Era: Late first season.
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There was, quite literally, no news.
Well, Jimmy suspected that if someone didn’t say something meeting-saving, Perry would turn this very dull, very quiet staff meeting into something newsworthy. As in a headline reading “Daily Planet Editor murders entire senior staff”.
“He said he wanted to be FRIENDS.” Cat Grant said, concluding a story that Jimmy had tuned out hours ago, with the air of someone finally giving the punch line of a very long, very boring joke.
Lois rolled her eyes. “Oh, how HORRABLE for you.” She mocked. Then, in a voice as though she were speaking to a baby, Lois added “Would it make it all better if he showed up on your front porch wearing nothing but a big red bow?”
An exchange of facial expressions that began with Cat’s insulted expression and somehow ended with Lois’ eyebrows somewhere near her hairline and lips pressed tight into a tiny line. Jimmy didn’t even try to follow what came between.
“Almonds?” CK, who had, in what was in Jimmy’s opinion the worst display of bad decision-making he’d made since arriving at the Planet, sat directly between the two ladies, offered, extending a trey.
“Sure.” Lois responded, though she and Cat reached almost simultaneously.
“C’mon people!” Perry half-shouted. “This is a staff meeting, not social hour! Now, what’ve we got?”
“My neighbors think they’re being watched by deer.” Jimmy supplied, trying, and knowing full well he’d failed miserably, to be helpful.
Lois turned to look at him. “These aren’t the same neighbors that claimed they were kidnapped by the mind-reading aliens, are they?”
Jimmy shifted uncomfortably. “So what if they are?”
Cat, finishing chewing an almond, suggested “Dean Parker is doing something big tomorrow. Something about hills wrapped in tin foil.”
“Well, if THAT isn’t just front-page material!” Perry half-shouted sarcasticly. “Cat, we need something TODAY. Not TOMMROW. And even if we did…somehow I don’t think ‘the hills are alive with the glare of tin foil’ is gonna cut it.”
Just as Jimmy was about to say something, the door flung open, and someone skidded to a stop a few feet into the conference room.
“Guys!” Jack shouted, suddenly. “Guys, Lacey ‘The potion’ Reynolds escaped from prison!”
“Lacey Reynolds?” Lois echoed “The murderer?”
“Actually, he prefers the term poisoner.” Jimmy supplied, getting to his feet along with Lois and Clark. “Says there’s an art to poisoning people as opposed to shooting or something a little more bloody.”
“Whatever” Lois said, heading for the door. “the point is we have a story.”
