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#49632 02/14/08 11:14 AM
Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 1,363
Top Banana
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Top Banana
Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 1,363
Shayne, if this is an iota as good as "Family Hour" I'm already hooked! Very nice Shayne.
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Lois Lane. How often had she despised her parents for giving her that name, no matter how into Superman her parents had been? It hadn’t been worth the years of teasing, the snickers, and the double takes when people saw her name on applications.

It hadn’t helped that she’d been drawn to journalism. The name had made her have to work three times as hard as her colleagues just to be taken seriously. She could have changed it, or chosen a pen name, but by the time it had occurred to her she’d been too stubborn.

Her parents had saddled her with the name and she would live up to it.

She just had to hope that it wouldn’t kill her.
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For all that she hated the name Lois Lane, this was a world that desperately needed a Superman.
I am a bit confused right now. Is this *"the Lois Lane"* or are we traveling through worlds?
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Lana was going to kill him.

This was going to be the fourth time he was late for dinner in a row, but it was beginning to be hard for him to care.

Glancing around, Clark stepped into an alleyway. Lana would have an aneurysm if she knew he was still doing this, but flying was the one thing he refused to give up. It was too much a part of him, and even with all the risk, it was one of the only things he enjoyed any more.

He rose into the air quickly, but carefully staying slow enough not to create a sonic boom. Hiding what he was had become a part of him a long time ago. Lana’s countless diatribes had pushed the point home.

Yet the longer he went hiding what he was, the more distant he felt from Lana. All she saw was the image of normality that she wanted to see. He felt like he was drowning, and now that she was pushing for marriage, he sometimes found himself wishing he could fly away forever and never come back.

He’d been losing bits and pieces of himself for as long as he knew her, sacrificing the things that were important to him for her sake. It was almost as though she’d been intentionally isolating him from everyone else in order to have him to herself.
I sense this "Lana who doesn't really love Clark for who/what he is except to her convenience" theme to your stories, which is fine because I love it when she has Clark convinced that no one will ever accept him...and then Lois comes along and shatters her plan!

Was that a run-on sentence? rotflol
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The world had changed, and he was going to find out what had happened to it. It wasn’t just the disappearance of Metropolis. It was everything. The attitudes of the air traffic controllers, the threats of blowing an American plane out of the sky. This was a scary new world.
Okay, Shayne, hurry back so I can start to figure things out! rotflol

~Sheila


I'm a firm believer in the fact that God doesn't put any more on us than we can bear. He does however make us come to Jesus every so often.
#49633 02/14/08 03:17 PM
Joined: Jan 2007
Posts: 1,069
BJ Offline
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Shayne, you have such a beautiful style. I'm just in awe of how each scene flows between Lois and Clark from threat of death to rain to lightning to bringing the injured to safety.

I'll ditto what everyone else has said about being intrigued with the premise of your story. Those poor people on the plane - Clark saved them, but if they can't figure out how to get back to their own world, it'll affect their families the same.

I can't wait to see what happens next.
BJ

#49634 02/17/08 04:47 PM
Joined: Jun 2003
Posts: 1,763
Merriwether
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Merriwether
Joined: Jun 2003
Posts: 1,763
WHOA! I am very interested to see what happens next!!!!!

Excellent so far!

Quote
Lois Lane. How often had she despised her parents for giving her that name, no matter how into Superman her parents had been? It hadn’t been worth the years of teasing, the snickers, and the double takes when people saw her name on applications.

It hadn’t helped that she’d been drawn to journalism. The name had made her have to work three times as hard as her colleagues just to be taken seriously. She could have changed it, or chosen a pen name, but by the time it had occurred to her she’d been too stubborn.

Her parents had saddled her with the name and she would live up to it.

She just had to hope that it wouldn’t kill her.
Hehe - I like and I am now made very curious!

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He’d been losing bits and pieces of himself for as long as he knew her, sacrificing the things that were important to him for her sake. It was almost as though she’d been intentionally isolating him from everyone else in order to have him to herself.
I like how that was put. Poor Clark. mad

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A moment later he blinked, his vision returning. He stared below him. Metropolis was gone.
What!? What on earth happened?

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The world had changed, and he was going to find out what had happened to it. It wasn’t just the disappearance of Metropolis. It was everything. The attitudes of the air traffic controllers, the threats of blowing an American plane out of the sky. This was a scary new world.
Oh dear. Where and when is he?

I'm very curious to see what happens next! I do hope there's a part two already up.


I've converted to lurk-ism... hopefully only temporary.
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