A/N: I apologize that I was late on this week's update. Work's had me, well, overworked. I hope to do better next week. Also, you may have noticed the *tentative* chapter number up there. Please keep in mind that that number is, in fact, tentative and liable to change, depending on chapter breakdown (and the bit i've got left to finish :p ). That being said, enjoy this chapter.
*****Madness: Chapter Six*****
"I did learn something while I was down there. People go crazy, not because they are crazy, but because it's the best available option at the time." -- Gabrielle Zevin, All the Things That I've Done"Clark! What was all that about?"
The door to their brownstone slammed shut behind them, and Clark immediately took to pacing back and forth in their living room. He carded a hand through his hair as he thought about his wife's question. She had no idea how loaded a question that was. No idea the amount of turmoil it put him through just to think about all of the things that could go wrong, would go wrong and
were going wrong around him. What was that all about, indeed. What wasn't it about? Someone was after them and his entire life could be splitting apart at the seams. The voice that had delivered the threat had been at the police station. He could have been a criminal, there for processing. Perhaps a lawyer, slimy looking and silver-tongued, helping a criminal escape the charges he was under. Maybe it was a cop even. It could have been a genuine warning that had been delivered over the phone, by a decent and honest officer of the law. Or it even could have been a dirty cop, who had something in store for him the next time he showed up around the precinct. He just didn't know. And he had no way of knowing for sure.
"Clark? Did you hear me? I asked you what happened back there?"
He let out a frustrated groan at his wife. "I don't know, okay? I don't know. I just... I had to get out of there."
Lois scowled and crossed her arms over her chest. Clark knew that look. He knew what would come after that look, too. But he couldn't do anything to stop it. How could he explain himself any further and expect her to understand?
He didn't even understand it all himself! He was being irrational, and he knew it quite well. He didn't need Lois to inform him of that.
"Why wouldn't you just talk to Henderson? He's probably back there conjuring up twenty different worse scenarios that we might be in-- and he wouldn't be hard pressed to come up with some, what with how much we've been through over the years-- and you just left him wondering!"
"I couldn't tell him."
From her face, Clark knew with certain dread that he was about to be raked over the coals. She took in a sharp breath before getting her start. "What's the matter with you?"
"How can I tell him if the person who's threatening us is in his office? He could be best buds with the guy and let it slip that we're onto him, and then--"
"Oh, please! Bill's been our friend for years now!
Yourfriend for years, even! How come you couldn't trust him enough to say you just got a suspicious phonecall? I mean, for Pete's sakes, it wasn't even a threat, it was a warning! You're overreacting to all of this."
"I am not!" Clark barked back at her.
The look Lois gave him made it seem patently obvious what her thoughts on the matter were.
"Okay, maybe I am a little bit," he conceded. He let out a shaky sigh and dropped his head into his hands, shoulders sagging. What
was wrong with him? Lois was right-- as usual. He was overreacting. Henderson was someone he'd considered to be a close friend-- still considered to be one-- and he'd completely shut the man out.
"Did something else happen? How did your appointment with Bernie go today?"
Clark stiffened as he remembered that morning's early appointment. Lois had dropped him off to go in alone after remembering that she was supposed to meet her mother for lunch in town today. And as much as she'd have preferred to skip out on her mother-daughter plans and go to lunch with her husband, she also knew that she'd blown off her mother three times in the past two weeks, and the woman was bound to make her life a nightmare if she blew her off again. Clark had offered to go with her, skipping his appointment altogether, but after a stern look and a reminder that he was already overdue for these tests. So Clark had begrudgingly gone in on his own, only to face more bad news.
"Clark?" She repeated herself. "How was Bernie's today?"
He hesitated. "Dr. Klein?"
Lois rolled her eyes at her husband. "No, the other Bernie that I forgot to introduce you to. Of course, Dr. Klein! Now what happened?"
Clark released a sigh and sank to the couch, looking defeated. "He wants me to start coming in every other day, instead of twice a week. To monitor me, and run some more tests. He's too nervous about upping the dosage of the green kryptonite but he said he wants me on a more rigorous... treatment regimen."
"Oh, honey--"
Clark lent voice to all his fears, finally loosened up a bit after being goaded into talking about it. "I know it's not that big of a deal, but you know how much doctors make me nervous. What if he wanted me to come in and stay in their care? With them constantly testing me and everything else? It's like my dad always told me-- they're going to lock me up and dissect me like a frog."
Lois sat herself down on the couch next to him, taking his hand into hers in a gesture of comfort. She brushed that lock of unruly hair back from his face softly. "Clark, I'm sure that's not the case. Bernie's been friends with us for years now, too. We've trusted him with our secret-- the biggest secret in the world-- and what has he done with that knowledge?"
"Pump me full of kryptonite," Clark muttered under his breath.
Lois gave him a look and Clark immediately shot her back a look of apology. He knew that comment was out of line. "You know that's not true. He hasn't done anything, except try to help us. He wants us to be happy."
Clark nodded in return. "I know, I know that. And at least today was the last of the red stuff. You know how I felt about that. But it's just... It all just puts me on edge, you know?"
Lois nodded, pursing her lips. "I know. Does that mean... you want to take a break from it? All of the experimenting? I mean, we're still young. We don't need to start having kids right now if you don't want--"
"No! Lois," he turned to his wife with panicked eyes. How could he explain, make her understand how he felt about this? "That's not it at all. I do want kids, and I want them as soon as possible, I just... I need to start managing my stress a little bit better. I've just been... so wound up all week, ever since that phone call especially."
Lois leaned in and planted a soft kiss on his lips, effectively silencing him. As she pulled back and locked eyes with him, she saw the heat that was already in them, just from that one simple touch of their lips. She grinned. "Are you so sure that it was the phone call that's had you wound so tight and not the going-without-sex issue? Because if that's the case... then we're going to start having a lot of problems in the near future, aren't we?" She grinned at him impishly.
But she could tell she had lost him the instant she'd brought sex into the equation.
He pulled her in tightly against his chest and together they gave in and broke Bernie's number one rule for the week.
But Lois was never much one for rules anyway.
*****LnC*****
Clark sat there, fidgetting uncontrollably. He went from twiddling his thumbs, to shifting his position on the table anxiously, to looking all about him, eyes not staying in one place for too long. This was awkward, uncomfortable, and he had absolutely no idea what he could do or say to the man that could be walking into the room at any given second. He shouldn't be this nervous, Clark reminded himself. After all, he had been living a double life for the past five years as it was. One more little lie wouldn't hurt anything. Well, it shouldn't hurt anything. It wasn't a big deal, right? The point of all this was so that he and Lois could conceive a child, wasn't it?
The door opened and Dr. Klein walked in, his nose burried in his work, clipboard so close to his face that it was a wonder he could even navigate around his office, let alone through the rest of the building.
Clark shot up off the table rigidly and blurted it out without even thinking. "I slept with Lois last night!"
The doctor practically jumped out of his skin at the sound and his clipboard clattered to the ground. He looked at the source of the voice with wide eyes.
So much for keeping it a secret, Kent. "Cl--Superman?!" Bernie sputtered, noting his dress. "When on earth did you get here? How long have you been sitting there?"
Clark looked down at his outfit and realized that he hadn't changed out of his uniform in all the time he'd been waiting here. He spun quickly into his civilian wear and gave Bernie a sheepish smile. "Only about ten minutes."
Dr. Klein shook his head and bent over to pick up his scattered paperwork. "Clark, sometimes you puzzle me."
Clark looked confused at that. "Why?"
"Let me guess what you're gonna say. You've been going crazy without her, you guys just couldn't help yourselves, and now that you've done it, the guilt has been eating you up inside?"
Clark's face fell, but he still found it in him to be impressed. "Well, yeah. But how did you--"
"Clark, if I expected anything else from you, I would be surprised. But honestly, I didn't. I just thought it might clear up some things between how yours and Lois' bodies function together. But, as it turns out, it might not be as necessary as I thought."
Clark couldn't suppress the shiver that ran down his spine. That sounded foreboding."Why?"
Bernie sighed and took a seat, signalling for Clark to do the same. Clark sank back onto the table slowly.
"Clark," he spoke hesitantly, gathering his thoughts. "I need you to understand that, while I greatly appreciate the research that Dr. Lane did, and the fact that he was able to repeat it is great... but his research... it may have been a little bit... flawed."
Clark felt all the blood drain from his face. "What do you mean, it's flawed?"
"I don't know when or where it happened-- whether it was the first time he did the research and forgot to correct the mistake when he eventually repeated it, or if he had it right before they all got hit with that memory blasting ray and forgot to include it when you and Lois asked him for help again-- but there is a slight error in one of his calculations."
Clark nodded, though he still didn't understand. His heart was beating out of his chest, slowly riling him into a near state of panic. Things couldn't go wrong. Not yet. He was so close to moving forward, so close to moving on to the next stage of the process-- the one where they actually got to run fertility tests on him instead of just figuring out his biological makeup. The stage where he and Lois could actually begin trying to make a baby again. He swallowed and tried to shove these thoughts down to the bottom of his mind. "So, there was an error. You guys caught it. You can fix it, can't you?"
At the wince that crossed Bernie's face, Clark knew what the answer was going to be.
"Here's the thing, Clark--"
"No, no, no. You told us the research was enough-- it wasn't conclusive, of course, but you said you could work with it--"
"And we still can," Bernie emphasized, trying to secure the superhero's attention once more. "But it just means this whole process is going to take a little bit longer. I need you to think logically with me on this one, Clark. One crucial mistake could skew all of Dr. Lane's research, and all of the sudden, we have an entirely different issue. Not only are we going to have to redo some of the tests we've given you, but we're going to have to rerun all of the research done by Sam at the same time, piece by piece. It's a lot more complicated than it sounds."
Clark felt as if his entire world was spinning out of control. His head was swirling and for a moment, he thought he literally might get sick. More testing? He forced himself to take a shuddering, deep breath before speaking to his friend and doctor in a calm and collected manner. "All right. When you say that we're going to have to redo it, what exactly do you mean?"
Dr. Klein looked to his shoes, as though they might give him a better explanation.
"You mean all of it, don't you?"
The doctor brought his gaze up to meet Clark's own, a look of helplessness and apology residing in them. "I'm sorry. But one change in the variable early on can mess with the entire equation later. You understand."
Clark took it all in silently, wondering how things could get any worse, when a point of confusion struck him. "You say there's a change in the variable," he spoke slowly.
Dr. Klein nodded, hesitant to really give a straight answer. "Yes, there is that."
Clark waited for a response that did not immediately come. "And that variable is...?"
Once again, Bernie was at a loss for words. "You... well... remember how when you first came in with that research, what, a little over a week ago? Two? Anyway. In Dr. Lane's research, he stated that the green kryptonite rendered you powerless and, in prolonged exposure, could kill you. He then followed up that statement by stating that the red kryptonite made you lose control over your powers."
"Yeah," Clark nodded, nervously waiting for the man to continue after a long pause.
"Well, from what we've seen from your physical and emotional reactions, and then separately from your biological reactions, I've come to the conclusion that Dr. Lane was quite possibly wrong on that matter."
Clark paled. What was that supposed to mean? Where did that put him?
Bernie seemed to notice the man's thoughts were spiralling out of control and tried to keep him focused. "Remember how... I tested you those first couple of days with different levels and doses of the green kryptonite, to see your reaction? And then I followed up the next few days with the red kryptonite, to see the difference in how they both affected you?"
Clark eyed the doctor warily. "Yeah."
"Well, I'm going to have to do more of that."
"More of what? The dosage testing?" Clark swallowed thickly. He hated that. It had been painful. So very, very painful.
Bernie shook his head slowly. "No," he responded gently. "More of the red."
