The other Clark comes back into the newsroom a few hours later as Superman. He’s a mystery to the people in this world—they haven’t seen the connection to the flawed Clark Kent like they have in mine, and I envy his elusiveness. He strides into the room confidently and heads over to Lois. I see the look of admiration in her eyes and it hits me in the gut. It’s so strange to know I am also Superman, yet not her Clark—and yet know that *he* will end up winning her in the end. Why did I get the short end of this deal?
Lois takes his hand and pulls him into the conference room. I’d give anything to have my superhearing back to hear what they’re saying. I can imagine though… Lois wants to know what went on at EPRAD. And if they asked him what I think they asked, she’ll be there to bolster his will to get the job done. What must it be like to have an admiring Lois Lane on your side? Though, given our talk on the elevator earlier, I know this Clark has his own issues with his ultra-ego. I’ve seen how Lois ignores Clark, although there are signs that she likes him somewhat at this point. I can’t help but wonder what it takes for Lois to finally see through the brightly colored spandex to the man underneath.
They emerge a short time later. He crosses his arms to appear strong, yet I can see a vulnerability there – he’s terrified someone will recognize him as Clark. But his nervousness is allayed by Lois’ confidence in him.
She announces that he has been asked to stop the asteroid, as I had guessed. Her confidence in him suddenly makes me understand something – it’s not just Lois Lane that I lack in my life, it’s her belief in Superman. That’s how he holds himself together – he needs that confidence she instills in him to do what he does. And I—well, the memory of Lois Lane gets me through the day, but I wonder how much more super I could become if I had her by my side.
Lois brushes past me to go with Superman to EPRAD. I catch a whiff of her soft perfume, and as they leave through the large window, I feel a heaviness in my heart. I wonder if I can ever become the hero I am supposed to be if I am doomed to walk my path alone.
But at the moment, I am worse than alone because I am between worlds. Lois will come back to the Planet in a few hours and I can play her work partner and experience how wonderful it is to be her Clark Kent. I sigh and shake my head, wondering again how I got here and why… I can sense that this isn’t forever—and I could never steal the other Clark’s life. It’s not in my nature to even try. But I feel like there is a larger lesson in all of this, just out of reach.
*~\S/~*
I watch Superman’s send-off on television, alongside some other Planet employees. It’s a strange sensation. I feel like a voyeur on my own life. It should be me in the Suit. It should be me getting ready to save the world. It should be me---
My heart stops with painful longing at the image before me. I see Lois Lane kiss Superman. I feel the blood drain from my face and I become a bit dizzy. There is passion evident in both of them, and it’s as if a ghost of myself feels that kiss as well. <<Where is my Lois?>> I ask myself and God for the hundredth time. My soul yearns for that connection, a thread that I feel is so real and tenable, and yet I know is severed forever. My Lois is gone…
I force my eyes back to the television screen. The camera pans the crowd and comes to rest on Lois who is radiant with love as she waves to Superman. I fight it, yet I feel she is waving to me as well, encouraging me onward.
The camera moves to the sky, but Superman is already gone. I imagine what he must be going through and I wish him good luck. If it’s not me up there, at least it’s him.
I know he’ll get the job done.
*~\S/~*
Perry comes to my desk a few minutes later.
“Clark, I need you out on the street, getting the reaction to Superman’s mission. Lois will be back shortly to write up the main piece, but you could do a tie-in.”
He pats me gently on the shoulder, and I remember back to the days when my Perry had all the confidence in the world in me. But I have disappointed him countless times due to my moodiness—it’s nice to see a Perry who believes in me again, even if it’s not really me he counts on.
I grab a notebook and a pencil, feeling like doing this old school. I could bring a tape recorder, but maybe having to work just a bit harder to get the details will do me some good.
I down the rest of my coffee and head out of the newsroom.
As I step out onto the busy Metropolis street, I see small crowds of people gathered around several TV store windows, watching the coverage on Superman. I tap one woman on the shoulder.
“Excuse me, I’m Clark Kent, Daily Planet. We’re covering reaction to the asteroid and Superman’s mission. Any thoughts?”
She blinks a couple of times, surprised I want her opinion, I suppose. “Well, now that Superman has been sent to destroy it, I know we’ll be all right.”
“How do you know?” I ask, touched by the confidence she has in Superman.
“Because—he’s Superman,” she says simply with a matter-of-fact shrug. “He won’t let us down.”
She turns away and I say ‘thank you.’
I head around the corner and peer into a bar. A bunch of men in work suits are having a beer and also watching the coverage. I step inside and introduce myself.
“Even with his super abilities, the man has courage. I mean, to face an asteroid?” one guy says.
“You know, he saved my kid once. I’ll never forget it. It was the week of Christmas, and our building had a fire. He didn’t think twice and swooped up to our seventh story apartment and rescued Joshua.” The man looks up to me with tears in his eyes. “And now he’s out there to save us all again.”
“He’s real approachable, too. He spoke at my wife’s charity luncheon—didn’t ask for a dime. Great guy, that Superman.”
“I feel safer knowing Superman is around. Metropolis used to be a dangerous city. But now—I don’t worry so much.”
Through story after story, I learn what Superman means to these people. I see a side of the city that I never get to experience in my own world. I know that people respect what I do, but I wonder if there are similar stories in my world. Have I been able to make a difference just as he has? I hope so.
I head back to the Planet, my heart lighter. I feel a connection to the city that I had been lacking before. Superman can be appreciated—and I feel hope for myself as well. Even with my secret out, if I start *acting* super, surely I can build the trust and confidence these people feel for their hero.
As I enter the elevator and push the button, I push a little too hard and crack the plastic. I pause—have my powers returned? I try the x-ray vision and get nothing… no freeze breath… but my strength is returning… it’s a good sign.
*~\S/~*
When I get back, Lois is in the newsroom, still glowing. I can see she’s had the best of both worlds today – a headline story and a kiss from Superman. I smile, despite myself. She is so beautiful when she is happy.
She says hello to me, and immediately gets to writing up her story about the asteroid. I tell her I’m doing a tie-in piece, but she’s not really interested. I sigh, resigned to being the overlooked Clark Kent, and begin work on my own piece.
The television is still on in the newsroom, so we all can keep an eye on Superman’s progress. I see Lois glancing up at it constantly, a look of worry on her face.
Suddenly, the workers in the newsroom gather around the television again.
“Superman is approaching the asteroid,” the announcer says. “Impact in five, four, three, two—he has hit it!---Wait a moment—EPRAD has lost communication with Superman!”
Lois steps forward. “His mic went out. That’s all. Superman is fine,” she says confidently. Then, in a quieter voice, “He has to be.”
I reach to gently squeeze her shoulder, and she gives me a weak smile.
“I’m sure he’ll be fine,” I say.
We continue to stare at the screen. I have been in space only once. I am certain Clark is all right, though there is a palpable sense of worry in the room. I wish I could fly at that moment and try to help him myself. I’m not used to sitting on this side of the action.
Lois suddenly looks up at me. “You really think he’s okay, Clark?” she asks, concerned. Her eyes are wide like a frightened child, and I want nothing more than to gather her in my arms.
But I comfort her with words instead. I think of what the people on the street had said about Superman earlier, and I draw on that confidence. “He’s Superman, Lois. He’ll be fine.”
She suddenly wraps her arms around me, gifting me with a hug. I hold her close, wanting more than ever to return her hero to her.
“Thanks, Clark.”
Before we turn away from the TV, the announcer continues. “We have confirmation that Superman has hit the asteroid, but a sizeable piece is still headed to Earth. Mission Control at EPRAD is doing all they can to reestablish contact with Superman… If he didn’t make it, the authorities will have to look into other options to deal with the Nightfall asteroid.”
*~\S/~*
Lois gets a phone call about an hour later. She looks annoyed as she hangs up the phone. “Clark, come with me, will you? Henderson says there’s something down at the police station that I got to see.”
I nod and grab my coat as I follow her to the elevator.
She fidgets as we ride down together. “Is everything okay, Lois?” I ask.
She shrugs and turns to me. She looks like she’s trying to summon a retort, but tears fill her eyes instead and she laughs
self-deprecatingly. “I’m fine, Clark… just—the end of the world could be approaching! Superman is missing—it should be a great news day,” she says bitterly.
I reach for her hand and squeeze it, not daring to try and hug her again. She smiles up at me through her tears, and I can see a bit of her inner strength. I know she’ll make it through this. And I’ll do all I can to help her.
We ride in silence to the police station. People are already starting to panic, as lines grow outside grocery stores. As I stare out the window, I keep trying my special vision, as I feel like my powers are trying to return. In the back of my mind, I keep thinking that this world needs a Superman, and with the other Clark missing—I might be their best shot. I have a little success with the x-ray and telescope vision. I can’t see through everything, but it’s becoming easier. I feel a bit like I did when I was a teenager, just learning to adjust to my abilities. I suddenly have the itch to try to fly, but I can’t leave the car. I glance over at Lois and realize she’s still a bit shaken up.
“I really don’t want to think this is the end,” she says in a low voice as we make our way to the police station. “I—I want to believe that Superman is okay and out there somewhere…”
“He is, Lois. I know he is,” I say, including myself in that sentiment, hoping that I will be back to my old self soon.
We enter the building and Henderson comes up to greet us, only he stops when he sees me. He stares at me like I’m a freak and I suddenly wonder if he has a sixth sense about things being out of place.
“You aren’t going to believe this—“ he says, but Lois jumps ahead of him, seeing the same man I see behind plated glass.
The other Clark is looking around the room as if he hasn’t a clue about what’s going on. Lois turns to me and looks back at the other Clark, utterly perplexed. I feel my palms begin to sweat as my mind races to give her a plausible explanation.
“Do you want to tell me what’s going on here?” asks Henderson.
“We’re—twins,” I say, though Henderson doesn’t look convinced.
“Well, I don’t know what’s going on, but the guy in there has amnesia. He can’t remember a thing about who he is or why he was found wandering in Suicide Slum,” Henderson says, looking at me as if I could provide the answer.
Lois at last finds her voice. “I want to talk to him. And to you,” she says turning at me. “Alone,” she says to Henderson.
He lifts his hands in a gesture of surrender and ushers us into the room.
Clark stares at me a moment. “Do I have a twin?” he asks. His eyes settle on Lois, “Who are you?”
“I’m Lois Lane,” she answers evenly. She then turns to me, her arms crossed in determination. “I want an explanation, and it better be good. Which one of you is the real Clark Kent?”
“Lois… sit down,” I suggest, though she isn’t inclined to listen. “I am Clark Kent – and *he* is Clark Kent.”
She looks at me and then at the other Clark, skepticism clearly written on her face.
I sigh and shake my head. “This is really hard to explain—because even I don’t understand how it happened. But I come from a parallel world,” I say, hearing how strange it sounds. I can see Lois isn’t buying it.
“Try that again, please,” she says, her defenses still up.
“Lois, I’m serious.” I know I have to tell the whole truth, or she’ll never understand. I sigh and try another tactic, hoping that the other Clark will forgive me for what I am about to say. I glance at Clark, feeling guilty about what this could mean for them, but I know what will get Lois’ attention. “Lois, he’s Superman,” I begin.
She laughs. “Right, and I’m Wonder Woman.”
“Look, we need Superman right now. There are only a few hours left until Nightfall hits the earth. I am telling you the truth. Clark is Superman – and so am I.”
“You’ve got to be joking! I mean—first of all, I don’t understand why there are two of you and second -- *you* are Superman?”
“Who’s Superman?” the other Clark asks, looking very lost.
“Look, I can prove it,” I say, though I’m suddenly nervous. My powers are still a bit on the fritz, but I am wearing the Suit under my clothes still. I have been dying to try the super spin I saw the other Clark do. I realize it’s all or nothing – this has to work. I *am* Superman and my powers have been returning. Besides, this planet needs me. With the other Clark having memory problems, I will have to do something about that asteroid...
So, with more confidence than I feel, I spin into the Suit.
“Cool costume,” says Clark with an appreciative grin.
I turn to face Lois, who is staring at me in shock. “I don’t know what’s going on here,” she begins. “But how can there be two of you—is one of you Clark and the other Superman?” she asks, suddenly sitting down.
“No, Lois, I know it sounds crazy, but what I told you is the truth. We are both Clark Kent and we are both Superman,” I say, glancing at Clark.
Lois looks over at him as well. “Do you remember anything?” she asks.
He sadly shakes his head. “I can honestly say I haven’t a clue what he’s talking about.”
Lois sighs, turning back to face me. I
admire the courage I see in her eyes as she begins to speak. “Okay, I don’t know what to believe or to think, but if you’re Superman—then can *you* stop the asteroid?”
I wasn’t expecting her to ask that, though it’s been in the back of my mind. Lois suddenly has hope in her eyes that I can help, and I don’t want to disappoint her.
“I think I can—my powers haven’t been 100 percent since I got here, but they are returning.”
“Clark *can’t* be Superman,” she says to herself, and I realize she is confused and even hurt by this admission. She glances up at me, “So –if you come from this parallel universe as you say,” she says, seeming game to try and make sense of all of this. “Then, is there a Lois Lane in your world, too?”
I try to hide the hurt I feel at hearing those words, but I evidently don’t succeed. She puts her hand on my arm and asks with compassion that is nearly my undoing, “What happened to her?”
I sigh, feeling the familiar constriction in my throat when I think of my life without Lois Lane. “She disappeared in the Congo, on a story. About a year before I came to work at the Planet,” I manage to get out.
“You seem as if you know her—or me--- how is that possible?”
I glance at Clark, and I don’t want to give more away. I feel bad that I already told Lois our secret, yet I have to say something. “I met you – in your future.”
“How is that even possible?” she asks, incredulous.
“Lois,” I say, raking my fingers through my hair nervously. “I know it all sounds out of a sci-fi novel, but you actually helped me create Superman in my world… and then you came back—“ my eyes shift unwittingly to Clark, who is watching us, utterly confused.
“For him?” she whispers, and I realize I can’t keep their future from her.
I nod and Clark stares at Lois, trying to understand the implications of our bizarre conversation, I imagine.
Lois sits back in the chair, seemingly overwhelmed.
“I’m sorry if I said too much, Lois. But I had no idea how else I could explain all this,” I say.
She glances up at me, and I can see she’s made a decision about something. “Look, time is ticking. Go to EPRAD. Talk to Mission Control and see what you can do. I’ll take care of---my Clark,” she says, almost apologetically.
I give her a wan smile and then turn to Clark. “I’m sorry, Clark.”
“For what?” he asks.
I look back at Lois. “Promise me when he gets his memory back, that you’ll forgive him for not telling you sooner.”
“As long as we have enough time for him to remember,” she says sadly. She suddenly makes a shooing motion at me as she stands. “Go… The world needs you, Superman.”
That’s all I need to hear…
