Loved the tweakage, Chris! Absolutely perfect. Thanks for indulging a POVist.
Re the Miami Vice thing (and the Addams family here, too
although I don't know what Psycho is), I didn't mean to imply there was something wrong! I never saw the show (not movie?) either, but as you say, it sinks into the general consciousness. And LnC is certainly the right age for it.
Regarding this section: Oh, my, did I do a double-take when Saxon's "significant other" made her appearance! I didn't recognize her from the description, but that's because (natch
) you do such a lovely job of describing OCs that I wasn't trying to match her to anyone I might know.
Why was CJ trying to be "discreet" about watching the window, the map, and Lois all at once? Seems like a perfectly natural thing to do.
I really enjoyed the A-plot bits with Saxon's explanations and his carefully documented proof. One little suggestion, though: since it's dialogue, and since Saxon is (as far as I know) American, he would say "review" rather than "revision." Of course, other Murcans might disagree.
I'm highly intrigued by the insinuation re what's happening in Arcadia. I can't wait to find out, so give us MORE!
Hazel
