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Feedback goes here
Last edited by bakasi; 11/05/20 02:24 PM. Reason: Changed title
It's never too dark to be cool.
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Joined: Jun 2004
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Pulitzer
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Pulitzer
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Life isn't a support system for writing. It's the other way around.
- Stephen King, from On Writing
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Joined: Jun 2006
Posts: 2,628 Likes: 42
Pulitzer
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Thank you very much, Terry.
It's never too dark to be cool.
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Posts: 3,784 Likes: 28
Pulitzer
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I'm sitting at my desk, staring into space. This is a rare occasion, but truth be told, I’m stuck. Try as I might, the article I'm working on just doesn’t seem right. I've been typing and editing for the past three hours or so. I've leaned back and reread the whole thing, I’ve changed the angle several times, I’ve stopped and written something else. Nothing seems to help. The article on my computer screen is still too long and too complicated. I’d probably lose the majority of my readers before I have even managed to get my point across. I lean back again and heave a sigh. Wistfully, I look at the picture that sits on my desk, right next to the computer screen. What an opening! This shows that after all the investigating and stakeouts, the story has to be written and done in such a way as to draw the readers into the article. It is what all writers strive to do, either for a newspaper article of a novel. Speaking of which, if anyone wants to understand about the difficulties of writing, I recommend watching Finding Forrester a film done in 2000 and the late great Sean Connery as the title character. What a shame that in all the articles recently written about Mr. Connery this film is never mentioned. Portraying such vulnerability on his part took a tremendous amount of humility and courage. Just to be on the safe side, I push back my chair and decide that a nice cup of newsroom coffee might help me solve my dilemmas, both the emotional and the verbal. I reach for the mug of stale coffee that is still left and pour it onto the plant on my desk. With a pang of guilt, I realize it looks rather sickly. Good heavens! That poor plant has suffered so many indignities from Lois and newsroom coffee. No wonder its appears is down in the mouth! "No reason to keep everybody from working,” Perry barks, “Now, this party is over. There is a newspaper to write.” His stern gaze drifts through the newsroom until everyone but Jimmy and me has hurried back to work. Yup, this is how a newsroom is run! The audience claps as Charles King walks up to the stage. Tall and broad shouldered, he could have made quite an impression if it hadn't been for his haggard features and slumped shoulders. He leans onto a cane and drags his right leg after him in a heavy limp. As in the photo, thick frames, long black hair and a full grown beard hide most of his face. Oh good grief! What happened to Clark! The kiss that followed still takes my breath away, even if there is nothing left of it but a memory. It had been a moment of pure bliss. His hands on my body had been my every dream come true, or so I had thought. Making love to Superman had been exhilarating. Hovering above the bed, held by his strong arms, knowing that I was the one who got to kiss every inch of his body… This was such a great turn on that I just forgot about the few men before him. For weeks I’d walked on cloud nine, and I’d actually been so naïve to think that the dream would never end. What?!? My smile falters a little, but I quickly try to put it back into place. Most likely it’s not all that convincing. “Sure. You’re pretty busy right now, I guess. Working on your next novel or something. Just give me a call when you’ve got some spare time, will you? It’s still the same number.” I turn on my heels, then look back over my shoulder. “Goodbye, Clark. It was nice seeing you again.” I wave at him as I leave the book shop, almost running. Yikes! OK, Lois may be trying to walk away from Clark now, but like any good investigative reporter, she's going to track this story down! Bakasi, you have my complete and undivided attention...
Morgana
A writer's job is to think of new plots and create characters who stay with you long after the final page has been read. If that mission is accomplished than we have done what we set out to do, which is to entertain and hopefully educate.
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Joined: Jun 2006
Posts: 2,628 Likes: 42
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OK, Lois may be trying to walk away from Clark now, but like any good investigative reporter, she's going to track this story down! Bakasi, you have my complete and undivided attention... Just what I wanted to read! Thank you very much for your feedback, Morgana. I hope you'll like the rest as well.
It's never too dark to be cool.
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Joined: Jul 2014
Posts: 917 Likes: 2
Features Writer
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Features Writer
Joined: Jul 2014
Posts: 917 Likes: 2 |
Wow, what an amazing story so far!! You had me hooked after the first paragraph. And since I just now read it, I also had the pleasure of reading Chapter Two. The emotional and physical trauma Clark endured is definitely tissue-worthy. Your writing is very compelling, and I look forward to Chapter Three. Except that's listed as the final chapter, so I'm sure I'll have mixed emotions about this story ending. Maybe you could be enticed to continue this AU?
Cuidadora
"Honey, we didn't care if you were a Russian or a Martian... You were ours... and we weren't giving you to anybody." ~ Martha in Strange Visitor
"A love that risks nothing is worth nothing." ~ Jonathan in Big Girls Don't Fly
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Joined: Jun 2006
Posts: 2,628 Likes: 42
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Thanks for your encouraging feedback, cuidadora. I seriously hope you won't be having mixed feelings after that last chapter. I admit that this story could have been an epic fic. I decided against that. I hope you'll like this story nonetheless.
It's never too dark to be cool.
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Joined: Jan 2019
Posts: 1,007 Likes: 19
Top Banana
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Top Banana
Joined: Jan 2019
Posts: 1,007 Likes: 19 |
Wow, a very intense path they went down, and very possible with the minor alterations you implanted. I'm glad they're finally facing the truth and that it seems like they've both grown up a bit (which, considering how much time had passed....). Looking forward to more
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Joined: Aug 2009
Posts: 338
Beat Reporter
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Beat Reporter
Joined: Aug 2009
Posts: 338 |
Am enjoying this story with it's unique take on Clark's trip to New Krypton. I look forward to part 3 but will be sad to see the story come to a close so soon.
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Joined: Jun 2006
Posts: 2,628 Likes: 42
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Thanks for your feedback Blueowl and Elizabeth. I'm glad you're enjoying this story.
It's never too dark to be cool.
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Joined: Aug 2009
Posts: 338
Beat Reporter
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Beat Reporter
Joined: Aug 2009
Posts: 338 |
Just read part 3. Wow! What a wonderful job you did with this story, a bit of a roller coaster on the emotions towards the end... deserves a sequel! Thanks for writing such wonderful tales.
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Kerth
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Kerth
Joined: Dec 2005
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Well done, a very engaging tale.
Framework4
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I told you it was gonna be good! I didn't catch this on the beta read, but this time I noticed that Clark's physical improvement (and the gradual return of his powers) came about when he and Lois reconnected. She is truly his other half, just as he is truly her other half. They really are stronger together than either one is alone. And now both of them can smile more. Ah, if only Real Life worked out that well.
Life isn't a support system for writing. It's the other way around.
- Stephen King, from On Writing
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Joined: Jun 2006
Posts: 2,628 Likes: 42
Pulitzer
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Pulitzer
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If Real Life was so simple, we wouldn't need fanfic or other fiction to indulge in, would we? Thank you all so much for the kind feedback. You're making my day.
It's never too dark to be cool.
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Joined: Jan 2019
Posts: 1,007 Likes: 19
Top Banana
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Top Banana
Joined: Jan 2019
Posts: 1,007 Likes: 19 |
Well this was a happy ending Glad they saw the light before it was too late. I wonder how long it'll be before Superman returns, though now that he has a daughter, maybe it's better for him to hold off a bit and really begin living again (with Lois). Anyway, good story ^_^
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Joined: Jul 2014
Posts: 917 Likes: 2
Features Writer
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Features Writer
Joined: Jul 2014
Posts: 917 Likes: 2 |
Excellent story with a beautiful ending. I think I didn't explain my previous comment well. When I say that I have mixed feelings about a story ending, it is a big compliment. I will miss your writing, and while this story is at a stopping point, it also could easily have one or more sequels. If that's not in your plans, I accept and honor that. And if in the future your muse has a inspiration, I'm sure I'm not the only one in line to read it.
Cuidadora
"Honey, we didn't care if you were a Russian or a Martian... You were ours... and we weren't giving you to anybody." ~ Martha in Strange Visitor
"A love that risks nothing is worth nothing." ~ Jonathan in Big Girls Don't Fly
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Joined: Jun 2006
Posts: 2,628 Likes: 42
Pulitzer
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Pulitzer
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Thank you very much for the compliments. I don't think there will be a sequel to this story. I promised Morgana to finish a story that has been sitting on my hard drive for quite some time now. And my muse is already busy mulling over another plot bunny that begs me to be written. So maybe, just maybe you're going to see more of my writing in the foreseeable future...
It's never too dark to be cool.
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Joined: Apr 2010
Posts: 3,784 Likes: 28
Pulitzer
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“The rest pretty much happened as I wrote it. The war turned from bad to worse. Nor almost won the upper hand until I eventually managed to defeat him. I was badly wounded and almost didn’t survive. Zara died in childbirth after Ching was killed in the final battle.” Clark’s expression turns sad. I can tell by the look on his face that while he might not have been in love with Zara, she had been a good friend. Poor Clark, Zara and Ching. Life on New Krypton was not happy for any of them. Perhaps it would have been better if they had not come to Earth to get Clark. His appearance only caused more disruption rather than assisting them as they had hoped. “In the end, I had only one ally left. Trey realized before I did that I would be fighting a losing battle. He urged me to leave. He refused to sacrifice my life for a world that was so obviously incapable of embracing peace.” Clark turns around to face me again. “Sara and I owe him our lives.” In the end, Trey had more nobility than all of them. I don’t want to watch Lois from afar when she is in love with someone else, even if that someone is me. This is nuts! No kidding! How will this all end?
Morgana
A writer's job is to think of new plots and create characters who stay with you long after the final page has been read. If that mission is accomplished than we have done what we set out to do, which is to entertain and hopefully educate.
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Joined: Jun 2006
Posts: 2,628 Likes: 42
Pulitzer
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Thanks for your feedback, Morgana. I hope you'll like the last part.
It's never too dark to be cool.
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Joined: Apr 2010
Posts: 3,784 Likes: 28
Pulitzer
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Thank you very much for the compliments. I don't think there will be a sequel to this story. I promised Morgana to finish a story that has been sitting on my hard drive for quite some time now. And my muse is already busy mulling over another plot bunny that begs me to be written. So maybe, just maybe you're going to see more of my writing in the foreseeable future... Wow! Am I ever glad this story is completed and did not languish in your hard drive! So much is packed into this final chapter... I look at the journal again and continue to flip through the pages. After that first night I went to Luthor and told him that I couldn't marry him. He was furious, and I caught a glimpse of the man behind the suave exterior. Luthor said that I made a mistake and that I would come to see reason. It sounded like a threat. I have no doubt seeing the real Lex Luthor must have been frightening. John Shea's portrayal of the billionaire at time could be quite chilling. Here with a few sentences his menace is brought completely to the surface. You are an excellent writer, this fandom is happy to have you here.
Last edited by Morgana; 11/22/20 05:31 PM.
Morgana
A writer's job is to think of new plots and create characters who stay with you long after the final page has been read. If that mission is accomplished than we have done what we set out to do, which is to entertain and hopefully educate.
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