This idea popped into my head when I tried to write a story around the weirdest, most unusual villain I could think of. Given the nature of the villain I'm using, I'm trying to make this a little humorous.
The Case of The Tickler
By Lois_Lane_Fan
Rated G
Lois and Clark take on one of the most unusual villains they’ve ever come across.
Disclaimer: Lois and Clark and related characters belong to DC Comics and Warner Brothers Studio. The only characters that belong to me are Sarah Carter and a few minor characters.
Rated: G
Chapter 1
“Great shades of Elvis! Lane! Kent! Get in here!” Perry called from his office. He sounded annoyed.
“What is it, chief?” asked Lois.
“Anything wrong?” asked Clark.
“I was just going over the bank robbery story the two of you turned in,” Perry said with a sigh.
“And?” Lois asked.
“And your description of the suspect sounds ridiculous. If I didn’t know better, I’d think I was reading tabloid trash.”
“Several witnesses described her exactly the way we wrote her description in the story,” Clark chimed in.
“Right,” Lois backed him up. “We know it sounds farfetched, but a lot of thing that are real seemed farfetched at first, like Superman. Besides, everyone we talked to was adamant that our description was accurate.”
“What description are you talking about,” Jimmy said as he stuck his head through the door.
“Jimmy?!” Lois yelled as she turned her head to him. “Eavesdropping?”
“Of course not,” Jimmy said indignantly. “I didn’t realize that you and C.K. were in here when I opened the door.”
“Female, late twenties to mid thirties,” Perry read. “Estimated to be about five feet and eight inches tall. Blonde hair and blue eyes.”
“That doesn’t sound so unusual,” Jimmy replied. “I’ve dated a few girls that match that description.”
“Just wait a minute; you haven’t heard the weird part yet,” Lois whispered to him.
“Wearing a black leather outfit with five inch high heel shoes,” Perry continued. “No mask. At the center of her chest, there is an emblem of a red feather. Also, witnesses explained that she carried a small gun in her hand. None of the witnesses questioned could verify the make and model of the gun, but one witness claims that he saw a feather duster sticking out of the end of it.” Perry looked up from the paper. “A feather duster? Sticking out of a gun? I can’t print this. It’s pretty obvious that your witness is a drunk.”
“Well, then take out the part about the feather duster,” Lois replied defensively. “The rest of the description matches up with what every single other witness told us.”
“A red feather emblem across her chest?” Perry said in disbelief.
“So what?” Lois argued. “Superman wears an S across his chest. This bank robber wears a feather across her chest.”
“We had Jimmy research the possible significance behind the red feather,” Clark interjected.
“And?” Perry asked.
“From what I’ve seen,” Jimmy explained, “in some Native American cultures, a red feather symbolizes good fortune. I’m not sure if that’s significant or not, but it’s all I could find. There’s not a whole lot of information on red feathers out there.”
“Uh huh,” Perry replied dismissively. “OK, let’s say she really was wearing what the witnesses described. It’s unusual, but I can accept a bank robber with a weird taste in fashion. What I can’t accept is a feather duster attached to a gun.”
“Maybe she had a lot of dusting to do, and she made up the feather duster-gun as a tool for housework?” Jimmy guessed.
Lois, Clark, and Perry just stared blankly at Jimmy, causing him to become uncomfortable about his joke.
“OK, so maybe not,” Jimmy said as he shrugged his shoulders.
“In all likeliness, if the witness wasn’t drunk, he was confused,” Perry explained. “Being in a bank as it is being robbed is a scary experience. You can’t blame the man if he was seeing things. And that’s all this was.”
“Maybe you’re right,” Clark admitted.
“I’ve got a feeling about this, and my gut is telling me that you’re the one who’s wrong,” Lois disagreed. “I’ve talked to a lot of different witnesses over the years, and I can usually tell who knows what they’re talking about and who’s too rattled to remember all the details. Believe me; the feather duster-gun is legit.”
“Prove it, then.” Perry answered. “The same suspect committed her third bank robbery this week a few hours ago,” Perry replied. “Head down to the Bank of Metropolis on Reeves Street, and get me some proof that there’s a crazy bank robber loose who carries a feather duster as a weapon. If you’re right, it’ll make a great story.”
*****
At the scene of the crime, Lois and Clark interviewed the bank employee who had let the bank robber into the safe. The woman was still a wreck from the ordeal she’d been through. She fidgeted a lot, her voice was hoarse, and she gave a nervous laugh after every answer. She was also sweating bullets. In addition, her clothes were a little disheveled, and both of her shoes were missing.
“My name is Susan Thomas,” the woman said quietly. “I’ve worked here for ten years, and nothing like this has ever happened before. Ha-ha.”
“It’s OK,” Clark said as he rubbed her shoulder. “You’re OK now. Go on.”
“She grabbed me by the throat and told me to give her the code to the bank vault. Hee-hee-hee. At first I refused, but then, she threatened to… to…”
“Go on; go on,” Lois said excitedly.
“She stuck a gun with a feather duster at the end of it up to my face, and she told me she’d tickle me with it if I didn’t tell her what she wanted to know. Ha-ha-ha.”
Lois and Clark turned to each other immediately, both with stunned looks on their faces. Had they really just heard the witness correctly? It seemed that the feather duster-gun was real, but its use seemed so absurd. Could it be that there really was a criminal in Metropolis using tickling as a way to get into bank vaults?
To be continued...
