I call myself "the Great Author of the Universe" and what happens in the lives of my characters hinge on how much they keep me interested.
Don't believe me? Read my current nfic.
“*Written out*, a Kryptonian saying, when someone’s life functions have ceased for no reason.” Zara explained. “It means the Great Author has removed them from the story of the universe.”
“It’s um, Kryptonian religion, Lois,” Clark muttered. “Don’t ask for details.”