Oh, man, so many emotions in this story! I so wish that Clark knew all those things he was thinking about himself were so terribly wrong -- I about came off of my chair to shake him when he thought he was a coward and no better than Claude or Luthor, and couldn't help but snort when he thought that Scardino was the better man. I can't believe (okay, actually, yes, I can, because this is Clark we're talking about, but still...) that he thinks Scardino will be better for Lois -- I mean, come on, if he can love her for her flaws, then shouldn't she be able to love Clark enough to take the constant leaving long enough to give him a chance after finally agreeing to go on a date with him? But as said, this is Clark, and so he knows that she deserves so much better than him.
Oooh! AntiK is here!
Thanks so much, my friend! I did warn you that it was a bit of an angsty piece.
Poor Clark is really being mentally tormented here. He really *is* blind when it comes to himself, isn't he?
Love how you bring out that he can't quite decide if he should tell her his Secret or not -- would it be winning her through his powers or would it be permanently losing her for both sides of himself?
Thank you. I know Clark takes a lot of flack for not telling Lois sooner in the show about himself, but I really do think it was important for her to love him first. For Clark. Without knowing he was also the hero she so often drooled/fawned over.
And wow, I know you warned me that something bad happened to Lois, but this was just so terribly sad and traumatic, and you did such a wonderful job of painting his despair and his bone-deep grief and worry and fear, his long vigil in the waiting room, and then finally his shuddering terror and relief when the doctor comes out to tell him the news. And I LOVE that he thanks the doctor right away, that he thinks of her as wonderful because she managed to save Lois -- as well as him noting the cabdriver's solicitousness as kindness. So indicative of who Clark is, and so much a part of why he's so much better than Claude and Luthor and Scardino!
Thanks. To be honest, I think I had more fun writing this half of the story, with all of Clark's despair, more than I did the second half. It's actually really easy to write for depressed Clark - he does such a great job of showing us his emotions right on screen!
Glad you liked the other little touches too. I couldn't imagine Clark as thinking/doing anything other than what I wrote.
Such a great speech he gave to Lois -- and if the doctor hadn't been able to guess from his blatant reaction to her news that he loved her, she certainly knows now!
And something of a cliff-hanger too? I almost hope that she doesn't yet know that Superman and Clark are one and the same, that she said it because she wanted him to be there for her, and heard him in his shaken voice. But we'll see -- looking forward to a much happier conclusion!
Ah, well, you know me. I'm a sucker for a good cliff-hanger.
(Also, probably too late by now, but I did wonder about something: Clark mentions that he brought the pregnant woman to the same emergency room as Lois, but didn't he make that rescue in New York City? And he mentioned that the pregnant woman was the same height and weight as Lois -- wouldn't a pregnant woman who was, ordinarily, the same body build as Lois, be much heavier at least than Lois?)
Different ER. He's just noting that he's entered through ER doors three times in one night, and the similarities and differences. Slding glass doors being the same at both, his concern levels/reasons why so vastly different. And the woman could have been thinner than Lois (a bit of a stretch since Teri was so thin a puff of wind could have knocked her over) and gained very little through her pregnancy. (Hubby's cousin stayed immensely skinny except for a little "basketball bump" when she was pregnant.)
Some great lines through here:
The distinction between living his life and existing.
His reminder that this is not a perfect world.
How he won't kiss her because he refuses to take advantage when she's -- he thinks -- Scardino's.
Perry being sensitive to the fact that Clark was hopelessly in love with Lois.
And more, but those are the ones I can think of right off hand!
Thank you! You have a knack for pulling out lots of the little touches I've enjoyed adding in.
Missing the HUB reruns on Sundays!!!