Lois & Clark Fanfic Message Boards
Previous Thread
Next Thread
Print Thread
Page 1 of 6 1 2 3 4 5 6
#288860 05/08/21 10:14 PM
Joined: Feb 2021
Posts: 440
Likes: 18
T
Toomi8 Offline OP
Beat Reporter
OP Offline
Beat Reporter
T
Joined: Feb 2021
Posts: 440
Likes: 18
Summary: Set during 'House of Luthor,' beginning as the wedding is stopped/interrupted, and Clark escapes the Kryptonite cage, this story takes a different turn.

I always thought Clark recovered awfully quickly from being inside the cage for so long. In GGOH, his parents had to help him inside after a short exposure, and when he grasps the Kryptonite to throw it, you can hear a 'sizzling' as though it's burning his skin. Those experiences fueled this version of events.

I'm not completely sure on the etiquette for naming fics here. I found one in the archive from 2013 with the same title, and do have a backup title if it is considered poor taste to duplicate the title.

I've been sitting on this for about a year, at least this first chapter. It was written and then sat for a while, not sure where I wanted to take it as it seemed lonesome as a stand alone. Over the last several months, it's morphed into something more!

Part one is here

Last edited by Toomi8; 05/08/21 10:17 PM.
Joined: Jun 2006
Posts: 2,628
Likes: 42
Pulitzer
Online Content
Pulitzer
Joined: Jun 2006
Posts: 2,628
Likes: 42
There are several fics with similiar or even the same titles. I don't think that's a problem.

This was a nice start and a take on this episode that I haven't seen yet in quite this way. Usually, adaptions with Clark needing longer to recover from kryptonite exposure have him meet Lois pretty early on.

You've got me hooked. I'm eagerly waiting for the next installment.


It's never too dark to be cool. cool
Joined: Apr 2010
Posts: 3,784
Likes: 28
Pulitzer
Offline
Pulitzer
Joined: Apr 2010
Posts: 3,784
Likes: 28
Nicely done. thumbsup

Quote
Clark used that time to take stock of himself. His hands had burn marks on them from grasping the bars of the Kryptonite cage, as did his wrists, arms, and he had one particularly long burn down his right side from reaching for the key. With his powers gone, his Suit was no longer protected by his aura, so it too had scorch marks from the Kryptonite bars. He needed to escape, and find a disguise so he could get back home without anyone recognizing him. It wasn’t often he left home in the Suit without a change of clothes, but last night he had, never imagining the outcome. Escape first, he told himself. He could berate himself later, and find out how Luthor got hold of Kryptonite.

Since Kryptonite is radioactive, it makes perfect sense that it would cause burns on Superman's skin. The descriptions here cause the reader to actual feel those painful radioactive lesions. Brilliant touch about him leaving without his civilian clothing.

Quote
“I’ll stay here if one of you could go find Henderson.” Clark didn’t have the energy to run around and find him himself, and hoped that neither officer would question his strength at that moment. He was resisting the urge to sit, but the sun was now directly overhead the narrow alley they were in, and he was starting to feel stronger, the headache lessening, and his stomach had settled. Thankfully, the one officer left, and the one remaining was too busy trying to catch a glimpse of what was happening towards the street, to pay him any attention.


Sunlight is helping him to heal, but the exposure is not nearly long enough. Poor Clark! mecry

Quote
The dress pants were just long enough, but a bit big around the waist, and the long sleeved shirt, was the right length for his arms, but also, too large around the midsection. Thankfully, he found a belt, and added the sports coat. There was a pair of black slip on shoes, and a ball cap, which he pulled low over his face. He folded the suit and cape carefully, tucking his boots inside, wondering what to do with them. He couldn’t walk of the station carrying a tattered Superman suit! He quickly undid the belt, untucked the shirt, and stuffed the Suit underneath, moving it around until it sat on his waist. He grinned as he forced the zipper of the coat closed. No one would suspect who he was with a large belly, but he would have to keep the hat low. His face was too recognizable to go without it, and when he’d left the previous day, he hadn’t taken any of Clark’s belongings with him, including his glasses.

Henderson is no slouch, he will figure out that there is more to Clark's friendship with Superman than meets the eye. But in this crisis the laconic detective is the best person for him to turn to. Oh man a third identity! What a hoot!

I like this new angle of the aftereffects from long-term exposure to the Kryptonite cage. Looking forward to see where it will lead all of us.



Last edited by Morgana; 05/09/21 11:47 AM. Reason: Additional comments

Morgana

A writer's job is to think of new plots and create characters who stay with you long after the final page has been read. If that mission is accomplished than we have done what we set out to do, which is to entertain and hopefully educate.
Joined: Jan 2019
Posts: 1,007
Likes: 19
Top Banana
Offline
Top Banana
Joined: Jan 2019
Posts: 1,007
Likes: 19
Really enjoying this so far ^_^ I too often thought his recovery times seemed to be extremely inconsistent, but then so is his reactions to red kryptonite . . . Granted, I like the variety there, but anyway, looking forward to where you take this, especially with Henderson knowing Superman has been hurt.

Maybe reading this will help me finish up my own ending of House of Luthor that I started a few months ago, so thanks again for writing this laugh.

Joined: Jul 2014
Posts: 917
Likes: 2
Features Writer
Offline
Features Writer
Joined: Jul 2014
Posts: 917
Likes: 2
Glad you are undertaking this issue. I also thought that Clark's response to green kryptonite was inconsistent in the show. Glad to see another story dealing with the consequences of that cage in a more realistic scenario. I always wondered how Clark changed his clothes without his superpowers in that episode. It will be interesting to see how his absence from the street affects everyone else. Hopefully, he can beat the gang to his apartment and become Clark again before they arrive.

I also have a story that addresses this topic languishing unfinished on my drive. Minds thinking alike... lol


Cuidadora

"Honey, we didn't care if you were a Russian or a Martian... You were ours... and we weren't giving you to anybody." ~ Martha in Strange Visitor

"A love that risks nothing is worth nothing." ~ Jonathan in Big Girls Don't Fly

Joined: Feb 2021
Posts: 440
Likes: 18
T
Toomi8 Offline OP
Beat Reporter
OP Offline
Beat Reporter
T
Joined: Feb 2021
Posts: 440
Likes: 18
Originally Posted by bakasi
There are several fics with similiar or even the same titles. I don't think that's a problem.
Phew! I really preferred this title!

Quote
You've got me hooked. I'm eagerly waiting for the next installment.

Awesome! Thanks for commenting, and there will be more soon!
Originally Posted by Morgana
Nicely done. thumbsup

I like this new angle of the aftereffects from long-term exposure to the Kryptonite cage. Looking forward to see where it will lead all of us.

I can only say... wait and see!!! whistle

Originally Posted by Blueowl
Really enjoying this so far ^_^ I too often thought his recovery times seemed to be extremely inconsistent, but then so is his reactions to red kryptonite . . . Granted, I like the variety there, but anyway, looking forward to where you take this, especially with Henderson knowing Superman has been hurt.

Thanks for reading!

Quote
Maybe reading this will help me finish up my own ending of House of Luthor that I started a few months ago, so thanks again for writing this laugh.

Look forward to reading it hyper

Joined: Feb 2021
Posts: 440
Likes: 18
T
Toomi8 Offline OP
Beat Reporter
OP Offline
Beat Reporter
T
Joined: Feb 2021
Posts: 440
Likes: 18
Originally Posted by cuidadora
Glad you are undertaking this issue. I also thought that Clark's response to green kryptonite was inconsistent in the show. Glad to see another story dealing with the consequences of that cage in a more realistic scenario. I always wondered how Clark changed his clothes without his superpowers in that episode. It will be interesting to see how his absence from the street affects everyone else. Hopefully, he can beat the gang to his apartment and become Clark again before they arrive.

I also have a story that addresses this topic languishing unfinished on my drive. Minds thinking alike... lol

Thanks for reading!

Looking forward to reading your version smile

Joined: Jan 2009
Posts: 4,025
Pulitzer
Offline
Pulitzer
Joined: Jan 2009
Posts: 4,025
Hey Toomi8 wave

Very interesting take. I'm always intrigued by HOL stories and how they might differ. Do you have a posting schedule in mind?

Also, as others have mentioned don't worry about using the same title. It's done often. As long as it works for your fic then go for it. wink


~ Folc4evernaday

Jodi Picoult - You might not write well every day, but you can always edit a bad page. You can't edit a blank page.
https://loisclarktribute.com
Subscribe on YouTube
Joined: Feb 2021
Posts: 440
Likes: 18
T
Toomi8 Offline OP
Beat Reporter
OP Offline
Beat Reporter
T
Joined: Feb 2021
Posts: 440
Likes: 18
Originally Posted by folc4evernaday
Hey Toomi8 wave

Very interesting take. I'm always intrigued by HOL stories and how they might differ. Do you have a posting schedule in mind?

Also, as others have mentioned don't worry about using the same title. It's done often. As long as it works for your fic then go for it. wink

Hmmm.. hadn't really considered a schedule... I have a good chunk written, need to figure out how to split it into chapters, and was hoping to do one per week, more if I get further ahead.

And, thanks for reading!!! smile1

Last edited by Toomi8; 05/10/21 09:37 AM.
Joined: Jan 2009
Posts: 4,025
Pulitzer
Offline
Pulitzer
Joined: Jan 2009
Posts: 4,025
Originally Posted by Toomi8
Originally Posted by folc4evernaday
Hey Toomi8 wave

Very interesting take. I'm always intrigued by HOL stories and how they might differ. Do you have a posting schedule in mind?

Also, as others have mentioned don't worry about using the same title. It's done often. As long as it works for your fic then go for it. wink

Hmmm.. hadn't really considered a schedule... I have a good chunk written, need to figure out how to split it into chapters, and was hoping to do one per week, more if I get further ahead.

And, thanks for reading!!! smile1

Hey Toomi8 wave

So, typically when you have a multi-chapter fic. Typically your mid / epic-length fic it's a good practice to pick a day to establish as your posting schedule so readers know when to expect the next chapter. This helps readers know when to look for the next part and is helpful as an author to know when you need to have your chapter ready for posting. I usually will pick a day to post on for my epics either once a week or once every two weeks depending on RL and such. Common courtesy is to try and avoid posting at the same time as another author if possible to give them a chance to receive FDK and such. (Not required but just good manners/practice).

I hope that helps some with regard to posting schedules. wink


~ Folc4evernaday

Jodi Picoult - You might not write well every day, but you can always edit a bad page. You can't edit a blank page.
https://loisclarktribute.com
Subscribe on YouTube
Joined: Feb 2021
Posts: 440
Likes: 18
T
Toomi8 Offline OP
Beat Reporter
OP Offline
Beat Reporter
T
Joined: Feb 2021
Posts: 440
Likes: 18
Originally Posted by folc4evernaday
Hey Toomi8 wave

So, typically when you have a multi-chapter fic. Typically your mid / epic-length fic it's a good practice to pick a day to establish as your posting schedule so readers know when to expect the next chapter. This helps readers know when to look for the next part and is helpful as an author to know when you need to have your chapter ready for posting. I usually will pick a day to post on for my epics either once a week or once every two weeks depending on RL and such. Common courtesy is to try and avoid posting at the same time as another author if possible to give them a chance to receive FDK and such. (Not required but just good manners/practice).

I hope that helps some with regard to posting schedules. wink

Gotcha.

I have a weird job, with very strange highs and lows. While the last year has been one wild high, I'm about to enter an insanely busy period.... So, I'd like to try posting on Fridays, but it might be Monday's, or even the odd Saturday. It all depends on how crazy my week has been, which should settle in mid-July (please... I hope so...). Next time I'll think further ahead before beginning something right before I'm about to get my rear handed to me for a bit!!!!

Joined: Feb 2021
Posts: 440
Likes: 18
T
Toomi8 Offline OP
Beat Reporter
OP Offline
Beat Reporter
T
Joined: Feb 2021
Posts: 440
Likes: 18
Part 2 is posted!

Joined: Apr 2010
Posts: 3,784
Likes: 28
Pulitzer
Offline
Pulitzer
Joined: Apr 2010
Posts: 3,784
Likes: 28
Quote
He found the remote on the ground in the debris of the damaged barrels, and clicked the top button. When nothing happened, he tried the second button, and the glowing ceased. Henderson left with the remote, sending others down to the cellar to gather any evidence, and to arrange for someone to come look at the cage, an unspoken agreement between himself and the officer to never mention the green glow again.

Good explanation as to what happened to the Kryptonite cage. That fellow officer has got to be related to a clam for him to never mention what he and Henderson saw in the wine cellar.


Morgana

A writer's job is to think of new plots and create characters who stay with you long after the final page has been read. If that mission is accomplished than we have done what we set out to do, which is to entertain and hopefully educate.
Joined: Jan 2019
Posts: 1,007
Likes: 19
Top Banana
Offline
Top Banana
Joined: Jan 2019
Posts: 1,007
Likes: 19
Sweet. Glad Clark was able to call Henderson, and really glad Henderson has some people he can trust. Looking forward to what happens next and if anyone will connect Clark to Superman. ^_^

Joined: Feb 2021
Posts: 440
Likes: 18
T
Toomi8 Offline OP
Beat Reporter
OP Offline
Beat Reporter
T
Joined: Feb 2021
Posts: 440
Likes: 18
Originally Posted by Morgana
Good explanation as to what happened to the Kryptonite cage. That fellow officer has got to be related to a clam for him to never mention what he and Henderson saw in the wine cellar.

There's only so much a show can show in their time slot, giving us lots to work with! The end of HOL seemed to tie up super quickly, and I get that they were focused on the Lois/Clark relationship, but the Kryptonite cage seemed like such a large loose end. Thanks for reading!

Originally Posted by Blueowl
Sweet. Glad Clark was able to call Henderson, and really glad Henderson has some people he can trust. Looking forward to what happens next and if anyone will connect Clark to Superman. ^_^

smile Part 3 will be posted tomorrow, unless it keeps snowing and I'm sent home from work early, then it'll be tonight!

Joined: Jun 2006
Posts: 2,628
Likes: 42
Pulitzer
Online Content
Pulitzer
Joined: Jun 2006
Posts: 2,628
Likes: 42
Just realized that I didn't leave feedback, yet. It's intersting to see Henderson's perspective here. Of course I'm dying to know how poor Clark is doing. Waiting for tommorrow!!


It's never too dark to be cool. cool
Joined: Jul 2014
Posts: 917
Likes: 2
Features Writer
Offline
Features Writer
Joined: Jul 2014
Posts: 917
Likes: 2
Excellent chapter. I enjoyed reading Henderson's perspective. I'm wondering where Perry dropped off Jack and Jimmy, and if Clark's apartment, did he beat them there. Looking forward to more.

I do have one suggestion. You might consider placing a link to this comments thread at the end of each chapter, since at least for the first two you are posting in separate threads, and the second chapter has no link. That way, if the comments get separated from the story, it's easier for readers to find and leave comments.


Cuidadora

"Honey, we didn't care if you were a Russian or a Martian... You were ours... and we weren't giving you to anybody." ~ Martha in Strange Visitor

"A love that risks nothing is worth nothing." ~ Jonathan in Big Girls Don't Fly

Joined: Feb 2021
Posts: 440
Likes: 18
T
Toomi8 Offline OP
Beat Reporter
OP Offline
Beat Reporter
T
Joined: Feb 2021
Posts: 440
Likes: 18
Originally Posted by cuidadora
Excellent chapter. I enjoyed reading Henderson's perspective. I'm wondering where Perry dropped off Jack and Jimmy, and if Clark's apartment, did he beat them there. Looking forward to more.

I do have one suggestion. You might consider placing a link to this comments thread at the end of each chapter, since at least for the first two you are posting in separate threads, and the second chapter has no link. That way, if the comments get separated from the story, it's easier for readers to find and leave comments.

Thanks for the suggestion! I have added it to the bottom of the chapter.

Joined: Feb 2021
Posts: 440
Likes: 18
T
Toomi8 Offline OP
Beat Reporter
OP Offline
Beat Reporter
T
Joined: Feb 2021
Posts: 440
Likes: 18
Originally Posted by bakasi
Just realized that I didn't leave feedback, yet. It's intersting to see Henderson's perspective here. Of course I'm dying to know how poor Clark is doing. Waiting for tommorrow!!

When this story was idling in a scribbler (because I hadn't deemed it worthy of a computer write up yet!), I couldn't figure out how to get beyond the first chapter. It was Henderson's perspective that launched the rest of the fic, surprisingly. He originally wasn't going to be a 'participant,' yet ended up being my personal catalyst.

Psst..... Part 3 is up smile

Joined: Jan 2019
Posts: 1,007
Likes: 19
Top Banana
Offline
Top Banana
Joined: Jan 2019
Posts: 1,007
Likes: 19
Oh goodness. I wonder if Henderson has figured it out....
Perry is so great.

Page 1 of 6 1 2 3 4 5 6

Moderated by  Kaylle, SuperBek 

Link Copied to Clipboard
Powered by UBB.threads™ PHP Forum Software 7.7.5