A story based on events from House of Luthor. Post-BatP...
HAVE A LITTLE FAITH IN ME
Part 1
~~~~~~~
*** “And I do love you…. as a friend.”
“…if you were just an ordinary man leading an ordinary life, I would love you just the same…” ***
Her voice echoed in his mind. Haunting him. It had been one day since she had turned him down, and he had turned her down, and in turn, she had accepted Lex Luthor’s proposal. Clark paced his ceiling. He hadn’t slept and was desperately trying to find a way out of this mess. How had things spun so far out of control? One minute his life was exactly as it should be. Exactly as he liked it. Now, The Daily Planet was destroyed, he was no longer partners with Lois, Lois had taken away the hope that maybe someday she would love him, or had some feelings of love toward him now, and she was about to marry Lex Luthor, his enemy.
Clark slowly floated until he was upright on the floor again. He put a hand through his hair and sighed softly. It was killing him that he was the strongest man in the world and couldn’t do one thing to save this situation.
“Well, I could have offered myself to her, as Superman. Then she wouldn’t be marrying Luthor,” he thought. But he shook his head. He knew he couldn’t live a life with her not being himself. Not being Clark Kent, the man he was deep down and above all else.
He knew he was in a mess that he couldn’t do anything about. And it was tearing him up.
****************
****************
Lois lay in her bed, staring at the ceiling. She hadn’t slept—her mind was reeling. At first, she kept thinking about her conversation with Superman and getting upset. At his words, at his accusation that he couldn’t believe her declaration of love ‘under the circumstances’, and at the idea that it might be true what he said—that they could never have a future together.
But as the night slowly became day, she found herself thinking more about Clark. She realized she was more upset with the way things with Clark were than she was about Superman. She was filled with regret, for one thing. She wished that she hadn’t asked to see Superman after he had said he loved her. She suddenly realized how insensitive that was. She told him that she couldn’t love him, and needed to talk to Superman, obviously to tell him she loves him.
“Talk about waving something in someone’s face!” she said out loud, disgusted at herself for being so uncaring toward Clark’s feelings. He had poured his heart out to her and said something that was incredibly personal and probably hard to say and she had practically waved him away, asking to see someone else.
She thought back through their partnership and friendship and realized that it was very obvious that he loved her strongly. Probably stronger than anyone would ever love her. He always put her first. Her feelings mattered the most to him. More than his own…
He always did things for her, like bring her coffee, exactly the way she liked it. Better than the way she liked it. She wasn’t sure she had ever even told him how she liked it. But somewhere along the lines, he just learned. He’d paid attention. Not just to the way she took her coffee, but a lot of small things that didn’t even matter. Except, it mattered when he did them. It was all the little things he selflessly did that added up, making her truly appreciate the man who worked beside her and respected and cared for her, worming his way into her life with his gentility, humor and friendliness… becoming her best friend.
She found herself thinking back to when she worked at the Planet before Clark. She didn’t even seem like the same person. Everyone had ulterior motives; there were no good people in the world. She actually considered Claude to be the most thoughtful person in her life at one point. He had brought her coffee this one time, she remembered, and it was okay. Not quite the way she liked it, but okay nonetheless. She appreciated the gesture, which he made sure she knew he did; he didn’t want the action to go unnoticed; unappreciated.
*** “Cherie, I made you a café! I do zees things because I care!”***
Clark never mentioned the small things he did, and somehow, maybe even as a result of that, the message was much clearer that he cared. He would bring her coffee while talking about their assignment, and never ask how it was, or if it was just right, or anything at all. He was confident he had done it right, and didn’t want praise or recognition or anything in return. That was just how he was. He made it so casual and friendly, these small things, that she was always aware that he had no ulterior motives.
Thinking back on it now, Claude was ridiculous and now one of her biggest regrets. But she didn’t know that anyone better really existed. She thought he really did care. And when he hurt her, she decided to not hope for better, not to look for it, and just be on her own. No one could affect her…
And then Clark came into her life. Stumbled into it, really. She smiled now, remembering how upset she was at Perry for pairing them up. Now she felt like calling him to thank him for the best thing that ever happened to her.
She froze suddenly at that thought… how could Clark be the best thing that ever happened to her? He was her friend, granted her best friend, but her friend all the same. And people usually referred to the person they were in love with as the best thing that ever happened to them. Surely, she mused, Superman would be the best thing that ever happened to her. But… she shook her head… he wasn’t. She felt strongly about him and even said she loved him and meant it. But he was around about one twentieth of the amount of time Clark was around… or even less than that! She could live without Superman. Not that she would ever want him to leave, she reminded herself, thinking back to that awful heat wave that almost drove him away from Metropolis and from her. She wouldn’t want him to leave, but she could live without him all the same. She didn’t need him. He wasn’t something she was used to… he wasn’t around enough to be that. Clark, on the other hand… She remembered that same heat wave had almost driven him out of town, and suddenly her sadness over Superman leaving had taken the back seat. Clark was leaving! And she had only just welcomed him into her life, as a friend and a partner. But he hadn’t left in the end, she thought thankfully. Neither of them had! But now… Clark was gone anyway. She was driving him away by hurting him relentlessly, as if it were her intention. She was slowly driving away, she realized, the best thing that ever happened to her. Because she knew without a shadow of a doubt, that that is what Clark had slowly become to her.
She kept thinking about how things would change, now that she knew how he felt, and now that she was getting married to someone she knew Clark didn’t like. Hated, rather. She realized that the idea of things changing between her and Clark terrified her. She had a feeling the change couldn’t be good. Not with her impending marriage to Lex. It simply scared her to the core of her being that there may be a distance between her and Clark that had never been there before.
After dialing and hanging up repeatedly, debating whether or not to call him, she finally decided that she needed to.
“Hello?” his voice said after the first ring. That familiar, friendly voice.
For all the time she had put into thinking about calling him, she couldn’t think of a thing to say when he answered. She wracked her brain for something to say that might break the ice, or cause him to laugh—how she wanted to hear that familiar laugh—but nothing came.
“Hello?” his voice came again.
She could tell he was about to hang up. “Clark?”
“Lois,” he said, softly. After she failed to say anything more, he continued. “Uh, how are you?”
“Oh, you know. Just busy busy busy. Lots going on,” she said nervously.
“Yeah, I’ll bet,” he replied in a friendly tone.
“How are you?” she asked, trying to sound casual, but failing miserably. She was desperate to know that he was okay. That she hadn’t completely devastated him, as she feared she did.
“I’m fine,” he said.
***************
Clark was confused as to what Lois could possibly want. The previous day she had completely refused him. Turned him down blatantly, asking for Superman afterward. Surely she would realize that calling would be incredibly awkward for both of them. The hurt he had been feeling quickly turned to annoyance. He felt he didn’t deserve this. Yesterday he wore his heart on his sleeve and bared his soul to her. She humiliated him, making him feel like a sixth grader with a crush on a teacher. She even rubbed it in who she WAS in love with. And it wasn’t him, but someone she repeatedly reminded him he could never measure up to. Now she wanted to chat?
“Look, Lois,” he started, trying to be cordial, despite his feelings, “I really have a lot of things going on right now.”
“Oh! Of course, sure,” she said, and it broke his heart that he may be hurting her feelings by brushing her aside like this. He knew that he even had a right to hurt her feelings. But he didn’t want to.
He sighed. “Well, good luck with the wedding plans,” he said. “I’ll talk to you—“
“No, wait!” she said, urgently.
He could hear tears in her voice. He didn’t want to feel bad for her. She had hurt him! But it was Lois. And he had been in love with Lois Lane from the second he met her. “Yes, Lois?”
“Clark, I want to talk to you!”
“Okay,” he said gently. “Talk,” he encouraged.
“No, Clark, in person. I need to talk to you in person.”
He wanted to say no. But she sounded so desperate and sad. And staying her friend might be the only way to try to stop her from marrying that monster, he reasoned to himself.
“Okay,” he finally muttered.
“Oh! Great! Thank you, Clark,” she said excitedly, and he could tell she was trying to keep her emotions intact. “Okay, how about we meet in Centennial Park at noon?”
“Okay, I’ll see you there,” he said.
After hanging up the phone, Clark sighed and looked up. He knew this was going to be a long day.
***************
***************
Lois glanced nervously at her surroundings. She stood at Centennial Park, which was peaceful as ever on this beautiful May day, and she could not stop fidgeting. She could not figure out why she was so nervous to see Clark. “After all,” she told herself, “he did agree to see me in person; that has to count for something.” She stood out from the tranquil setting, in her dark business suit and nervous manner. Behind her, the fountain bubbled peacefully and constantly, while a quiet buzz of friendly, happy people filled the area. She realized upon arrival that taking him to the scene of the crime, so to say, was probably not the best idea, but she had not thought of that when she talked to him. She was just too excited that he agreed to see her at all, that she just spit out the first place she could think of. She rolled her eyes now, realizing she couldn’t get much more insensitive than this. The day was beautiful, but she felt a slight shiver as she looked over at the bench… THE bench, where they were when he bared his soul to her.
His eyes…
That look…
She was just starting to convince herself to relax when she noticed Clark rounding the corner, entering the park. Her stomach filled with butterflies and her breath caught in her throat. She couldn’t help noticing that he looked wonderful, wearing a black t-shirt and running pants. “Where did THAT thought come from?” she wondered to herself. She shrugged the thought off, thinking it left over guilt from having dismissed his feelings so carelessly only just a day before. She braced herself as he got closer to where she stood. She had no idea what she was going to say to try to smooth things over, but she knew something had to be said. She hoped when the time was right, she’d just know what to say.
***************
Clark kept himself completely calm as he approached Lois. He had worked hard to downplay his appearance, so as to not look like he was trying to impress her, or make her love him—or love how he looked, or something pathetic like that. He didn’t want to look like he was still hoping she might be attracted to him, and might care for him as more than a friend. Because he didn’t. Hope, that is. At least he told himself that he didn’t. So he opted for a simple pair of running slacks and a black tee shirt. He knew that despite the cool exterior he was putting on, he was nervous to see Lois. He knew that Lois didn’t know he was Superman, but he still felt awkward after their last encounter. He had been upset, turned off, hurt and a million other prideful things, and he took it out on her. He realized he was actually glad she wanted to see him, because he wanted to make sure she was okay. As he got closer, and he saw how beautiful she looked, dressed in a nice, form-fitting black suit, he realized that his attempts at looking cool, collected and indifferent in his own appearance were all for naught. He felt he was not doing a good job of hiding his love and attraction. And there he was. As he got closer, the conflicts inside him intensified. He wanted to make sure she was okay. He didn’t want to lose control of himself again like he had the night before, hurting her in the process, forcing her into the arms of his enemy as a result. But as he got closer, all the hurt returned to him in full, and he realized that no matter how hard he might want to control his feelings, control had flown the coup practically the second she came into view.
“Hi, Lois,” he said, walking up to her. “That sounded casual,” he thought to himself.
He looked at her and realized that he couldn’t read her. She looked like she wanted to cry, but was also extremely happy to see him.
“Hi,” she finally managed, quietly.
They stared at each other for a moment, awkwardly.
“Look, Lois—“
“Clark!”
They started simultaneously, and then stopped, smiling at one another. They always seemed to want to talk to each other at the same time.
“Okay, you go first,” Clark allowed.
Lois gave Clark a sincere half-smile and put a stray strand of hair behind her ear.
“Clark, this has been a completely miserable day. I feel like I’ve lost everything. My job, my partner, my best friend, the man I love—“ she stopped herself and looked up at his intense gaze just in time to see the hurt flicker across his expression.
“I know, Lois,” he finally said. “But you haven’t lost your friend,” he said, thinking he sounded sincere enough. He knew he had to stick to the mission at hand; getting her away from Luthor, which he couldn’t do from the distance of a stranger. “I’ll always be….” he stopped, searching for the right word to end his thought with. “Here,” he finally said, and her expression softened and her smile became appreciative.
“Thank you, Clark. I just needed to hear that. Gosh, after yesterday, I didn’t think you’d ever want to talk to me again! I mean, after you said you loved me, and then I said I couldn’t love you back that way, and then I said to send Superman, and then as you can obviously tell, that didn’t go according to plan, and I accepted Lex’s proposal, as you also obviously know, and wow, I’m rambling, I just said more than I ever meant to,” she finished, sounding unsure of herself. She was trying to capture Clark’s gaze, but couldn’t as his eyes were looking down… distant.
She had just recapped in such simple terms everything that hurt that she’d done... that she’d said. Everything that was killing him inside. He knew he couldn’t pity himself though. Not now. There could be time for that later. When she wasn’t engaged to a madman. He swallowed and opened his mouth ready to say something to her, when he heard an alarm and people screaming in the distance.
“Uh, I’m sorry, Lois, I have to—“ he started, already running out of the park as he mumbled incoherently a lame excuse, even to him. And then he was gone.
He was in the air over Metropolis, looking down at Lois, alone in the park, just in time to hear her say, “I thought you said you’d always be here,” in a quiet, sad voice. With a sonic boom, he was off, toward the sound of a raging alarm.
***************
***************
Lois threw open the door to her apartment, in complete frustration. The short-lived confrontation with Clark had not gone at all according to plan. Of course, she reminded herself, there was no plan. But him running off before they got remotely anywhere was definitely NOT what she had hoped for. In one second she was slamming the door to her apartment closed and in the next, opening the freezer door, grabbing a pint of chocolate ice cream from its frozen, protective home. Before the freezer door even shut, she had grabbed a spoon, dug in, and was heading to the couch in the living room. She threw herself onto her couch and started playing with the spoon that was hanging out of her mouth. She replayed the short conversation in her head, again, and tried to make sense of what had happened. She pulled the spoon out of her mouth, relishing in the taste of chocolate her depression often rewarded her with.
“Let’s see,” she said to herself, waving the spoon around, analyzing the situation. “I mentioned not loving him, loving Superman and accepting Lex’s proposal…all in one breath!”
She let out a sigh and drove her spoon back in angrily. “Gee Lois, what could have propelled him off? Big mystery!”
****************
****************
Clark opened the door to his apartment, and staggered in. His head was still hurting. It had luckily only been a false alarm and everyone was okay. But he felt uneasy on his feet when he was talking to the security guard about it. He felt dizzy and wobbly, but not nearly to the extent he had in Smallville. It wasn’t the same at all. And there was not anyone suspicious that he could see there. Everyone was just walking around. No criminals. False alarm.
False alarm.
And when he wanted to leave, he flew away. Normal. Powers intact.
He threw himself onto his couch and rubbed his temples until he eventually fell asleep, easing his headache. Before reaching the safe state of sleep, he remembered one last jumbled thought:
False alarm. Lois…
****************
****************
An empty carton of ice cream lay next to the garbage, having missed it, and Lois lay on the couch, looking at the television without really seeing anything on it. Her mind was still whirling and even her body was tired from it. Her own words from the past two days were replaying themselves in her mind, as if on auto-rewind.
***“I do love you… as a friend.”
“Would you tell him I’m looking for him?”
“…you said you loved me, and then I said I couldn’t love you back that way, and then I said to send Superman… and I accepted Lex’s proposal…”***
Lois pulled a blanket off the arm of the couch and wrapped herself in it, realizing now that she was shivering. She sat up and curled her knees up to her chest, hugging them.
She had long ago figured out why she had hurt Clark so deeply. She just kept throwing his feelings in his face, saying all the wrong things. Plunging the knife deeper into his heart. Her own heartstrings were tearing, just thinking of how she was continuously making him feel. She was so concerned about losing HER best friend that she hadn’t stopped to think that she was HIS best friend too. And she was not doing a good job even being that to him. She was treating him more like an enemy, given how much she was hurting him, she mused. No wonder he ran away today, she thought. She knew it took a lot for him to go to her in the park today; he had to swallow his pride from yesterday’s rejection, and be her friend, because he knew she needed that. And she hurt him, probably when he thought that she couldn’t possibly hurt him any more.
“I will talk to you again, Clark Kent. This friendship is not over! I won’t let it be! And even if I say all the wrong things to you, you won’t run away. Not again. I can’t lose you. You can’t run….I won’t let you….” Her thoughts trailed off, as she fell into a restless sleep.
***************
***************
Clark awoke to find his head feeling better and his telephone ringing.
“Hello?” he asked, feeling completely rejuvenated.
“Clark… it’s Lois,” her voice said, sounding small still, but determined.
“Yeah, I know,” he said, and he couldn’t help smile at her tone, which was filled with so many emotions, all of which he thought were cute. “I’m sorry that I—“
“No, Clark, it’s my fault! Don’t apologize for running off. I am making it impossible every time I open my mouth to not hurt you and I am so sorry! I want to see you again. We’ll do this right, okay?”
“Okay, Lois,” he said, relieved that she wasn’t angry that he ran off so suddenly when she was trying to fix their possibly broken friendship.
“Oh,” she said, sounding a little surprised that he agreed after all the salt she added to the wound yesterday. “Great,” she said, recovering the sound of shock in her voice.
After he hung up the phone, Clark smiled, thinking this day would be better than the one before.
***************
***************
Lois stood on a busy Metropolis street, next to a street vendor, replaying her plan again in her head. She knew, after yesterday’s debacle, that having no speech prepared to say was just not the way to go. She was going through the lines in her head again, when she heard that familiar voice from behind her say her name. She turned, seeing his friendly grin greeting her.
“Clark!” she said, jumping into his arms. Physically attacking him wasn’t part of her “plan”, but it just sort of happened. She saw him, and knew she just needed to feel his arms around her, in one of those wonderful, familiar hugs. She wanted to feel his strong arms which always seemed to make everything seem okay. She quickly composed herself and pulled away.
“Sorry,” she explained. “I just…missed you. Missed our hugs and stuff,” she said, in almost a dreamlike state. She noticed she was looking at him and talking to him not the way she normally did, but the way she normally talked to… Superman.
“Why would I be talking like that to CLARK…” she wondered, but quickly shrugged it off as probably still feeling guilty. She returned herself to her Clark-mode. She looked down at the street and then back up at him.
“I miss those things too, Lois,” Clark said.
“Clark, I just want us to stay friends. I couldn’t bear to lose that. Not after… everything we’ve been through together.” She stopped uncomfortably and looked at him for a moment and then smiled, as if suddenly remembering something. “Remember when you first started working at the Planet and I stole your story?”
“How could I forget that? I think you had just finished telling me how upset you were that some guy who worked at the Planet a million years ago had done that to you. Breaking your heart. I think you thought of it as my hazing period,” he said, smiling at the memory now.
“Exactly! That’s what I said! You were all mad, but I was just initiating you into the fast-moving world of Metropolis news. It’s like the X-Files here, Clark, ‘trust no one’.”
“Well, Lois, I always trusted you. Right from the beginning. Even after that whole incident with the story. And I always trusted Perry and Jimmy.”
“Clark, it’s an expression. From the show. ‘Trust no one’, not ‘trust a few people’. Well you… you always trust everyone. See the best in everyone. Annoying, but it’s what I love about…” she stopped, now blushing and not meeting his gaze.
“You’re right Lois, we have been through a lot together,” he paused, and then let out a small laugh.
“What?” she asked, smiling now as well. “What!” she said when he continued laughing but not talking.
“One word for you, Lois: ‘Miranda’.” he finally said.
She instantly put her hands on her hot cheeks, growing embarrassed all over again at that incident. “Ah! Love Potion #9!” she laughed.
She shot him an evil eye when he continued laughing at the memory.
“How about our early honeymoon?” she asked coyly, almost regretting the example as soon as she said it, thinking it might hurt his feelings now. But he didn’t seem hurt by the memory. His laughter from before subsided, and he just smiled instead.
They both stopped talking, stopped remembering, practically stopped breathing for a long moment, looking into each other’s eyes. Lois finally broke contact.
“See, Clark, we’ve been through a lot. We’ve fallen out of planes, dealt with asteroids, amnesia, bombs, crazy love spells, and a whole lot more, which reminds me, I need to get better accident insurance but that’s not the point… I just really think that our—“
“Lois… I’m so sorry to do this, but I have to—“
And again he was starting to run off, mumbling something more to himself than to her. Lois looked at his retreating form in shock. She was furious. She didn’t think she’d said anything to insult him today. She was about to turn and head to her apartment angrily, but remembered suddenly her own vow to herself.
***“And even if I say all the wrong things to you, you won’t run away. Not again. I can’t lose you. You can’t run….I won’t let you…”***
The echo in her mind propelled her toward the alley he was heading into. She ran as fast as she could. She knew she had to catch up to him. Stop him. Make him talk to her; make him—
All thoughts froze and shattered as she rounded the alley corner just in time to see in the shadows her former partner spin quickly, not humanly…. into…. into Superman… and take off in the blink of an eye into the brilliant blue sky. She stood frozen in her tracks, thinking she must have seen wrong. She finally composed herself and ran over to where she had seen him. Nothing. No clothes. No shoes. No glasses…
No Clark....
She walked back out to the street, her mouth gaping open. Slightly. She was practically walking into people on the street. She didn’t care. She wasn’t exactly aware of anything. Except one thing…
Clark Kent was Superman.
**************
**************
Clark walked back to his apartment after a long Superman-duty, upset that the day had seemed to be going so well, and then fallen immaculately apart so suddenly. He had been forced to leave Lois and change without as much caution as he normally used because an orphanage had caught fire. He had run as quickly as he could at a humanly pace, which seemed way too slow when children’s screams were echoing in his ears, into an alley, which was also too far away for comfort. Hearing the children, all thoughts of looking over his shoulder and being cautious flew out the window. He noted to himself later that in the future, he just had to make that extra step to protect himself. As long as that extra step didn’t get him to the scene of the crime too late, he had to make it. But everything turned out okay and none of the children were harmed. Just as he was about to become Clark again and find Lois, he heard more screams. Of course. A bomb was in the Metropolis Town Hall. He removed it with only seconds left on the clock and then went on to prevent two planes from crashing.
All at the expense of his friendship with Lois.
Closing the door, he sighed, putting a hand through his hair, walking down the stairs.
“You’re home late,” he heard her voice say. He looked up, seeing her standing on the landing at the bottom of the stairs, looking up at him. He started running down the remaining two stairs.
“Lois! I was just about to call you! I—“
He stopped talking when he noticed she was staring at him. Wide-eyed, like she was in shock. Just staring.
“Are you okay?” he asked.
“Fine,” she said, clearly composing herself. “I, uh, I noticed you didn’t lock your door. So I let myself in. Gosh, Clark, you’re so careless. Don’t you care about your well-being? What would you do if a criminal came in, in the middle of the night? I mean, even when you DO lock your doors, you only have one terribly weak lock. What if someone broke in while you were in here. What would you do?” she said, looking at him challengingly.
“I, uh… don’t know. I could get better locks, if it would make you feel better,” he said, hoping that was the right answer to her obvious test. But she kept pressing on.
“What if he had a gun, Clark. What would you do? What if he shot you?”
“I…” he looked at her, unsure of what she wanted… what she was getting at. Clearly she was mad about him running off, he figured, but why the run-around about his locks?
“I mean, it’s just that you moved from the safest town in the world to the most dangerous city in the world and have less locks on your door here than your house there, and I’m starting to wonder why. I mean, what, Clark, do you think you’re Superman or something?” she asked, brazenly.
He looked past her and at the unlocked door he had just walked through. He took a deep, steady breath. He knew that tone. Lois Lane was furious with him and was not about to be acquiesced. “Lois, I know you’re mad that I ran off. I’m really sorry. Why don’t we talk now—“
“No, Clark, I don’t think that’s necessary. I’m beginning to see what our friendship means to you. And that’s fine. It’s not like we’ve been friends forever or anything. Better to know where you stand now, as opposed to later. I just want you to know that—“
She stopped and looked up at him. He fearfully looked at her, waiting for what she might say next.
*************
She wanted to say “I just want you to know that I know your secret, Mr. Mild Mannered Reporter, Clark Kent. You’re not SO clever! If you wanted to keep it a secret so badly, maybe you shouldn’t make the big switch out in public! I don’t trust you, I don’t even know you…”
But she couldn’t. She stared at his expectant eyes and grew madder by the minute. She wanted to say all those things. But a bigger part of her didn’t want to. She didn’t want to give him the opportunity to apologize, give his inevitable one hundred excuses about why he didn’t tell her, and she didn’t want to hear him lie anymore. Say he loved her. Say she is his best friend. Say that he trusts her. She would not let him know that she knew. She couldn’t.
“Lois?” he said after an excruciating silence.
“I just want you to know,” she started again, looking at the floor, her voice now a hoarse whisper, “that I do not consider you a friend anymore. You have hurt me in ways that I cannot forgive. I don’t trust you and don’t want you in my life.”
She looked up and didn’t miss the look on his face—like someone had just ripped his heart out.
She started up the stairs, wanting to get away while she was still feeling strong enough to. She couldn’t look into his eyes anymore. They seemed so honest. But she knew they weren’t. He was the poster symbol for the quote “looks can be deceiving.”
“Lois, please… don’t say that. We need to work this out. Talk to me. Don’t drive us further and further apart by running from me. Talk to me,” Clark pleaded, his eyes glazed over, his voice a little shaky.
Lois let her mouth fall open a little. How could he even SAY that, she wondered. After all his lies and betrayal. She turned on her heel at the door now, and looked at him. “I’m not the one doing the driving, Clark. You are.” She turned and put her hand on the door knob, ready to walk out of his life.
“No, Lois! Wait!” he called out… were those tears in his voice, she wondered. “Don’t marry Luthor!” he said in what she knew was desperation. Appalled again, she turned and just stared at him. “Lois, I know you’re mad at me. But please, just… don’t marry him. I know he seems—“
“Well, Clark, things aren’t always as they seem. And marrying Lex is the only good thing in my life right now. So you can sure see why I wouldn’t break off my engagement to him. There is nothing I would like more than to marry the man I love! If you can’t deal with that… then I don’t care,” she finished, her tone a cold, bleak shocking tremor. And with that, she was out the door.
**************
Alone.
Clark was now alone.
He didn’t know why, when he could have said anything as she was leaving, he decided to discuss Luthor… but he assumed it was desperation. Because she seemed serious. Serious about wanting him out of her life. He was desperate, as if that moment, right there, as she was leaving… was the last chance he would have to tell her not to ruin her life. His last chance to be her friend.
He stood in his forlorn apartment, wanting to just succumb to his emotions and cry. She had just shattered him. He felt like he was in pieces and did not know what to do. He had made her mad many times before, but she had never gone so far as to extricate him from her life, saying he was not her friend and that she didn’t trust him. He knew he’d hurt her by running off when they were just starting to get somewhere, but he thought it was a bit extreme. Maybe it was the last straw, and without warning he had used all his chances with Lois, and lost her.
Leaving him alone, again.
He resignedly walked up the stairs and locked the door.
