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Columnist
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OP
Columnist
Joined: Apr 2003
Posts: 543 |
Wow Krissie, That's amazing.
The structure of showing us Lois growing up next the few hours Clark is spending trying to comes to terms with being alone on Christmas is wonderful.
My favourite part was the snow--the way Lois heard the snow falling just as Clark did. And the way the snow was a metaphor for her family relationship...her father's footsteps ruining the perfect snow and then being covered up by more snow.
Oh, wait a minute...I forgot that my favourite part was Lois's dreams of flying and the way Molly explained the various interpretations until dreaming about flying was just fun.
Beautifully written, Krissie. Can't wait for the next part.
gerry
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Pulitzer
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Pulitzer
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This is terrific, Chris! Poignant as all get-out, of course. Personally, I liked the bit where Lois said she'd always felt sorry for Don Diego But it was all very good. So, part 2 will be posted later today, right? PJ
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Features Writer
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Features Writer
Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 845 |
Hi Krissie , Er... Mind if I say I didn't understand it? I am an ESL reader though. I just hope I can understand it better when the second part comes. Interesting so far! MDL.
"Work while you have the light. You are responsible for the talent that has been entrusted to you."
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Kerth
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Kerth
Joined: Apr 2003
Posts: 2,217 |
Yeah, where is she? Jose
"Practice up your shielding spells...and remember to duck if you see green light coming your way." Harry Potter to Wizengamot in OotP trial A Bad Week in the Wizengamot
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Pulitzer
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Pulitzer
Joined: Apr 2003
Posts: 3,454 |
Wow, Chris! You know, your stories always do this to me. I just wish there were a lot more of them! Absolutely beautiful. Gerry and Pam already said how I felt about the parallels and the metaphors and Lois's attitude to Christmas and the poignancy. Just lovely and wistful and achingly longing. Poor Clark, so lonely. Poor Lois, searching for something and she doesn't even know what it is. She just knows that it involves flying and chocolate-brown eyes. This made me laugh: Oh, who's that really rich guy that everyone gets compared to?"
"Croesus?"
"Nah." Lucy rolled her eyes. "Lex Luthor." Now, Part 2 tomorrow, yes? Wendy
Just a fly-by! *waves*
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Merriwether
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Merriwether
Joined: Jun 2003
Posts: 1,763 |
quote: -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Lois sat back on her sofa and sighed. Christmas was almost over and, as ever, it had been something of an anti-climax. Every year it was the same: so much build up, then -- poof! -- it was over in an instant. She'd had such high hopes for this year, too.
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I always felt that way.
I am really enjoying how you go back and forth between Lois and Clark. The bits about snow was lovely.
I was a bit confused by this discription
quote: -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Lois pulled her chair up tight against the bedroom wall, folded her arms on the windowsill and laid her chin on top of them. --------------------------------------------------------------------------------
As I read the rest of that part, I fell in love with it.
While Lois was in the caf with her two buds - that was too funny. Flying was an intergral part of my dreams when I was in my teens and early 20s
quote: -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- I have a photograph of her that I sneaked out of the Daily Planet's morgue. It's tucked away discreetly in my wallet, behind my video rental card. --------------------------------------------------------------------------------
DP has a morgue?
The way you set up the characters - it shows that these two alt-LnC are meant for eachother. The comparisons are so sweet. I feel horrible for Clark. Lois seems to be faring better.
I can hardly wait for the next part. I want to see how all this is wrapped up. I'm curious as to why you wrote it in the style you did. I'm hoping that everything connects together for me in my brain in the next part. So far all this has made me very interested!! SOmetimes I was a bit confsed b/c I'm sleepy, but hey I'm up for reading fic even when I am. Please post soon! I need a fix.
I didn't catch it at first b/c there was no blue arrow and boy am I glad I did see it when I woke up a bit more. I have a habit of waking up, grabbing a drink and plunking myself down in my chair to read. Though when I do that sometimes I have to read the fic over LOL.
I've converted to lurk-ism... hopefully only temporary.
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Pulitzer
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Pulitzer
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Roo, all newspapers have morgues. It's where old cuttings and copies of the paper are kept. Wendy
Just a fly-by! *waves*
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Merriwether
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Merriwether
Joined: Jun 2003
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Thanks for the FYI - I was sooo confused. I always heard it called the archives. LOL
Dead reporters kept for later use. MDL told me TOGOM's featured technology would come into use there. LOL
I've converted to lurk-ism... hopefully only temporary.
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Top Banana
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Top Banana
Joined: Apr 2003
Posts: 1,133 |
All I can say is wow. Wow. Wow. I LOVE Lois and Lucy's interaction. My heart breaks for Clark. Hurry, hurry, hurry and post the next part! And this "Meaning ignorance is bliss, I suppose?" asked Lois. "I guess that would explain a lot about your grades this semester, Linda, and why you've been so much keener on studying the football team than your books. It's been self-defence!" makes me think of my lovely sister. . - Laura
Laura "The Yellow Dart" U. (Alicia U. on the archive)
"A hero is an ordinary individual who finds the strength to persevere and endure in spite of overwhelming obstacles." -- Christopher Reeve
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Top Banana
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Top Banana
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Wonderfully lyric and so well written. I loved it!
Can't wait for the big meet!
~Liz
Lois: Can I go? Clark: No. Lois: Oh come on, Clark, why do we go through this? We both know I’m going to go. Clark: Then why do you ask? Lois: I’m trying to be nice.
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Pulitzer
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Pulitzer
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Chris WOW! This is excellent. Tricia
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Columnist
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Columnist
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Hi Chris,
You already know my thoughts on this story, but I was so happy to see it up on the MBs and getting the wonderful comments it so richly deserves.
You write with such style and flow, Chris, and you always touch the heart.
Yours Jenni
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Beat Reporter
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Beat Reporter
Joined: Apr 2003
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Thank you. Thank you thank you thankyouthankyouthankyou all so very, very much for the kind words! Believe it or not, I do need reassurance about my writing. (Okay, okay, I know that most writers do, but... I can't help worrying that there is a good reason why I've never managed to get a hold of one of those elusive Kerths. As a result, all kind words and encouragement are always very gratefully received.) I'm delighted that people have found so many different things to like and comment on in this. Maybe I've done the impossible, and found something to please everyone. Probably not, but it's a nice thought! MDL: I'm sorry that you don't understand this at the moment. (Hopefully things will make more sense after the second part. There is a point to it all, believe me.) Ah, yes, Jose, but did you like it? Wendy, you said (along with some very nice things): And you would have to cut off just when Clark seems to know where Lois is! Argh!! You are evil! If I am evil, it is only because I've learned from the mistresses of evil who hang around here. Does Clark know where Lois is? Maybe... Gerry, Pam, SuperRoo, Laura, Liz, Tricia and Jenni: thank you all, too. I'll post the second part either tomorrow or on Wednesday. Chris
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Pulitzer
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Pulitzer
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Pulitzer
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Pulitzer
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Hi, Great piece. More soon, please. MAF
Maria D. Ferdez. --- Don't like Luthor, unfinished, untitled and crossover story, and people that promises and don't deliver. I'm getting choosy with age. MAF
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Hack from Nowheresville
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Hack from Nowheresville
Joined: Apr 2003
Posts: 231 |
The more Christmas stories, the merrier!!! Especially Alt-Christmas Stories!!!! Even the paparazzi will stay away. They always do. They have done ever since they realised two things. One, I'm actually a very dull person. I don't talk to them. I don't court them. Most of all, I don't do anything that they could spin into a story. Two, their photos never come out anyway. I see to that. I'm off to read part 2!!!
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Pulitzer
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Pulitzer
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Aw that was a really cute Christmas story and I really liked it! Merry Christmas by the way and great job! Laura
Clark: “If we can be born in an instant, and die in an instant, why can’t we fall in love in an instant?”
Caroline's "Stardust"
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Beat Reporter
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Beat Reporter
Joined: Apr 2003
Posts: 484 |
How rude of me! There is feedback here that I haven't acknowledged!
Maria, IsisLnC and Laura: thank you all.
Chris
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