* Thank you all for your comments. I've changed Pt 5 so that some of what was in it before is now in Pt 6 instead. I have made some major changes, so Clark doesn't tell so much about himself. Thanks for your input. Let me know if it works better. Tx
***
As the meal progressed, they discussed Lois’ past, her childhood, the things she’d loved to do in the summers when she’d visit with her aunt and uncle in the country, her education, why she’d picked journalism over being a private investigator, her hopes for a Pulitzer and what it would mean for her to win one…
“Did you always have your powers?”
Part 6
“Lois,” he began, not knowing if it was safe to tell her about his past, but being sure that it was unfair to be romantically involved in a one-sided relationship. Then deciding to let nature take its course he continued.
“You asked me about my name and why no one had ever called me that before. There are things I can’t tell you, about my secret, but I want to tell you all that I can. Will you be okay with getting this in dribbles, as I'm feeling safe about talking about it?”
“Of course, Kal.” She said tenderly, coming over to sit on the bench beside him.
He put his arm around her and took a deep breath. “I was born on Krypton. My parents, Lara and JorEl, loved me very much. They knew that the planet was about to blow up. I'm not sure how they knew, but they were quite scientifically advanced. They built a small space ship for their baby and found that earth was a hospitable planet where I may be able to grow up and live. They were taking quite a chance, but they knew that I’d die with them if they did nothing. So they wrapped me in my blanket, it had this ‘S’ on it, and closed me up in my little space ship with some of my toys and sent me off towards earth.
The space ship landed in a field and was discovered by a loving couple who couldn’t have children. It was a good thing that the space ship made a huge streak in the sky, or I may have suffocated in there. I don’t know how long I would have been able to live in there if no one had seen the ship arrive. It must not have taken very long for me to get there, because I don’t think I’d had any food on the way, and there were no traces of food in the ship with me. There wasn’t even a baby bottle or anything. Who knows about being in a dirty diaper…I never asked them about that.”
“I have an alternate identity, which is the part of the secret that I can’t tell you yet. They named me. That’s why I was never called Kalel. It’s because we didn’t know my Kryptonian heritage until just within this last year when Clark found the globe that Bureau 39 had.”
“I didn’t have any powers as I grew up, but they slowly started appearing. I’d pick up the refrigerator or something.” He smiled into her amazed expression, putting his arm around her shoulders. I couldn’t fly till I was 18.” He took a deep breath, waiting to see how Lois was going to react to what he had told her.
“You have a secret identity? What do you mean?”
“Well, it would have been dangerous for my parents to reveal that I was from another planet. Actually they weren’t sure where I was from and why I had powers. That was back in the 60’s when the space program was quite a hot topic. They were sure that I’d be taken from them and that tests would be performed on me to see what an extra-terrestrial was like. So they arranged for me to be adopted and they’ve raised me as their own. So they named me and sent me to school and have taught me all they could about right and wrong.
“I used to help people at home. I can move very quickly, so I was able to go undetected for the most part, but I was always very careful. When I grew up I wanted to live in the big city, find a girl, marry and raise a family, if that would be possible. My mother made me my suit so that I could help people without having to reveal who I really was.” He took a deep breath.
“You really love them, don’t you.” Lois said, squeezing his leg. “It must have been so hard for you to have to have two identities. Were you afraid that people would discover who you were?”
“Constantly. Can you imagine how hard it is to hold down a job when I have to dash off and rescue people all the time? It’s not ever boss that will let you just disappear with no explanation.”
“What do you tell them, your boss, I mean?”
“I make up lame excuses. I'm really not very good at it. I should really sit down and think up some better way of dealing with it than I do.” He looked off into the wall of banana plants across the table, watching the candle light flicker on the greenery. “But Lois,” he paused and sighed, “can you understand why I can’t tell you about my other identity? It’s always been the most heavily guarded secret. If it got out, I’d have to leave Metropolis I'm sure. My whole ability to even exist as a semi-normal man depends on my identity being a secret.”
“Has anyone ever come near to discovering your secret identity?”
“Well, before I had the suits, people would discover that I could do amazing things. I had to leave and begin a new life again.” He sighed deeply again. “I know that having met you means that I’ll have to tell you everything one day, before we get married. But I'm so scared.” He pursed his lips. “Every cell in my body revolts against revealing this secret. Can you understand that? My father always told me I’d be taken away and locked up in a lab and dissected like a frog. I’ve been terrified all my life of that happening.”
“But you’re Superman. Nobody could really ever do that.”
“Have you ever had fears that are so difficult to deal with that it shuts you down?”
She nodded. “Men. Rejection. Being used by men and then rejected.”
He squeezed her shoulder and bent down to place a gentle kiss on her lips. “It’s hard isn't it?”
She nodded. “I’ve built a wall around my heart to keep men out. You’re the first man I’ve allowed in for a long time. Even now, I'm still terrified that you’ll betray me and leave me with the whole world laughing at my back.” Tears began to swim in her eyes.
“Oh Lois, how terrible. I can’t imagine what you’ve been through. I can’t imagine how it must be to be afraid of love. Do you think I’ll betray you, too?”
“Well, not intellectually, but emotionally. I just can’t help it.” Tears were running down her cheeks.
He cupped her face, turning to her and wiped them away with his thumb.
“It tears at the very core of me when you cry.” Her eyes were clear and brown. He felt he could see right into her soul. “It’s the same for me. Intellectually I know I can tell you my secret, well, I think I can. But emotionally I have so many layers of walls to protect myself, that actually telling you is impossible. There’s no way my tongue would form the words. There’s no way it would slip out.” He smiled lopsidedly. “I guess we’re very much alike then. I think it’s more than trust. Because I know I can trust you, I just can’t get beyond what’s deep inside me. Do you understand?”
She did. They sat in silence for a time, each pondering their walls to hide behind. Finally Lois spoke. “I’ve let you in though. I can’t imagine how I did it, but I do feel very safe with you. It’s more than just your powers, it’s your personality. You care so much for me. Nobody in my whole life has ever cared for me as you do.”
He nodded. “I’ll never leave you, Lois. Never. I think we’re soul mates.”
She nodded back, resting her head on his shoulder again to think about what they’d said to one another.
“When we get married, whenever that will be, I want to get married in my secret identity. Otherwise it would be too dangerous for you to be married to you as Superman. We’d not be able to be seen together in my other life. People would think you’re having an affair with my secret identity, otherwise.”
She smiled and nodded. “That makes sense. So do you go off to work every day?”
“Um hum.”
“Do you like your job?”
“Very much.”
“Do people suspect anything?”
“I don’t think so. My boss once caught me about to change into my suit and fly out the window. He was really mystified why I was sitting in the storage closet when I’d told him I was about to make a phone call. I really thought he thought I was crazy.” He laughed. Lois joined in, squeezing his hand she was holding on his lap.
“What did you do?”
“I told him I’d be out in a minute and eventually he left and I flew out the window.” He chuckled as he remembered it. “I’ve been doing this for so long that it’s second nature to cover up my powers.”
“It must be.” She nodded. “You know, it’s really hard for me as an investigative reporter to not immediately go search the databases for all the unexplained rescues in the world and launch a full scale search into who your other identity is.”
He nodded. “I know. But please…”
“No, I won’t.” she squeezed his hand quickly. “I have gone this long without finding out. I'm amazed I hadn’t thought of it earlier. “But I'm sure that if I bump into you and find your other self is quite like this one, I'm bound to start thinking. Secrets and surprises aren’t my forte. I don’t do them well.”
“I feel good that I’ve told you this much. Are you mad at Clark for not telling you about me?”
She shrugged, “well, sort of. But I guess he’s been afraid of telling your secret, too.”
“He’s mortified something would happen to me.”
She nodded. “He told me today that you knew his parents and had gone out there to visit with them.”
He nodded. “I had to tell them about being engaged to you. They were really worried about my secret. My mom thinks I should just tell you, but my dad isn’t so sure. None of us have ever unlocked this pandora’s box. Not even a tiny bit.”
The musicians had migrated over to their booth and were playing beside them to their left. Lois looked out toward the ocean to the right, watching the waves break almost in time with the music, the white caps in the distance appearing and disappearing.
“Why is it so light over the ocean?” Lois asked suddenly.
Clark pointed to the spotlights on the top of the main building behind the musicians. “It’s nice, isn’t it. I wondered about that myself when I first noticed it.”
“Thank you for letting me tell you my secret in dribbles, Lois.” Clark said, cupping her cheek with his right hand and bringing his mouth down to hers.
Her hand slid up around his shoulders as she felt the warmth of his lips against hers and returned the kiss. Oblivious to the romantic music and the presence of the serenadors, they took no thought of anything else as their emotions blended together as their kiss deepened. Finally, holding one another close, they both whispered simultaneously.
“I love you, Lois.”
“I love you Kalel.”
Some time later, they were flying back to Metropolis, enjoying breathing each other’s fragrance, feeling the warmth of each others bodies, content in one another's arms.
“See you in the morning,” Clark said as he stepped away from his sweetheart. We’ll have a great day together tomorrow!” With that, he was out the window and soon landing on the balcony of 344 Clinton Street, his red cape falling in behind him as he walked through the door.
