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Features Writer
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OP
Features Writer
Joined: Jan 2011
Posts: 966 |
Halfway done! Thanks for reading and commenting!
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Top Banana
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Top Banana
Joined: Jun 2010
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SO beautiful! I love how you didn't 'show' us the letter right away, but just fragments from Lois remembering--or trying not to remember it. Are there enough clues yet for her to put it all together?  It's interesting in this story how creepy Superman has become--because now it's revealed through the letter that he would kill Lois if Clark told her the truth?! Did I understand that right? And yet, Lois still pretty much sees him as the hero--or does she? She is starting to wonder... I was almost expecting her to notice something from the kiss---because she has had a Superman kiss at this point, before Nightfall... anyway, can't wait for more! As I've said before, I love your poetical style. You are good at metaphors and reworking images to be fresh, immediate, and meaningful. LOVE THIS STORY! 
Reach for the moon, for even if you fail, you'll still land among the stars... and who knows? Maybe you'll meet Superman along the way. 
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Merriwether
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Merriwether
Joined: Dec 2004
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Wow, I just LOVED this part. So real, poignant. I'm yelling at Lois in my head the whole time. Believe him, read it again! He's telling you his secret right there! I feel so horrible for Clark. His letter was heartbreaking and haunting. So beautiful written.
Jackie
Superman: I hear you've been looking for me.
Lois: All my life.
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Joined: May 2011
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Nobel Peace Prize Winner
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Nobel Peace Prize Winner
Joined: May 2011
Posts: 6,142 Likes: 3 |
<Do you know why I'm up before you almost every day? Do you know why I can't sleep without being able to see you?> Hmmmmm....did Clark profess his love in the letter? I clapped my hands over my ears, hating that his paranoid, beautiful words were trapped in my head, emitting light, casting shadows, going round and round so that I didn't know what to think anymore. Clark had always confused me, but never like this. He had never made me feel as if I didn't know him, as if he were so far beyond me I could never reach him...as if I didn't even deserve to try. Love this. "Perry..." I managed before my voice gave out once again. It was as if Clark's written words had stolen my own voice from me, consigning it to the shredded state his letter had been in before I had unwisely put it back together. I really, really want to see the whole of the letter. Or had I simply never realized just how deep Clark's feelings ran? Had I blinded myself to what he was really feeling and thinking? Had I ignored what I didn't want to face? To quote Tempus: "Duh!" <The man you think is Superman is an imposter.> Finally! Lois must think Clark's completely nuts though. <It's the only power I have left.> Love it. <I can't tell you this, Lois. You have no idea how much I want to, which is why I'm writing this letter.> Hmmmmm...... "It's all right," he said hurriedly. He stood and moved so that his back was to me, hiding his expression from me as he had never been able to hide his heart. "I guess we should...get back to work. Right, partner?" *sigh* The knock at the window forestalled my confession. Clark hunched even deeper in on himself while I looked to the window and saw Superman floating there, tips of skyscrapers brushing the cold-blue sky his otherworldly backdrop. My immediate impulse at seeing him was to smile, but somehow, the expression could not form itself on my face. Anti-Supermanus Interruptus! Jimmy has competition! <The man you think is Superman is watching us--watching me. He's doing all of Luthor's dirty work.> *nods* <He's playing us. He's the jailor in our prison-- > *nods again* I looked between Superman and Clark for a moment, about ready to grab them both and shake them until they started giving me some straight answers. But they wouldn't, I was sure. Once again, I ignored the memory of Clark's haunted message. You probably should, Lois.  "But you said it took a lot out of you," I commented, biting my tongue to keep from letting loose an irritated retort. Why had I never before realized just how...evasive...Superman was? Had he always been this close-mouthed? I had to admit that the lack of a mask, the openness of his persona, the air of integrity that surrounded him--it had made me--it had made *everyone*--think that he had nothing to hide. Were we wrong? Ah, finally, the lightbulbs are starting to turn on for Lois! My vague suspicion melted away. Annnnd they are off again. And Lois has the nerve to call Clark the lunkhead. "I am happy, Ms. Lane." Superman looked away from Clark to meet my gaze. "I was made for a purpose, and I am fulfilling it."
"Made?" I repeated slowly, assaulted by yet another line from the letter. Lights coming back on a bit? I hope. And Superman kissed me.
Another woman might have frozen in astonishment, might have melted away in a burst of vapor, might have gaped up at him foolishly. But not me. I was Lois Lane, and I didn't let any amount of surprise stop me from sliding my arms around his neck and kissing him back. I had dreamed of kissing him before, but this was the first time those dreams had ever transmuted themselves into reality, given substance and form that were, ironically enough, almost dreamlike. Nooooooooooooooooooooo! There must, after all, be something of me in him. Hello giant flaming clue! Thank you SO much for giving us Clark's letter! Love this chapter. But I do kinda hope that Clark kills Anti-Supes once his powers return.
Battle On,
Deadly Chakram
"Being with you is stronger than me alone." ~ Clark Kent
"One little spark of inspiration is at the heart of all creation." ~ Figment the Dragon
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Joined: Apr 2011
Posts: 9,509
Nobel Peace Prize Winner
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Nobel Peace Prize Winner
Joined: Apr 2011
Posts: 9,509 |
Oh, AntiKryptonite, this isn't fair. You are making me cry.  How can Lois be so cruel to Clark? She knows that he loves her. Does Lois really think Clark would be so paranoid in a letter, if he didn't really fear for her safety? How can she discount everything he was not brave enough to tell her? What? People in love -- even if they were tortured -- don't know what they are talking about anymore? “I can't. So I'll destroy this letter. I'd burn it if I still had the ability to do so. Why doesn't he have the 'ability' do burn stuff, Lois? Are you going to start believing that Clark is deluding himself into thinking that he himself was once Superman? Use your brain, woman!! HE ISN'T CRAZY! I wonder, and may not find out, because we don't get his POV, is whether he knew she would glue the pieces back together and read the letter? And he wrote down his thoughts as another clue? Now -- having her give in to a kiss to imposter Superman -- how can he still trust her, when she doesn't trust him?  Tears. Tears. Tears. Can we have another waffy moment like their walk to the grocery store in Part 12? Or something to give us another Clark smile and fill our lives with sunshine for even one moment? This Lois is killing me here with her stubborness and pig-headedness. How can she kiss that Superman so willingly after everything that Clark wrote to her about him?! How? Does she not believe Clark even a little bit? But then again the canon character was engaged to Luthor at one point as well. So, maybe she's good at not seeing the truth about people in front of her eyes. You'd think that would be a hinderance in her chosen profession. You write her too well. 
VirginiaR.
"On the long road, take small steps." -- Jor-el, "The Foundling"
---
"clearly there is a lack of understanding between those two... he speaks Lunkheadanian and she Stubbornanian" -- chelo.
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Kerth
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Kerth
Joined: Dec 2005
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Well done, very well done.
Framework4
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Pulitzer
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Pulitzer
Joined: Apr 2003
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Great chapter. Finally Lois is getting it. Superman the clone needs to be good otherwise it is all over. He seems to love Lois so that is a good thing.
Clark: “If we can be born in an instant, and die in an instant, why can’t we fall in love in an instant?”
Caroline's "Stardust"
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Pulitzer
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Pulitzer
Joined: Feb 2008
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What I found very interesting was how Clark talked directly to "Superman". The questions he asked his impostor were very thought-provoking.
I wonder how much brainwashing Luthor has done on the false Superman, and if Clark's pointed questions will make any kind of a difference.
At least we now know why Clark doesn't dare tell Lois. But he does drop hints. And he has hope.
Beautifully written. I can't wait for more.
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Features Writer
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OP
Features Writer
Joined: Jan 2011
Posts: 966 |
So glad you're enjoying, mozartmaid! I'm also glad the letter fragments worked--I was afraid I'd be lynched if I didn't show the letter right away. And, incidentally, this is actually the first time Lois and Superman have kissed. Nightfall took place after Superman had left Metropolis, and he didn't have support on the ground, so the good-luck kiss never happened. Thanks for the compliment on metaphors; I do love them.  Thanks, jackiek! I'm glad you liked the letter. It was something of a gamble for me. Deadly Chakram, I had to laugh at your Superman Interruptus comment. And Clark kill Superman? I don't know about that one. I'm sorry this is proving so frustrating for you, VirginiaR, but I promise that it does get better. And I'm glad that you made the parallel to her engagement to Luthor since that's where I went for a lot of inspiration on how she would handle a Superman showing up beside Clark. Unfortunately (or fortunately, depending on your viewpoint), Lois is a little too focused to take in the big picture sometimes. Thanks so much for continuing to read and comment! Thank you very much, Framework4--loved your comment! :p Thanks, Laurach. I like that you noted Superman's feelings for Lois. IolantheAlias, glad you liked the interview. That was a complicated conversation, and I'm glad it rang true for you. Thanks for the feedback! Everyone, thank you so much for your encouragement!
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Joined: May 2011
Posts: 6,142 Likes: 3
Nobel Peace Prize Winner
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Nobel Peace Prize Winner
Joined: May 2011
Posts: 6,142 Likes: 3 |
Deadly Chakram, I had to laugh at your Superman Interruptus comment. And Clark kill Superman? I don't know about that one. Well, at least rough up Anti-Supes enough to make the clone break down and die. Glad you enjoyed the Interruptus comment. I amused myself with that one.
Battle On,
Deadly Chakram
"Being with you is stronger than me alone." ~ Clark Kent
"One little spark of inspiration is at the heart of all creation." ~ Figment the Dragon
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Posts: 4,425 Likes: 1
Pulitzer
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Pulitzer
Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 4,425 Likes: 1 |
Wow! You outdid yourself. I think this chapter was the best piece of writing you have yet posted, not just in this story but in any story.
The interleaving parts of the letter with the action increased the suspense even while it gave us tantalizing bits of information. And then to see the letter in its entirety at the end -- It confirmed a lot of my speculations, but what a high price for Clark! As if I hadn't felt sorry for him before...
On the positive side, since I was 'incomputercado' (to coin an ugly but descriptive word) for several days and therefore didn't get to read this part until just now, I can read the next part more or less back-to-back with this one.
Brava!
Joy,
Lynn
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Features Writer
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OP
Features Writer
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Posts: 966 |
Thank you, Lynn! Glad you liked the way the letter was woven in--it was a lot of fun to do! And welcome back!
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Merriwether
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Merriwether
Joined: Nov 2010
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What a powerful chapter. I love the way you revealed details of the letter a little at a time.
Joan
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Features Writer
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OP
Features Writer
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Thanks, Joan! The letter was complicated, but I'm glad it turned out well.
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Joined: Apr 2007
Posts: 9,066 Likes: 31
Boards Chief Administrator Nobel Peace Prize Winner
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Boards Chief Administrator Nobel Peace Prize Winner
Joined: Apr 2007
Posts: 9,066 Likes: 31 |
It was empty and neatly made. I didn't hear any sign of Clark.
<Do you know why I'm up before you almost every day? Do you know why I can't sleep without being able to see you?> Oh, so we get it piecemeal? Wishing I could simply stop thinking--wishing I had never read that letter--I quickly washed and dressed. Wonder what/how much he had really written? he hadn't shaved again. What so scared him about that simple act? Is it psychological? Or is he trying to hide? I dared not look toward the wastebasket where I had rearranged strips of torn, handwriting-covered paper over the top to hide that I had stolen his secrets from him. I did wonder. "Everything's fine," I assured him hastily, tasting the bitterness of the lie. It's really ominous? How much has Clark spilled? Is it so jumbled up that she wouldn't believe it or is she just wearing her XL-blinders again. "They have to know already that something's wrong--I've only written two articles in the past week. *G* And Bobby must be already on artificial nutrition. <At worst, you'd think I'm crazy--as if I could disprove that one the way I am now! At best, you'd accuse me of-- >
My grip on the phone tightened until it was a physical pain, ripping me from the memory of the words seared into my mind. "I'm scared for him," I whispered into the phone. "He's so different, Perry. Luthor...changed him."  Umpf... Excuse me, I'll... have to ... clean something up there. Hmm... when did I eat *that*... If I was, I was quickly brought back down to earth by the sight of Clark standing in exactly the same place Superman had stood just moments earlier. Only, the glow of the humming water beside him cast shadows across his face rather than giving him an otherworldly air. Did he see them? And I'm sure he looks just like Superman did. It's just, he's got insipid mudbrown eyes, while Superman's are a beautiful brown, all sparkling and lively. How could I know that it didn't involve Kryptonite and a private meeting with a man he no longer believed was Superman? /shakes head/ He wouldn't really be able to hold it. Maybe, if he carried it in a lead box, locked them into a room, and opened it there... “But I'll hope. That's something I *can* do. Besides...it's the only power I have left.” I didn't expect we'd see the entire letter  And I just did a numbers check. You really did an awesome midpoint there So, now comes the attack? Michael
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Joined: Jan 2011
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Features Writer
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OP
Features Writer
Joined: Jan 2011
Posts: 966 |
Thanks for the feedback, Darth Michael. As to the reason Clark didn't shave today, it was because he was beginning to get back his vulnerability but hadn't yet gotten his heat vision. What DOES Bobby Bigmouth do when there are no tips to lead to stories for intrepid reporters. He'll have to start branching out to the police, I guess.  Sorry you didn't enjoy the kiss! And yes, I guess I'm a bit predictable because the attack is next, but I'm glad you've liked it so far!
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Boards Chief Administrator Nobel Peace Prize Winner
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Boards Chief Administrator Nobel Peace Prize Winner
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As to the reason Clark didn't shave today, it was because he was beginning to get back his vulnerability but hadn't yet gotten his heat vision. Huh, this, of course, means, Clark *didn't* get doused with Kryptonite. His trip with Superman was the day before this morning, right? Michael
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Features Writer
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OP
Features Writer
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Umm...heh, no comment.
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