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Chapter 5: Surprise
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It was funny, Lois thought several hours later as she gazed at her husband standing several feet away from her in a Kansas field. She would have thought a practice session with Superman would involve huge explosions, enormous weights, and lots of visual effects. She had yet to see any of those things, however, and by this point, she doubted she would at all. What she had seen was so much more interesting, and oh so much more indicative of who Clark really was.
No wonder he was so quiet in person when he stood for ten minutes and practiced listening to things happening several miles away or blocked the sounds out so that all he could hear was the sound of birds chirping nearby. No wonder he was so unassuming when he could pinpoint a twig lying half a mile away and burn a minute hole through it. No wonder he was so sure when he could pearl a bush with a thousand frozen droplets, then melt them in a coruscating rainbow. No wonder he was so prompt when he could flash around the world in less than a minute and stop on a dime.
Practicing his powers, Lois learned, wasn't about the big things at all; it was about the small things.
"I don't need to search for limits," Clark explained without the smallest sign of pride. "I need to limit what I have."
So Lois watched him crush a pebble into intricate shapes...without turning it into gravel. She watched him freeze a stick and then melt the ice...without setting the wood on fire. She watched him blur high into the sky and return instantly to her side...without overstepping his chosen mark. She watched him perform aerial maneuvers...without disturbing the branches around him.
She watched...and she marveled at the amount of control and precision that went into even the smallest of Clark's actions. How could the world accuse him of recklessness and foolhardiness when caution was obviously Superman's byword?
After a while, Lois got into the spirit of the tests Clark posed himself. She didn't want him to be alone in the solitary rite he was performing, so she treated it like a game and gave him her own challenges, daring him with her laugh and good-natured taunts. After his initial surprise and intense concentration--as if he feared that failing her challenge would mean he lost her--he began to smile a bit. When he passed every one of the tests and began to slowly relax, he even teased her back and laughed a couple times at her ever more outrageous attempts to stump him.
Lois tried to hide how honored she felt to be given this look into Clark's personal training. Once, before they were married, she had told him that every time she thought she knew everything about him, he surprised her with something new. That hadn't changed, she knew, and she was certain that it wouldn't ever stop being true.
Who would guess that Superman trained himself in the use of his natural powers? Who would guess that he wasn't so much concerned with using his powers as he was with turning them off? Who would guess that he had nightmares about himself and what he could become?
They were private facts, private moments, and aside from his parents, Lois was the only one who got to see them. It made her love him all the more and stirred a depth of protectiveness she never would have thought herself capable of before. In years past, he hadn't had anyone to turn to, and she knew from experience that that fact had taught him to push his fears down deep inside and try to ignore them. Only now, looking back, did she realize exactly how much Clark kept locked inside himself. His loss when first his spaceship and then the globe had been stolen from him. His terror and grief when she had been engaged to Lex. His confusion and helplessness when both Resplendent Man and an innocent child had possessed his powers. Even his love for her and fear of her reaction to finding out his secret--he had had to hide all that away. But now, of his own free will, he had chosen to share this part of himself with her, and Lois grew even more resolved to force Metropolis to see the error of their ways.
Clark deserved better, and she was bound and determined to see that he got it.
"Okay, don't move," Clark instructed her gently. "I'm going to see if I can stop myself while moving at superspeed in tight corners."
"Okay," Lois agreed, a bit breathless already from all that she had seen him do.
Hearing that quality in her voice, Clark gave her a small, warm smile. And then disappeared.
Lois whirled to look behind her. A delighted grin sprang to her lips when she saw him standing there, just across from where he had been an instant before. He smiled again and repeated the trick several times, each time appearing at a different part of the rough square he had drawn around Lois by melting the layer of snow atop the ground.
"I could almost think you were in two places at the same time!" she exclaimed when he finally stood still for more than a second.
"It's a handy trick," he admitted, a shade of remorse darkening his eyes.
"Good," she proclaimed definitively, refusing to let him blame himself for protecting his secret...and his survival.
Forcibly, she banished the image of him writhing in pain before Kryptonite. It was an image never far from her mind since the mayor's traitorous command the day before.
"I'll be right back," Clark promised abruptly before blurring away.
Lois had only just started to wonder where he could have gone--it hadn't taken him this long to zip around the world!--when he returned with a blanket and picnic basket tucked under an arm. "I thought we could eat a light dinner before going back to Metropolis," he explained self-consciously.
"Good idea." Lois reached out, took the blanket she recognized from their linen closet, and spread it over the grass Clark had uncovered for her. Before she sat down, he raked the blanket with a gaze to warm it. The quiet, enjoyable dinner passed much as had their breakfast. Clark teased her a bit and laughed when she made her own retorts. Much better even than that was the silvery gleam that had returned to his eyes and the way he no longer overtly avoided her touch.
"You know, there's one thing you didn't practice," Lois said conversationally when they had both finished eating.
"What's that?" Clark asked, reclining on an elbow, his eyes half-closed.
"This." Lois reached out and brushed her fingers over his cheek. "Touch. And I think you need to practice it."
His swallow was audible, his gaze now intent on her. "Lois..."
"Give me your hand."
His hand was warm and solid and trembled slightly as she cradled it in both of hers.
"I don't know why you're so afraid of these hands," she whispered, knowing he could hear her even above the gusts of wind. "They're so much more gentle than anything else I've ever encountered." Slowly, she lifted his hand and placed it on her cheek, simulating the movement that had first introduced her to the man he truly was. "I love it when you touch me like this. It makes me feel...cherished and safe and loved. You do it every time--every time we kiss, every time you hold me, every time I need you. Why do you do it, Clark?" She peered at him curiously, almost as eager to hear his answer as she was to reassure him.
Though she was no longer holding his hand to her face, he kept it there anyway, his thumb gently brushing back and forth over her cheek. His eyes never left his hand, as if he meant to protect her from even himself. "I do it because...because I do cherish you and love you and want to protect you. Because you're so beautiful that I just can't stop myself from touching you, from framing that beauty. Because sometimes it seems like a dream that you would love me and if I hold on too tightly, you'll disappear. Because I want to soak in the feel of you for all the times when I couldn't touch you."
"But you *can* touch me now," she told him solemnly. "Any time you want. I'm yours, you know."
"I do know that," he said softly, his hand threading in her hair as he curled his fingers around the back of her head. "I just...can't always believe it."
"Then let me convince you," she murmured, and leaned forward to kiss him.
For an instant, Clark seemed to freeze. Then, with his free arm, he pulled her closer to him and returned the kiss, his hand cradling her head as he always did. His fingers brushed across her cheek, his hand ran along her shoulder and her waist, as if he reassured himself that he really could touch her without hurting her.
That he could love her without destroying her.
When the kiss ended, Lois looked up at him and spread her own fingers along his face, considering him with his words ringing in her ears, framing his own beauty with her hands, cherishing him, loving him, wanting--*needing*--to protect him. "I love you so much, Clark," she stated in a shadow of her normal voice, barely able to get the words out past the depth of emotion rioting within her.
"And I love you," he returned, his own voice so low it sent shivers through her, his statement so easily spoken that it showcased perfectly how natural he considered loving her to be. "But, Lois," he added, "would you promise me something?"
"What?"
His arm pulled her tighter against him--a good sign, Lois decided, since he didn't seem afraid that he would crush her. "If I..." He swallowed hard. "If I ever hurt you again...will you please tell me?"
"I will," she said when she could be sure her voice wouldn't break. "I'm sorry that I hid it this time. I just didn't want you to--"
"It's all right," he assured her. "I just...I can't believe that I...didn't even notice. I hurt you, and I...I didn't *know*."
"Because you didn't hurt me." Lois slipped her arms around his neck to keep him from pulling away. "Yes, you bruised my skin, but I knew that *you*, Clark, did not hurt me personally. The red Kryptonite was responsible, not malice or anger or intent to harm."
He clearly didn't agree, but he smiled at her anyway because that was what he always did. Then he kissed her again, his mouth warm and welcoming and *confident* once more against hers.
When he pulled away, his eyes gleamed with that warm silvery-brown she had loved in two men before discovering they were one and the same, and his lips were quirked in that smile she had seen so often from Clark Kent and frequently sought to draw from Superman. "So," he asked teasingly, "do I pass this test?"
"Of course," she said easily. "How could you not with a great teacher like me?"
"I have no idea," he replied honestly, pulling her to her feet as he stood. "I guess we should get back to Metropolis. I'm supposed to visit the prison with Perry."
Lois furrowed her brow. "Do you know *why* he wants you to go with him?"
Clark frowned. "I thought he needed some support. I can't imagine how painful it must be for him to think his son doesn't love him."
"You'll never have to find out," Lois promised fiercely, the fury at Metropolis stirred from its slumber. Suddenly, as much as she had enjoyed this interlude with Clark, she was impatient to be back at the Daily Planet finishing up the next morning's article. Not that that stopped her from enjoying the flight back.
"Are you really all right?" Clark asked her before they reached the roof of the Daily Planet building. "I mean, you've been so caught up in helping me--and I appreciate that--but...how are *you* doing? You seem...a little preoccupied."
Laughing, Lois kissed his cheek. "I'm flying, Clark. That's enough to preoccupy anyone."
"But last night you seemed a little angry about the green Kryptonite bullet."
Lois gaped at him. "Aren't *you* angry about that?"
He shrugged. "They were scared, Lois."
"That doesn't excuse murder," she retorted. "A lot of criminals who threaten me are scared, but you never let them use that as an excuse."
"Isn't that different?" he asked, shifting her in his arms so that he was embracing her as they floated down toward the distinctive roof below them.
Lois stiffened. "Why? Because you have to protect me and I can't--"
"Because they're breaking the law," he hastily clarified. "And the shooter was given orders by the mayor."
"And since when does the mayor have the right to order anyone's assassination?" Lois demanded, that cold fury welling up within her to take the place of blood in her veins. "You weren't under arrest. You weren't a fugitive. You weren't declared a national threat. You weren't breaking the law. And we weren't under martial law--so what gave her the right to order your death?"
Clark landed them safely and let her feet touch the ground before he answered. "I don't know. But I was dangerous, Lois. They were just trying to protect themselves."
"You can say that all you want," Lois declared in a voice of steel, "but it doesn't make it right. You protect justice for everyone else--why won't you protect it for yourself?"
A stricken look rearranged his features, and his hands tightened on her waist. He opened his mouth, but no words emerged.
"That's all right, Clark," Lois told him gently. "I'll protect it for you. For both of us. Because I need you in my life, and I don't want to have to worry about Kryptonite bullets being issued to every police officer."
"They wouldn't--"
"They've already taken the first step," she interrupted him. "I'm going to make sure they don't take another."
A slight smile curved his lips, erasing the shock she had placed there. "They don't stand a chance, do they?"
Her grin was more satisfied. "No. They don't."
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"Some people believe Superman sacrifices nothing to be the superhero we all know him as, to dedicate his days to performing rescues and stopping crimes. You would think that after Diana Stride's attempt on Superman's life and the subsequent publicizing of Kryptonite this belief would have vanished. Since that time, it has only become more apparent that there are things that can harm Superman, Kryptonite being chief among them, both the red and green varieties--such as the red Kryptonite that temporarily reduced Superman's control of his powers and the green Kryptonite formed into a bullet in yet another attempt on Superman's life.
"Once, the superhero was asked why he chose to be Superman when it made him a target and kept him from having things we all take for granted. He replied that it gave him a purpose and a cause, and that it was his reason for being here.
"Though he has made himself a hero for the whole of the world, Superman has adopted as his motto, 'Truth, justice, and the American way.' The last is a reference not to our specific way of life above all others, but rather to the idealism at the core of our country, an idealism adopted as their own by a large percentage of the world. The idealism that believes tomorrow will be better, the world will improve, the future will be ours--in part because we will stand up next to our fellow man and make it that way.
"Superman has stood up to make the world a better place, to improve tomorrow, and to shape the future. He has made sacrifices that I suspect none of us can fully understand. He daily chooses to be the hero this world needs. And he has countless times saved our lives, our city, and even our world.
"Though he asks for nothing in return for his services, I hardly think a bit of gratitude would be too much to ask for. Certainly a green bullet fired when he wasn't looking--and illegally--isn't what he should have to expect in return for his sacrifices.
"No one should have to live looking over their shoulder. No one should be forced to live waiting for that bullet to be fired while they're in the midst of living out their life. Yet Superman is being asked--being expected--to live his life in exactly that manner. One misstep, the mayor has conveyed to him through her actions, one wrong move, one action she doesn't agree with, and he might find a green Kryptonite bullet in his heart.
"I shouldn't be alone in protesting this policy and demanding an accounting for the mayor's decision.
"Metropolis shouldn't be alone in abhorring this step taken and how close Superman came to being struck down by 'friendly fire.'
"America shouldn't be alone in dealing with the problem and assuring Superman he is welcome and appreciated.
"The entire world should join in to the plea for--to borrow a phrase from someone else--truth, justice, and the American way."
Lois looked over her article twice more, then saved the changes and sent it to Perry for the next evening edition. The editor had already left, after showing her a few of the changes he wanted her to make to the article she had finished just before Clark showed up to spirit her away to Kansas, but she wanted the article to be ready as soon as possible. She would continue her campaign as long as necessary, her fury assured her of that.
Satisfied with her work--though certainly not with the need for the editorials--she shut off her computer and gathered up her coat and satchel. She hoped the visit with Jerry would help Clark a bit; he always seemed to feel better after he was able to help someone else, and he was probably right in assuming that Perry needed some support right now. She had never seen the Chief look so defeated as he had the night before, not even after he had discovered that his golfing buddy, Truman Black, had been a Nazi, or that Bill Church Jr. was in charge of Intergang. A pang of sympathy for her mentor sliced through Lois. He had been through an awful lot the past year; she hoped things would begin looking up for him soon.
"Lois, your phone!"
On the ramp heading toward the elevator, Lois stopped and looked back at Jimmy's cry as he answered the phone for her.
After a moment, Jimmy shrugged and hung up the phone. "Never mind. They hung up."
"It figures," she muttered. "Thanks, Jimmy."
Since Clark had brought her to work, she had left her Jeep at home, so she took a cab to Hyperion Avenue and walked up the street toward home. Just before she reached the steps, Lois felt a hand clamp tightly around her mouth, forestalling her from calling for her husband.
"Don't move, Lane!" a man hissed in her ear. The feel of metal at her throat stilled her hand as it gripped the one over her mouth. "We got a message for your husband, and we're askin' politely for you to deliver it to him."
Lois's eyes widened as terror flooded additional adrenaline through her system. They couldn't mean Superman...could they?
"Tell him not to come after us, or he'll be even sorrier than he is now."
With an inward snort of disgust, Lois shook off her paranoid fancies and bit down hard on the man's hand. Before he could do more than let out a yell as the weapon faltered from its position near her throat, Lois grabbed the man's arm and flipped him over her shoulder.
"Superman, help!" she screamed as loudly as she could.
Unfortunately, she realized belatedly, there was another man behind the first. Lois rushed him before he could use his weapon, grappling for the gun. Things might have gone badly if she lived in any other city, but frankly, Metropolis was Superman's turf. And her...well, Lois hadn't yet figured out why the villains couldn't realize that their chances at remaining out of prison were significantly increased if they stayed away from her.
Of course, she realized with a sinking feeling, Superman was currently in prison himself. And though he was only visiting one of the inmates, it wasn't exactly a quick process to check in and out of the place.
And the man holding the gun was a whole lot stronger than she was.