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Hack from Nowheresville
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Hack from Nowheresville
Joined: Jul 2005
Posts: 247 |
I really enjoyed that. Lois' rants even made me laugh out loud a couple of times. Clark's introspection and Lois' dialogue rang true to me. I liked the references to the Pheremone spray and grinned at Clark's need to take laps in the Arctic over the memory of Lois' dance. And of course we have the revelation. I take it that's just part one of a multi-chapter fic, right? Glad you've decided to post! I look forward to seeing what happens when Mad Dog Lane springs back into consciousness. 
Chris
"Superman is a guy who's seen wonders we'll never see and Lois is to him, one of those wonders."
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Posts: 5,797
Nobel Peace Prize Winner
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Nobel Peace Prize Winner
Joined: Aug 2005
Posts: 5,797 |
Ha! That was a wonderful first fic, Marcy! So funny! What a revelation story! Ah, Clark, you should never wear white shirts. If Lois is the only one who's ever spotted your Superman suit through your white shirt, you really are lucky! And I side with Incognito here - when do we get the sequel?
Ann
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Top Banana
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Top Banana
Joined: Sep 2004
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What the others said.  I really enjoyed reading this because of the breathless sound of Lois's innner babble. And also because of some wonderful phrases, like the pieces slammed together like a car wreck at an intersection. You've got Perry dead on too. You're off to a great start.  c
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Pulitzer
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Pulitzer
Joined: Apr 2003
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Wow, really good for a first timer<g> I hope you post more. make the sections a little longer too! Laura
Clark: “If we can be born in an instant, and die in an instant, why can’t we fall in love in an instant?”
Caroline's "Stardust"
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Merriwether
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Merriwether
Joined: Dec 2004
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Welcome Marcy! Great first fic. I'm really enjoying it.
Jackie
Superman: I hear you've been looking for me.
Lois: All my life.
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Kerth
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Kerth
Joined: Dec 2003
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I always wondered about those white dress shirts! It's always good to see new writers. Susan
You can find my stories as Groobie on the nfic archives and Susan Young on the gfic archives. In other words, you know me as Groobie.
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Hack from Nowheresville
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Hack from Nowheresville
Joined: Jun 2003
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That’s a really great fic 
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Pulitzer
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Pulitzer
Joined: Apr 2003
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Welcome, Kent28! This is very cute - and, as Carol said, you've got the characterisations spot on. Lois's babble, insistent demands and relationship with Clark is just right.  And I loved the revelation. But... what next? What's she going to say to him? Is he going to escape unscathed? I think you need to get back here and post some more.  Wendy
Just a fly-by! *waves*
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Hack from Nowheresville
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Hack from Nowheresville
Joined: Nov 2003
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 Thanks so much everyone for the feedback. I was really relieved that someone else actually laughed at some of the scenes too, since my humor is sometimes a little different. Well, I have no clue what I am doing but I will try to post more as I get it written. It may be a little while, since I can be slow going and with the holidays approaching. The only time I can ever seem to get online or on the computer usually is when everyone else is asleep around here. During the day I am just too busy. So please be patient with me. And I am definitely open to constructive criticism. Well, thanks. Marcy
(Elrond's blessing at the departure of the company from Rivendell)
"Farewell, and may the blessing of Elves and Men and all Free Folk go with you.
May the stars shine upon your faces!"
-Lord of the Rings, J.R.R. Tolkien
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Top Banana
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Top Banana
Joined: Oct 2003
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Okay, girly...let me get this straight. This is your first time posting and it was fabulous and then you tell us that you may be a little slow posting. Well, that is a major NO-NO! You cannot get fans hooked then say that you may be a little slow posting. Hurry up. Get back here! 
I'm a firm believer in the fact that God doesn't put any more on us than we can bear. He does however make us come to Jesus every so often.
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Pulitzer
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Pulitzer
Joined: Apr 2003
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Hi, Interesting start.
Maria D. Ferdez.
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Don't like Luthor, unfinished, untitled and crossover story, and people that promises and don't deliver. I'm getting choosy with age.
MAF
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Hack from Nowheresville
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Hack from Nowheresville
Joined: Oct 2005
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Wow!! Nice first. I loved the fainting part...hehe.
Thanks, Judy
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Merriwether
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Merriwether
Joined: Jun 2003
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Welcome, Kent28! This is very cute - and, as Carol said, you've got the characterisations spot on. Lois's babble, insistent demands and relationship with Clark is just right.
And I loved the revelation. But... what next? What's she going to say to him? Is he going to escape unscathed? I think you need to get back here and post some more.
Wendy I can't say it better!
I've converted to lurk-ism... hopefully only temporary.
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Boards Chief Administrator Emeritus Nobel Peace Prize Winner
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Boards Chief Administrator Emeritus Nobel Peace Prize Winner
Joined: Apr 2003
Posts: 9,362 |
I've decided insomnia is a wonderful thing. <g> You get to catch up with so much you've been trying to read. What a wonderful debut, Marcy! You've captured the characters so perfectly, I can hear them clearly in my head. Like others, I just adored the Lois babble and you have a lovely, amusing way of phrasing things throughout that made me Off to catch up with part two! This is so much fun. Thanks for sharing. Aren't we just the luckiest fandom to still have so much great, new talent after the show's been off air for so long?  LabRat
Athos: If you'd told us what you were doing, we might have been able to plan this properly.
Aramis: Yes, sorry.
Athos: No, no, by all means, let's keep things suicidal.
The Musketeers
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Beat Reporter
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Beat Reporter
Joined: Dec 2004
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Welcome Marcy! I really love this! What a way to debut, seriously! Ditto what everyone's already said. AWESOME revelation and characterization! Okay, have to comment on this, I especially loved it: And to make things even more difficult for him, it seemed his libido had no sense of proper timing as memories of Lois' dance of the seven veils would spring to mind at odd occasions, most uncomfortably when she went into full Lane rant mode. That is so cute and sweet!!! I think I see a part 2 posted!! AH! Off to check it out! ~NICOLE
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