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Pulitzer
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Pulitzer
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Hmmm... Maybe it really is Tank trying to throw us all off... Loved it  . Carol
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Kerth
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Kerth
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I'm gonna vote with those saying that it's Laura.  I think she's cleverly incorporated elements of everyone else's schtick into her story.
Lois: You know, I have a funny feeling that you didn't tell me your biggest secret.
Clark: Well, just to put your little mind at ease, Lois, you're right.
Ides of Metropolis
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Boards Chief Administrator Emeritus Nobel Peace Prize Winner
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Boards Chief Administrator Emeritus Nobel Peace Prize Winner
Joined: Apr 2003
Posts: 9,362 |
Make-up sex... and this is posted in the gfic folder? Just mentioning sex doesn't make it beyond a PG13 rating, Ann. So long as there's no explicit detail it's fine for gfic. LabRat
Athos: If you'd told us what you were doing, we might have been able to plan this properly.
Aramis: Yes, sorry.
Athos: No, no, by all means, let's keep things suicidal.
The Musketeers
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Kerth
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Kerth
Joined: Sep 2006
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Just read this story. And loved it. Lois as a naughty elf is priceless. But Lois fearing to be unable to talk to her own child - what with her babble gene and all - is even better. About the author... I've got no idea. Sure, there is a Batman reference (again), but that seems a little out-of-place, put in there to confuse us. So, I don't think it's Lara. One of her betas, though... That's a thought. That narrows down the field to... Sue, DJ, CatBruce and I don't know who else. Then, of course, it's obvious that there was a dirty mind at work. The elf who sleeps with the boss, indeed! Unfortunately, that hint doesn't quite narrow down the field, quite the contrary. 
The only known quantity that moves faster than
light is the office grapevine. (from Nan's fabulous Home series)
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Beat Reporter
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Beat Reporter
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I will admit that I have no idea who the author is, but I want to thank them for this line: "Who? Who is 'they'? Who is it that you think is out there breeding elves?"  I can see a spin-off from this where Lois & Clark head off to the North Pole to discover the identity of the evil villain who is breeding elves, probably in some strange plot to destroy Christmas. Nope? Just me and my weird sense of humour? OK then... (Alisha runs off and hides from the strange looks she's certain she's now being given!)
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Top Banana
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Top Banana
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I loved this story. Whoever you are, thanks for writing it. As for guessing, I don't think I'm going to be very good at it, but I'll take a swipe. At first I thought the humor reminded me of Queen of the Capes, but after reading Jojo's speculation about Sue... I can spot Sue's Lois and Clark a mile away. Even if she does hide them in married couples, pregnant Lois, and Batman references. And if it isn't... they did an excellent job of throwing me off their track and I applaud them. Cause I laughed my butt off at this one. Just perfect. I wonder if CC Aiken is still around. If she is, then this reminds me a bit of her dialogue style. Man, her banter between Clark and Lois always had me laughing. Oh, and Caroline, you had me ROTFL with this deduction: Then again, the Batman/Bruce reference could also be a red herring – the author wants us to think it’s Lara. But Lara would know that we might think it was a red herring, so maybe she put it in there on purpose, and who’s to say she hasn’t spent years building up an immunity to Iocaine powder... 
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Columnist
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Columnist
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That was such a wonderfully humorous story! I loved it!
As for guessing, my money's on Sue. And I won't go into all the reasons I think it is her. Better to leave people speculating.
Of course, I could be completely wrong.
Silence is golden.
Duct tape is silver.
~Saw it on a T-Shirt.
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Kerth
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Kerth
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A holiday story with a pregnant Lois? SERIOUSLY??? Whatever makes you guys think I'd write that? Or am I just that devious? 
Lois: You know, I have a funny feeling that you didn't tell me your biggest secret.
Clark: Well, just to put your little mind at ease, Lois, you're right.
Ides of Metropolis
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Features Writer
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Features Writer
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Nah, I don't think this one is Sue. Now if Lois drove a sleigh off a cliff to prove a point, or if the naughty elf suggested that she and Santa enter into a no-strings-attached sexual relationship, then we'd know it was the work of Da Queen.
Clark: "You don't even know the meaning of the word 'humility,' do you?"
Lois: "Never had a need to find out its meaning."
"Curiosity... The Continuing Saga"
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Features Writer
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Features Writer
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Very lovely story. pregnant Lois as naughty elf - nice idea! “Will I get to sit on Santa’s lap?” sorry, but I don't have a clue.
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Pulitzer
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Pulitzer
Joined: Jun 2006
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With every sigh, the air was escaping his body little by little, and if she kept it up, he’d probably lose so much air that he’d just sag to the pavement like an empty balloon. ROFLOL That would teach her, he thought, picturing the sorry, saggy little puddle of Clark-clothes on the sidewalk. “Then you should have negotiated for that a long time ago. There was nothing in our marriage vows about you getting to gripe.” Hahaha... That’s so Lois. “Fine. Don’t do it. You can help me pick out a Santa costume, and I’ll find someone else to be my elf.” Hey, I got to be Santa’s elf once - and dressed in a Girl Scout costume to boot. It’s not so bad, Lois! (Especially if Clark is Santa.) It’s a shame that I don’t have that episode of Frazier on DVD so I could do a screen shot... Some of the other Santas have told me that the cheaper ones can chafe... you know, in places guys don’t like to be chafed. Hehe... And the super suit wouldn’t chafe (if the guy wearing it wasn’t super...)? “I think I might like you better in this than in that concubine costume you wore that time.”
“Um, why don’t I let you two look around a bit?” The shop girl edged away from them. “Just... take whatever time you need. The dressing room is back there.” She nodded in the direction of a door and then practically ran to the front of the store.
“Nice touch,” Lois told him, once the girl was gone. “Didn’t think you had it in you.” Yes, it was a nice touch, Clark! Well, this writing style is surely familiar to me... but I can’t quite put my finger on it. But this: She put her hand protectively over the slight swelling of her abdomen. made me think of Tank. Would he fool us like that? (Nah, I really don’t think Tank wrote it.) This grammar gave me a clue. The writer is not likely from Britain or trained in British English. I loved the sense of humor in this story! It was great. I think I have this narrowed down to a couple of authors. But like Lara said: This is hard because I see a few possible authors. There are obvious clues along the way that seem to point to several different people and I'll betcha whoever wrote it did all that on purpose!! So I could be really wrong! I’ve already mentioned Tank, but I think some one (maybe even Tank) is trying to throw us off track. I thought at first it could be Lara Moon, but would she really mention Batman in a fic where she didn’t want anyone to guess? But she could have still mentioned him to throw us off. In the end, though, I don’t think Lara wrote it either. My thoughts are leaning towards Caroline (even if she did tell us she didn’t know who wrote it). Then again, the Batman/Bruce reference could also be a red herring – the author wants us to think it’s Lara. Ah, but Lara isn’t the only one that’s written Bats into her stories! I can think of a handful right off the top of my head. A holiday story with a pregnant Lois? SERIOUSLY??? Whatever makes you guys think I'd write that? Or am I just that devious? Devious. And I bet you could copy a lot of people’s style... But I don’t think you wrote it. Great story!
~~Even heroes have the right to dream.~~
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Nobel Peace Prize Winner
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Nobel Peace Prize Winner
Joined: Aug 2005
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I wonder if CC Aiken is still around. If she is, then this reminds me a bit of her dialogue style. Like BJ, I thought this reminded me a bit of CC Aiken. The sweet funny sexiness and vulnerability of the characters made me think of CC's style. Ah well, I'm still going to say that it was probably Laura who wrote it. Oh, and speaking of other things... it's great to have you back here, Nancy! Ann
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Pulitzer
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Pulitzer
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At first I thought Elisabeth wrote this, but then I just don't see her doing the naughty Elf thing...er, that is not how I meant that to sound.
I don't imagine her writing about naughty Elves. Yeah, much better.
So I think that that author has to be Laura S.
James.
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Boards Chief Administrator Emeritus Nobel Peace Prize Winner
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Boards Chief Administrator Emeritus Nobel Peace Prize Winner
Joined: Apr 2003
Posts: 9,362 |
I'm not going to make any guesses as I truly suck at recognizing style. It means zip to me. “I’m not doing this,” Lois said for the tenth time since they’d left the Planet. “You can do it if you want, but I’m not doing it.” I just love this as an opening line. Brilliant hook. She looked outraged, and then, in a split-second moment of calculation, she arranged her face into a pout instead. “You yelled at me.” He thought about not taking the bait, but then he realized that this had the potential to be one of those conversations that led to make-up sex... and Lois wasn’t the only one who could be calculating. LOL! I could have quoted just about every line here - they all had me LOLing. Hmmmm. A confident author with a distinct flair for comic dialogue and narrative.... Nope. I'm stumped. If I was going to guess, I'd say...CC...but then I'm not going to guess, so... Or...wait a minute. Something about that sign off suggests Kathy Brown to me. But then she's not writing LNC at the moment, so.... Okay, not guessing. Had a fun time reading this one, though. I just loved Calculating!Clark, the back and forth banter, the two of them vying to embarrass the heck out of the other and the whole conversation was just a really lovely, sweet, cute and funny moment from our heroes' day. LabRat
Athos: If you'd told us what you were doing, we might have been able to plan this properly.
Aramis: Yes, sorry.
Athos: No, no, by all means, let's keep things suicidal.
The Musketeers
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