Lois & Clark Forums Forums Fan Fiction Lois & Clark Fanfic FDK: "A Long Time In Coming" (part 2 of 2)

So, what do you think of the second half?

Very nice story. I'm glad they had to tell Ellen and Sam. Well written family dynamics. I guess the baby is small because of its high molecular density? Since a Kryptonian year and an Earth year wouldn't be the same number of hours, is it just chance it was a year to the day?
The delivery scene was true to life.
Nice story.

Artemis

Very sweet. Laura

Twelve months?

LOL!

Posting as I read, so I don't forget what I wanted to say...

Go Jonathan! That conversation in the kitchen is great. He makes a lot of good points, and I really like the fact that it's him saying it. Martha tends to get a lot more attention, so it's nice to see Jonathan take the lead.

OTOH, this line confused me:

It's true that Lois sleeping with Superman isn't far from the truth. It's also true that the tabloids seem to have a tendency of suggesting (at least somewhat inaccurately) that Lois is having an affair with Superman. I'm not quite sure that having both points linked in the same sentence like that works, though.

Was about to call you on Lois lying to her parents, and then Sam corrected himself. <G> I like it.

lol! Love that line. A watched baby never... uhm... boils? No... uhm... delivers? ... Something like that.

[quote]“I don’t think writing “no baby” on all of the days between the due date and today’s date will help, either.”{/quote]

LOL!

Ooo, and then Lois's first words of motherly advice! That's great!

Hee! Love Clark's addition to that, too.

Gotta love poor befuddled Klien's entrance, too. I didn't see that coming, but I loved it!

Clark leaving makes (some) sense, but I like him going back (especially with Jonathan convincing him) even better.

(BTW, is there a reason he's not using his powers to monitor the baby? Afraid of what X-ray vision might do? Hearing not that useful, after all?)

6 lbs isn't that small. On the smaller end of the normal spectrum, I think, but not abnormally small, especially not when Lois herself is often described as "petite."

lol, Martha has spandex ready for the kid, huh?

Oh my. Naming him David because they expect he'll be taking on supervillains? Very funny, but also slightly disturbing. Not something I'd want to have hanging over my head as I grow up...

Love that last line. Perfect ending.

Nice story, Sarah! (And have I mentioned lately that it's good to see you around again?)

Paul

great part...great story.



David, I like the name.

12 Months Dear God, poor Lois, I had enough with 9 months in my 2 pregnancies. :rolleyes:

Karla

That was sweet. However, I have learned to really dislike Ellen Lane. She'll eventually leak it.

Yay, you're posting! I'm so glad because I think you did a great job on this story. (Says Kathy the BR. )

You already know how happy I was with it, so I'll just respond to a couple of the comments.

It is when the pregnancy lasted for 12 months, LOL!

And for the record, I had five ultrasounds with my first pregnancy, and never found out the sex of the baby before she was born. The early ones were done too early to tell, and by the later ones, the techs saw in our file that we were electing not to find out. But I have definitely had friends who wanted to know, but couldn't, because the baby was lying wrong. Murphy's Law, I guess.

So anyway, that part of the story didn't raise any eyebrows for me.

Great job, Sarah! I'm enjoying reading the feedback since I enjoyed the story so much myself.

Kathy

Sarah

A wonderful story! I thoroughly enjoyed it.

Tricia

You know we'll be expecting more stories from you, don't you?

A nice story Well done, Sarah! Good to see your writing again... (and I believe you have "Lois and that cat" still pending, no? <--- not so subtle nag)

I loved the idea. It's original and very well handled with! Kudos!

I kinda have trouble with Jonathan giving Clark and Lois that speech... but it might just be because, as Paul said, Martha is usually the one attracting all the attention. And, when you get to think about it, it's not that strange for Jonathan, after all. (Not making sense? Sorry.)

Anyway. It was excellent, and I'm looking forward to your next story!
See ya,
AnnaBtG.

Thanks for all your comments, everyone!

To respond to a few specific things people brought up:

Artemis, the baby wasn't small because of high molecular density... although six pounds isn't small, the baby is on the smaller side because he was actually slightly premature, by Kryptonian standards. For the purposes of my story, I decided that a Kryptonian pregnancy lasts about the equivalent of fifteen months of Earth time, and so a half-and-half pregnancy is in-between. And as to the exact day... that was merely chance (and for the fun of it).

Paul, as for Clark not using his powers to monitor the baby's progress, I think it's more that he's very disturbed and anxious, and he's simply not thinking that way. Besides, I know enough men who are horrified at the thought of watching the baby actually come out, much less watching the baby's progress through the birth canal... Clark is really too anxious about Lois's safety and the pain she's going through to be interested in using his powers to see the baby early, unless perhaps if there had been some sort of worry about whether the baby was okay.

And as for the name David? Well, I wasn't so much as thinking of David versus Goliath being similar to David versus the supervillains, but just that David is a strong, kingly name... and it also happens to be the name I want for my son (in the potential future), so I loaned it to Lois.

I always thought that, while Martha is a more lovable and fascinating character in some ways, Jonathan was really the moral framework of the family. I didn't choose to have Jonathan give the speech because I didn't think Martha would agree with it, but she does tend to be a little bit more likely to let people figure things out on their own. But the truth is, I wasn't planning on anything of that sort at *all* originally. I'm not sure why, but Jonathan just ran away as a character and insisting on lecturing Lois and Clark, because he'd had enough of sitting back and watching them do something he thought was wrong. It wasn't until after he went off on that tangent that I added in some of the earlier stuff with Lois and her mother and wrote a revelation scene for Sam and Ellen.

Several people who read this story thought I might be planning to accompany it with an "announcement." Unfortunately, any such rumors are completely without basis (do I sound Hollywood enough?). The idea for the story came to me while rereading "The Other Boleyn Girl," a truly fantastic book by Philippa Gregory, in preparation for a book discussion I was doing on it. Pregnancy and having sons are major issues in the book, because a woman's worth in the 16th century was largely based on who she married and whether she had healthy sons. Also, there was a pregnancy that at first appeared to stretch on into the 10th and 11th months, until it became clear that it was a "phantom pregnancy," and that led me to the idea for Lois.

Anyway, thanks everybody for reading the story and for your wonderful comments! I really appreciate the encouragement (as shown by the fact that I'm already starting on something else).

Sarah - fantastic!! As always!! Jonathan was right in taking off on you - Ellen and Sam needed to know by that point. Hopefully, Ellen will maintain control over that little secret.

And - Ugh - I can't imagine pregnant for a whole year!!!! *shudder* 8 months is too long imo! 9 borders on cruelty, but 12!!!!!

Carol [whose pregnancies always cause considerable pain, but who forgets it the second she sees the baby and then wants another one ]

Hi,

Just read both part.

Beautiful story!

MAF

Hi Sarah,

I've been away on holiday and just caught up with this story.

I very much enjoyed it and thought you handled the family relationships well.

There was some lovely dialogue between Lois and Clark, and I too liked the fact that it was Jonathan that set them straight this time around.

Yours Jenni