|
Joined: Dec 2008
Posts: 2,181 Likes: 29
Kerth
|
OP
Kerth
Joined: Dec 2008
Posts: 2,181 Likes: 29 |
FDK here. Thanks.
|
|
|
Joined: Feb 2008
Posts: 2,823
Pulitzer
|
Pulitzer
Joined: Feb 2008
Posts: 2,823 |
I almost started crying when I read this again. It's incredibly moving.
|
|
|
Joined: Dec 2004
Posts: 326
Beat Reporter
|
Beat Reporter
Joined: Dec 2004
Posts: 326 |
Beautiful, entrancing, lovely and very moving. It felt wonderful to read and it was so easy to get lost in your wonderful dialogue and descriptions. I loved that Lois asked him to marry her and that she saw with his tears how moved he was
robinson
|
|
|
Joined: Aug 2008
Posts: 45
Blogger
|
Blogger
Joined: Aug 2008
Posts: 45 |
Wow, this is really moving and incredibly well written!
Thanks for sharing this with us!
|
|
|
Joined: Apr 2008
Posts: 1,371 Likes: 1
Top Banana
|
Top Banana
Joined: Apr 2008
Posts: 1,371 Likes: 1 |
Hi Female Hawk Or perhaps this would be most appropriate Parts like this are not intended to invoke a feeling of sweetness and light. I believe my reaction is a tribute to a well designed and executed anti-WAFF “bomb” that you set off in those parts. Unfortunately, I ended up so upset that I didn’t even look at the boards for three days. On the plus side, by the time I recovered, I get to read your fabulously executed part 7 (I loved the Jonathan section AND the golf outing with Sarah) as well as this part at the same time. So, now that I got all of that out of the way, how about some part 8 FDK? I liked the fact that Lois had to call Martha to come pick her up. (Did she take the bus or something?) Anyway, it set things up nicely to trigger her thoughts of her Mom. I still find it interesting that she misses them far more now than she ever seemed overtly valued them when they when they were alive. I know that has been a theme throughout this story but I continue to find it fascinating. I think this has to be my most favorite part: Lois contemplated her doubtfully. “If I was to leave now, leave and promise never to come back. If you never told Clark I’d been here ... would he heal?”
“Oh, he’d heal,” Martha said with quiet conviction. “But he’d never be whole.”
Lois felt her tears rise again, even as the heavy burden of condemnation rolled away from her heart. She smiled tremulously at Martha. “What do you want me to do?”
Martha’s answering smile laid the foundation for their future friendship. “I want you to go to Clark’s room and unpack your bags,” she said. “When he comes in, I’ll send him to you.”
“You know I’m going to tell him I love him?” Lois warned.
Martha’s smile widened and tears pooled again in her eyes. She stood and dropped a maternal kiss on Lois’s forehead, then began clearing away their plates and cups. I thing your whole Lois & Clark section was very well done. There is *so* much here that I like, but I’m not going to quote all of it back. However, this was particularly insightful” “When you needed me most ... I wasn’t there for you either.”
“When did -?”
“The first time you said ‘I’m Superman’. The first time you said it to me, the first time you’d said it to anyone.” This really got me to thinking aobut what almost every variation of Clark puts on the line when he reveals himslef to Lois. And finally: He looked. They were floating a foot off the ground.
“Did *you* do that?” she asked, her eyes sparkling.
“No,” he said honestly. “You did.” Is just a perfect end to this part. Bob
|
|
|
Joined: Oct 2006
Posts: 117
Hack from Nowheresville
|
Hack from Nowheresville
Joined: Oct 2006
Posts: 117 |
I loved this chapter! It was just beautiful! The raw emotion was wonderful. It was so clear how vunerable Lois felt that I wanted to cry with her.
~Mel~
|
|
|
Joined: Apr 2003
Posts: 2,837
Pulitzer
|
Pulitzer
Joined: Apr 2003
Posts: 2,837 |
Great part! Now for a nice wrap-up. Artemis
History is easy once you've lived it. - Duncan MacLeod Writing history is easy once you've lived it. - Artemis
|
|
|
Joined: Dec 2008
Posts: 2,181 Likes: 29
Kerth
|
OP
Kerth
Joined: Dec 2008
Posts: 2,181 Likes: 29 |
Iolanthe - I'm very glad you enjoyed it. robinson - Thanks for your generous FDK. You've described exactly what I was trying to achieve, so fuzzy - Thanks for your comments. I appreciate you posting FDK. Bob - AAHHH - I feel so bad that I cost you a night's sleep. Hey - absolutely no apology needed. I knew before I began posting that this fic wouldn't be for everyone. I also knew some would begin reading and not want to continue - both situations are completely understandable. Seven years ago, when my mother was dying, there is no way I could have read a fic like this. I would have bailed out at the very beginning of Part 2. An 'anti-WAFF bomb' - I love that description. About how Lois got to Smallville - I sort of piggy-backed off Weekend in Smallville when she flew to a nearby airport and then came into the town of Smallville. Sorry I didn't make it clear. I was thinking - golf in the morning, a hastily arranged flight, arriving in Smallville late afternoon, feeling not really prepared. Re - Lois missing her parents. I think because everyone has/had parents, it's such a fundamental part of us. So, if they're not there, it leaves a hole in our lives - regardless of how good/not so good the relationship was. Maybe it's also a bit of 'not knowing what you've got until it's gone'. Is just a perfect end to this part. Actually, it's probably the perfect end to the fic ... but after so much pain, I thought we deserved more than half a chapter of togetherness. melray - Thanks for your wonderful comments. It's great you could feel Lois's uncertainty. Artemis - Thanks for your FDK. Yep, just the wrap-up to go. Corrina.
|
|
|
Joined: Apr 2003
Posts: 4,058
Pulitzer
|
Pulitzer
Joined: Apr 2003
Posts: 4,058 |
Awwww now I am all squishy! So sweet. Laura :p
Clark: “If we can be born in an instant, and die in an instant, why can’t we fall in love in an instant?”
Caroline's "Stardust"
|
|
|
Joined: Apr 2008
Posts: 377
Beat Reporter
|
Beat Reporter
Joined: Apr 2008
Posts: 377 |
wow. i love the way you write their emotions and expressions into actions, just lovely!
|
|
|
Joined: Apr 2007
Posts: 9,066 Likes: 31
Boards Chief Administrator Nobel Peace Prize Winner
|
Boards Chief Administrator Nobel Peace Prize Winner
Joined: Apr 2007
Posts: 9,066 Likes: 31 |
An acute, powerful yearning for her own mother erupted in Lois. For what they’d had, for what they should have had. The dam ruptured.
When Martha arrived ten minutes later, Lois was still crumpled in the phone booth, clutching a fistful of soaking tissues. Awwwwww “You know I’m going to tell him I love him?” Lois warned. Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww He heard footsteps. Featherweight footsteps.
Lo –
Don’t go there, Kent. Do *not* go there.
The door opened.
Clark stared, his mind scrambled. Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww They so carefully tiptoeing around each other, each afraid the other would bolt when both just want to hug the other and never let go Michael
|
|
|
Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 3,147 Likes: 3
Pulitzer
|
Pulitzer
Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 3,147 Likes: 3 |
Wow.
That's about like I hoped it would be. Lois laid it all on the line and opened her heart to Clark and asked him to forgive her. Clark opened his heart to her, forgave her, and asked her to forgive him.
Then they kissed and air-danced. Didn't know that Lois had super-powers. Of course, she didn't know it either.
Beautiful. Nice finish, please?
Life isn't a support system for writing. It's the other way around.
- Stephen King, from On Writing
|
|
|
Joined: Jul 2008
Posts: 581
Columnist
|
Columnist
Joined: Jul 2008
Posts: 581 |
They have come so far...it's going to make their relationship so much stronger in the future.
This part was great, and it was such a relief after the drama of the last few parts.
This story has been so well done - I'm looking forward to the next part, and I'm glad to hear there's another story coming!
Amber
|
|
|
Joined: Dec 2008
Posts: 2,181 Likes: 29
Kerth
|
OP
Kerth
Joined: Dec 2008
Posts: 2,181 Likes: 29 |
Laura - squishy? Nice word. Thanks for the FDK. Sarah - Thanks for all your FDK. I'm glad you enjoyed this part. Michael - Thanks for your extensive FDK. Wonder about what you have in store for part 9. In all honesty, I think the fic is stronger if it ends here - leaving the reader wanting more and all that ... However, we had five parts of pain and I wanted to tip the balance of the story a little more towards happier things, so we get Part 9. But, if you're looking for plot development or anything too deep ... As for Stories 4,5 and 6 - the muse has just slipped into 2nd gear for #4 Terry - Lois has always had one super-power - the ability to greatly affect Clark! Thanks for reading along and posting such great FDK. Amber - I think it will make their relationship stronger. Thanks for all your FDK. This part was always meant to be the calm after the storm - glad you enjoyed it. Final part - possibly Fri morning. Corrina.
|
|
|
Joined: Apr 2007
Posts: 9,066 Likes: 31
Boards Chief Administrator Nobel Peace Prize Winner
|
Boards Chief Administrator Nobel Peace Prize Winner
Joined: Apr 2007
Posts: 9,066 Likes: 31 |
Originally posted by Female Hawk: But, if you're looking for plot development or anything too deep ... Nah... Waffy fluff is nice, too Michael
|
|
|
Joined: May 2006
Posts: 483 Likes: 6
Beat Reporter
|
Beat Reporter
Joined: May 2006
Posts: 483 Likes: 6 |
That was soo sweet!
It was very brave of Lois to go to Smallville to face Clark.
I'm so glad that they forgave each other.
Kathryn
|
|
|
|