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Pulitzer
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Pulitzer
Joined: Apr 2003
Posts: 3,454 |
Oh, wow. Oh, wow, CC! I barely know where to start! First, I love your title, and as I read the story I see just how well it fits. What a wonderful idea: that Clark should start dropping his disguise (and I love the way you describe all his little habits which he uses to distinguish himself from Superman) solely around Lois to encourage her to see him as he really is. Your explanation for why he can't just come out and tell her is very convincing and, once more, very well written: But Clark knew why he didn’t tell. He knew exactly why he’d never take off the glasses, never reveal the man hidden underneath. He knew and he hated himself for it. On a night long since passed into their memories, he had held Lois as Superman and been the sole witness to her anguish over Clark Kent’s “death.” That had been a lie unlike any other. He and Superman and Lois were locked into it. Try as he might, he just couldn’t see any way out.
[...]
He had lied to Lois. Not by omission. Not with a little fib to get him to a rescue. Not using one of a series of “white lies”, the kind he had long since accepted as completely necessary. No. This was a different kind of lie. A back-breaking lie. A lie from which there was no escape. Trapped in it, as he was, not one day had gone by that he hadn’t suffered for it, cursed himself for it. And yet, done nothing about it. Take off the glasses? Right. And in so doing, tear the heart out of the woman he loved? He couldn’t do it. He just couldn’t. And I love your (too-brief) description of the night he came back to Lois! And then your description of how he's been changing his behaviour around Lois is terrific. I loved this: He had taken to shedding the boxy jackets that camouflaged his build, and the distracting ties that were, well, distracting. Clark was practically doing a daily striptease in front of Lois, if you tallied all the things he had taken off. The stammering, the fidgeting, the hesitancy, the apologetic posture. All now tossed aside as soon as they were alone. Discarded as surely as the jacket and tie. ROFL!!  ) Wendy (begging for more) was searching for an on-my-knees-and-begging graemlin, but can't find one!
Just a fly-by! *waves*
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Columnist
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Four times a day posting schedule sounds great to me!
This was an excellent first installment. I, too, loved the daily striptease.
I'm looking forward to more,
Irene
I try to take one day at a time, but sometimes several days attack me at once.
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Boards Chief Administrator Emeritus Nobel Peace Prize Winner
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Boards Chief Administrator Emeritus Nobel Peace Prize Winner
Joined: Apr 2003
Posts: 9,362 |
Athos: If you'd told us what you were doing, we might have been able to plan this properly.
Aramis: Yes, sorry.
Athos: No, no, by all means, let's keep things suicidal.
The Musketeers
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Pulitzer
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CC WOW! An excellent start!  I enjoyed it immensely and look forward to reading the next part. Please post it soon.  Tricia 
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Kerth
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Kerth
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Cool!!!  Wow!! Clark is terified of telling her... why? :p more!!! Jose 
"Practice up your shielding spells...and remember to duck if you see green light coming your way." Harry Potter to Wizengamot in OotP trial A Bad Week in the Wizengamot
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Top Banana
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Top Banana
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Ab-so-lute-ly Brilliant! Wow. Double-wow. It's beautiful and funny and ever-so poignant, and I adore your narrative style. Darn-near perfect. There were many fantastic lines, but I think this was my favourite: <Don’t look away.> He reminded himself. <She can smell fear. It works on so many levels at the same time - it's kinda funny, but it also shows us how well he knows her, and it tells us just how hard he's trying to make his new strategy work. Poor Clark! Post more soon, please!Yvonne
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Pulitzer
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Yeah, what they said -- wow.  Beautifully written, and Clark's thinking processes make sense in a uniquely Clark sort of way <g> I almost didn't start reading this; after how intense the first two had been, I wasn't sure my heart could stand the strain  But I'm glad I did... this is fabulous. So, with posting four times a day, I think we're due another post right about... now. PJ
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Top Banana
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Top Banana
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Okay since I'm late to the posting party everyone else took the good adjectives!! *pout* Seriously..CC, this is fabulous! Clark's inner narrative had me alternating between cracking up and saying awwwwww. Plus all the insights into Clark's affectations when he is in the guise of Superman v. "plain ole" Clark. So many things that I didn't really think about but really add up. I hope that you aren't like the rest of these feedback hungry authors and want to appease us all by posting ASAP!!  Can't wait for Part 2! ~Liz
Lois: Can I go?
Clark: No.
Lois: Oh come on, Clark, why do we go through this? We both know I’m going to go.
Clark: Then why do you ask?
Lois: I’m trying to be nice.
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Beat Reporter
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Beat Reporter
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CC, you know I love your stories! and I'm so happy you are writing more after Superman Undone BUT I was getting spoiled being able to read the entire story in one sitting. And now you've joined us here learning to torture fans by using the Installment method  I would like to second all of the others about how great this started and hope, along with others, that this will be posted, POST HASTE! Torturing FanFic fans is highly overrated!
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Columnist
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Wow! This is soo gooood. So spectacularly good. And speaking of spectacular, I loved when Clark told himself that he was And then I read Clark knew it was neither of those, and much less complicated. It simply boiled down to trust. Only he was allowed to see Lois Lane as she was now, so unguarded and vulnerable. She trusted him enough to fall asleep his lap. She trusted Clark Kent with her friendship, a true gift he knew not many enjoyed. She trusted Superman with her life, taking crazy chances in complete faith that he would be there. Lois trusted him not to lie. Not to be a lie. Even when he stammered his flimsy excuses and ran off, she merely rolled her eyes at him and huffed something about his weirdness. But she never turned her investigative skills on him. Never put her calculating, brilliantly suspicious mind to work on Clark Kent or Superman. Clark's reasoning  is very insightful. I can buy it without any problems. And his fear of a chicken pox scar. Gotta love it. Story is great and the writing is fantastic. I agree. Four postings in a day would make me happy. gerry
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Beat Reporter
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I loved the two other 'Un'stories, CC and I'm sure this one will be just as brilliant! This first part is so wonderful! Poor Clark - his anguish is almost palpable. Imagine being proud of a chicken pox scar! He's so endearing. More soon, please!
Lois: Well, I like my quirks. I think they make me unique.
Clark: You certainly are unique.
Clark: You're high maintenance, you know that?
Lois: But I'm worth it!
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Pulitzer
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Hi, Interesting piece. MAF 
Maria D. Ferdez.
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Don't like Luthor, unfinished, untitled and crossover story, and people that promises and don't deliver. I'm getting choosy with age.
MAF
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Pulitzer
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Hey CC I agree with everyone, what a fabulous start! I really love the way you are in Clarks head. He is so sweet, poor Clark. I am looking forward to more very soon. Laura
Clark: “If we can be born in an instant, and die in an instant, why can’t we fall in love in an instant?”
Caroline's "Stardust"
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Freelance Reporter
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Freelance Reporter
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And a massive, uniform sigh is heard all around. My goodness! This was fantastic! I had a particularly insufferable day, what with the first day of the end of my life (aka. Senior Year of High School), but I was so glad to read something that made this day well worth it. I am anxiously waiting for the second installment...and the third... and the-- why don't you just post it in one big post! Sounds like a plan . At any rate, this was incredible, and am hoping tomorrow a post will be here to make the second day of the end of my life bearable. Impressed, Jo
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Top Banana
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Thank you all so much! That doesn't seem adequate, all of your compliments and good words have just knocked me over. Thank you for reading it, for taking the time to comment on it, for being so generous with your praise. Labrat, who has coaxed this piece out of the womb, so to speak, told me I should post every two days. She seemed fairly certain about this. However, Wendy, who some might argue is not unfamiliar with these boards, seemed to think that 4xs/daily wouldn't be uncalled for. Hmm.....Who to believe? Two such great writers and I am certain neither would give bad advice! That's not to forget Jo, sweet Jo, who just attended the first day of the end of her life, and who needs a post tomorrow so that the second day (this will be an on-going count, I'm guessing) of said end will go down smoother. What kind of cold heart wouldn't take pity on that? Maybe one who had that same last year herself, only about half a lifetime ago. Wendy,Irene,Labrat,Tricia,Jose,Yvonne,Pam,Liz,Trenna,gerry,Xanabee,Maria,Laura, and Jo, thank you! This is really fun. CC-
You mean we're supposed to have lives?
Oh crap!
~Tank
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Features Writer
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Wow...CC, I read this this morning, and hoped that by now I would be able to come up with some coherent comments, but I just can't. This is fantastic. I was bowled over by the first two stories in the 'Un' Series, and I think the third is going to just totally overwhelm me. Those posting before me have expressed what my sentiments are about the story more eloquently than I could right now, so I'll probably just say 'ditto' and suggest that you read their comments and compliments again. But I have to quote something. Anyone who ever reads my comments knows that I almost always quote a favorite passage, yet here I have so many that it was hard to choose one. Wendy already highlighted several that I loved. Let's face it, I was mesmerised right from the opening... He could just take off the glasses. Say that all the reading was giving him eye strain, announce that in an off-hand way, and then just sit back and wait for Lois to look up from her own reading, for the comprehension to spread slowly over her face. That could work.
Then maybe this could be The Night, the one that they would eventually tell their children about, their grandchildren too. The Night that Daddy finally told Mommy. It would be like an anniversary date, they would mark it on the calendar, celebrate it with expensive dinners, fine wine... This is so incredible. And to respond to your notes at the beginning of your story, thank you for breaking all of your three rules. ![[Linked Image]](http://images.bravenet.com/brpics/smilie/heartbeat.gif) By the time the story has finished unfolding, I imagine that I will have thanked you again, several times... And last but by no means least, let me say that LabRat and Wendy are equally respected and esteemed authors in this fandom. But in regard to a posting schedule, you should definitely listen to Wendy. Kathy
"Our thoughts form the universe. They always matter." - Babylon 5
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Boards Chief Administrator Emeritus Nobel Peace Prize Winner
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Boards Chief Administrator Emeritus Nobel Peace Prize Winner
Joined: Apr 2003
Posts: 9,362 |
Labrat, who has coaxed this piece out of the womb, so to speak, told me I should post every two days. She seemed fairly certain about this. Yes, this was my fault. Bad beta! <g> When CC asked me about a posting schedule for some reason I got what day we were on confused and thought that posting segment two on Thursday represented a EOD (Every Other Day) posting schedule. Well, actually it's no real mystery as I'm quite frequently confused as to what day of the week it is these days. CC, if I'd realised at the time I was hoplessly befuddled I'd have suggest an EOD instead. So, I reckon segment two should go up at some point today. LabRat (who for some reason woke up this morning thinking, "Hang on...that's two days not one!" <g> )
Athos: If you'd told us what you were doing, we might have been able to plan this properly.
Aramis: Yes, sorry.
Athos: No, no, by all means, let's keep things suicidal.
The Musketeers
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Top Banana
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LOL, Labrat, now we're both confused!
It has just been one day since part one went up. Math not being my strong suit, but that was yesterday, Tues, so you had it right the first time. If I went EOD, as my good beta recommended, tomorrow would the time to post part 2.
Am I right? Or has that whole time-travel complication reared its head?
Anyway, nevermind all that, I am just going to take your previous post to heart and run with it. Part two is sitting, lonely and ready to go, and the suspense is killing me.
CC
You mean we're supposed to have lives?
Oh crap!
~Tank
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Boards Chief Administrator Emeritus Nobel Peace Prize Winner
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Boards Chief Administrator Emeritus Nobel Peace Prize Winner
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Eeesh...yes, I'm even more confused than I thought I was. I thought it was posted Monday. :rolleyes: But then, considering I woke up yesterday thinking it was the weekend, this probably wasn't hard. Okay, then you would have been bang on target posting tomorrow. Know all about itching to post though and schedules be darned. <g> LabRat (erm...this is Wednesday...right?)
Athos: If you'd told us what you were doing, we might have been able to plan this properly.
Aramis: Yes, sorry.
Athos: No, no, by all means, let's keep things suicidal.
The Musketeers
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Top Banana
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Wow! This is just so great! I love the whole concept of Clark trying to un-do the little habits he's adopted to create a distinction between Clark and Superman - making himself smaller and less sure in his own skin. Hoping desperately that Lois will pick up on it. Loved the thought of a little Clark with just one chicken pox scar and being oh so proud of it. It breaks my heart, the thought that he felt so different his whole life that something like that made him feel like he belonged. Just love that he uses his sexy little whisp of hair to camouflage it now - shows how much of his appearance he has to manipulate to keep his secret safe. Nothing is left to chance. This whole story is just perfect - I'm going to go read part 2, and whatever you and LabRat have worked out mathematically, post the rest ASAP! In the meantime, I'll go to the archive and read the other "Un" stories 'cause if they're half as good as this, I got some good stuff to read. Lynn
You know that boy'd walk on water for you? Or he'd drown tryin'. -Perry White to Lois in Just Say Noah
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