Hi Mary!
/looks at title /
Hmmm
/looks at author notes/
Duh!
Okay, perhaps the text will tell us which version of Clark you’re gonna torture this time.
Despite his efforts, though, Clark’s thoughts kept drifting to the strange man living with Cat Grant. “Red Tornado”,
Aaah, so it really is the one with the cougar.
LOIS: /FREEZES/
No, the *other* cougar.
“Red Tornado”, he’d called himself, but that wasn’t really a name any more than “Superman” was.
Actually, Dances-with-Criminals might want to weigh in. And that’s before we get to kryptonian naming practices.
could he be somehow connected to Clark?
Lois won’t like that there’s a Chip Off The Old Clark flying about.
“What are you currently working on?”
“Or ‘who’,” Lois muttered just under her breath.
Nice callback to season one dialogue.
Perry held up a hand. “Hold on a minute. Walter Willoughby? America’s ‘Uncle Walty’? *That* Walter Willoughby?” He gave her a skeptical look.
I just re-watched Beverly Hills Cop 3. /points at Uncle Dave/
Do you *really* think he’s got skeletons in his closet?”
There’s a reason they never found any prostitutes who could talk about their night with The Uncle.
Brenda from international news gave her rendition of Uncle Walty as a mafioso dealing in the popsicle trade. Cat sat quietly in her chair, seemingly focused on rearranging her notes.
Ooooh, very inspired
what she really needed was a good distraction from this whole depressing business…
/imagines Cat tapping Jordan on the shoulder and imitating the sign Anya made to Xander in the Buffy episode “Hush”/
The older woman snorted. “Grant, about half of my mail is noise complaints about this apartment! I need you to start keeping it down!”
No more Bongo drums?
Cat tried to look appropriately contrite. “Sorry. The guy I’m with is deaf, and he can’t tell when he’s being noisy.”
Yes, blame it on the disabled person.
JORDAN: I’m *deaf*.
/places kryptonite in front of him/
JORDAN:
JORDAN: Sorry for collapsing so noisily?
TEMPUS:
HE’S* not the one being too loud,” Mrs. Abernathy steamed.
CAT: Sorry, the deaf guy I’m with can’t tell when he makes me scream when I’m with him?
Cat cleared the surprise from her face almost immediately and gave the most lascivious grin she could muster. “Are you jealous?”
She opened the door to find not a graying old biddy, but that prototype for male perfection: Clark Kent.
Yes, the prototype. Still has some kinks in the system. Like his Lois Lane fixation.
CLARK: Miss Lane?
“Uh, hi, Cat. I actually need to talk to you about your roommate, if you’ve got a minute?”
He probably wants to get tips how to be with Lois safely. Maybe Jordan can give the poor guy some pointers.
JORDAN:
Because you might not want anything I’ll tell you, unless you’re looking for pointers.”
/points above/
“Why? Afraid he’ll be competition for Superman?” She leaned back and savored another sip of wine.
/points at Lois/
JORDAN: Not. Funny. /burns Back to the Future tapes/
His voice lowered, even though it was just the two of them in the apartment. “An… establishment.”
Cat managed not to choke on the wine. “An establishment?” She looked at Clark with an innocent expression. “Well, goodness, Clark; surely a superhero is allowed to go shopping?”
His ears reddened again. “It was a certain kind of establishment,” he elaborated in a near-mumble. “The kind with…um…women. Dancers. The kind with dancers.” The blush deepened, and Cat awarded herself another point.
This included taking a package to a dear friend who tended bar at one of Metropolis’s more popular “establishments with dancers”.
No doubt a source of valuable intelligence.
At the last minute, though, she remembered that tonight was Ladies’ Night, and Jordan probably wouldn’t enjoy Dale’s performance as much as she would.
JORDAN: /pulls out wad of one dollar bills and mimes dance moves/
Clark let out a breath, looking irritated. “Look, if he plans on outing himself to the world, then he needs avoid any inappropriate behavior!”
That’s Clark’s reason?
CLARK: Lois wouldn’t approve.
What are people going to think when they find out that someone with those abilities can have a sex drive?!”
/points at bachelor auction. Points at Chip Off The Old Clark. Points at Lois. Points at nfic section./
Clark : See?
Cat stared at him. “You really believe that, don’t you,” she breathed.
At least until Lois re-adjusts him.
or a psychopathic monster with a reputation so clean that no one would believe his victims?”
/points at Homelander/
“I myself have some suspicions about a man everyone seems to love,” Clark noted. “But for now, let’s just leave it at that.”
Well, I wouldn’t say they *love* President Tempus, but he’s such a darn nice guy!
Jordan hadn’t gone into that much detail about the fall of Metropolis’s favorite son, but apparently the country boy was sharper than she’d given him credit for.
It’s because Lex made mooney eyes to Lois.
Of course, there was no need to tell Clark what she actually planned to say…
“Had fun with the girls?”
He might look like an innocent farm-boy, or an overly chaste superhero, but the truth was more than clear: Lois Lane was doomed.
Another fun ride!
Michael
