Lois & Clark Forums Forums Fan Fiction Lois & Clark Fanfic FDK: The Evening After a Door Slams

Feedback welcome on this part or the entire trilogy.

Bob

Where is that "puddle of goo" icon I've seen somewhere on these boards...

Beautiful story, =) I especially like the comparison of Clark and Lex... it's definitely there even though it isn't explored often. I also liked how Lois reacted once Clark got back... past the anger, mostly, but with everything they still needed to work through there... I also liked Clark's desperate attempts to 'go first'......

I wonder if Mayson took the day off after her shock and survived in this world...

And very nice untwist on the nukes!

Oooohhh....puddle of goo indeed..
So romantic! So heartwarming! A darn good story.

Good point! I wonder why Superman was that dumb on the show! (oh, of course, to make the show go). But it's bits like that that make it harder to maintain your willing suspension of disbelief - when you stare at the screen and shout out, "WTF?" (or similar.)

Good revelation here. And evil you for delaying the talk between Clark & Lois! It leaves that much more time for angst.

The essence of Superman. It's not having the powers, it's what you do with the powers.

Mature. This is often overlooked in revelation fics.

Well done, bobbart!

Wow! That was wonderfully waffy! Thanks for sharing.

~Sheila

Oh, a total waff fest, bob! I just read all three parts and really enjoyed them!

Thanks for sharing,
JD

Loved this! It was just a perfect end to my day. Thank you. And I went back and read the first story also and I wasn't disappointed. Both stories are just lovely. Great job. Laura

Bravo! I love stories where there is a realistic Lois. Excellent, really excellent.

Yep, it was a really sweet ending, Bob

The untwist on the nukes was hilarious.

So, did Mayson remain among to living?

The rose was sweet and the symbolism great

Michael

I LOVE THIS! and so true.

I had wondered, at first, if I had forgotten to read the end of the last part in the trilogy. Then I realized that you had added to the ending.

I've enjoyed all three pieces of the trilogy.

I wish I had some more insightful feedback, but the best I can do is ditto what has already been said.


Elisabeth

Read all three parts today, and they're just lovely. It's that classic two-steps-forward, one-step-back dance that L&C are famous for, but the overall movement is forward. You write them well.

I'd call it emotional wallowing, but it's much more like a soak in a jacuzzi. Just letting the bubbles of angst and romance fizz around you, enjoying the whole experience. Delightful.

PJ

First off I want to that everyone for their interest and support for this story. For me it represented a number of firsts including:
1. First episode adaptation
2. First revelation
3. First attempt at extreme WAFF-only story
I hope that generally my efforts were enjoyable. I struggled hugely with how angry Lois would be after the revelation. Being as much a romantic as I am, my first plan was to have her be very accepting and forgiving. However, given all that happened between BatP through TOGoM, the only possible reaction that I see is that she would be furious. That’s why I felt the need to defer the revelation until the second evening. I fear that had he told her his identify before she had come to accept her own feelings for Clark, she might have kicked him out forever.

Sara:
I’m glad you enjoyed it. The comparisons to Lex are so obvious that I’ve always been surprised that I don’t remember reading more of this type of comparison. Then again, I haven’t been around that long. As for Mayson, the main reason for the kiss outside the conference room was so that Mayson could see it, get upset, take the day off, and survive. I don’t like Mayson that much but I wanted to save her if I could. As for the nuke-untwist, I really did always think it was a dumb plan. Clark is way-too-smart to have done what they wrote n the original episode.

IolantheAlias:
Thank you. You’re too kind. I’m glad you thought the Revelation -> Exit worked. I was worried that it was a bad idea to have it happen that way. As for it being about how the powers are used, I simply “borrowed” that from many other fics that are far better than mine. Finally, about the lying and who is hurting whom, that is open to debate. I choose to think that Clark is insecure and fearful which leads him to do the things he does that causes Lois pain. I honestly believe that he was hurt also. On the balance, I believe he does way more “bad” to Lois via his lies and other transgressions than she does to him. That is why *he* is the one on his knees begging for forgiveness. However, it’s my view that he takes a few emotional blows of his own.

Sheila:
Thanks, I hope it wasn’t too WAFFy.

JD:
I’m glad all three parts held up when read together. It was my pleasure to offer it.

Laurach:
It was my pleasure to help make the end of your day as good as possible.

cp33:
I’m glad you felt that I got at least close to a realistic Lois. I kept thinking I was portraying her *way* too soft.

Michael:
I knew I had to deal with the A-plot if I was going to have them at dinner that evening. Saving Mayson took more thought than dealing with the nukes. That plan was soooo bad.
As to the Rose, my feeling was that Clark would be thinking that under the circumstances, Lois would not tolerate him saying the ILU phrase. So in his mind a single red rose was a way to say that without getting into too much more trouble. Of course, Lois was *really* angry and the rose provided the perfect opportunity for her to “slap” him *hard* without damaging her hand. Of course, I’m way too soft so I found a way for Clark to say the ILU phrase anyway by having Lois not pick up on what he was scared to say.

rkn:
Clark was horrible to Mayson. He can be either callous or clueless. As I said before, correctly or incorrectly, I choose clueless. He certainly does enough really stupid things in the series to be a candidate for cluelessness.

Elisabeth:
Added to the ending? Are you thinking of the kiss outside of the conference room? If I added anything else it was unintentional. I’m glad you liked the set.

PJ:
Wow, thanks. I’m so happy you liked it. It’s very sappy. I was trying to go *way over* in that direction just to see what I could do.

Again, thanks everyone for reading and for the feedback.
Bob

It's taken me awhile to get around to reading all three of the stories, but I wanted to say I really enjoyed them.

You wrote Clark - his thoughts and feelings - exactly how I always imagined him.

I loved it when Clark let his Superman persona slip - just enough to thoroughly panic Lois.

Bah that was just completly awesome. I enjoyed it throughly.


Revelation/cusp of their relationship stories always get me hooked, but this one gets a gold star!

Female Hawk:
Thanks for the feedback. I’m glad you enjoyed the “slip” by Clark in Morning After.
This, however,
Really makes my day. Thank you so much. (Now, get back and finish “Weekend in Smallville.” Please???


SuperRoo:
I’m flattered by an “awesome” and “gold star” mention in the same FDK. You are too kind. I'm also a huge sucker for these stories. Lots of opportunity for both and a bit of angst.


Bob

This was a perfect conclusion for the trilogy. The first and second part were great but this part exceeded it all. I loved it!

Andreia

I loved this story. It was sooo.... soooo.... Lois and Clark!
Very believable characters. Very believable episode(s).

Loved your re-write of the nuclear weapons truck. Clever indeed!

This is probably the best revelation story I've read in a while. I loved the way you made it come about, and how you made both Lois and Clark deal with it.

Great story! Thanks for sharing!!

Andreia:
Thank you soooo much. I was really fretting that I hadn't been able to maintain the quality throughout all three parts. It's really nice to think that maybe I did. I'm sure that I still some more WAFFy stories "in the tank" for the future.

Lisamaree:
Now this... Wow! I just don't know what to say. I couldn't ask for a better compliment. Thank you very much.

Bob

What a great ending, Bob! I loved how Clark dealt with telling Lois the truth (and how he didn't wait for a year and a day after getting together to tell her the truth).

Lois reaction was very nicely handled. It's hard to imagine she would not get angry at all, but I love the fact that she gets over it fairly quickly - manages to remain fairly rational throughout.

anonpip:
It seemed that the combination of the fact that within the previous 24 hours they had both admitted how they each felt combined with the knowledge that Clark was going to tell her the secret himself that evening would serve to help blunt Lois's anger.

I'm glad you enjoyed it. Thanks for the feedback.

Bob