Last time
“So you think that because people are warier of you thanks to your clone, that now my parents will be less accepting of our relationship?”
“It’s more than that, Lois… but yeah, that’s a part of it. First… I’m an alien. Do you honestly think anyone ever watches their little girl grow up thinking ‘I hope she settles down with a nice extraterrestrial?’”
“Oh… Clark - it’s not like people have really had that option to think that way… if we lived in a more… galactic community, don’t you think we’d have broken through those barriers by now? I know we humans can be very insular and bigoted… but… eventually we try to evolve past it…even if it takes us a long time.”
“I’m not blaming anyone for feeling that way, if they do… but just saying that it’s possible they would, and it would make me feel bad to … know that I was found lacking on the most fundamental level by people who would soon be family. Family is very important to me… you know?”
“I know,” she said softly.
“And then,” he said, wincing at her in apology. “There’s the whole… Lord Kal thing. The fact that he hurt you so horribly. Won’t they think it’s weird that you’re with me after all that? Won’t they be afraid that I might… hurt you someday? If not physically, then… just emotionally, because I … resemble him?”
“Clark,” she said evenly. “ I can’t promise they won’t worry about all this stuff. Parents are very strange sometimes when it comes to protecting their kids. But… I can promise you this… I love you. I will always love you. I want us to marry. I also want my family to be a part of our life… so… they will… get over it, if there is any ‘it’ to get over. I’ll be at your side… through it all… for better, for worse…right?”
He gave her a loving smile.
“Right.”
And now...
Lois leaned against the warm and solid body of her future husband, enjoying the closeness as they sat on a warm sandy beach watching a beautiful sunset. She wasn’t exactly sure where they were, but they were alone, and that was all the mattered.
“Now that wasn’t so bad, was it? Less like pulling teeth than you’d imagined?”
He flashed her a perfect smile.
“I… have no idea what pulling teeth is like. Sounds really awful though, and definitely one of the benefits to invulnerability.”
“I’ve never had one pulled either,” she smiled back. “I take good care of mine and have been gifted with good genetics, as far as that’s concerned.”
“Lois, it was fine. It was… it was incredible actually.”
“You really mean that.”
“Yeah. I do.”
“Many guys view the whole ‘meeting-of-family’ as something to be borne.”
He took a deep breath.
“I guess… I did. But not for the reasons you probably are alluding to. Lois – I was really afraid they wouldn’t approve.”
“My parents have not approved of most of the decisions I’ve made in my life, and it’s never stopped me from forging ahead on a path that seemed right to me.”
“This is different.”
“I told you though that I made decisions for myself as far as… forever is concerned… you seemed to believe me at the time… do you think I’d have changed my mind based on a negative parental reaction?”
“No. Absolutely not.”
“Then – it’s… you really wanted their acceptance.. Their approval meant something to you on a deeply personal level.”
“You got it.”
“You were close to your parents… their opinion meant a lot to you.” It was more a statement than a question.
“Everything, but then again. I was just a kid. However… I know the other Clark has a very close relationship with his parents, and … well, I can imagine that their opinion on what he does means very much to him.”
“They sound worthy of that. Many parents aren’t. Many parents can’t let their kids make their own decisions without … being negative. Mine were like that, once, and they seem to have been replaced by pod people. Say. As our only resident alien, you wouldn’t have anything to do with that, would you?”
The incredulous look he sent her made her clap a hand over her mouth to prevent a loud guffaw.
“Lois, really…” His tone was injured and indignant.
“Oh. Now I’ve offended you?” Her grin negated the seriousness of the question. Lois Lane was the one person who could make such a crack to Clark Kent and not have it contain a single ounce of sting.
“Never.” The smooth huskiness of his voice sent shivers throughout her body.
“So… you're happy then? I mean about my family?”
“Yes… you… you do think they were being sincere… weren't they? I guess I don’t know them well enough to know if they weren’t – and – “
“Yes. They were. At first, I could see that my mom was terrified, and yes… I was afraid she was worried about… well – offending you… but it didn’t take long for me to figure out that she was mostly afraid of upsetting me.”
“I saw that your mom was nervous… but she did end up relaxing. I’m just glad nothing awful happened.”
“Awful? Like what?”
“Like Sam hauling out a shotgun loaded with kryptonite bullets.”
She giggled. “Clark!”
“Heck, even if it had been a water gun- just the idea that he felt that strongly would have been painful.”
“Poor Clark,” she said, soberly. “It can’t be easy being on the fringes of everything. I mean – people love you, but… feeling like… you’re still not really fully welcome – that has to be hard.”
“You make me feel welcome. That’s all that matters… isn’t it?”
“I generally think mine is the only opinion that matters,” she said, a twinkle in her eyes. "So now...now what?"
“Talk to Cat?”
“We need to tell Perry. We also should tell Lana. They both deserve to know first. And then… we go public.”
“Wow. Public.”
“Which is just in time, when you think about it,” she said. “Lana’s wedding is in a few days, and now – we can go as a couple.”
“A couple. I like that.”
“Oh… god… but what about Lana? I mean – won’t she feel upstaged? And after I already ruined her first… wedding… well – not so much her wedding – but her engagement – and I know it wasn’t me – but – “
Lois was babbling, and that meant she was afraid. He gripped her hand gently, stopping the flow of words with his touch.
“Lois – we can wait on the whole public aspect, if you aren’t ready.”
“I am ready! I’m sorry, Clark. I know you – you’re trying to be mindful of what I need - but I am ready. I just – it’s just so… it’s kind of frightening – the idea that I’ll be that much in the public eye.”
“Oh… yeah… you will be. I’m sorry. I can’t do a thing about that.”
“It’s okay. I’ve faced far worse, and survived. Besides – many of the members of our fine guild are actually afraid of me. That’ll work in our favor.”
“Seriously though. Are you going to be okay with that?”
“I .. I don’t know. Since – since… my imprisonment… I haven’t really wanted to attract a lot of personal attention – to me… as a person… I mean, even my article series, which gave me quite a bit of … fame, of a sorts… I didn’t want that fame. I just wanted … um… well… I did it because I felt… I… “
“It’s okay, Lois. I’m not … injured by that. I know – you felt you were protecting your … world… your people.”
“It was so stupid of me. How could I look at you and see a threat?”
“Lois, if you traveled back in time to the person you were when you returned to this world, and you swore up and down to her that you were her, from the future… and you told her you had had a change of heart where I was concerned... I’m laying 100% odds that she would STILL have perceived me as a threat, and continued on her mission to stop me from whatever she perceived my ultimate plans to be.”
“Well… maybe… but then, she wouldn’t have known that I was her. She might have thought I was just an alternate Lois – or … a … an imposter. But then, I’d … have been able to tell her about our shared past, and…oh… yeah… my burn mark… that’d be a direct giveaway… it looks too – unusual – too … well – Kryptonian - and…” She trailed away, her expression becoming distant and worried.
“Lois?”
“I… I just … I just thought… ” she said, her face pale and drawn.
“What is it? What’s wrong? Are you feeling all right? Is – oh god- are you having a panic attack – or “
“Oh. No. I’m – I’m feeling fine. Clark. No – I just… I have a very distinctive burn mark on my body. Clark! I can’t ever go see a doctor. I mean – what if someone thinks… “ She winced in disgust at the thought. “What if someone thinks you did that… I – what if someone thinks … that we’re that twisted that… “ She winced again. She looked at him, stricken.
“Clark, what am I going to do? I can’t ever see a doctor? I mean – that’s just not possible, and – I think I need to get a doctor’s checkup before we can get a marriage license, and – and – god – what am I going to do about it? How am I going to explain this away? How am I going to – “
“Lois. Please. Please… calm down. Please? We can work this out, but – “
“It’s just – Clark – it’s so – it looks like your symbol – not exactly – but kind of – and – almost anyone seeing it is going to think you did it – except people who really know you – I mean – that goes without saying, but then – maybe someone might think … god… I can’t have people thinking you would do that. I can’t have people thinking that … that I would want you to do that… or that you would do that to me against my wishes, and that I’d still stay with you. Then – don’t you see – people would start thinking of you in terms of my article series – they’d think that you had somehow … well- hypnotized me into loving you – as a way to amuse yourself – revenge for the articles – and then – and then – nobody would trust you, and – they’d try to find a way to stop you – “ She paused her frantic discourse, and shut her eyes, trying desperately to get herself under control.
Opening them again, she looked at him fixedly.
“I have to get rid of this burn mark,” she said, her voice now level again, the thread of panic that had been in her voice was temporarily subdued.
“Um… okay. That – that makes sense… just… how… plastic surgery?”
“No. I can’t… I mean – I can’t. Right? I can’t go to a doctor – the doctor will see it, and then the next thing you know it’ll be all over the internet… and – “ Panic had entered her voice again, and she seemed to be ramping up again. “Worse… even if the doctor and the doctor’s staff could be trusted… the fact that I was getting plastic surgery would probably get out, and that would be damaging as well.”
“Okay, Okay – that was just a first suggestion,” he offered hastily, trying to get her back to problem solving mode.
“I – I – a tattoo might be an easier thing to … hide from the public. I mean – not the tattoo – but the… circumstances… the oddity… I’d have to go to an out of the way shop – someplace where people don’t talk – ever – about who comes in, and what they have done…”
He winced at that. “A creepy tattoo parlor sounds … like… something that would make me really uncomfortable as far as your personal safety – and – “ He trailed off, not ever wanting to make her feel like he was dictating what she could and couldn’t do.
“Well… I mean – what about… what about you?” An idea had come to her. A terrifying and awful idea, but it was the best idea yet. The one that offered up the most discretion.
“What about me?”
“You… you could help me …” Her voice was very small as she made the suggestion.
“I don’t know what you mean,” he said, his voice suddenly wary as he took in the physical change coming about her. She was stiffening and tensing. She was afraid, and he was suddenly afraid to know why.
“You could remove my burn mark,” she said quietly, forcing him to deduce what she was talking about.
“I… I’m not a doctor…and… I – I – I’m not a - tattoo… artist… and…”
“You’re a Kryptonian. With the power to burn things with your eyes.”
He was flabbergasted. He felt like he had known the idea as soon as it had come to her, but his mind had shied away from believing that she would ever even propose something like that.
Hurt you like that? Scar you like that? Mark you like that? Never…never ever!
Now, it was his turn to be pale. He leapt to his feet, moving away from her as if burned by her very touch. His soul felt seared.
“I…”
“Clark. This would work. You could just… you know…” She was trying to be calm and matter-of-fact about it, but he caught the trembling in her voice and turned to face her. She looked so vulnerable – offering forth an idea that resonated with horror for her. Not even taking a moment to decide if now was the right time for physical contact, he reached out for her, and pulled her close, trying to gain and give comfort in their embrace.
“I couldn’t,” he said, his voice muffled by her hair. “I couldn’t. Ever.”
“Even… even if I asked,” she whispered, the trembling still there. “Even if… if… I… needed you to do this?”
“You… “ He pushed away from her gently. “You… you can’t …. I can’t. I can’t do that.” He felt like he was going to dissolve into an emotional mess if she didn’t stop this. He kept thinking of Kal, and what Kal had done to her, and how it must have been so absolutely horrible for her, and he couldn’t ever imagine himself doing something like that. Hurting her like that… even if it’s what she wanted him to do. How could he ever forgive himself for doing that – and even more to the point… how could she?
“You won’t,” she said, her voice defeated. “And so now, I have this huge problem – this huge stupid problem – and I don’t have any way of getting around it – any way that might not completely destroy our … peace… imagine if people thought that … you did that? Imagine how … imagine how we’d be treated – by others- by the press – it’s be horrible – and – “
“I can’t!” His voice rose, and he found himself, to his utter dismay, shouting the words, flinging them out there in angry denial of what she was asserting.
Oh god. Oh god. Oh god, oh god. I yelled at her.
She flinched away in learned action, and he closed his eyes, calling upon every possible deity in the universe to come to their aid.
Help us. Make this turn out all right. Please!
“I’m sorry,” he said, looking away from her, ashamed by his outburst. He was startled when he felt her hand on his arm.
“No. Don’t be sorry,” she said, her voice tight with her own emotional struggles. “I … I know I – pushed you – “
“Please… no,” he groaned. “Don’t say you pushed me into it. That just has such horrific connotations…”
“Clark. I asked you to do something that goes against everything you believe in. You’re entitled to actually get upset over that.”
He took a deep and calming breath. “So now what. What do we do? I mean – you know – please – please – please – tell me, you know that I can’t do this. You understand? You get this? Please?”
“I … I do…”
”I mean, how could I do this – to you- of all people – I couldn’t do it to anyone, but to you? And then – I mean – you – how could you bear it? How could you even hold still? Nobody could… it’d be a natural physical reflex – to try to avoid the heat – to … to move away from – and I couldn’t just … hold you … down… so – “
“You… could sedate me.”
“Sleeping pills? You’d still wake up – you’d be in so much pain - you’d still… wake… up…”
“No. Anesthesia… something that would – that you’d give someone for surgery.”
The tone of her voice. That of making plans. Of putting things in place. It terrified him.
“Lois – we can’t… we can’t… get that… at the local drugstore - and - getting anesthesia any other way – you just don’t ask your doctor for it – and – god – talk about your bad press…”
“Clark… what about Bernie Klein? He’s got to have access to stuff like this. And he can be trusted right, to be discreet? He – we could explain the whole thing to him – and once he knew – wouldn’t he want to help us out? I – “
“Bernie. Oh god. I forgot. Of course. Bernie. Yes… yes… I do think he could help!”
She saw the gleam of an idea growing in Clark’s eyes, and felt dread suddenly at the pit of her stomach. All along, she’d been trying to convince him to do something to her that would be absolutely terrifying to her. And now – now that it may have worked – now that he may have been convinced – she felt a sudden urge to get as far away from him as possible. No! No – I changed my mind!
“Wh – what … do you mean? How… “
“Oh – god… no – no – no – not that,” he said, pulling her close again, trying desperately to reassure her with his touch. “Never that…”
“Then what,” she asked softly. “How could he help?”
“Lois – he’s a doctor. He could… alter the look of your burn mark – you know? Or… do some surgical procedure to remove it – or – or something. I’m sure he could come up with something. Would you be willing to go see him? To go talk to him about this?”
“That depends on you – I mean – are you willing for him to know about – the other world…the other you? Maybe – maybe it could turn him against you –maybe he’d start trying to find ways of stopping you - so... so if you ever… I mean – we both know you never would – but what if he started thinking that you could?”
“It’s a chance… and I’m willing to take it.”
[tbc]
