Interesting dilemma that Lois and Clark have to work through. Each takes a different view of a shared tragedy.
One part that made reading this difficult was the switching of the tenses in the narrative. You began in the present tense and then throughout switched back and forth to the past tense. You must stick to one tense.
Lois stared at the ceiling as tears start to stream down her face, “I can’t.”
“Can’t or won’t?” Clark hisses as he fixes his tie in the mirror.
Generally, most fiction written in the third person pov is in the past tense otherwise as a writer you have to be very conscious of time.
This all comes with practice.
gerry
