Lois & Clark Forums Forums Fan Fiction Lois & Clark Fanfic FDK: Steel Knights-Final

Hi,

Great story.

MAF

Good job! I liked this Bruce Wayne and Superman story. Laura

I agree, that was good, thank you.

alrightey here's the author checking in!....

buncha points to make----first of all, I gotta say again that especially in certain sections, "Kmer" (spelling???) deserves co-author credit, pretty much, especially when Clark is explaining to Bruce at the end what happened when he went to look for Lois. She fixed several gaffes and sharpened the focus on what Clark thinks about the situation.

second! I wrote this, like, ten years ago. I've seen MAYBE the equivalent of one season of superman, so my info isn't.....well, right! for example, in my version of the story, you don't see blue lights coming outa Clark's eyes when he's looking through something. So some things are different. and the stuff about how much kryptonite is around? totally made up. blind guess. no clue. just stuck something in. and if anyone can think of another "embarrassing" thing along the lines of resplendent/regular man type stuff, I'd prefer to take out the red kryptonite example, because it isn't the same. it was a threat from another angle.

other bits and comments to explain/respond to---when luthor strapped the "special little box" to clark, a side of it was held open with duct tape, so the kryp was actually touching him, pretty much. this was a bit that was fixed by kmer. I had no idea about the proximity to kryptonite when I wrote this---I just took a guess, and she spotted that and suggested a solution.

Clark had power after the building collapsed, but not much. he could only do "blunt trauma" type stuff. again, this is "fuzzy math" or "fuzzy superman" stuff---when I wrote this, I wasn't clear on the details and didn't care--I write only for my own entertainment! I consider it a favor that this was allowed to be posted here, because not only are important strategy details like that probably innacurate, it's also a Batman story, really. Even though you don't see one second of it through Bruce's eyes, it's a batman story, and here it is on a superman website. so this is, like, you guys/the administrators being nice and allowing something else in. thanks! but again, when I wrote it, I didn't care much about the accuracy--I just wanted to entertain myself. but here it is on this web site now, and since that is the case, some things needed to be corrected. and I'm sure there are still more flaws in it. for that matter, why didn't batman just tell Lois "RUN FOR IT!" when he got her outa the building???? why get in the friggin car? what the #&%%????? anyway.....so there are definitely still mistakes in it...

I'm babbling....and I'm not done yet.....

Luthor dead? i'm not sure....but I ain't doing a sequel with a gruesome resurrection scene, that's for sure. which means he's still out there, though, and now, he Knows About Clark/Superman.... maybe we should have batman kick the info out of his head???.....he is a trained hypnotist, but knowing luthor, he'll weasle out of it somehow.

why is clark nervous when he goes to wayne enterprises and suddenly finds bruce? honey, they're both nervous. this is one thing I wanted to capture in this story---first, the shock of encountering this black monster for the first time and you have no clue, and second, how would you feel if you walked into your office and there was an alien from another planet waiting for you? they both have hidden identities, and they're both just a little bit uncertain: "Ok, I know who he is, but he knows who I am! Is he gonna....play nice? not tell anyone?" it's a shock, and pretty frightening, when you've got so much to lose. Both of them have a lot to lose.

oh---ps--it was mentioned at the start of the story that Lois Doesn't Know. she doesn't know he is superman in this story. looking back at how I worded it, though, it wasn't very clear. sowwy!

on bruce wayne being a bit insecure next to SUPERMAN----wouldn't you be? S is 24 by 7, world wide, natural disaster, practically indestructible, huge! batman works on a much more intimate scale. I mention the plots/characters of the other batman movies, but only to save me the trouble of coming up with a track record for batman. In my version of his story, there are no colorfully costumed villains---it's more like crime scene investigation. if a hurricane was going on, he couldn't do anything. superman would have a measureable impact on it. in one of the comics apparently bruce says of superman "He's the best at what he does, but I'm the best at what I do". they both work on different scales, and because of this bruce absolutely does not have the nerve to brag in front of Clark. besides, he's too busy attempting to wrap his brain around the fact that the name "Clark Kent" in the planet paper is actually S! don't think he's going to just say "Oh, really? interesting. so anyway...." I tried to capture that shock, and it was hard, because again, you don't see any of this from bruce's viewpoint, so you can only observe from clark's persepective. you only see bruce's reactions, and this is a person who is normally not demonstrative emotionally.

i really have to shuddup....

and nope, lois missed her chance to meet bruce! but I have a really funny short scene in mind where they meet, probably in metro, and it has to be after the wedding. He makes a showing only slightly better than when he meets chase meridian for the first time (in Forever, bashing down her door).


golly, i HAVE to shut up--

I liked it.

I liked the confusion and the nervousness. They're both a little insecure. Why not?

Thanks!

Helga

Congrats on finishing your story, Sileas. Great feeling, isn't it?

Now, that you have, don't forget that we'd be more than happy to welcome it to a permanent home at the Fanfic Archive ! So if you want to submit it, just send it along to me via the submissions form

And don't forget you can send it along to Annesplace too! She's just as hungry for new fic as we are.

LabRat
Editor-in-Chief
The Lois and Clark Fanfic Archive

....oh, i dunno if it's finished..... ) , and then Fix It. Finally. Once And For All. and then find a decent title for the thing. like i said, i suk at titles. and THEN upload it!

too many smilies. message terminated. hee!

Lol, Sileas. Not a big crossover fan, but have to say I love your response posts <g>

Keep writing!

c

I've been reading this on the sly, Sileas, and not commenting - not being a Batman fan, I didn't think it was my type of story, and yet... and yet I do like your humour and the observations in the story. You make Batman more human than he can seem sometimes, and I like that.

For someone who hasn't seen much Lois and Clark, you write them well. I did like the way you started with Lois, and the way she so did not want to do the Bruce Wayne interview. I guess she's had her fill of billionaires after Lex, right?

Just an observation, by the way, since you mention that you are going to make some changes before submitting to the Archive (which you must do, by the way! Did you know that you're eligible for Best New Author in the Kerth Awards ?). This story is set towards the end of Season 2 of Lois and Clark. By then, Lois and Clark were dating - not without frustrations, because Lois didn't know and didn't understand why Clark was forever rushing off. So she sort of dated someone else and he got jealous and it was all rather fraught.

Anyway, the reason I mention this is that, while I know you didn't set out to write a relationship story, you could maybe just add a line or two here and there to indicate the state of their relationship - ie that they were more than colleagues, more than friends at this stage. Perhaps Clark feels guilty about hiding the stuff about Bruce and Batman from her. Perhaps each of them is more worried about the other when they're trapped by Luthor because they're in love, even if they haven't told each other. Maybe they were looking forward to a romantic dinner on one of their evenings in Gotham - after all, they're away from their usual routine and they can both have free time in the evenings.

Just a suggestion! Do keep writing - we want to see more from you.


Wendy

thankee kindly! I do try to do that. I know Clark is the alien, but more than once in my writing (not just this story) I use the word "alien" to describe batman or the car, but really, he's human. I'm working on another batman story, probably not one for posting on here because there's not enough superman in it to warrant posting here, but in it, the knee is still plaguing him, and I have him go see his M.D., Leslie Tompkins, and she and bruce decide to call in an orthopedist, and they end up starting him on Hyalgan injections, a therapy used for nasty cases of arthritis. (can you tell i'm in the medical field? ). I do get quite the kick out of bringing out the human side. Thanks for commenting on this!

and, since i haven't yet figgered out how to do multiple quote wizardry in my posts like maria does, i'm just gonna refer to stuff...

as for her having had her fill of billionaires after Lex---see? an observation made by someone who has seen the whole series to someone who wrote a story with info that is, at best, spotty. I just bought myself the first season and I see a pic in the packaging where she's in a wedding dress next to lex (I presume) in a tux, and oh my goodness she actually WAS on top of marrying him and I didn't know that...... I never would have known that. snazzy observation. I just made up her distaste of the rich. made it up outa the blue. I just needed her to not be the person who interviews him. in reality, aside from lex, I believe a reporter of her status wouldn't care one way or the other. nothing would intimidate her. she's one of the best reporters in the nation. #%@* yes, she could take on Bruce Wayne The Billionaire in an interview and run him ragged.

as for their relationship.....yeah, something more needs to be in there, but it's hard to find a place to bring this out. she doesn't know he's superman, and they apparently have kissed because it's mentioned when she is giving him CPR....I was more clear on it when I was writing this ten years ago. what I'd really like to do is wait until I see much more of the series before I really correct it. she is more emotionally attached to S in this story, but I think it's slowly, slowly just starting to swing around in the other direction, just beginning to nudge here. You're right---it does need to be clarified. But I do know what my weaknesses are: romance, plot, and bad guys. and when I say weaknesses, I mean idiot all thumbs can't-hit-the-broadside-of-a-planet weakness, not like chocolate being a weakness. the second season comes out in january, and i'll probably buy that, but there's the issue of not having a tv or dvd player (long story, just moved out, waiting for the parents to realize they need to be in a nursing home, they start ditching their three TVs, three vcrs, two dvd players, I don't need to buy one)....sowanyway! get the second season and watch that and the first one, and that will give me much clearer direction on how to play it.

I've got one more story up my sleeve I could put on this website, and that's probably going to be it. I'm a batman writer, not lois and clark. I have big time respect for the series, and when I write batman, if L or C show up, you know who my cast is, but.... I just got a backwards engine, i guess. sowwy! but this other one will be an explanation for how the lakes got The Car in the ep don't tug on superman's cape (why did they call it that?), and what happened when these items were auctioned off/returned to their rightful owners.....

dang it, my comments are even longer than the stories I write. FOOMP! (sound of cork being inserted)

oh, and ps, though I haven't read all the new stories for this year, my vote for best new author HAS to be the person who wrote the cheese of the month club story. she stomps over all. winner. blue ribbon. period. paragraph. end of story. so there.

Yup, Groobie's good, but so is David and so are you! So get this story tidied up - don't worry if it's not perfect; after all, no story is! - and get it off to the archive. Even if you don't win, picking up a nomination (if you do) can't be bad!


Wendy

I was browsing around and noticed your question, Sileas. I haven't had time to read your story, or any story for that matter , but it looks intriguing! I've always liked Batman.

Anyway, it's a bit off topic, so I made a separate thread . Hopefully, it answers your question at least a little bit. In short, DTOSC is a popular American expression, and the L&C writers often liked to be clever and witty when coming up with episode titles.

Sara

fffffffffffffPOP! (sound of cork being removed)

alrightey!

(why do I always start posts like that?)....

ahem. while daydreaming on my job today (pretty good, because it involves translating from complete gibberish to understandable and even polished medical records, AKA medical transcription....)

so anyway! while daydreaming (slow day), i have figgered out where I wanna put in a scene to fix the bit that...um....wendymr said. just the ticket. it'll not only fix that but it'll also fix a scene that i've never been very satisfied with---the very tippy top last ending bit. not in love with it right now. it just feels kinda cold and abrupt. so! that'll fix that puppy.

to be eligible for that award, does it have to be in the archive? or just on here?

and i figgered out---I don't need to watch the show to get a better feel for where L&C were in their relationship---I can just read scripts! assuming that what was in the script was reasonably close to what they filmed....can anyone suggest one or two eps that seem to fill the bill? it's gotta be after The First Kiss but before he proposes. wendy (i think?) said towards the end of season two.

yeah, i'm envious of their ep titles, but i'm envious of ANY title. like i said, i suk at it. maybe i'll just call it the cheese of the month---no, wait, that's taken.....meh. i'll probably just leave it like it is.

Hey Sileas

I think if you set it any time between The Phoenix and Lucky Leon you'll be okay if you don't want them to be actually dating - Clark asks her out in The Phoenix and she says yes, but they don't actually go on their date for a few weeks - in Lucky Leon. If you want them to be newly dating, then anywhere around Lucky Leon, Resurrection, Tempus Fugitive or Target Jimmy Olsen would do - but then, Dan Scardino was getting in their way.

Their first real kiss was at the end of Lucky Leon, but they had kissed before that - as a ruse twice, and to say goodbye in Man of Steel Bars when Clark thought he was leaving Metropolis. So you don't have to have it after their real kiss as a couple if you don't want to.

Oh, and to be eligible for the Kerths, the story should be on the Archive. But that process is pretty painless.


Wendy