He woke up first.
He lay there a long while looking at the sleeping woman in his arms. In repose she was beautiful and relaxed. She looked so vulnerable lying there, and he felt an intense surge of protective tenderness mixed with an anger which was now like second skin to him.
Lord Kal. Used to wake her up. He used to wake her up out of her sleep to force himself on her. Oh god… what if he fell asleep with her? What if when she wakes up, she thinks I’m him at first? What if she thinks she’s back there? What if I fall asleep again and then start to float? What if he floated? I can’t let that happen. I can’t risk that happening. I have to get up now, so that doesn’t happen. But then, what if she feels abandoned? I mean – I don’t want her remembering all the men in her life who weren’t there for her when she needed them. I … I guess the best thing I can do is something completely un-Kal-like. Un-Claude-like. I’ll get up and make her the best breakfast I can make… pamper her, make her feel really special and loved.
With that in mind, he extricated his limbs from hers and gingerly eased himself off the bed.
Whew! Finally… managed to leave her asleep.
Some time later, Lois woke up alone.
Where am I? Oh.. Yeah. Clark’s…
Her mind wandered lazily as she remembered the events of the night before. She felt warmth invade every part of her body as she recalled his passion, his tenderness and even how masterful he had been at times. His unflagging generosity – all the while giving… easing off when he worried he was frightening her. And she hadn’t been frightened… not much anyway, and in the end, she had experienced moments where she felt fully able and willing to consummate the relationship. A far cry from the frightened woman she had been a little over a year ago, unable to even look him in the eye.
Where is he? An emergency? Superman needed somewhere?
The sounds and smells emanating from the kitchen answered her question.
He’s making breakfast.
An image of Clark wearing nothing except an apron popped into her head, and she fought to stifle the giggle which she knew he would hear.
I don’t want him thinking I’m giggling about last night.
She sat up, and stretched, enjoying the sensual feeling of the movement.
Oh god… last night… he was so… incredible… and he did it all for me. How did he cope – he didn’t get any release… did he have trouble falling asleep? Oh god… I hope not…but I fell right off, and it’s no wonder… he really helped me….to relax…
She swung her legs over the edge of the bed, and realized she was mostly naked.
Maybe I need that apron. I can’t go out there like this… especially with my… brand… I have to borrow something…
She had clothes to wear, but wanted to shower before wearing them.
A robe?
She got up and padded over to his closet.
He’s so neat. But I guess cleaning up doesn’t tire him out or take up any time. Hey … another great thing about marrying Clark… he can do all the housework… of course… then I’d just be taking advantage of him… and that wouldn’t be right… would it? Would it be so bad to rely on his superpowers and indefatigable nature to get certain things done?
An image of Clark staying up all night with a crying baby formed in her mind, and she flushed, thinking that someday soon they would be that intimate… someday soon they might have a baby.
I guess I’d be the one getting up… if I was nursing… which I expect I’d do. And… I’d have to teach our children sports… because he could really hurt them… so I guess I’ll be doing my share of work. Which is good. As it should be… but I’ll never have to clean another tub again…here’s something. Silky. And… black…
She held it up and looked at it… his robe… a sensuous silky robe that would cling to him in a very appealing way… but it was black… and black… well… black was scary. Very scary. A Lord-Kal color.
She visualized Clark wearing his robe and her heart clenched in dread.
I can’t wear this… it’s too… too much… maybe someday I’ll be ready to see him in this… but … why does he have to like black? I mean – it totally suits his coloring, and he looks beautiful in black, but – he scares me like that… I can’t let something like that get the better of me though. I can’t marry someone and then be afraid of them when they were a certain color… or outfit… like Superman – like I freaked out on him yesterday… I have to conquer that before we marry.
She took a deep calming breath.
Okay. So here we have t-shirts. Neatly folded of course…. And look – a Daily Planet shirt. Perfect.
She slipped it on, and it hung down to her thighs.
Huge … but what did I expect… he’s a big guy… a really big guy… in all the places where big is …beautiful. Okay. Lois. Stop thinking about that. Because I’m not sure if it’s scary or sexy… and that’s freaking me out.
She stood nervously for a few moments. Will he think I look silly? Gearing up her courage in the face of her sudden shyness, she forced herself to walk through his bedroom door.
He looked up at her as she came out, taking a momentary break from his final touches on breakfast.
“Hey,” he said, with that big devastating smile that removed all thought from the forefront of her mind. “You look VERY sexy in my shirt.”
She smiled, feeling extremely shy, and forced herself to maintain eye contact.
“Thanks… I should have brought a robe…”
“Hey, you could have borrowed mine… but you look really amazing the way you are.”
“Yeah… I … thought about it… but… it was too big, so I went for this.”
“It’s … you.”
“It’s a daily planet shirt,” she said unnecessarily. “Extra large of course… like all the ones I once had… remember my rant about logo tee-shirts?”
“I remember it well,” he smiled. Why had we even been talking about that? Oh… oh yeah…. Because I showed up in black. God – it’s a good thing I didn’t wear that robe…I hope that robe didn’t upset her…
“So… I figured the daily planet shirt would be appropriate.”
“Definitely,” he said, forcing his mind back to the present. “Especially as I gave you my job. You might as well have my shirts too…”
“You… what? You didn’t give me your job – hey… I got that job fair and – “ She trailed off as she saw the twinkle in his eyes.
“Okay, wise-guy.”
“I know you got it on your own credentials, Lois. “
“You gave up your job for me… didn’t you.” She was sober now as she aimed her gaze directly at his.
“I… left the Daily Planet because I wanted you to feel safe there. It was your home first, Lois… you deserved to be able to go back without having to deal with me.”
“Oh Clark…”
“And honestly… it hasn’t been that bad. I get to freelance, and spend more time helping people out.”
“Don’t you miss it?”
“The daily grind? I mean… I did… but I’m comfortable with how things are now.”
“You know- if you went back - maybe we could be partners.”
“We are partners… and I think overlaying that with partnering at work might… be… uh… I don’t know – most people… don’t want to work with their … spouses…”
“Too much togetherness,” she asked lightly, trying to hide her hurt at the idea that he might feel that way.
“Oh. God. I could never have that… but you might someday feel a little stifled… or – you know… I don’t know. Right now, all I want is to be near you… “
“Me too,” she said, relieved. “It’s so… intense. It’s a good thing that we’re going to tell people soon - I know I can’t hide how I feel when you’re around.”
“Uh… right… “
“Clark?”
“You know… breakfast is going to get cold… how about we eat – and then we talk about this…okay?”
“Um… sure.”
She eyed him worriedly as she sat down, easily slipping into the role of being served upon. A girl could get used to this.
After taking her first mouthful she smiled at him broadly.
“Okay, already – you got the job… stop being so darned wonderful at everything.”
“You’ve never heard me sing.” It was meant as a joke, but a sudden horrific thought hit him. Did Kal ever sing? God – how could I say that?
“Mmmm… well… I won’t press you to sing for me now… but… you’ve aroused my curiosity.”
“Aroused, you say…”
“Clark…” Her tone was warning, but her eyes twinkled.
“Lois… okay. Let’s talk about this…”
“Did you… change your mind,” she asked, her voice suddenly small. “I mean – if you did…”
“No! No… I didn’t. I couldn’t… I’m so hopelessly in love with you.”
“Oh no… don’t break out into Olivia Newton-John tunes…”
He grinned at her. “I can’t do a falsetto – I’m only capable of so much, Lois…”
She blushed as she remembered some of his amazing capabilities the night before. He’s a natural at that… that’s for sure.
“Okay. So you love me desperately… so… why are you … afraid?”
He winced and then stood up agitatedly. He paced a few steps away from her. Silence dragged on for long moments, and then he turned to face her, his expression clearly showing some kind of inner turmoil.
“Clark? Come on… you can tell me anything. What’s wrong? Are you … afraid to tell people… is it too … final for you?”
He moved with urgency back to the couch, forcibly tempering his speed to that of a normal human. He sat back down next to her, and took her hands lovingly in his.
“Absolutely not,” he said earnestly. “It isn’t that… not anywhere near that… I just… it’s scary, Lois. Facing your parents with this news… I - won’t … what if they mind?”
“You’re afraid they won’t like it. That they won’t like us… together.”
“I’m almost convinced that they won’t.”
“Clark. You’re a wonderful man. The whole world thinks so… what? What is it?”
“I… you know how last night I had to go out on an emergency run?”
“Yeah,” she said flushing a bit as she remembered her embarrassing reaction at seeing him as Superman. “I’m really sorry I got all weird on you…”
“No… no! I’m not – it’s not that. I… I – it’s just… people treated me differently. I could swear they were treating me differently – on account of the clone… on account of the way he behaved. I could see it…feel it… it was awful…fear…”
“They were afraid of you? Because of that idiot? Come on – they must have read my article by now,” she said, her outrage increasing by the second. “I explained everything that happened. It’s on the evening news, for crying out loud! If these people don’t know what happened by now…they’re stupid. You were the victim… not the aggressor!”
“Lois – I think they all know that it wasn’t me… but his behavior must have kind of reminded people how dangerous I could possibly be… I mean… how can I really expect people to …trust me to that level?”
“I trust you,” she said quietly.
“I know,” he said, leaving the rest unsaid. But you didn’t always. Once you feared me. Once you hated me… once you wrote scathing articles about how I was going to take over the world.
“I guess I shouldn’t throw stones,” she added. “You know… living in this glass house of mine…”
“Lois…”
“Clark. I know I acted … I know I treated you horribly when I first came home, but I had good reason to be wary of you. I suffered for three years in another world at the hands of a man who … you resemble… and… that’s bound to have an effect on a person. But these people only had the clone in their midst for a day… how fickle! One stupid day… and they turn against you?”
“Lois, to be fair, nobody was yelling ‘alien, go home’ at me. It was just… a new wariness, one I hadn’t seen in a while… and –“
“In a while?”
“When I first… outed myself as an alien… everyone was inclined to treat me with a great deal of caution… and who can blame them… I’d have felt the same way in their shoes… things did get better… and then…” He trailed off again, horrified that he was actually going to talk about how her articles changed the tide of public opinion.
“After my series… after I started writing my articles?”
Damn. She’s too astute.
“Well… yeah… it did get a little weird… but… you know – things have been good lately - “
She grinned at him. “You did earn points by saving us all from the asteroid,” she said, briefly breaking the mood with humor.
“I guess… yeah, it kind of did feel that way. I didn’t do it for that reason …”
“No. You did it because you were the only one who could, and knowing that, you had to do it. That’s the kind of man you are, and if people can’t see that… then I feel sorry for them. It’s not … you don’t have to feel like you need every earthling to approve of you – to not fear you… it’s okay if some do… you –“
“It may seem like it’s okay,” he said quietly. “But it hurts me, nonetheless. I know it’s crazy. But it does.”
“I’m sorry,” she said repentantly. “I really have no right to say what should or shouldn’t hurt you.”
“It’s just that… I – I hate it when people are afraid of me. It makes me feel awkward, uncomfortable… and… nervous… it’s just not a fun place to be.”
“I must have really hurt you then,” she said, feeling guilty.
“Well… yeah, I was hurt that you were afraid of me… because I loved you, so it hurt that you were… but you know, I wasn’t… I don’t blame you for it or anything… you know that, right?”
“I do. But it hurts me to hurt you. I know it’s crazy… but it does.”
“Point taken,” he said, smiling at her deliberate mimicry.
“So you think that because people are warier of you thanks to your clone, that now my parents will be less accepting of our relationship?”
“It’s more than that, Lois… but yeah, that’s a part of it. First… I’m an alien. Do you honestly think anyone ever watches their little girl grow up thinking ‘I hope she settles down with a nice extraterrestrial?’”
“Oh… Clark - it’s not like people have really had that option to think that way… if we lived in a more… galactic community, don’t you think we’d have broken through those barriers by now? I know we humans can be very insular and bigoted… but… eventually we try to evolve past it…even if it takes us a long time.”
“I’m not blaming anyone for feeling that way, if they do… but just saying that it’s possible they would, and it would make me feel bad to … know that I was found lacking on the most fundamental level by people who would soon be family. Family is very important to me… you know?”
“I know,” she said softly.
“And then,” he said, wincing at her in apology. “There’s the whole… Lord Kal thing. The fact that he hurt you so horribly. Won’t they think it’s weird that you’re with me after all that? Won’t they be afraid that I might… hurt you someday? If not physically, then… just emotionally, because I … resemble him?”
“Clark,” she said evenly. “ I can’t promise they won’t worry about all this stuff. Parents are very strange sometimes when it comes to protecting their kids. But… I can promise you this… I love you. I will always love you. I want us to marry. I also want my family to be a part of our life… so… they will… get over it, if there is any ‘it’ to get over. I’ll be at your side… through it all… for better, for worse…right?”
He gave her a loving smile.
“Right.”
[tbc]
