Chapter 2
Double Jeopardy
Clark and his parents had spent another emotional few hours together. Sadly they all knew that there might be many such nights in the future, but they were determined to support each other through the hard times ahead. After their long discussion and more hugs, punctuated with a few tears, Clark had finally come to accept that this was the hand fate had dealt him and he would play it out. While he felt well, he'd work and be Superman. Of course, the day would come when that wouldn't be possible and he'd have to come up with a story to cover his alter ego's disappearance.
As the days eased by, his thoughts began to drift to Lois. He wanted so much to tell her what was going on. He could tell her about his illness, but he wanted her to know everything. At the same time he didn't want her to feel sorry for him. And, of course, there was Lois' infatuation with Superman to consider. If she knew her hero was sick, Clark would be subject to who knew what from her. She'd be constantly hovering over him in an effort to make sure he was taken care of. The trouble was that he was pretty sure that Lois' misery would mainly be for Superman's passing, with Clark just an afterthought, and he wasn't sure he could handle that.
And to make matters worse, she was seeing Lex Luthor. Of all the people in the world for Lois to date, this man wasn't exactly the perfect choice. It hadn't taken Clark long to discover that Luthor was pure evil. The billionaire might be known as one of the city's most generous philanthropists, yet Clark knew he was behind most of the criminal activity in Metropolis. But if he told Lois that, she would never believe him. On the few occasions he'd been brave enough to broach the subject, she'd defended Luthor, demanding proof of why Clark didn't like Lex, which he didn't have, of course. So there was just no other option; Superman would have to up his efforts to expose the man.
****
The newsroom of the Daily Planet buzzed with the usual workday activity, but Clark was having trouble concentrating this morning. He was exhausted, even after sleeping eight full hours the night before, something he did a lot of these days. It appeared that his illness had certainly caught up with him.
A phone rang shrilly on a nearby desk, causing him to wince. "Would somebody get that thing?" he called testily.
Lois sighed in exasperation as her eyes drifted around to her partner. What was with him these days?
With a huff, she pushed up from her desk and approached Clark. As much as she hated to, she had to ask for his opinion on their current story. They'd had a number of arguments lately and she didn't want to initiate another encounter.
"Clark?" she said as she reached him.
He was holding his head in his hands and didn't look up. "Yeah?" His lack of focus had spiralled into a nauseous headache.
"Could you take a look at this?" She thrust the research file under his nose, but when he didn't move or respond, Lois took it as a sign that he was being difficult. "You don't have to or anything," she snapped angrily.
"Lois, please."
The tone of his voice made her take a closer look at him. He was pale and he had another bruise on his hand, only this time it spread up his wrist and disappeared under his sleeve. She'd seen quite a few of those on Clark lately.
"Are you okay?" Her irritation had been replaced by worry. He might be impossible sometimes, but he was still her partner and friend. If he was ill, she wanted to help.
"No." He shot up from his seat and ran towards the men's room, no longer able to control his retching. Lois watched, then immediately wanted to know what was wrong, so she went after him.
Ernie from classified was leaving the restroom and cocked his head disapprovingly at Lois when she pushed past him.
"What's wrong? Haven't you ever seen a woman in the men's room?" she growled over her shoulder while hurrying to the stall from where she could hear the muffled sounds of Clark's distress. "Clark? Do you need some help?"
"I don't think I can get up," he managed to say in a weak voice after he'd finished heaving the contents of his stomach into the bowl.
Lois heard the latch clink on the stall door and pushed it open. Clark had flushed the toilet and was slumped against the wall shaking almost violently. She gasped. Her first instinct was to phone the paramedics, but she felt he wouldn't thank her for that. So instead, she ran to find Jimmy and a few moments later they had Clark settled on the sofa in Perry's office.
Very carefully, Lois sat down beside him and held a glass of water to his lips, helping him while he took a sip. "Clark, this isn't some virus. What's wrong?" she prodded gently. Lois wasn't often ill, but she was pretty sure that a flu virus didn't cause this kind of violent reaction.
Clark was finally beginning to gather himself back together. He eased into a sitting position and looked up at the faces surrounding him. Perry was hovering like a protective father, with Jimmy standing a little further back, craning over the Chief's shoulder. Lois was balanced on the edge of the couch and he could sense her anxiety, which only made him feel worse. In a moment he was about to upset her again and that was something he didn't want to do.
Clark took another drink of the water and a deep breath. "I, ah, I have… cancer… leukemia to be precise."
You could have heard a pin drop in the room. It didn't even sound like anyone was breathing. Clark didn't have the heart to look at the three stunned faces of his friends, who, he was pretty certain, were staring right back at him, thunderstruck. He had just caused them an enormous amount of pain and he couldn't force himself to look into their eyes and see that yet. Besides, if he kept his eyes closed his head hurt less.
For a few minutes the other two men were as still as statues as they struggled to digest Clark's news, while from close by he heard Lois give an almost inaudible gasp of shock. Perry recovered first, taking it upon himself to steady his staff, these three young people who had become an integral part of the Planet and his life.
"Aw, son, why didn't you tell us? No, scratch that -- it's not important." He sat on the other side of Clark. "Are you taking treatments?"
"Medication. It helps some days." Clark opened his eyes experimentally. Thank goodness the room had stopped swaying, but he still felt unable to face the others. Instead, he kept his eyes firmly fixed on the tile floor.
"Well, ah, what about chemo and radiation?" Perry asked in concern.
"We've done the radioactive iodine. It only had a minimal effect. Chemo hasn't been discussed yet. I guess that may be next."
"Damn!" The editor rose and paced across the room. This news had really hit him hard. Clark had come to the Planet full of enthusiasm and ready to make a difference to the world, and in the time he'd been here, the young man had come to mean so much to everyone, including Perry himself. Feeling that the room had suddenly started to close in on him, he spat, "I, ah... I need to go check on the copy." He strode out into the newsroom, afraid to reveal his softer side and fighting to control his emotions, which he knew Clark just couldn't take right now. Seconds later his gruff voice could be heard warning his troops that this wasn't the 'Waukeegan Gazette.'
In the office, Jimmy, finally took a breath. "Ah, man, CK, this blows!" Over the past months, Jimmy had come to regard Clark as the brother he'd never had. CK was never impatient or patronising, and he always made time to give advice or just listen to an up-and-coming kid reporter. Very few others around here did that and Jimmy was grateful. But now it looked like all that was about to change... well, Jimmy didn't want to think about that. CK would be fine. He had to be.
Clark couldn't help but chuckle. "Yeah, Jimmy, it blows."
"How can you two joke about this?" Lois asked angrily as she stared between Clark and Jimmy in astonishment. "This ... this is huge! This isn't a cold we're talking about here. Cancer, Clark!"
"If I don't joke, I may fall apart," Clark told her with a forced smile.
Lois softened at the look of hurt in his eyes, understanding that this was every bit as serious to her partner as it was to her... much more, probably. She reached out and rubbed his back, offering up as much comfort as she could. "Yeah, I suppose." Lois shrugged sheepishly. "Is there anything else I can do?"
"A couple of Advil might be good right now," Clark suggested, trying for a lighter note. God, it killed him to see the pain in Lois' eyes.
Lois smiled. "Sure, I can do that. Wait here, I'll be right back." She relinquished the glass of water to her partner and hurried away to procure the desired medication.
Left alone with Clark, Jimmy shuffled self-consciously, but he needed to let his friend know how much he cared. "Hey, CK, I don't know what I could do, but I'm here if you need anything."
"Thanks, Jimmy."
The young man nodded and patted Clark on the shoulder as he passed on his way back into the newsroom. His good friend had just told him a horrible thing and he needed somewhere quiet to think this through.
Out in the newsroom, Lois' hands fumbled to open the top drawer of her desk as she fought to control her emotions. She'd been completely dumbfounded when listening to Clark's explanation of his illness. So many times lately they'd had silly arguments and she'd felt like choking him. But not this! Her partner, her best friend had said he had cancer. She felt sick to her stomach as she tried desperately to process this information.
She glanced over at the man sitting in Perry's office. She and Clark had come a long way in their relationship since they'd met. Would it all end soon? Would she ever know...?
With a deep breath for courage, she headed back to deliver the aspirin.
Clark was staring down at his hands, feeling a little steadier than he'd been when she'd left him. He looked up when Lois touched his shoulder. Without a word, he swallowed down the pills she offered with another gulp of water. "Thanks, Lois. I guess I should try to get back to work now."
"In a bit -- give the painkillers a chance to work." Lois took the glass and walked over to Perry's desk, placing it on the surface. At last they were on their own, so it was time to get some answers. Slowly she turned to face him, propping her behind against the editor's treasured piece of furniture. "Clark, why didn't you tell me?"
"When, Lois? If I recall, you've been pretty angry with me lately."
Lois hung her head because he was right. She'd been angry and short with him for the last few days after they'd had a quarrel about her dating Lex Luthor. For some unknown reason, Clark didn't approve and she had a suspicion that he was jealous, but that fact seemed insignificant now. "I know." She looked back up at him. "I guess I let my stubborn pride get the better of me."
"Yeah." Clark smiled at her. "Look, I'm sorry I didn't tell you. But I don't want you moping around feeling sorry for me. This is something that I have to accept."
"Have to accept? Are you crazy? Clark, you never stop fighting. Never!"
"Lois, I don't want to spend the rest of the time I have left sick. I'm already like that enough. I just want to do what I can while I can. Please understand!"
Lois was staring at him. He said 'the time he had left'. It was starting to hit her that this was more serious than she thought. "How long? How long do you have left?"
"A few years, maybe more I hope."
"A few years? Five, ten? How many?" she asked, fear sharpening her voice, as she swiped a hand across her cheek to clear away a persistent tear.
"Five maybe, without a cure."
Clark's pained expression brought the truth of that short statement home -- this was very, very real. "Oh God!" Her hand came up to cover her mouth while more tears stung her eyelids. Lois stood and strode over to the window, gazing out into the bright sunny day.
How could the sun still be shining?
"Come on, Lois. Don't do this."
"Don't do this?" she said as she whirled to face him, unable to stop another tear from making a track down her cheek. "Clark, you're my friend, a good friend. Maybe even my best friend. How can you ask me not to be upset?"
Clark could only stare for a moment, his thoughts hanging on what she'd said. She probably didn't even realize she'd just admitted he might be her best friend, but he hadn't missed a word. And he hadn't missed the tears that she'd quickly scrubbed off her face. His heart clenched tightly for her. He'd never been able to stand causing Lois any kind of pain, but after spending so many days longing for time with this woman, her reaction felt wonderful. It meant she cared, really cared. Finally he managed to speak again. "I know you're upset, but if you think about the bad, the good won't seem important."
"The good? What good?"
"What good? Lois, I'm not dead yet. Most of the time I'm healthy. There's no reason to concentrate on an end that hasn't gotten here."
Lois could tell Clark had spent a lot of hours thinking about that end. He'd already come to terms with his fate and was trying to move forward. If he could manage to be a little positive, then so could she. Lois walked back over to where he sat and eased down beside him.
"Why don't we take the afternoon off and go to the beach?"
"I'd love to, but we need to finish this story." Clark reached for her hand when he saw her hurt expression. "I know this is hard to grasp and sometimes it doesn't seem real to me either. But Lois, I can't just stop living. I have to get up every day the way I've always done. I have to keep working. If I don't, I'll lose my mind."
She considered his statement for a while before she spoke. Maybe he was right. Maybe keeping a sense of normality would be best, and she could definitely help with that. "Okay. Think you can look at that file now?" A slight teasing grin danced on her lips and thankfully it had the desired effect because Clark smiled back at her.
"Sure." He managed to get to his feet with a little effort and together they left the office to finish their day.
****
Things started to change for Clark after that day. Evidently word got around the newsroom and everyone started to treat Clark with kid gloves. Lois was nice and Jimmy went out of his way to do things for him. Perry wouldn't even yell at him and it was killing Clark more quickly than the cancer was. This kind of treatment was exactly why he hadn't wanted anyone to know.
Clark stepped off the elevator into the busy newsroom, ready to face yet another harrowing day of his friends tiptoeing around him. Most mornings he found it difficult to get himself in gear, but he wasn't running too late today, so perhaps he hadn't been missed. Even if he had, no one would mention it. Jimmy wouldn't throw a joke at him, Perry wouldn't quip sarcastically and, most of all, Lois wouldn't complain loudly about his tardiness. And he hated it.
Looking over the bullpen, he spotted all the people he'd just been thinking about in the conference room, probably getting ready for the daily staff meeting. Maybe now was a good time to see if he could get things straight. He marched purposefully down the ramp, crossed to the room, and, as the glass doors closed behind him with a determined click, everyone turned towards him.
"Look, if I don't say something I'll explode," he started anxiously. As much as he hated to distress them, he hated it more to have them treat him as if he was.. well, sick. "Everyone has got to stop treating me like I'm dying."
Perry's brows rose as he looked at Clark. "But, ah, isn't that… isn't that what's happening?" He hadn't meant to be so direct, but how else could he phrase it?
"Yes, Perry. I might die from this, but you guys are gonna kill me a whole lot sooner. We're all mortal! As long as I'm alive, I want to live all I can, and I can't stand another day of this special treatment."
"Excuse us for caring," Lois snorted at him.
"I love it that you care. I just don't love it that you remind me of my imminent death every day. When you don't yell at me, Perry, I feel left out," he said with soulful, sad eyes directed at his boss. "Jimmy, you fall over yourself to do things for me as if I were already incapable, and I can't even begin to tell you, Lois, how bad it makes me feel to know you're nice to me just because I'm sick. I don't think I'll be able to keep this up." He held his partner's gaze for a few seconds. "Come on, guys, can't you all put the idea that I'm sick behind you for a bit? In a few short years, my time will end all too soon, but I'd like my life to be as normal as possible until whatever end comes. If you keep reminding me of that approaching day, I won't be able to think of anything but that."
Clark took a breath and ran a hand through his hair. "It's nice to know I have such good friends. It may make the end a little easier. I just want the middle to be as memorable. Okay?" His eyes pleaded with them to understand. He loved them all dearly for their concern, yet that concern was smothering him.
Perry got up from his chair at the head of the long table and came around to put a hand on Clark's shoulder. "I get ya, son! My father said much the same thing before his death. He had an irreversible heart condition, you know. That first week after the diagnosis, we cossetted him until he bawled us out. But that second week was some of the best days of his life. Of course, we didn't realise it would be that quick Neither did he, I think, because he almost forgot he was leaving us. One afternoon, he said good-bye to go to town just like normal, but he had a massive coronary before he even got to the car. He died the way he wanted to. Now if that's the way you want to live, that's the way it'll be. But son, I think everyone in this room will agree when I say that we're not letting you go without a fight. Ya' hear?!"
Clark grinned widely at his boss. "I hear, Chief."
"Good!" Perry patted Clark's shoulder for a couple of seconds before stepping around him and opening the door. "So what are you still doing standing here? We have a staff meeting in ten minutes and you have a story to finish before then, so get to it!" he ordered in his best 'Editor in Chief' mode, and the door slammed behind him on his exit. Obviously, Perry had decided that normal service should be resumed right away.
Smiling in relief, Clark watched him go then turned back to the others. "Come on, guys, take your cue from the Chief. Don't waste what time I do have left by killing me with kindness. After all, who knows how long any of us have?"
"You're right," Jimmy said as he stood. "Lois is living proof of that." The two men burst into laughter, while Lois stuck her tongue out at Jimmy. "Ooo, promises, promises!"
"Jimmy!" Lois yelled with a surprised look.
The young gofer guffawed a little anxiously at Lois' shocked face. After all, this was Mad Dog Lane he'd just teased suggestively, but she appeared to be taking it in the spirit it was intended. He thanked his lucky stars and turned back to Clark, slapping him playfully on the back. "From now on, CK, you get your own damn research, okay? I have to set up the meeting... and I was getting a little tired of hauling an old man around anyway," he kidded.
"Okay." For the first time in days, Clark grinned wholeheartedly as Jimmy walked away, still giggling at his own jokes. But when the door closed, Clark dropped into the chair next to Lois. "How about you, Lois? Will you just remember I'm Clark and forget that I'm sick?"
"Clark, I don't know that I can," she replied gently, twisting in her seat to face him and revealing her gaze, which was stark with pain. It was still too hard to accept that her friend might leave her.
Clark sighed. How could he deter her? "Would you at least try?"
Lois looked across at him steadily. "This is what you really want?"
"Yes. Lois, I know I've never been your favorite person."
"That's not exactly true," she was quick to correct him. "I just felt I was too good to be paired with a hack." She grinned to let him know she was only kidding, though, if she were being honest, at the time she really had been upset to be partnered with someone who in her opinion had little experience. It was amazing how wrong she'd been.
Clark chuckled ruefully. "Yeah. I remember you calling me that a time or two."
"I'm sorry. You proved pretty quickly that you were more than capable of keeping up with me professionally."
Clark's brows rose slightly. "Wow. I guess that's a compliment."
Lois smiled and ducked her head. "Yeah, well, enjoy it. You know I don't give them often."
"That's for sure." He laughed a little harder as she swatted his arm. "See, this is more like the way I'd pictured us remaining."
Lois sobered with his comment. "Clark."
"No, Lois. This is what I want. Don't make me feel sick. I do that enough by myself."
After a moment or two, Lois reached for his hand. "Okay. I can't promise I won't forget, but I can tell you I'll try to be the same old obnoxious person you've come to know."
Clark let his head drop back and laughed out loud. "Good enough. Come on. Let's go nail a bad guy."
"You got it, partner."
That was the best thing Clark had heard in days. If he hadn't said something about the way everyone was treating him, he was sure he'd have gotten sicker long before his time, and since throwing his guts up wasn't anything he enjoyed, he'd had to tell them how he felt. Thank goodness it looked as if he'd made the right decision.
****
Following the talk with his friends, Clark's life settled back to something akin to normality, at least, enough to satisfy him. Perry barked his orders once more; Jimmy was -- well, Jimmy, and even Lois seemed to have gotten back her competitive edge. Clark, himself, was healthy and chose to keep up with all his usual activities, including the super stuff. On a particular afternoon, those activities had him making another of his lame excuses in the newsroom and speeding to a 'red alert' fire on the South Side.
Superman had successfully carried ten people from the destroyed ruins of their apartment building and gone back to douse the flames with a little super breath, while beneath him the fire services worked diligently to protect the surrounding blocks from the greedy blaze. When it was clear the fire was at last under control, he took the time to stop and talk to the fire chief, who he'd met a couple of times on previous rescues. Superman considered the man an expert in his field and had come to regard him as something of a colleague, if not exactly a friend. The two were deep in conversation when a very familiar voice interrupted their talk.
"Superman!"
Clark glanced over his shoulder to see Lois in hot pursuit of the latest super feat and he gave an apologetic shrug to the fireman.
"Go ahead, Superman," the older man grinned, his teeth showing white against his ash-smeared skin. "You've done all you can, but my men can take it from here. Thanks again for your help." With those words the fire chief shook the hero's hand and waved him off towards the pretty young woman who was hovering at the edge of the safety barrier.
Pasting his best superficial smile on his face, Clark turned and started towards his partner.
"Hi, Lois."
"Hi." She slipped beneath the barricade and reached his side, with her notepad ready to go. "What happened?"
Superman took a few moments to tell her about the fire and the people he'd rescued. As was always the case with Lois, she asked all the appropriate questions and quickly jotted down his replies. In fact, she was deep into her interview when she was suddenly distracted from her writing. Looking up, she noticed Superman seemed to be swaying a little on his feet.
"Superman?" Lois reached out to help him get his balance.
The superhero shook his head, trying to rid it of the wave of dizziness that had swept over him. This was exactly what his mom had feared when she'd warned him to take it easy. Martha was continually worried that he'd overtax his strength, but he'd decided he had to be here -- people would have died otherwise. Now he was paying the price for his stubborn determination. He grasped Lois' arm, thankful she was there for once.
"Just give me a sec." He bent to catch his breath. This was the last thing he needed to happen because Lois was far too perceptive, and she was fairly sceptical of coincidences. If she took the time to look closely, she could easily put things together and figure out his secret. Then again, he might actually need her help later on. Was that something he could live with? Was it something he wanted? Right now he didn't have the stamina to answer these questions. He just needed to get his breath and get away so he could think.
Meanwhile, Lois' mind was reeling. Superman appeared to be sick, but that was impossible. Superman was invulnerable--he didn't get sick. She watched as he brought his other hand to his face to rub his eyes vigorously and her mouth fell open slightly as she spotted an ugly purple bruise on the back of his hand.
That was crazy. Superman didn't bruise.
For some moments both remained still; Lois was lost in her thoughts while Superman struggled to regain his balance.
Finally, Superman straightened and released his hold on her arm. "Thank you, Lois. I guess I overdid it."
"I thought you… were… well…."
"Invincible? I do burn out after a while. I have to rest just like anyone else," he explained with a tiny touch of annoyance. The last thing he needed right now was for Lois to know just how horrible he felt.
"Oh yeah. Of course you do," she stammered uncertainly, still trying to grasp the fact that the Man of Steel was unwell.
He was about to offer his apologies and leave when he noticed she was looking at him strangely. "Lois, is something wrong?"
"Well… I didn't think you got hurt." She stared at him intently, her eyes darting between his face and the ugly bruise on his hand. This wasn't just burn out!
"What?"
"There," she pointed to his hand. "You have a nasty bruise."
Clark's heart raced as he looked down at the ugly purple mark. He must have gotten this one recently because he could have sworn he'd covered all the others. He had to think of an explanation fast. "Ah, I guess I…." His head snapped to the side as another call rang out. There were times when his super hearing came in very handy. "I'm really sorry, Lois, but someone's calling." With that said, he disappeared in a flash, feeling very relieved to escape Lois' searching questions.
Lois was left to ponder this new bit of information. Was it possible the Man of Steel did get hurt after all? But what about all those things she'd seen him do in the past? He caught bullets on a regular basis. For goodness sake, he'd swallowed a bomb without any visible signs of injury! Her reporter's instincts told her there was more going on here than met the eye. Judging by the way he looked when she'd pointed out his bruise, followed by his abrupt exit, there was a lot more going on, and she was determined to find out what it was. Not only for a story either -- Lois cared about her superhero. She hurried back through the crowd of gawkers and whistled for a cab.
****
Lois made it back to the newsroom and wrote up the story on the fire. However, she'd decided that, for the present, she wouldn't reveal her suspicions about the state of Superman's health. They were really just unsubstantiated facts anyway, and she wasn't quite sure where to start trying to find out what was going on with Superman. Maybe she should talk to Clark. He and Superman seemed to be close.
Speaking of her partner, she wondered if he'd returned from his mysterious errand. He wasn't at his desk so she scanned the bullpit and spotted him coming from the men's room. He was a little pale, she thought. Of course, he'd been that way a lot lately, so that wasn't a huge surprise. Lois stood up from her desk and reached Clark's just as he sat down. She sincerely hoped he wasn't getting sicker already, but she hid her concern, knowing he didn't like anyone to create a fuss.
"Hi, Lois. What's up?" He managed a cheerful tone even though he looked dreadful.
"Nothing. You feel okay?" she asked, trying to act casually, but unable to quite bring herself to be completely unaware of his condition.
"I'm a little tired, but I'll live."
"Bad joke," she reminded him with a wry lift of her shapely eyebrows.
He smiled sadly. "Yeah, I guess it was." He sifted through a couple of files, hoping he could distract his partner from probing his state of health. "Did you get the story on the fire done?"
Lois didn't answer. She was staring at the hand that had just moved across the desk to open a folder. It looked a lot like another hand she'd seen earlier in the day.
Clark looked up at her. "Lois? You okay?"
Her eyes shot to his. Could it be possible? Nah, that was crazy! She couldn't be thinking what she was. Clark couldn't be Superman. Clark was sick. He was dying of cancer and he was her partner. She'd worked beside him for nearly a year. She would have known if he were Superman. Wouldn't she? Yet she couldn't deny that Clark was sporting a very similar bruise to the one she'd seen on Superman. Was that just a coincidence? Suddenly she wasn't so sure.
"Lois?" Clark prompted again, almost afraid to think of what was going on behind her blank stare.
But Lois was oblivious to his anxious questions. Her mind was already frantically processing everything she knew about the two men. They'd showed up in Metropolis about the same time. Clark had arrived first, with Superman putting in that very public appearance a few days later. Of course, as far as she knew, Superman hadn't been seen anywhere before that time, while Clark Kent had led a fairly normal life in Kansas, before going on his world travels. Maybe she should do a bit of research into that part of Kent's life, see if there had been anything strange going on.
Then there was the fact that she'd never seen the two men together -- Clark always disappeared with some crazy excuse before Superman showed up. They did look a little alike -- same dark hair and skin tone, and they both had an overwhelming desire to help. Both were the most moral men she'd ever met. But did that all add up to mean that Clark was Superman? She needed time to think. She needed to get away.
"I, ah, I just remembered I have… something to do," Lois stuttered, giving a very good impersonation of the evasive excuses Clark normally produced prior to his speedy exits.
Before Clark could say a word, she turned and nearly ran to the elevator. Why was Lois leaving in the middle of a work day? Had he done something to upset her?
****
Lois left the Planet to clear her head. She paced around the streets of Metropolis, wandering aimlessly, unaware of people or places around her. Her partner could not possibly be the Man of Steel. It just wasn't so. But, as the facts chased through her mind yet again, even she had to admit it was conceivable. All the disappearing acts, the excuses, and she'd never seen the two men in the same room together. Not to mention the number of times she'd tried to call Clark when Superman was halfway round the world dealing with an emergency, and all she could get was his answering machine. No wonder, even Superman couldn't be in two places at once! It made perfect sense -- the perfect cover!. Who would ever think to question that a mild-mannered reporter would be Superman?
But Lois was a reporter and it was her job to see beyond the exterior! What was it that Perry always said? 'If something walks like a duck, talks like a duck... then it is a damn duck!' It has to be....
Only Clark Kent wasn't a duck. He was a... rat! Why the hell hadn't he told her he was really Superman?
Lois felt like an idiot. Superman and Clark were one in the same. Suddenly she wondered why she hadn't seen it before now. It was so obvious. Of course, it was! That's why the disguise worked so well.
For a long moment, Lois thought about that and gradually she realised Clark wasn't the disguise. He was too real, too substantial. He had a life. He had a family. Superman was the disguise to hide the man while he helped people.
And all this time, she'd been completely in the dark! Slowly she let her anger rise to the surface. Clark, her friend, her partner, had lied to her. He'd let her believe he was two different people and she'd made a fool out of herself in the process.
Lois glared down the sidewalk she'd been walking on. That's it! There would be no more of this endless meandering. She was going to go over to Kent's place and give him a piece of her mind. In fact, she just might kill him before the leukemia got to him! Doing an about turn that would have satisfied the most meticulous drill-sergeant, she marched back toward her Jeep.
"Just wait till I get done with you. Man of Steel my foot. You'll wish you were."
She dove into the car, put it in gear and bulldosed her way into the traffic.
****
Clark shut down his computer after six to head home. He hadn't felt the best since returning from his stint as Superman, but being the only remaining member of the Lane/Kent partnership actually at work, Clark hadn't wanted to leave Perry in the lurch.
Surprisingly, Lois hadn't returned for the rest of the day, which meant she was probably more upset than he'd originally thought. Maybe he'd call her later to see if he could help in any way. A quick rescue, a minor car accident on the freeway, detoured him on his journey home, holding him back from taking the shower he hoped would make him feel better.
Eventually, though, the hot water had soothed away his aches and pains, yet it had done little to dispel his tiredness. He'd just stepped out of the shower and had pulled on a pair of jeans when Lois stormed into his room. He stopped drying his hair and looked up at her.
"How can you be sick? I thought you were invulnerable."
"I thought so, too." He froze when he realized what she'd said and how he'd answered her. "What did you say?"
"I said, I thought you were invulnerable." She placed her hands on her hips in what Clark had come to call her 'full battle mode' and glared at him, daring him to call her on this one.
"That's what I thought you said."
"And by the way you answered, I'm right." Her arms moved to cross over her chest in a gesture similar to Superman's, warning him not to deny it.
Clark sighed wearily and dropped his towel over the rail of the spiral staircase. "Yes, Lois, you're right." He didn't have the energy to come up with a plausible explanation. Besides, he wasn't sure he wanted to hide from Lois any longer.
"But you're sick."
"I know." Clark offered her an exhausted, yet gentle smile. "Come on. I need to eat while we talk. Maybe I can explain a few things."
"Oh you better believe you're going to explain a few things," she mumbled sarcastically as she turned and started towards the kitchen
Clark sighed again and followed her. This wasn't exactly what he had in mind when he'd envisioned telling her, but he was almost relieved she knew the truth. With his progressing illness, who knew when Superman might need her help in the future?
Almost on auto-pilot, Clark pulled some ready-made sandwiches and a carton of milk from the fridge and placed them on the table, while Lois fetched a couple of glasses from the cabinet. In the dimmed light, they sat on opposite sides of the table, and for a few minutes they concentrated absentmindedly on the food. Then very apprehensively Clark began to talk, his words falling softly into the quiet room.
It took him a full hour to tell Lois everything about himself and what he knew of his illness. Yet, when he reached the end of his revelation, she stayed silent for over ten minutes, obviously deep in thought, while Clark fretted with worry. Just how mad was Lois going to be?
"Dr. Klein hasn't found out anything else?" she finally asked, raising her eyes to meet his. Her anger had given way to the same helpless emotions she'd experienced when Clark had first told her he was ill. As furious as she'd been by his deception, she couldn't ignore the fact that this man was still her friend and he was still dying. And more than that... she now knew that she was in danger of losing Superman -- the whole world would too. Somehow, for the moment, anger seemed a very trivial emotion.
Clark stared at her a moment, trying to read her expression in the semi-darkness of his apartment. He thought she'd have been more curious and angry about him keeping such a huge secret from her. "Not yet. I haven't spoken to him in over three weeks but if he knew anything, he'd call. Lois, are you okay?" he asked uncertainly. "Because you're taking this a whole lot better than I thought."
Lois pushed up from the table and started to pace. She could think more clearly on her feet, and right now, she needed to be as clear-headed as possible. "Clark, you're right. I am mad because you didn't tell me about this and you'll probably hear more about that later, but for now I need to grasp everything that's going on."
"Fair enough." Actually, Clark was very happy at Lois' more subdued reaction. He wasn't up to dealing with an irate partner right now.
"Okay!" Marching into the living room, Lois grabbed her bag and jacket. "Meet me at Star Labs in the morning and we'll see if Dr Klein has anything new." She ran lightly up the stairs but paused on the landing. "Oh, and Clark, try to get some sleep, 'cause I have to tell you, you look awful."
Then she was gone and he was left smiling as the door closed behind the tornado that was Lois Lane.
