I couldn't have made it this far without any of you. Thank you. Okay, you can now throw your tomatoes  ... um... post your comments.
Last edited by VirginiaR; 05/13/14 10:53 AM. Reason: Added Link
VirginiaR.
"On the long road, take small steps." -- Jor-el, "The Foundling"
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"clearly there is a lack of understanding between those two... he speaks Lunkheadanian and she Stubbornanian" -- chelo.
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Pulitzer
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“I was the decoy girlfriend for his mother, because he could never be interested in somebody ‘as starchly conservative as me and his mother’.” This makes a lot more sense. The way it happened in canon never added up. Although I have to wonder how early she knew. “I’m over him too, Clark. Please, I’m fine.” I think she protests too much. “You said that your life had no value, and that no one would miss you,” he reminded her. It is good to see that Clark really cares aboutr Cat. “I know,” he said, running his thumb down her cheek. “Then, suddenly, you decided that you didn’t like the old you and wanted to be someone else, someone you thought a person could love. You didn’t feel like someone could love you for you, but only your body. So, since it was your body you felt you might as well offer it to the highest bidder.” I think this is the best explanation of the Arthur Chow episode yet.
John Pack Lambert
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Pulitzer
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“Don’t worry. Lois told him that you were cousins, and that put the whole ick factor into the possibility… well, for the rest of us,” he said. It is a little disconcerting that Lois no longer can clearly distinguish her visions from reality. Although since they are memories, maybe it makes sense. “Sooooooo, are you sure you’re the last son of Krypton?  that he told Cat the "last son of Krypton" detail before he told Lois. He paused as he heard the sounds of multiple sirens blaring, and he sighed. “Well, I guess, I’ll catch up with her later.”  an emergency keeping Clark from Lois again. “Thank God, you’re back. You told me not to use the phone or go out, so I had no way of contacting you,” that Clark is not here. Clark is supposed to be in this scene. He looked at her with grinning skepticism. “I know. Superman? I am surprised it still is that. She was glad at least that Clark hadn’t been there to hear that. Clark:At least it isn't "Lex". Yes, passwords should not be so simple. Maybe she could make it the date she figured out Clark was Superman: 02281994. All number passwords are not really that good either, but I guess not many people would know how to figure this one out. “I can see why you didn’t take the stand in your own defense,” Lois said, taking another bite of her pizza. She does have a good point. That threat alone would not have gone over well with the jury. “That makes sense. The man was about to lose everything. Why not take everyone’s system down with him?” The wording of this line seems a bit odd. There are a lot of different systems. I gtuess though it does work gramattically. She took another bite of pizza, wondering where her partner was. there are too many parts here without Clark and Lois interacting. Though she’d deny it if anyone ever claimed it to be true, Clark was much more computer savvy than she was and would know what kind of questions to ask. Is this helped by him being from the future? Although I guess this is how things seemed in canon, especially at the start of season 2. Of course, Lois not knowing what an acrostic was just seemed a little too much in the Lois ignorance field. “I could be arrested just for ‘harboring’ you in my apartment, and you want me to break you into Met. U.’s computer lab?” I always assumed Metropilis University and Metropolis University of Technology were two different institutions, so it seems odd to use the two names interchanably. I guess they might be one place which people varry how they refer to, but it seems odd. thank you for telling Jimmy that we’re cousins, I'm in shock. They are being civil too each other. “Yeah, you know him. He hears sirens and takes off running. Kind of like you, only without the doggy drool. On the plus side, we’ll probably have a bright and shiny Superman story for our front page tomorrow,” Cat said. At least Lois now knows why Clark is not here. Still that he isn't. “I’m not the ‘ho’ in this…” Are you so sure, Lois "bought with a watch" Lane? OK, maybe I am ripping on her too much for that, but still. “It’s part of an on-going investigation,” Lois said, reminding herself that she needed to talk to Superman about Daitch and soon. She should just tell Clark. “Lois, this is a computer virus, a very specific computer virus. You’re lucky that you didn’t download it to your computer,” he said. Intriguing, although how is he sure she did not download it? “Do you recognize anything about the virus that will help us pinpoint who wrote it?” Lois asked. “Does it have a signature that you’re familiar with?” I hope they can link it to Lex. “It’s not a bomb, Lois,” he said, shaking his head. “Not all viruses have signatures that can be matched a certain programmer or hacker.” I was hoping they would make some progress. “It might as well have been a bomb,” she corrected. “For all the damage it could have caused.” For all the damage it did cause, Lois added silently. But without it Lois still might be in the dark. OK, in theory not, in theory Clark would have told her that he was Superman if the astroid had not intervened, but still. Lois bent down and pulled the videotape Jimmy had made from her briefcase. “I want to show you something. It won’t be easy to watch, but maybe you’ll recognize… someone,” she suggested, Why didn't they ever show this to Eugene in canon? “Ji… my researcher got distracted,” she clarified. Multiple James Olsens is very confusing. “That’s Harrison!” Eugene gasped, grabbing the remote from Lois,  Clark returned and hid Eugene on the ledge? Lois sputtered, and Clark was conveniently late. Why does she expect Clark to trust her, if she does not trust Clark? He had a totally legitimate reason to be late. Things seem to be getting more and more strained between them. She hated to blame him, but he was the only other person who knew that Eugene was here. The "cable technician" saw Eugene. Maybe he then saw a story about the fugitive, and put two and two together. “We’ve got him!” they called, and Lois winced. I guess I was wrong about Clark returning. The two men returned, each holding onto one of Eugene’s elbows, and Detective Reed’s long nails bit into Lois’s arm. Eugene’s face was red on one side as if he had belly flopped out of the bathtub and landed face-first on the floor. Must not have been a very detailed search. “It is if the ‘new romance’ is her dead husband,” Lois retorted. Lois should have pushed this angle more. “You have the right to remain silent; although, knowing you, I doubt it will be possible…” Well, Reid seems to be keeping up her snipping at Lois. This is very sad that Lois is mistrusting Clark, Clark is mistrusting Lois and I have no idea how things are going to impove. I really hope we get some scenes of Lois and Clark together soon.
John Pack Lambert
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I was hoping that Superman would have come in the bedroom window and gotten Eugene out in time. Despite being disappointed that she's been arrested, I think on some level I'm pleased to see Lois having to deal with the consequences of her actions. I like Clark's friendship with Cat, how he genuinely cares about her and takes the time to make sure that she's ok. John said: Of course, Lois not knowing what an acrostic was just seemed a little too much in the Lois ignorance field. I agree. Don't journalism majors take lots of English classes? Shouldn't she be aware of various literary devices and whatnot? I think they wrote it that way to be able to explain it to the audience, but Lois should have known this. They should have had Lois saying, "An acrostic?" and then Clark explains it, and she snaps, "I know what an acrostic is, Clark, I'm just surprised that the graffitiers do."
"It is a remarkable dichotomy. In many ways, Clark is the most human of us all. Then...he shoots fire from the skies, and it is difficult not to think of him as a god. And how fortunate we all are that it does not occur to him." -Batman (in Superman/Batman #3 by Jeph Loeb)
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Merriwether
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Love Clark being a good friend and checking up on Cat. I like your more in-depth portrayal of her.
Joan
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John: Thank you for the FDK. Sorry about the delayed response. I'm pretty much done with 122, so time to reward myself. This makes a lot more sense. The way it happened in canon never added up. Although I have to wonder how early she knew. How early Cat knew about Chow's other girlfriend? When he told her about it the night they eloped. (More on this later). CAT: “I’m over him too, Clark. Please, I’m fine.”
JOHN: I think she protests too much. A bit. It is good to see that Clark really cares about Cat. Yea! John isn't blaming Cat for Lois's arrest! I think this is the best explanation of the Arthur Chow episode yet. Thank you. Cat's motivations in many of the episodes made no sense so I'm trying to fix that. It is a little disconcerting that Lois no longer can clearly distinguish her visions from reality. Although since they are memories, maybe it makes sense. It's been a long month. <sad> that he told Cat the "last son of Krypton" detail before he told Lois. Yes, well, he also told her CK=SM before Lois. an emergency keeping Clark from Lois again. Welcome to Metropolis! <sad> that Clark is not here. Clark is supposed to be in this scene.
VirginiaR.
"On the long road, take small steps." -- Jor-el, "The Foundling"
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"clearly there is a lack of understanding between those two... he speaks Lunkheadanian and she Stubbornanian" -- chelo.
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mrsMxyzptlk: Thanks for commenting.  I was hoping that Superman would have come in the bedroom window and gotten Eugene out in time. Despite being disappointed that she's been arrested, I think on some level I'm pleased to see Lois having to deal with the consequences of her actions. Well, I didn't want to follow canon too much. I like Clark's friendship with Cat, how he genuinely cares about her and takes the time to make sure that she's ok. See, Clark's a good around guy. They should have had Lois saying, "An acrostic?" and then Clark explains it, and she snaps, "I know what an acrostic is, Clark, I'm just surprised that the graffitiers do."
VirginiaR.
"On the long road, take small steps." -- Jor-el, "The Foundling"
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"clearly there is a lack of understanding between those two... he speaks Lunkheadanian and she Stubbornanian" -- chelo.
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Pulitzer
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How early Cat knew about Chow's other girlfriend? When he told her about it the night they eloped. (More on this later). So Cat di not realize she was acting as a cover for Chow's other girlfriend. CAT: “I’m over him too, Clark. Please, I’m fine.”
JOHN: I think she protests too much. A bit. about lousy reasons he left Lois open to Dan's attacks. Um... computer expert? Spent all day playing on Lois's computer? Would have found it if she had. I guess that makes sense. I hope they can link it to Lex. Wouldn't that by nice and tidy?  Hmm, if this story did nice and tidy it would not be so long. I'm going with "ruse" to get Eugene to be the scapegoat for Harrison's murder. I figured it was too. It seemed the whole Eugene/Lena setup was part of a grand plot to have Eugene charged with murder. I figured it couldn't only be Claude's fault that she wanted to wait until marriage. I guess I always focused on Clark being the main force behind waiting, but actually from the dialogue in "Virtually Destroyed" it does seem it is largely Lois' idea, although in "Super Mann" it seems it is Jimmy's fault (at least Lois and Clark were making lots of progress before Jimmy returned with his not all that helpful observations). Lois knew something wasn’t right. Clark should have been here.
JOHN: Why, Cat told her he was helping with an emergency. There are all sorts of reasons why he could have been delayed. Psychic feeling. I guess that makes sense. Since she does not know their source this might work against Clark more in the future. She doesn't really mean that. What else is she supposed to say when a detective notices she has an expensive looking watch? I got this from one of my sources? Why not, it is not illegal to accept gifts from sources. I got this from this guy I'm investigating? Clark:Better than calling him a friend. Anyway, she could have at least used the more neutral term "acquaintance". Lois is just panicking here and Clark's an easy target. Lois tends to blame Clark first until she has time to think about it. He did lie (and still is) to her about being Superman, so maybe he would do something like this to teach her a lesson about breaking the law. Clark:Not after I swore secrecy on the lives of our grandchildren. Lois:What makes you think we will have grandchildren. Clark:Lois, you are the one who said "our". Lois:  O, I forgot I said it that way. Or maybe someone at the office overheard her and Clark talking about Eugene? At least in canon they did it totally in the open, so that was entirely possible. I really think they were way too open with lots of what they said in canon. Must not have been a very detailed search. They didn't seem to spend much time looking in canon either. Hiding on the ledge really should not have worked.
John Pack Lambert
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Sorry, about the short part, but I just couldn't *not* end it on such a delicious cliffy. Hey! Oh, right. Still got two months worth of reading available. Okay, you can now throw your tomatoes [Big Grin] ... um... post your comments. /uses needle to scratch comments into tomato's skin/ “Yes!” she said a tad forcefully. “If you had asked Perry, you would’ve known that I had sent in my story about Arthur’s marriage last night. Oh? “Old sleazebag marries skanky stripper”? LOIS: Lex got married to his secretary? MRS. COX: *Personal* assistant. because he wanted me to break the story in the Daily Planet. Nice. Classy. And yet, the Met Star still beat them senseless with it. LINDA: Well, I did know it first. /flashes her new ice before placing another bet at roulette/ “I was the decoy girlfriend for his mother, because he could never be interested in somebody ‘as starchly conservative as me and his mother’.” So, he met a stuck-up Cat, figured she’d make a great beard, dated her in public while getting it on in private with some two-bit hooker- LINDA: Hey! -and then told Cat right before he left to be betrothed by Elvis. PERRY: Hey! Really classy, indeed. LEX: At least, *I* never promise them marriage unless I actually do plan to lock them up in a cage. “I guess I wasn’t the only one hiding their true personality.” It must be in the water in Metropolis. Either that or it’s some Kryptonian disease Superman brought with him from back home. “Water under the bridge,” she replied, only weaker.
“You sobbed for over ten minutes.” Cat shrugged and started to pick at the belt of her robe. I almost expected her to drop the robe. You didn’t feel like someone could love you for you, but only your body. So, since it was your body you felt you might as well offer it to the highest bidder.” Did he just call her a prostitute? CAT: ![[Linked Image]](http://cosgan.de/images/midi/froehlich/d025.gif) LOIS: ![[Linked Image]](http://cosgan.de/images/smilie/traurig/k055.gif) Don’t worry, he does that with all the women in his life. Comes from his mother having been a concubine. He thinks it’s an endearment. “The first is a woman, a married woman,” Clark reminded her with a sharp look. So, Cat could have made concubine? “But I knew you were in serious trouble, in the deepest darkest pit of despair, when you impersonated Lois.”
Her gaze jumped to his in surprise.
“I’ve never heard a call for help any louder, Cat,” he said, and then he leaned forward conspiratorially. “And I’m Superman.”  I think he is a tad over the top, there. “Cat, you’re intelligent, sweet, thoughtful, kind, and, as Jimmy said earlier, ‘smoking hot’.” Maybe he shouldn’t repeat that where Lois can overhear. “Ugh. Don’t remind me,” she said, looking to the ceiling. “I’d feel like I would be robbing the cradle with that puppy.” Aww, I’m sure he’d appreciate the tutelage. “Maybe I should give up on men altogether,” she said, nibbling on her bottom lip in contemplation. So, it’s women now? “You don’t happen to have a brother, do you?” she asked innocently. No, but his wife’s got a body-guard/boy-toy. Maybe she’d be willing to share? I was afraid that I was about to lose my best friend.” Women really die by the dozen around him, don’t they? “Thanks for putting ‘intelligent’ first,” Cat said with a wink. Awwww “I’ve straightened out your files and gave you a simpler directory,” he said, removing his glasses. ![[Linked Image]](http://cosgan.de/images/smilie/verschiedene/d020.gif) “You… those… those are personal files!” she exclaimed. “I have a password.”
He looked at her with grinning skepticism. “I know. Superman? It wasn’t too tough to figure out,” Eugene said, sitting back down at her computer. Nobody with such an easy password can mean to actually protect their files. RALPH: Same goes for chicks in hook-up get-up. LEX: Or when they undress in front of a high-def surveillance installation. CLARK: ![[Linked Image]](http://cosgan.de/images/midi/konfus/a050.gif) She had set that password months ago, to hide her novel from her sister. LUCY: Hot stuff in there. Never knew my big Sis actually knew those moves. “Eugene, there are more important things going on than a temporary computer slow-down,” Never had to work with a dial-up landline instead of a cable internet connection, huh? A virus programmed to destroy all other software programs, a poly-morphic, encrypted virus,” Eugene said. ![[Linked Image]](http://scm-l3.technorati.com/11/04/20/32053/skynet.jpg)
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“How bad can this virus make things?”
“In a nation completely dependent on computers? It could mean disaster,” he said. /points at nuclear power plants going critical and dams releasing all the water from their reservoirs. Power grids shutting down in cascade failure. Gasoline supply stopping. Food delivery stopping. Telecommunications stopping. Civilization as we know it will end. ![[Linked Image]](http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/7/74/Postman_ver3.jpg) It’s not *that* bad. ![[Linked Image]](http://thatwasjunk.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/08/planet-of-the-apes-1968-300x225.jpg) Ooooh. Oooh. Eeeeh! Eeeeeh! Uuuuh. APE: Those humans. They don’t even know how to speak. The world wouldn’t come to the end because of a few computer slowdowns. America had run just fine without computers for several hundred years; surely, it wouldn’t crash and burn before they could clear Eugene of murdering his boss. ![[Linked Image]](http://cosgan.de/images/smilie/frech/g025.gif) “Tell me about it. Now, if they’d only send Ralph out to be fixed,” Lois replied. Maybe if she told Lex that the horndog made a pass at her in the supply closet. “Yeah, you know him. He hears sirens and takes off running. Kind of like you, only without the doggy drool.  Michael
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Originally posted by John Lambert:
JOHN: How early Cat knew about Chow's other girlfriend? When he told her about it the night they eloped. (More on this later).
EW: So Cat di not realize she was acting as a cover for Chow's other girlfriend. Nope, poor Cat wasn't in on the ruse. Wait, why would I do that? Did Clark tell Cat that Lois was hiding Lauderman? I forgot about that. Hmm, no the question is will Clark blame Cat? Why would you do that? Um... because according to you Cat and Herb are the root to all evil not perpetrated by Lex Luthor? Did Cat know about Lauderman? No, not officially but Clark and Lois had discussed it at work, albeit carefully, but who knows who could have overheard them. No, Cat didn't know about Lauderman and, personally, didn't care to know. Clark has no reason to blame Cat; she has enough of her own troubles at the moment. EW: She hasn't changed it since before she knew... well, since the previous summer actually.
JOHN: Actually I am surprised it survived her breakup with Superman in this continuity. That would have really been an expected change. Lois has been too busy to think up new passwords, although for about three hours or so before eating pasta with Clark, she did consider 'KillSuperman' but then she realized he was suffering just as much as she was, it just wasn't meant to be.  <<just joking about the password suggestion BTW>> EW: It's a mixture of Lois not being computer savvy from Madame Ex (although, she seemed to do okay in FlyHard), and a bit of Clark having 2 years of extra computer knowledge and a photographic memory. I knew about Acrostics before I saw Madame Ex, too, but I didn't know what they were called. This is the explanation I use to Lois not knowing the official term.
JOHN: Hmm, maybe that works. It still seemed odd to me that she would not know the term. I don't know, Lois seemed to come off not knowing much about anything in that episode. I guess her saving Superman near the end was somewhat of a redemption, but even then it did not call on any extra Lois spunk. Now if she had then been the one to stop Ariana's escape by quick action instead of an unreasonably fast recovered Superman, I could have lived with it. Perhaps someone needs to re-write Madame Ex with Clark still suffering from Green K poisoning and Lois chasing Ari and the double down the street. (It wasn't like they were going REALLY fast.) Maybe Jimmy could have caught a photo of Ari and the double leaving the building and then tried to flag them down, only to have Lois run out a few minutes later. Having gotten shots of both, they could prove that Lois has been set up. SM recovered way too fast in that episode for my liking, especially since he had BEEN SHOT and the Green K had been in his body! It took him 3 days to recover from GGGoH! JOHN: I hope they can link it to Lex.
EW: Wouldn't that by nice and tidy? [I'm not saying a word]
JOHN: Hmm, if this story did nice and tidy it would not be so long. So true. I do promise some nice and tidy things in the future. Clark:Not after I swore secrecy on the lives of our grandchildren.
Lois:What makes you think we will have grandchildren.
Clark:Lois, you are the one who said "our".
Lois: [blushing] O, I forgot I said it that way.  At least in canon they did it totally in the open, so that was entirely possible. I really think they were way too open with lots of what they said in canon. One of the reasons I poke fun at them for doing so, in my stories.
VirginiaR.
"On the long road, take small steps." -- Jor-el, "The Foundling"
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"clearly there is a lack of understanding between those two... he speaks Lunkheadanian and she Stubbornanian" -- chelo.
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Darth Michael: Nice. Classy. And yet, the Met Star still beat them senseless with it.
LINDA: Well, I did know it first. /flashes her new ice before placing another bet at roulette/ Met Star didn't know first. DP just didn't consider it front page news. <<And they wonder about circulation problems>> PERRY: It was gossip! Who cares who the guy marries? It's not like it was Lex Luthor. LEX: Aww. Perry, it's so nice to know that my marriage will be front page news. LOIS: Who are you marrying? LEX: It's a surprise. MRS. COX: Didn't you get the press release? Me! So, he met a stuck-up Cat, figured she’d make a great beard, dated her in public while getting it on in private with some two-bit hooker-
LINDA: Hey!
-and then told Cat right before he left to be betrothed by Elvis.
PERRY: Hey!
Really classy, indeed.
LEX: At least, *I* never promise them marriage unless I actually do plan to lock them up in a cage. Well put! It must be in the water in Metropolis. Either that or it’s some Kryptonian disease Superman brought with him from back home. CLARK: Are you saying my folks sent me from Krypton because I was diseased? I almost expected her to drop the robe. Now, you know how depressed she really is. She's not hitting on Clark... as much. You didn’t feel like someone could love you for you, but only your body. So, since it was your body you felt you might as well offer it to the highest bidder.”
Did he just call her a prostitute?
CAT: [yes]
LOIS: Don’t worry, he does that with all the women in his life. Comes from his mother having been a concubine. He thinks it’s an endearment. LARA: I wasn't a concubine! JOR-EL: Actually, Lara... LARA: <<smacks Jor-El with 2x4>> I *wasn't* a concubine. HE was. JOR-EL:  Whatever she said. CLARK: Phew. I was worried there for a minute. Wait. What? “I’ve never heard a call for help any louder, Cat,” he said, and then he leaned forward conspiratorially. “And I’m Superman.”
ER: I think he is a tad over the top, there. I thought it was funny. Maybe he shouldn’t repeat that where Lois can overhear. But Lois already heard what Jimmy call Cat. Aww, I’m sure he’d appreciate the tutelage. Still doesn't mean she'd want to be the teacher. No, but his wife’s got a body-guard/boy-toy. Maybe she’d be willing to share? CHING: [considers this] Okay, I'm not busy. What are you doing after the wedding? CAT: Who's wedding? CHING: Um... Kal-El and Zara's wedding? CAT: Who? CHING: Kal... Clark's and Sara's wedding. LOIS: Who's Sara?  Women really die by the dozen around him, don’t they? Yes. LANA: I'm still alive! CLARK: Oh, lucky me. [Det. Reed finds Lauderman at a funeral. His own] LOIS: What? He *touched* my computer! Nobody with such an easy password can mean to actually protect their files.
RALPH: Same goes for chicks in hook-up get-up.
LEX: Or when they undress in front of a high-def surveillance installation.
CLARK: [Can't believe the intelligence of the human male mind] LOIS: You and me both, there, farmboy. LUCY: Hot stuff in there. Never knew my big Sis actually knew those moves. LOIS: Well, actually, most of it is mostly fantasy, built upon what I've read elsewhere and... wait. Hey! Never had to work with a dial-up landline instead of a cable internet connection, huh? Did they even HAVE cable internet in 1994? A virus programmed to destroy all other software programs, a poly-morphic, encrypted virus,” Eugene said.
[skynet] LEX: Well, that explains where Superman came from. CAT: Superman arrived naked? And *Nobody* told me?! 
VirginiaR.
"On the long road, take small steps." -- Jor-el, "The Foundling"
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"clearly there is a lack of understanding between those two... he speaks Lunkheadanian and she Stubbornanian" -- chelo.
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-- Continuation of Response to Michael's FDK -- /points at nuclear power plants going critical and dams releasing all the water from their reservoirs. Power grids shutting down in cascade failure. Gasoline supply stopping. Food delivery stopping. Telecommunications stopping. Civilization as we know it will end. LOIS: So, bad? Huh? [Postman Movie]
It’s not *that* bad. LOIS: Oh, okay. So, not as bad as a Kevin Costner movie. EW: /hears crickets/ Ooops? [planet-of-the-apes-1968 movie]
Ooooh. Oooh. Eeeeh! Eeeeeh! Uuuuh.
APE: Those humans. They don’t even know how to speak. LOIS: See, the same as today. Men acting like apes. I don't see what everyone is so worried about. ER: [Agrees wholeheartedly with Lois that a few computer slowdowns won't destroy the world] LOIS: I mean, it would be really stupid to put all our eggs in one basket. [later] LOIS: What do you mean the microwave won't work without power?! Maybe if she told Lex that the horndog made a pass at her in the supply closet. CLARK: /looks worried/ LOIS: But I don't want Lex to fix Clark, but RALPH! Oh, I get it. I'll just tell him it happened on the newsroom floor, that way I'll have plenty of witnesses. [later] PERRY: Lois, have you met your new intern? This is Ralphalinda. On the plus side, we’ll probably have a bright and shiny Superman story for our front page tomorrow,”
ER: Burn! (considering his previous epic fail) Um... Whom is Cat burning, here? Lois or Clark? ER: /cocks eyebrow/ [wonders if Lois downloaded internet porn again] LOIS: That wasn't me! LUCY: Don't look at me. JIMBO: Oh, that wasn't your laptop, Lucy. Sorry, Lois. /Eugene marks down an ‘F’ on the finals for one James Olsen/ The real reason Jimbo never finished college. LEX: /writes Asabi a Christmas bonus/ ASABI: But, sir, you had me outsource that to... LEX: /retracts Christmas bonus/ ASABI: Me and my big mouth. Same goes for bombs. Only question is how much effort the programmer puts into disguising his style. Which reminds me…it’s been ages since the last guess the author challenge. Has anyone seen the clippers we use to trim Lois’s hair to an appropriate length? LOIS: [grabs hair] Hey! I've just gotten my hair back to where it was at the beginning of this story. Actually, they only have proof that zombies do exist. And that blondes prefer zombies. LOIS: I've always suspected that about blondes. CAT: [nods in agreement] CLARK: My fiancée was a blonde. LOIS: Case and point. CLARK:  Book 2 is plugging along towards a definite conclusion [it's the little story which could]. Alt-Clark: What are you calling 'little' there?
VirginiaR.
"On the long road, take small steps." -- Jor-el, "The Foundling"
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"clearly there is a lack of understanding between those two... he speaks Lunkheadanian and she Stubbornanian" -- chelo.
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Joined: Apr 2007
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Boards Chief Administrator Nobel Peace Prize Winner
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Boards Chief Administrator Nobel Peace Prize Winner
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I have a few minutes before housekeeping returns to clean up my room, why not spend it answering FDK? Can’t really see a reason why not But soon you'll be caught up and there won't be that delicious buffer for you anymore. ![[Linked Image]](http://cosgan.de/images/midi/konfus/c075.gif) But it's so much harder to read them when they're dripping down my face. Hmm…yes, I can see how that could be considered a problem. LEX: Aww. Perry, it's so nice to know that my marriage will be front page news.
LOIS: Who are you marrying?
LEX: It's a surprise.
MRS. COX: Didn't you get the press release? Me! LEX: ![[Linked Image]](http://cosgan.de/images/midi/verschiedene/c050.gif) MRS. COX: DP-Headline: Lex Luthor shot dead during wedding by office help. CLARK: Are you saying my folks sent me from Krypton because I was diseased? ![[Linked Image]](http://cosgan.de/images/midi/frech/e045.gif) JOR-EL: We knew he would never be able to father the royal heir, so… Now, you know how depressed she really is. She's not hitting on Clark... as much. Poor thing. No wonder Clark worries about her offing herself. CLARK: Phew. I was worried there for a minute. Wait. What? No wonder Superman is portrayed as such a gigolo in the press. LOIS: But Lois already heard what Jimmy call Cat. Yeah, but not from Clark. LOIS: Who's Sara? <Is going to get The Watch> CLARK: So, wedding night’s off, then? LANA: I'm still alive!
CLARK: Oh, lucky me. TEMPUS: Did they even HAVE cable internet in 1994? Hmm…Good point… /whispers/ Single word, no hypen.
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Boards Chief Administrator Nobel Peace Prize Winner
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Boards Chief Administrator Nobel Peace Prize Winner
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LEX: Well, that explains where Superman came from.
CAT: Superman arrived naked? And *Nobody* told me?! [Splat] Lois and Clark’s alive and well together and Lois giving birth on the newsroom floor or while she’s help hostage in an elevator? Alt-Clark: What are you calling 'little' there? RACHEL: Michael
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Nobel Peace Prize Winner
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Darth Michael: Slowly but surely I'll catch up some day. EW: But soon you'll be caught up and there won't be that delicious buffer for you anymore.
MICHAEL: /terrified of having to read other people's short -- less than 100 part -- stories to tide him over between new parts/ There, there. LEX: Aww. Perry, it's so nice to know that my marriage will be front page news.
LOIS: Who are you marrying?
LEX: It's a surprise.
MRS. COX: Didn't you get the press release? Me!
LEX: [whispers to her the truth about her mistress status]
MRS. COX: [mad, she won't have access to all those billions for her new clothing line]
DP-Headline: Lex Luthor shot dead during wedding by office help. LOIS: /throws up her hands in disgust/ There goes MY investigation! CLARK: Are you saying my folks sent me from Krypton because I was diseased?
ER: /tells Clark the truth about Krypton/
JOR-EL: We knew he would never be able to father the royal heir, so… CLARK: Gee, thanks, folks. Poor thing. No wonder Clark worries about her offing herself. Exactly. CLARK: Phew. I was worried there for a minute. Wait. What? ER: No wonder Superman is portrayed as such a gigolo in the press. LOIS: CLARK: /note to self/ Don't anger Lois when she's on deadline or she'll make up Superman stories I can't refute. LANA: I'm still alive!
CLARK: Oh, lucky me.
TEMPUS: [loves irony] a poly-morphic
/whispers/ Single word, no hypen. You know I think I got that spelling from the Script. /hangs head in shame for not double checking the spelling from a script/ LEX: Well, that explains where Superman came from.
CAT: Superman arrived naked? And *Nobody* told me?! [Splat]
LOIS: See? I told you that Superman was the way way after. LOIS: See, the same as today. Men acting like apes. I don't see what everyone is so worried about.
ER: /points at women in cave-woman getup with bad hair and no makeup/ LOIS: Have you seen Cat lately? So, Lex not just fixed Ralph, but had him genetically merged with Linda? LINDA: Kill me. Kill me now. Even *I* have standards. ASABI: But, sir, you had me outsource that to...
LEX: /retracts Christmas bonus/
ASABI: Me and my big mouth.
ER: So much for the Indian software developer joke… Totally missed that one. Must have been that guy who works for LexCo who's pregnant wife almost got killed in the holdup at the electronics store. <the first time Lois and Clark saw each other after her faux breakup when he thought it was a real one> Raj Kashnush. ASABI: See, I outsourced it to another Indian! /points at rule stating that Lois’s head must be shorn once every 100 parts to prevent lice infestation/ Oh, dear, it has almost been 100 parts since I gave Lois that haircut. /goes to add reminder to my to-do list, notes that it's already there/ I haven't forgotten. /That first haircut was just a trim, so more of a red herring than a real haircut/ LOIS: Woman... Cat Woman! She must be after my watch!
BATMAN: I thought I wasn't supposed to be in this story.
CLARK: No, he wasn’t. This is the story where Superman hooks up with the mysterious feline from across the bay. LOIS: I was wondering about all the hairballs. I see he has high hopes for the Stockholm Syndrome. LEX: Lois and Clark’s alive and well together and Lois giving birth on the newsroom floor or while she’s help hostage in an elevator? Um... no. And I've been told by the spoilage police to not even drop any more hints than that.
VirginiaR.
"On the long road, take small steps." -- Jor-el, "The Foundling"
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"clearly there is a lack of understanding between those two... he speaks Lunkheadanian and she Stubbornanian" -- chelo.
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Joined: Apr 2007
Posts: 9,065 Likes: 31
Boards Chief Administrator Nobel Peace Prize Winner
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Boards Chief Administrator Nobel Peace Prize Winner
Joined: Apr 2007
Posts: 9,065 Likes: 31 |
MICHAEL: /terrified of having to read other people's short -- less than 100 part -- stories to tide him over between new parts/
There, there. ![[Linked Image]](http://cosgan.de/images/midi/froehlich/g040.gif) LOIS: /throws up her hands in disgust/ There goes MY investigation! Michael
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Originally posted by Darth Michael:
LOIS: /throws up her hands in disgust/ There goes MY investigation!
ER: And now all that putting out was for naught… LOIS: Putting out? I didn't put out... well, I didn't with Lex. CLARK: Then who did you put out with? LOIS: ![[Linked Image]](http://cosgan.de/images/smilie/frech/e015.gif) Oh, look at the time! DP-Headline: Superman bad in bed!
DP-Headline: Superman likes to dress in dresses! DP-HEADLINE: Superman reads minds!
VirginiaR.
"On the long road, take small steps." -- Jor-el, "The Foundling"
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"clearly there is a lack of understanding between those two... he speaks Lunkheadanian and she Stubbornanian" -- chelo.
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Joined: Apr 2007
Posts: 9,065 Likes: 31
Boards Chief Administrator Nobel Peace Prize Winner
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Boards Chief Administrator Nobel Peace Prize Winner
Joined: Apr 2007
Posts: 9,065 Likes: 31 |
LOIS: Putting out? I didn't put out... well, I didn't with Lex.
CLARK: Then who did you put out with? Michael
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Joined: Apr 2011
Posts: 9,509
Nobel Peace Prize Winner
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OP
Nobel Peace Prize Winner
Joined: Apr 2011
Posts: 9,509 |
Originally posted by Darth Michael:
DP-HEADLINE: Superman reads minds!
ER: /confused/ But that one’s true! CLARK: It is?  Then why can't I understand Lois?
VirginiaR.
"On the long road, take small steps." -- Jor-el, "The Foundling"
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"clearly there is a lack of understanding between those two... he speaks Lunkheadanian and she Stubbornanian" -- chelo.
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