Lois & Clark Forums Forums Fan Fiction Lois & Clark Fanfic Flying Easy (2/2)

Once more I need to thank Happy Girl and IolantheAlias for betaing this story. I also have a special thanks to Lynn for help with quotes and question marks. (Punctuation rules drive me crazy.)

Flying Easy

Part 2: Clark

Clark was sitting in his apartment staring at a blank television screen. When he’d gotten home, he’d realized that not only was he was too wound up to sleep, but there was no time. He didn’t feel like music, so he’d sat down to look for an old movie on late night, or more correctly, early morning TV. That had been nearly twenty minutes ago. The television was still off.

After leaving the Daily Planet, Clark had done only a minimal patrol of the city. As usual, there wasn’t much to see at this time of the day. He’d thought that after telling Lois about Luthor, he’d feel relieved and be able to relax. He did feel relieved, but relaxation was nowhere in sight. The earlier part of evening had been difficult enough with the thieves or terrorists or whatever they were. As trying as dealing with the criminals had been, every glance at Lois and Luthor together had been worse. Each time he'd looked at them, and saw them treating each other as a couple, his stomach had twisted into a knot. He tried to convince himself that it was only because he knew that Luthor was a criminal and would undoubtedly hurt Lois. While he was certain that was true, he knew in his heart that there was something more. He wanted Lois to be with him, not anyone else. His own jealously left Clark so confused he couldn’t figure out the right thing to do. He hated being so unsure of his motives.

Whatever else he had been feeling, Clark was relieved now. Lois had believed him as Superman in a way that she’d never been willing to believe … just Clark. Maybe he should have gone to her that way sooner. Then again, was he supposed to go up to her and say, “Your boyfriend is a criminal. I don’t have any proof, but I thought you should know”? Even with Lois being the instigator of the conversation, it hadn’t felt right this evening to say all those things about Luthor without hard evidence. Clark hoped he’d made the right decision in telling her what he did. He just wasn’t sure. He’d concluded long ago that he could never quite think straight around her. At least, not when personal matters were involved.

Personal matters… There had been too many of those discussed tonight. He’d been off-balance from the moment that Lois revealed that she knew he’d grown up on Earth. Her reasoning was sound and he hated lying to her. Her flawless logic made it easy to admit to that part of the truth. He hoped that all the revelations about Luthor would keep her from thinking too much about what he’d said about Superman. Clark didn’t believe he had given away his secret, but Lois was a very capable woman. If she really did get herself untangled from Luthor, Clark knew that he needed to think about sharing his identity – his whole identity – with her. He felt certain that armed with the knowledge that Superman grew up on Earth and had a “normal Joe” identity, Lois would solve the puzzle herself before too long.

When she’d asked about his relationships, he’d almost fallen off the roof. He should have flown away right then. However, he couldn’t pass up the chance to tell Lois that Superman would not be able to have any kind of relationship with her. That part had been useful. It’d also been hard. Superman had just dumped cold water all over one relationship. A moment later he turned around and dumped more on what she thought was her other best option. Finally, when she asked if the man that didn’t wear the suit was involved with anyone, he thought he’d cry. If only she knew. The idea of telling Lois how he felt, even under the guise of talking about another woman she didn’t know, was too tempting.

Clark was startled out of his muse by a knock on his door. He pulled his glasses down and peeked. Lois was standing on his front step looking impatient.

For just an instant, he wondered if he’d given away too much tonight after all. As he stood and walked toward the door, Clark went over the evening again in his mind. He felt certain that even if he had been too forthcoming, it was more likely that Lois was here to talk about Luthor. He had to remember that he wasn’t supposed to know about Lois’s talk with Superman. With that thought firmly in place, he opened the door.

“Lois, what are you doing here at this hour?” He tried his best to sound surprised.

“Hi, Clark. May I come in?” She sounded … distracted.

“Of course,” he offered, motioning her in with his arm. “Can I get you anything?”

“Just some water, please.” Lois went over to Clark’s sofa and sat down in the spot he’d occupied only seconds before.

Clark felt emotional distress coming from his partner. He couldn’t tell if it was simple stress, fatigue, or something else. He glanced at the clock. It was after 5:00 a.m. He brought two glasses of water from his kitchen, set her glass in front of her and eased down onto the other end of his sofa. Lois reached for the water and took a sip. After she swallowed, Lois closed her eyes for a second in a way that convinced Clark that he should have brought coffee, not water. When she finally opened her eyes and looked at him, he made another try at his initial question. “Lois, why are you out and about this time of the morning? Did you get any sleep at all?”

Instead of an answer, he got an accusatory glare. “Why didn’t you tell me about Lex?”

“Lex? Lois, I…”

She seemed to see the excuse coming and cut him off. “Don’t play dumb with me!” Now she sounded angry. “I just came from the Planet where I had an amazing talk with Superman. Among the things I learned was that you know all kinds of bad things about Lex but haven't told me. Would you care to explain yourself?”

Clark was simultaneously flustered and relieved. As he’d hoped, Lois had focused on the talk with Luthor. Perhaps his secret was safe.

Before he could reply, Lois noticed the delay in his answer and jumped in. “Don’t even think about offering some kind of flimsy excuse. I want to know why you've stood by and let me get close to someone that you knew was a criminal.”

She finally left him enough of an opening to respond. “I've tried to tell you,” he pleaded. “If you talked with Superman, then you know that there isn’t any hard evidence to implicate Luthor. Even with Superman using his powers to investigate, nothing has turned up. I didn’t feel that I could make those kinds of accusations without proof. I tried my best to do the right thing. I knew I wasn’t doing enough, but whenever I tried to say anything negative about Lu... Lex, you… you wouldn’t listen to me.”

“But you never told me anything,” Lois offered in a less angry voice. “All you ever did was to say that you didn’t trust him. Even tonight outside the Planet tonight, all you said was to be careful. You could have least said something about having information from a secret, unimpeachable source that Lex was connected to criminal activities. That would have gotten my attention.”

“But, Lois…”

She didn’t pay any attention to his attempt to speak. “You could have shared those details you had based on Superman’s first-hand knowledge, and we could have investigated Lex together.” She paused and just stared at him for a minute, but Clark was at a loss for words. Finally, she gave up waiting.

Taking advantage of his proximity, Lois reached out, and touched his arm. “Clark, it would have been so easy.” Her plea reeked of frustration. And she sounded hurt.

She was right. That approach probably would have worked. He could have told her everything and attributed it to a source. Heck, he probably could have attributed at least some of it to Superman. “I’m sorry, Lois. I’ve tried to do the right thing in all this. The whole idea of you dating Luthor has been… I've only wanted what’s best for you.”

“Is that really the only thing you wanted?” she asked.

“What?” he stammered

Lois stood suddenly and walked to the other side of the room. After a second, she turned to face him. “Clark…” She paused as if gathering her thoughts. “Sometimes I’m not as quick as I should be, but when I pay attention I can figure out what is being said based on what a person leaves out. For example, I noticed the sentence you didn’t finish a moment ago. Also, I’ve always noticed the touch of jealousy when I talk about Lex around you. I know you try to hide it, but you haven’t always succeeded.”

Now his mind was spinning. He’d have sworn that Lois never noticed any jealousy when they talked about Luthor.

He was still struggling for what to say when Lois picked it up again. “After my talk with Superman at the Planet just now, I couldn’t help putting some pieces together. What was I supposed to think when Superman will tell me about Lex but not about you?”

How to answer this? She had him pinned and the only way out seemed to be more lies that were almost certain to make things worse. With his mind spinning frantically, all Clark could manage was a weak, “Um…”

“Don’t even bother,” she snapped. “My point is that there were parts of my conversation with Superman that got me thinking. I’ve talked to Superman before, but tonight was different. He was talkative. Very talkative. It wasn’t just about Lex. We talked about his personal life and stuff that he’d never shared before. However, no matter how I asked, he wouldn’t say anything about you.”

“Lois, he’s probably just trying to be a loyal friend,” Clark offered weakly.

Lois leaned back against the far wall and just stared back at him with a look of skepticism. Clark figured that it was a good thing she didn't have heat vision or he would literally be toast by now. She held that stare for almost a minute while Clark began to squirm in his seat.

Finally, he couldn't take it anymore. “Lois, I'm more sorry than you know. I wanted...” There were so many reasons he couldn’t finish that statement. After a moment of silence, he tried to put the ball back in her court. “Please say something.”

“Who is she?” Lois asked in a softer tone. Her voice was very different than before. This was personal.

“She? Lois, who are you talking about?”

“The woman you care about but don't seem to be able to impress.”

As the full meaning of that question hit him, Clark slumped back into the sofa. She knows! Well, if this was to be a showdown, he needed to face her. He owed her that. Clark stood and moved to a position not too far from Lois. As he leaned against the wall, he was surprised how calm he felt. In the past when it felt like Lois or anyone else was getting close to his secret, he'd felt nothing but panic. Now that Lois knew, he felt strangely calm. As for that last question, secret or no secret, that particular question was too dangerous to answer. He straightened up and asked, “What gave me away?” He was amazed at how relaxed the question sounded.

Lois genuinely smiled for the first time tonight. “When you talked about your parents. After you left, I went over what you'd said and I realized how lucky the world is that Superman grew up to be the kind and helping person that he is. I thought about different sets of parents I've known that might raise a child to be like that and immediately thought of Martha and Jonathan. If anyone could have raised Superman, it would be them. Then the light came on. It was them.”

Clark noticed that the smile that had appeared on her face when she talked about his parents had lingered. “You aren't nearly as upset as I thought you'd be,” he observed.

She looked a little surprised. “You mean you've thought about this before? Me finding out about your identity?”

Clark could feel the smile spreading across his face. Clark reached slowly for Lois. She didn’t pull away as he cupped her cheek as gently as he knew how. “I've wanted to tell you for a long time. I've been over this moment in my mind a thousand times. About the only question was whether I'd tell you before you figured it out on your own.” She felt so nice. But he was honestly surprised she’d allowed the gesture. Not wanting to push his luck, he brought back his hand and forced a more relaxed smile onto his face. “I'm still surprised you aren't yelling at me.”

“I did yell at you. It’s just that tonight you gave me something else that seemed more yell-worthy. I guess I'm more upset about you not sharing your information about Lex than I am about you keeping your … other job … a secret.”

There was a longish silence before Clark's curiosity got the better of him. “So where do we go from here?”

Lois’s face took on a look of determination. “First you have to give me *everything* you know about Lex. Then I need to put the brakes on that relationship.”

Clark suspected he didn't hide the elation he felt at that moment. “Really?” he asked. “I'd have thought you might try to work an inside angle.”

Lois nodded slightly. “It crossed my mind,” she replied. “However, two things are clear. First, he's very good at manipulating me. He’s managed to keep me in the dark as to his… less savory activities for the better part of a year. Second, based on what you said earlier tonight, he's both dangerous and ruthless.”

Clark was glad he got that message across. “I would have said more earlier, but I didn't want to upset you too much. I think he may be the most dangerous person Superman has ever dealt with. Do you remember the way he shot Max Menken?”

Lois nodded her head.

“I have even less proof for this issue than for some of the others, but I’ve come to believe that was a double cross. I think he set Max up to take the fall and then personally made sure that Menken wouldn't be around to reveal who really pulled the strings. Think about how much money it would have taken to bankroll your dad’s cyborg experiments. Menken didn’t have access to that kind of money, but the trail ended with him. I think Luthor kills without hesitation when it serves his purposes.”

Lois was shaking her head. “Clark... I can't believe you didn't speak up sooner.”

“I wanted to. It was just...” Clark trailed off. This was still so confusing.

She was quiet for several seconds. Clark could practically hear the wheels turning as she factored in what he'd said. “You never answered my question,” Lois reminded him.

“Question?”

“Who is she?”

Clark could feel himself turning red. After a few seconds examining the tops of his shoes, he lifted his gaze to find Lois waiting on him. “I think you know,” he offered.

Her non-reaction confirmed that she knew exactly who the mysterious woman was. Now she started examining her footwear. After a moment, still facing the floor, she started speaking. “You scared me.”

“Lois?”

“When you first arrived, this guy from Smallville seemed too good to be true. Then I got to know you, and it turned out that you were even better than I’d thought. You felt right in so many ways. Then we started getting close and...” She looked up at him. “How much do you remember from when you lost your memory during the Nightfall crises?”

Clark didn’t know where she was going with this. “I remember everything.”

“Do you remember when I called to ask if I could come over that last night before Nightfall was to hit?”

“Yes. My parents were at my place and you said you didn't want to intrude.”

“That was the last time I let myself think of you … like that.” Her face took on an almost mischievous smile. “I think that if your parents hadn’t been there...” Lois started to blush. “Well, I suspect I wouldn't have ended up dating Lex. By the next morning, my defenses were back in place and I'd tagged you as dangerous. That's why I lied later.”

“Now you've completely lost me. When did you lie and what about?” Clark asked.

“Right at the end of Nightfall. I slipped for just a second and then lied to cover it.”

Clark thought he might know what she was referring to, but wanted to be sure. This was Lois’s show so this time he just waited.

“Do you remember when I said I loved you like a brother?”

Clark's heart skipped a beat. “Of course I remember. I'd been thinking we were getting close. Right after that, it was like a chasm opened up between us. You started getting closer to Luthor and whatever we'd had seemed to be gone.”

“Clark, I'm sorry. I was scared.”

Clark didn’t seem to know what to say. Again, he simply waited for her to go on.

She reached out and took his hand in hers. She was looking at it like it was something precious. “During Nightfall I came to realize that how special you had become to me. Think back to how I spoke. When I said I love you... I didn't mean like a brother. I added the ‘like a brother’ after I realized what I’d told you. That was the fear talking. Later, the fear caused me to pretend that my feelings were… not real. I told myself that it was all about being afraid because of Nightfall. I ended up convincing myself that I didn't feel that way about you. Up until tonight, I had myself convinced that I only saw you as a work companion. I'd bet that if you would told me how you felt, I'd have replied that I just didn't feel that way about you.”

While Lois had been talking, Clark had realized that the timing of Lois’s change in attitude was very convenient. Clark suddenly felt an icy fist gripping his heart. He wanted to believe in what Lois was telling him but now he couldn’t shake the doubt he felt.

He was suddenly angry and pulled his hand free. “Now that you know I'm Superman things are different.” Clark tried to keep the accusation out of his voice. He knew he failed.

Lois's face fell. “I guess I deserve that. I know that it probably looks like this is all about discovering … who you are. All I can do is ask you to believe me when I say that it's more complicated than that.” She leaned more heavily against the wall. She suddenly seemed to need the extra support. “Clark, I've figured out that you don't think of yourself as Superman. That was pretty obvious on the rooftop, and once I realized who Superman was, it made perfect sense. If anyone would be uncomfortable with being Superman, it would be Clark Kent.”

Clark struggled to get his emotions back to some semblance of order. He wanted Lois to really love him but her sudden increased interest in Clark Kent seemed awfully convenient for a woman who had been obsessed with Superman. He hated how he was reacting but didn’t seem to be able to help himself. He could feel the frown on his face and it was with a great deal of confusion that he listened while Lois went on.

Lois seemed to take in his expression and her attitude changed. She straightened up and addressed him, her voice now strident. “Listen, Mister, I'm not about to come crawling to you asking you to like me. If that's what you're expecting then I'll just be going home now.” She broke off her tirade, turned and took a step toward the door. Then she stopped, took a second to compose herself, and turned to face him once more. “Clark, I think that there might be a chance for something special between us, but you have to start trusting and believing in me. Are you willing to listen with an open mind or not?”

She was right. Lois was both his friend and his partner. He owed her the benefit of the doubt. Her anger had been just the slap he needed to flush away the sudden anger he’d been feeling. He took half a step toward her then stopped. “I’m sorry Lois,” he said. “I didn’t… I… I don’t know what I mean or what I’m thinking. I want… I want you to like me for me. The real me. It… What you’re saying tonight… it just seems too good to be true.”

Her face softened a tiny bit. “Listen to me. First off, what’s wrong with my liking Superman?”

“He’s not real,” Clark pleaded.

“But he is.” She stepped closer and took both his hands in hers. Now she was smiling up at him. Lois had a really nice smile. “He’s the happy result of Martha and Jonathan Kent raising an extraordinary individual. We’ve spent a lot of time this evening talking about Lex. Assuming that he is the criminal that you say, do you think I’d be more likely to be attracted to him if he had your abilities?”

“No,” Clark answered simply.

“Exactly,” Lois replied. “It’s not about the super powers. It’s about what you do with them. That’s the person that I’ve found so intriguing. I’ll admit that at first it was about how you looked and the powers, but that hasn’t been the point for a long time. You know that. You’ve been there most of the times I’ve talked about why Superman was special. Weren’t you listening?”

Clark thought back to those times when it was her support that kept him going. First, when he’d almost given up during Luthor’s trials. Then it happened again later during the heat wave when he had really planned to leave Metropolis. Lois’s support wasn’t about the powers. She supported Superman as a person. “You’re right,” he admitted. “Now that I think about it, I don’t see how I missed it. You have no idea how much you’ve helped Superman – me – keep going during some of the more difficult times. Somehow I never thought of that when I was wrestling with our relationship.”

Her expression turned a little more serious. “There’s more,” she said. “Tonight after I left the hospital, I kept thinking that I was on the wrong life path. I was figuring out that I didn’t belong in Lex’s world. When I went back to the Planet tonight, I wasn’t thinking about Superman. I was thinking about the partner that I left standing in front of the building.”

Clark was struggling for words. He had trouble enough figuring out their relationship. Here, now, with his hands in hers and her opening her heart, he was ready to believe that Lois felt… After everything she’d said tonight, he realized that he didn’t know for sure how she felt. “So, what do we do now?” he asked simply.

Now she looked as nervous as he felt. “Well, we need a plan to get some real information on Lex. I’m sure that if we work together and you use your … extra talents to help with the investigation, it shouldn’t be too long before we find that hard evidence you’ve been looking for.”

“You know I’ll help any way I can,” he offered. He looked at their clasped hands. “Lois, what about … us?”

Now Lois faltered as she looked at their hands as well. After a second she pulled her hands free and took a half-step back. “With all that's happened...” She stopped. Obviously she hadn’t thought this far ahead either. “Well, whatever happens, you don’t need to worry about your secret. I'm not about to write some kind of story on your secret life. I wouldn't do that to either you or your parents. But... Clark, do you want there to be an us?”

Clark hoped he read Lois's expression correctly. It looked so much like she wanted to give the personal side of their relationship a chance. He took a deep breath. “Yes. I’d like to give it a try and see what happens,” Clark said with all the sincerity he could muster. “I’d like that a lot.”

She smiled the biggest smile he’d seen all evening. “Me too,” she said, blushing slightly.

Clark didn't think he'd ever felt so good. He was basking in the feeling when Lois's eyes widened. “Clark, you're floating!”

Clark looked down and realized he was a few inches off the floor. He willed himself down and then looked back at Lois. “You've always had that effect on me. Do you remember the night at Luthor's ball? The night I cut in when you were dancing with … him?”

Lois nodded slowly.

“When you first came in... You were so beautiful. I was six inches off the ground before I knew what hit me.”

Lois looked surprised for only a second. “I can't see how you managed to keep your abilities secret all this time if you start floating every time you see an attractive woman.”

“That’s easy. I don’t. No one else has ever caused me to lose control the way you do. Every time...” He had to stop. This was getting too embarrassing.

Lois stepped over and took his hand. “What?” she asked. When she used that voice, he didn't think he could refuse her anything.

He felt like he’d said too much already. Then again, at this point… “Every time I think of you and... well, imagine what might be, I have trouble staying on the ground. That’s never happened with anyone else.”

Lois just looked up at him for a long moment. Then she stepped into him and before he knew it he was in a very pleasant hug. “Clark, you know better than anyone that I haven't had much luck in this sort of thing.” Even now, she still sounded so scared. “I keep picking the wrong men.”

He did know that. How someone as perceptive as Lois kept making those kinds of mistakes had always confused him. Tonight she'd provided a clue. She didn't let men that could hurt her get too close. That's why she pulled away from him as Clark and gravitated to Luthor and Superman. In her mind they were safer.

Lois felt so good in his arms. Her heart was drowning out the rest of the world. Clark took advantage of the nearness to risk a light kiss on the top of her head. “I don't know if we'll work,” he offered. “But I promise that I'll never deliberately do anything to hurt you.”

He felt a small shiver run through her. “If this doesn't work, I'll have lost my work partner … and my best friend.”

He could hear it in her voice. She really was afraid. But then, so was he. “I'm scared too. I've always been scared of what it would mean if you didn't like me for who I am. Then I was afraid that you might want to be with someone else. I finally decided that my worst fear was that I would be too scared to tell you how I felt. I believe in us. I believe we can be great together.”

She wasn't looking up at him. She had her head turned and her right cheek was pressed against his chest. After a second he felt her arms squeeze a little harder. “I want to believe. For now, can you believe enough for both of us?”

“I can,” he replied, trying to pour all his feelings into those two simple words. Clark closed his eyes and held her. The warmth of her embrace filled him. He would have sworn they were both glowing. Clark just relaxed and basked in the wonder that was this moment.

After a minute or so he heard Lois's voice. “Clark?” Her tone suggested that he was no longer just her work partner.

“Hmm?” He was afraid words might spoil the moment.

“Open your eyes,” she said softly. He definitely liked that tone.

As he opened his eyes to look down at her, he found that looking down was also looking up. They were floating near the center of his living room with their feet ever so softly brushing the ceiling. Since Lois didn't seem to mind, he just relaxed and gazed at the most beautiful woman in the world. After a second, he realized she was probably waiting for an answer. “See? This is what you've always done to me.”

Lois’s lips were tantalizingly close. Before he know what happened he felt her lips gently brushing his. A minute ago, when Lois hugged him, Clark thought that was as good as he could feel. Now he knew better. In that instant, there was only Lois. Her taste… Her body pressed against him… The feel of her lips… The sound of her moving against his body… Her heartbeat… Even the way she smelled. Clark had never known anything like this. It was… perfection. The kiss seemed to go on forever but by some shared signal that he didn’t understand, they both pulled back. As he looked at her face he knew she’d felt what he did. There were no words for what he was feeling. She was truly perfect.

After a few seconds looking at that perfect face, instead of words he heard a contented sigh as Lois settled against him once more. He couldn't be certain of what the future would hold, but for now they'd found their place. Right here, right now, neither time, nor space, nor gravity had any hold on two people at the cusp of love.

The End