Hi Mary!
A/N: Just a silly little something. Hope y'all enjoy.
Oh, you innocent little author, you!
His father always warned him to stay away from any water that had a log floating in it
Crocodiles?
and now a massive “log” was already streaking towards him.
Yes, a crocodile. Because the Caddy Shack II-type log does not streak on it’s own.
He scrambled for the shore but barely managed to scream before powerful jaws pulled him under.
That’s not good.
In a blind panic, Carlos struck at the gator's nose,
Wait, it’s a bit late for Superman to show up. What if there’s a hint in the ‘C’-name?
Immediately, strong arms were around him, pulling him over to the shallows and then onto land. “Carlos, Mijo!”
Sounds like Lola is going to fall for the nice caballero.
While she frantically patted him over, Carlos slowly became aware that he still had all his limbs and wasn't bleeding.
Huh, who would have thunk?
In fact, the gator's sharp teeth hadn't even left a mark on his skin.
Yes, but aren’t gator’s protected? Did Carlos hurt to poor animal?
So, he had sharper hearing than most boys his age. So, he managed to not get scrapes or bruises when playing sports. So, the summer heat occasionally ignited things when he happened to be nearby.
Let me guess, the young women wore conspicuously little when he was nearby, too?
“Mijo, your mother and I love you with all of our hearts, but...you didn't come to us the natural way.”
Nope, they adopted him when he fell off an army truck.
Florida Man Blames UFO Sighting for Reckless Driving Charge
Oh, striking close to home? I do admit I was wondering if you were going for South America. But gators are more of a Florida thing, aren’t they?
Most of the activity listed was fairly mundane: shop-lifting, a few traffic violations, some petty vandalism, and so on.
Oh, look, Lois Lane is in town. And she’s been busy!
The next day's edition featured his first ever front page article:
Florida Man Arrested for Stealing Flamingo from Zoo
“You're leaving?!” Mr. Russell set the resignation letter next to the newspaper mock-up on his desk and leaned back in his chair, gaping at Carlos. “But...why? If you need more pay—”
Carlos shook his head. “It's not that. Like I said in the letter, it's...personal.”
[…]
Florida Man Survives in Car Thrown by Hurricane, Claims Angel Rescue
Ooops?
Her voice called back from down the hallway. “I got the idea from our trip to the circus museum! If your disguise is really bold and eye-catching, people won't think of you as a normal person!”
He’s not dressing as a luchador, is he?
“Nah!” his father stepped forward and slapped him on the back. “You're just like a luchador! All you need is the mask.”
You added this just so someone could make an extra point in the Scavenger Hunt, did you?
“No mask!” His mother barged in, and Carlos quickly wrapped the red sheet around himself like a towel. “If he wears a mask, people will wonder who is under it.”
He’s wearing the cape wrapped around his head
He probably looks like a Snow Trooper from Star Wars
Only red.
Yes, this might actually work, albeit with a few critical adjustments to the outfit.
Something to…distract from his hip region?
All he needed was a name.
El Maravilloso Hombre!
/checks date/
Hmm…
/goes to FDK thread/
Oh, you linked the wrong thread! Is this part of the date thing or an accident? Because if it *is* an accident, your mods can fix the misplaced FDK!
Michael
