Lois & Clark Forums Forums Fan Fiction Lois & Clark Fanfic FDK: Contractually Bound (1/21)

I'm aiming for about 20 chapters. Perhaps more if my muse kicks into overdrive. I normally wouldn't post a story that I'm not 100% finished with, but I'm in the middle of chapter 16 and my muse needs some feedback based inspiration.

So...thoughts?

Glad to see you're posting! I'm enjoying this story very much! Hope you get the inspiration you need.

Thanks hun! I'm really loving the feedback that you are sending on the beta'd chapters. It's helping to inspire me a lot. It was just time that I threw some of the earlier chapters out to the masses.

I see Kal-El's life and personality on Krypton is much different than that of his on earth. This is probably due to being raised as a prince with his birth family, instead of a serf like the Kents. I like that you made Jai (Jimmy) is half-brother and that Kal wasn't 'contractually bound' to Zara in this story. (phew!) At first I was worried one of the brothers would end up being Nor.

The fight scenario between the three brothers makes me wonder how stable the ruling class is in your story. Is there an anticipation of attack or an uprising? Or are they just bored upperclass youth with nothing else to do but beat each other up?

I take it that Zara and Ching's marriage hasn't happened yet. Strange that a second son is married off before the heir apparent has sired a heir, but I don't know the full structure of this society as of yet.

Again, your descriptions are beautiful and detailed in a way that makes me envious. When Kal walked into Jor-El's study it wasn't a blank room but one fully realized by the reader. Well done.

So far Kal seems like an arrogent, full-of-himself and his (non-super) abilities, spoiled brat. True, this wasn't the future he wanted, but as to how this has curtailed his aspirations (whatever they might be) for his future are still vague. Kal clearly doesn't seem too interested in the fair sex (at least taken any opportunities with the concubines) nor fallen in love elsewhere, hence the spoiled brat remark. (I don't know how much contact the two sexes have with one another in this society.) Kal has yet to express any interest in a career (if that is possible for royality), a vocation, or hobby (except besting his brothers at any chance given) since leaving the military. Sorry, I'm not feeling overly sympathtic for Kal and his plight, yet. The Kal-El we know and love, would have willingly given up his marital life for the chance to save millions of people dying in a plague and a beloved elder brother, even if said arrangement was not one of his making or liking and wouldn't have been so pouty and pissy about it. (Actually, didn't Clark do this by agreeing to leave Lois and marry Zara?)

I'm assuming Kal's personality will change during the course of this story so that he's more like the CK that we love. Or is this a reverse "Taming of the Shrew" where Lois is the one forced to tame the shrewish Kal? (oooh, that could be fun twist. )

I look forward to Kal's meeting (marriage) to Lois.

Oooh! Virginia is here!

Actually, his is quite similar to our Clark. He just hasn't had much of an opportunity to show it just yet. I promise, he's not a spoiled brat!

Thank you. And God no, no blood relation to Nor, though he will be involved in the story. (Actually never crossed my mind to make Nor Kal's brother since Female Hawk did that in her story.) I loved the idea of making Jimmy Clark's little brother (and by little I mean about six months younger or so), since they have a very brotherly sort of relationship on Earth.

It's a very stable society, just three young men bored to tears and mock fighting as a way to blow off steam/stay in shape/have some fun.

Zara and Ching's marriage has already happened, as you will see in the coming chapters, but no, they haven't produced an heir yet.

Thank you!

Just blindsided, is all.

There is contact, but no one has struck his fancy. That will come up too.

He'll explain his ambitions/career goals later on. But it basically involves him knowing that once Ching becomes Supreme Lord (and inevitablity, seeing as Jor-El will one day die), that he will be his brother's right hand in running the planet. But you'll hear it all straight from Kal's lips in a couple of chapters.

True, but he's only pissy because the marriage was kept a secret and now he's only got two weeks to come to terms with his entire life being thrown into turmoil.

Now that really would be something! Kal needing to be tamed while Lois is the level headed one! But you'll get a lot more of Kal's personality soon.

Chapter 3!

But...well...being married to Lois won't be pretty...at least, in the beginning.

Great start! You've captured my interest with this storyline. I'm looking forward to Kal meeting his betrothed.

Sweet Puppy Lyne instead of Mad Dog Lane? That is a change!

I think Kal won't be disappointed when he meets his future wife, but after the marriage all bets are off and we will have to see how they cope with the situation.

You can already post chapter 2.

Andreia

I only started reading and I'm hooked! I love anything that is set on Krypton.

Keep going!

Thank you! Umm...Lois isn't quite a Sweet Puppy...no matter *what* universe she shows up in.

I plan on posting about once a week, until I finish the last few chapters. I may pick up the pace after that.

Thanks, Morgana! It was fun to write one on Krypton.

Once a week?! Is this some new fangled Kryptonian torture or what?

Once a week?! Is this some new fangled Kryptonian torture or what?

Just ensuring that my muse has enough time to bang out the last few chapters, that's all.

Great start! Things are different on Krypton. Are we on Old Krypton, or New Krypton? Does that make a difference in this fic?

I was def. scared to read this at first because I don't like Kal being married to Zara, but my curiosity was peaked, and I'm very glad it was!

With the differences in Kal's, I'm kind of excited to see what Lois' personality is going to be like.

Old Krypton. It never exploded. Doesn't make *too* much of a difference though, I guess.

Thanks!

I don't like Kal being married to Zara either. About as much as I hate Lois and Lex together, to be honest.

I'm glad that you decided to take a chance on this fic regardless. Kal isn't all that different from our Clark, as you will hopefully see in the rest of the fic.

Thanks for stopping in!

Haha yea... we should totally set Lex and Zara up. His ego could use the super downsizing of a super woman

Can't wait to read more of this!

That would be awesome!

That would be awesome! </strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif">lol Do they have male concubines on New Krypton?

Yay! You finally posted this! After your preview in your interview... I was becoming anxious for another long story! Glad to see this up! I read it on my phone at two am last night when my car broke down in the middle of a *very* bad neighborhood in Sacramento on my drive home from school... :rolleyes: So your story was a nice break from an otherwise scary and terrible night. /sighs/

Couple of points I enjoyed (while running on my limited brain power from little sleep):
Phew. I was really concerned for a minute there. And I kind of expected it to be Nor.
Ching! Perfect! If Kal were to have a brother, I think that'd be great. That eliminates the Zara issue too, right?
Didn't connect this to Jimmy until reading other comments. Great!
Aha! Hahahaha!!! Oh, my! That's just great! I can totally see Jimmy doing and saying just that! Brava!
Lyne? Like Lane? And like the use of the red fever.
/chokes on water/ "Him?!" ( JK. Kind of saw that coming with the little sneak peek you gave me.)
It will be one if he doesn't straighten out soon. She'll knock some sense into him.
Quick turn around time. Shotgun wedding, anybody?

Really liked this story- can't wait for more!

Nah. Too archaic and patriarical of a society. Only the men get to sleep around.