Lois & Clark Forums Forums Fan Fiction Lois & Clark Fanfic A Christmas idea.... (or in other words: A Round Robin)

A few months ago, some of us had riotus fun by being involved in a round robin. I'd like to do it again. I'd like to do a Christmas round robin.

Now here are a few ground rules:

• Anyone can contribute.
• You can't write immediately after you just posted. You have to wait until someone else does.
• Keep it PG
• You only get to post up to 77 words. No more!
• It ends on Christmas Day, and since I started it, I get to end it.

And yes, I realize that this should probably have been posted under fanfic challenges, but I thought we might get more writers if I posted here.





Feedback Thread

Here's the beginning: (77 words. )

In mid-December, Superman was flying over the North Pole when he heard Santa calling for help.

When Clark touched down, Santa put his hat on Clark and thrust his suit at him. He said, "I quit! And since you answered my call, you get to be Santa from now on."

"Santa, I can't do that!"

"You've got the hat and you've got the suit. You *are* Santa Claus." And in the twinkling of an eye, Santa disappeared.

But what Clark didn't have were the reindeers. No Dasher, no Dancer, no Prancer, no Vixen. No Comet, no Cupid, no Donner and no Blitzen.
Not even little red-nosed Rudolph to pull the sleigh with the presents.

Come to think of it, he didn't even have a sleigh, which wouldn't be too much of a problem for Superman. But being Santa without any gifts?

So he donned the Santa suit - big mistake - and flew towards the elves' workshop. Maybe they could help with this whole mess. Maybe they could tell him what to do.


Upon entering the workshop, the head elf shouted, "Santa, where have you been? Rudolph took off with all the other reindeer again and they have hidden the sleigh.

"Well, maybe... Santa took off with them."

"Kris... You are Santa. Remember?"

"Kris? Uh-oh, this doesn't sound good," Clark thought. "Who is Kris? Maybe the Santa who left me with the job? But why did he have to be reminded of being Santa?"

"Oh, don't tell me you got amnesia again," the head elf said.

"I guess I must have," Clark replied. 'Santa gets amnesia?'

"Oh, well, I guess we can go over this again. The main things you need are reindeer, a sleigh, presents, a deep voice, and some paunch. Guys, we're gonna need some pillows for this one."

"But... I..." Clark was perplexed. "Pillows?" I can't fly very well with pillows."

"Oh, no problem, Kris. The reindeer do that."

"I can fly fine by myself. And my name is not Kris."

"Sure you're not. And I'm Elvis Presley's little brother."

(To the vice-head elf, whispering) "We're gonna need the full treatment on this one.

Clark exploded. "What?"

"And I'm Lois!" came the voice from the smallest reindeer. Sure enough, it sounded pretty much like Lois. It looked pretty much like her, too.

"Hey, you!" Lois continued. "What do you mean by giving him the full treatment?"

"Lois!!!!" Clark exploded. "What are you doing here?"

"I'm a reporter, Superman. Ever heard of that? And I'm here to interview Santa!"

The head elf said, "Well, there he is. Gonna be hard though. He's lost the Christmas spirit and has to have *the* treatment."

"I *love* Christmas. But I'm Superman."

An elf said, "Riggghhhttt. Like Superman has a long white beard."

"But I... " At their hardened looks, Clark began floating in the air. Their looks turned to ones of shock. They weren't the only ones that were shocked.

Lois was pretty shocked, too.

"Superman! When did you grow that beard? You didn't have it a second ago!"

"It's the same thing every year," muttered another elf. "He won't remember. Keeps saying he isn't Santa, that he's Superman, or some such nonsense. Last year he actually managed to get away before we were fully done with him. That's why there were no Santa sightings last year."

"Now, wait a minute. I spent last Christmas eve with Lois, and I spent Christmas with my parents. Look, I was just flying over and Santa called for help. When I aswered his call he put this hat on me and gave me his suit. I am *not* Santa Claus."

An elf eyed him curiously. "You mean to tell me that somebody *else* put the hat on your head? Not you? Uh-oh."

"Uh-oh?" said another elf. "Make that nuh-oh! Are you telling me this beard isn't genuine?" And he grabbed Superman's beard and yanked.

"Ouch!!!" yelled Clark. "That hurt!"

"Of course it hurt. It's your beard, isn't it? And look down there, Santa. Can you see your toes?"

Horrified, Clark stared southwards. It was true, he couldn't see his toes. His magnificent, protruding belly was blocking his view.

Clark felt angst! "What about the pillows!! You said I could use pillows! Ahh... Wh... How... Argghhh...." He was hyperventilating. "How am I going to pick Lois up when she inevitably gets in trouble?" He thought that maybe a few quick flights around the world would take some of the weight off, so off he took.

Having flown around the world around a million times, he got rid of that protruding belly. Which left the beard to be coped with.

He flew back to the north pole and asked the head alf for a mirror. With that in hand, he made quick work of the beard.

Last but not least, he tried to get rid of the hat.

The hat came off surprisingly easy - especially since it hadn't moved once during all that flying. The beard, of course, grew right back. "Noooo... Please... Not the belly, too. Please!!"


The head elf leaned towards him. "You really are Superman, aren't you?" Clark nodded. "Okay, then, no belly - at least until you have to deliver the gifts, but Superman or not you are also Santa. At least until we can find Kris Kringle."

"Well, if that's all the problem there is, I can look for him with super-speed," Clark said.

He flew around the world again, but was unable to find Kris. At least he was able to locate his toes once again. Thanks to the flying.

The touched down in front of Lois. "I couldn't find Kris anywhere. And I have looked everywhere."

"Do you even know what Kris looks like without the Santa outfit?" Lois asked.

The head elf, Doc, came trudging out of the mine near the North Pole, from which the elves excavated some of the Christmas presents for all good boys and girls everywhere.

"Superman *is* Santa," Doc said impatiently. "We've just had some trouble turning him into Ol' Kris Kringle for a couple of years now. We're running out of Krystmas Kryptonite, you see."

"Then who the devil gave me this blasted hat?" Clark found himself yelling. "I didn't give it to myself! And I distinctly remember being other places, with other people the past few Christmases. And don't tell me I have amnesia!"

Clark sat down on the ice, almost ready to cry. Another thought struck him. "What's Lois doing here, anyway?"

Doc grinned at him. "You have to have a Mrs. Claus."

"WHAT?"

Lois and Clark shouted in almost the same instant.

"I'm not going to be Mrs. Claus!" Lois exclaimed annoyed. "She's not mentioned in *any* fairy tale. He's going to have the sleigh and I'm supposed to stay at home?"