Darth Michael: Sorry about the delay, Michael. I still had this one on my to-do list and for some reason thought it was a response to a FDK response. Can I use the excuse of being sick, again? I mean again sick again. I'm hoping to be 100% soon. What a nice change that would be.
Weeeee!
Awww…she wants him to take her on a beach.
CLARK: ‘on’? That’s not grammatically correct.
LOIS: It’s not? /confused/
For a first* time ON a beach probably isn't the best place, unless there's a sand-free hut on said beach. (*Wink, wink, nudge, nudge).
Not with the Planet, only with the planet.
Nobody ever buys her chocolates for her birthday?
Nope. Never. /Sorry, that wasn't the answer you were expecting?/
She thought he wanted to take her on a beach and he wanted to take her to dinner?
No, she thought he wanted a one-night stand earlier in the year, not on her birthday.
CLARK: For the nine-hundredth time, *I* don't do one night stands.
LOIS: One night lie-downs whatever.
Yes. The Flash needs about 5 miles of straight track to get up to the speed of sound. And that guy can deliver a warm pizza in 30 minutes or less from the other side of the continent.
Well, in Strange Visitor (wasn't it?), Clark is able to stop 3 accidents around the Daily Planet bullpen in seconds flat without anyone noticing, so I don't think he needs to build up speed. And in Ordinary People, he flies around the world in seconds (micro seconds) bringing Lois gifts during the course of one of her rambles, so... she's got a point about him being fast enough to break the sound barrier across a room.
So:
LOIS: /kicked Stoke in the crotch, saving herself from the Michael Jackson impersonator himself/
CLARK: /watched and wondered at all the other people who could have been saving if he wasn't obsessed with Lois's safety so much/
Pretty much.
He’d have to start over in another universe, *again*?
Actually, that's KenJ's story. I doubt THIS Clark would be up for the torture of breaking in yet another new Lois.
So, all Lex would have had to do was kill Lois and make Superman watch, or well, send her body to him, to make the dense Kryptonian go away?
LEX: /wallbash/
Technically, that was Luthor's original honeymoon plan, until Revenge addled his brain into being obsessed with Lois and he decided he wanted to keep her alive. (Or was it pure love, one of the two.)
LEX: Oh, no. I didn't, did I? Oh, that's just... kill me. Kill me now.
You've met Lois, right?
I’m not sure she’s a fit wife for a superhero.
It's not as if Superman is a politician.
CLARK: Anyway, she'd be marrying me, not Superman.
LANA: I’ll say. He dumped *me*! And I’m a blonde.
Technically, YOU dumped him, honey.
This time, he’d bring her to her apartment, check under the bed, and then kiss her good night on the cheek before leaving?
LOIS: Wow. Mr. Excitement.
BATS: I’ve now gotten this great new candles. See the lovely green glow?
LOIS: Pretty. Most people don't use candles in the daylight, though.
Confidence issues?
LOIS: It’s been three hours since my last chocolate bar, okay?
No. She's still confident about landing Superman.
LOIS: Or flying him. I'm not picky.
Yea, all she’d have to do is turn on sports, or walk around naked, and he’d not hear a thing she’s saying.
LOIS: /dancing by/ I’ll be out, checking out that new Intergang headquarter in the new Costmart.
CLARK: Yeah. Whatever, Lois. Don't die. You're blocking the screen.
LOIS: Don't you have x-ray vision?
See? Clark’s not planning on having sex with her. He doesn’t need a car. Money means nothing to him. And sports, well, he mainly goes for some obscure team from the heartland.
LOIS: See, not being male is a compliment.
CLARK: Still not seeing that.
“You stuck a knife in my masculinity,” he refuted.
Oooooooohhhhh /thud/
Not literally.
Actually, there’s a lot of debate going on, all the time.
Arguing is kind-of their career description. I mean debating.
“Besides, that knife would end up bent out of shape if I tried. No one is more male than you.”
ER: /shocked that EW went for such a painful visual reference/
Too much? Or was Lois's admission that no one was more Male than Clark too surprising?
Yes, fishing for compliments.
/points at Kathy B’s Camping With Clark/
Fun story.
Umm…I think some chocolate dripped off the s’more there.
See, part of my grammar problem is that I use commas and ellipses (...) to represent pauses in conversation. Fixing... Fixing... Okay, fixed on the Archive version.
That she wants to stuff herself full of s’mores?
That's ever been in doubt?
“Oh, look. Your building. Do you need me to walk you up?” he asked, his voice increasing speed with each word. He pointed over his shoulder. “I need to…”
Dip?
Be one or go for one or both?
At least she's 50% right.
CLARK:
How is being wrong, 50% right?
LOIS: I'm always right.
She’s really roughing it, there, isn’t she?
LOIS: What? It won’t even have a fax machine!
Also, would a fully stocked RV have an air mattress? I always figured, regular mattress, since it’s built in?
Well, the air mattress was originally in a tent, but then I thought an RV was more her camping style. Although, now that I think about it the only air mattress she needs is Clark.
CLARK: Was that an insult?
Only a bit.
Antarctic Expedition Ship: Look out! Some really big iceberg just calved.
The true reason we have global warming.
CLARK:
![[Linked Image]](http://cosgan.de/images/midi/konfus/c085.gif)
Don't look at me. Look at Lois!
Ah, that’s where he went! He’s hoping that Lois is up for a reunion with Rachel.
Um... No. Lois talked about eating hotdogs by a campfire and it reminded of his night with Rachel.
RACHEL: I most certainly did not.
CLARK:
![[Linked Image]](http://cosgan.de/images/midi/frech/e045.gif)
RACHEL: Never mind. I guess we did eat hotdogs. My bad.
![[Linked Image]](http://cosgan.de/images/smilie/frech/e010.gif)
He could put some Kryptonite next to the bed. That way, he might be the one to die after all.
CLARK: Not helpful.
Perhaps that ocean water left him feeling a bit salty.
Lex had sex with a Lois-lookalike right on camera and showed it to you. He later proceeded to brutally murder her. Does that help?
CLARK:
LOIS: No. Not at all.
Maybe if he had said that he forgot that he had a date with Mayson?
He's trying to not lie as much.
I’m not sure this is the best way to phrase things.
You've been reading this story for years now, and you still haven't figured out that this Clark isn't good about phrasing things?
He's good at digging.
How he would like to win with his girlfriend?
CLARK: Yea, that too.
She ran off and joined the army afterwards.
CLARK: I don't blame myself for that.
RACHEL: Well, that makes one of us.
EW: /just joking/
Did he just tell her that he has very high expectations for her? That she really had to bring her A-game to make it worth the 1000 bucks he’s shelling out?
Actually, no, since Lois is desperate enough to do him for free.
LOIS: Thanks. A lot. Wait. What?
![[Linked Image]](http://cosgan.de/images/smilie/boese/e035.gif)
Aww…he’s keeping it for their wedding night, to make it special!
Perhaps.
“I was planning on it,” he retorted, wincing when he realized that he said those words aloud.
ER: /amazed at what Clark just admitted to Lois/
CLARK: What? I said I'd be more honest.
LOIS: He's just rubbing it* in to torture me, isn't he?
*being honest as opposed to other things.
“Come and visit me, and I just might be,” she cooed.
ER: /shocked that Lois would acknowledge the fact that she'd only be able to make love to Clark in her dreams/
She's a smart cookie.
*************
One More Talk
*************
Right.
Do you have a better title for this important conversation?
So, the nonexistent kind?
“Would you have said ‘yes’?” Clark asked.
ER: /having received lock-jaw from too much shock in this part/
Hoping you've recovered.
Is Clark a glutton for punishment or what?
ER: /No, but I am./
So, glad you come to enjoy my ride... roller-coaster ride. Story. You know what I mean.
