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#27935 02/19/06 10:51 AM
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Opinions, please.

I could have cut out the whole part about the guy being dogcatcher and all and made it a microfiction story. I thought it added something but it may be a distraction.

The web comic that gave me the idea is cute. I could have summarized it but I wouldn't have done as good a job as the comic strip did, just see the link.

R.C.

#27936 02/19/06 04:50 PM
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Hack from Nowheresville
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thumbsup

#27937 02/19/06 11:13 PM
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Beat Reporter
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Can you go and edit the long line of ===s. Since that is a solid line and can't wordwrap none of the lines wordwrap shorter than that. You have to scroll sideways for each line.

#27938 02/20/06 01:12 AM
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Ditto. That would make the reading easier. wink Cute story. thumbsup


"My wife's love is what unites Krypton and Earth in my heart. Without it, without her, I truly would be in hell."

~ Superman: Man of Tomorrow #15
#27939 02/20/06 02:59 AM
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I've edited it. Let me know if there's still a problem. smile

LabRat smile



Athos: If you'd told us what you were doing, we might have been able to plan this properly.
Aramis: Yes, sorry.
Athos: No, no, by all means, let's keep things suicidal.


The Musketeers
#27940 02/20/06 04:54 AM
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Cute, RC. I enjoyed the way all the little things built up to being important in the end. I liked the dog catcher, actually. Didn't seem to jar with me or be particularly superfluous.

Remember to send this one along to the Archive, you hear? laugh

LabRat smile



Athos: If you'd told us what you were doing, we might have been able to plan this properly.
Aramis: Yes, sorry.
Athos: No, no, by all means, let's keep things suicidal.


The Musketeers
#27941 02/20/06 07:17 AM
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I like it, Rogue Chip. As Labrat said, that thing about the dog catcher was particularly cute. But I really appreciated the way you brought East Timor, Timor-Leste, into your story. East Timor became independent from Indonesia just a few years ago, which felt like a huge relief at that time. I think it's great the way your story suggests that an ordinary man from a small and poor country could start from scratch and, via jobs like dog catcher, could work himself all the way to the absolute top, to the position of ambassador the United Nations. And I really liked the way you put Clark, Lois and Perry in this story, too.

And by the way, I haven't forgotten the great story about Superman's daughter that you wrote some time before Christmas, and which was uploaded to the Archive just the other week. It's great to have you back with a new story! thumbsup

Ann

#27942 02/20/06 05:42 PM
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I wrote up and added the microfiction version to the story.

Microfiction is generally defined as 300 words or fewer. I've never managed to write anything significant that short before.

I'm interested what people think of this version.

#27943 02/22/06 01:53 PM
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Hi,

Great story. clap


Maria D. Ferdez.
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Don't like Luthor, unfinished, untitled and crossover story, and people that promises and don't deliver. I'm getting choosy with age.
MAF
#27944 02/22/06 08:54 PM
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Rogue Chip

A great story! smile1 I enjoyed it immensely.

Tricia cool


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