Lois & Clark Forums Forums Fan Fiction Lois & Clark Fanfic License To Love - 8/9

They stayed like this for a long time, touching their foreheads, Lois’ tears moistening Clark’s cheeks. He, too, was at the verge of crying, with shame, and relief, and joy, and despair and all the other emotions running through him. His heart was beating like mad, excited that she had forgiven him although he probably was the world’s biggest moron. Calling him an idiot had most definitely been too kind a word.

He knew how lucky he was to have her. His arms tingled with the desire to wrap them around her and hold her close to his chest. His body was still heavy with exhaustion, every tendon, muscle and bone sore after he'd used up his last reserves.

But with her forehead against his, the whiff of her breath tickling on his skin, his aches faded.

"I love you so much," he said huskily.

His hand found the way to her waist, stroking her lightly. She felt so good.

"I love you, too." There was a slight hitch to her voice. Her eyes bore into his, her tone of voice imploring. "Never do that again."

His stomach did a flip flop. The pain in her gaze made him cringe with guilt. The promise was already on his lips, when he realized that even though he desperately wanted to, he just couldn't make himself say the words.

She felt so small between his hands, so soft and fragile that he was almost afraid to break her though his arms didn't even have the strength to hold anything heavier than a glass of water. And the fear crept back into his heart, the blood in his veins running cold.

Lois sat up straight, folding her arms in front of her chest. "Clark, you're not actually thinking about using that stuff on yourself again, are you?"

It pained him to see her so angry and desperate, knowing that it was his fault. He couldn't quite look at her. The last thing he wanted was to hurt her - in any way whatsoever. And he could see it in her eyes how much she was hurting right now, because of what he’d done, what he'd do again if it meant that she'd stay unharmed. Which was ridiculous really, because if anything, this evening had proven that he couldn't protect her either way.

Clark closed his eyes, feeling awfully trapped. Was there really no way to make it right?

He swallowed hard. "All l want is for you to be safe. If that means enduring some pain, I will do it. I admit it was a mistake to do it when I did, and most importantly without telling you about it.”

Lois let out a low groan. “You really expect me to sit by watching you while you hurt yourself and risk your life?”
Clark’s lips became a tight line. “Do you expect me to gamble with yours? I won’t do that - I’d rather die than see you get hurt. Exposing myself is my decision, Lois. Not yours.”

She jumped up from where she’d been sitting on the bed and she started to pace. “This is madness.” She threw up her hands. “And I won’t have it, Clark! You hear me? I simply won’t have it.”

She looked at him, her expression raw with emotions. Tears were streaming down her face, but he could also see her anger, her helplessness and her love. His heart went out to her. And in this moment, he wanted nothing more than to get up and wrap her into his firm embrace. He wanted to tell her that everything would be fine, that they’d be fine. But he couldn’t. His floating, the cracked tile in his bathroom, his fear for her safety kept him from giving her that kind of reassurance. His heart broke. The ugly truth was that no matter what he did, he would probably end up hurting her.

“I’m so sorry, Lois,” he said quietly. “I’ll leave you as soon as I have the strength to walk again, if that's what you want.”

She stared at him, her eyes wide. “Now you’re running off, just like that?”

He shook his head. “Not just like that. But I don’t see any other way, if you don’t want to risk my life and I don’t want to risk yours. And now matter how careful we are, Lois, no matter what you say, you can’t deny that I’d be risking your life if I made love to you with all my powers intact. I am not going to do that.”

Her anger was tangible, coming off her in waves. Clark gritted his teeth, preparing for another rant. He knew he deserved her wrath. What he’d suggested had been too much to ask, he could see that. If places were reversed, he wouldn’t be able to stand and watch while she subjected herself to the kind of pain the crystal inflicted on him. How could he expect that of her?

Instead of launching into another rant, she hung her head. Her voice was soft. “I understand that you’re scared, Clark. We both are.” She came closer and once again sat down on the edge of her bed. With one hand she reached out and brushed a strand of hair out of his face. “I’m so afraid of losing you, like I almost did tonight. Please don’t do that to me. I love you so much it scares me.”

And before he knew what was happening, her lips were on his. She kissed him with fierce passion. His breath caught in his throat as her silky tongue slipped past his lips, plundering his mouth with abandon. Any coherent thought just fled him and Clark gave himself over to the sensation she was evoking in him. She tasted sweet with a faint hint of saltiness. Her lips were so tender, the brush of her tongue so exciting that he just couldn't get enough of her. Intense desire for her stirred deep within his belly. He wanted to touch her, explore every inch of her body with his lips and his hands. The paralyzing fatigue in his muscles and bones was almost forgotten. Almost.

He broke the kiss, gasping for breath. "Lois, what are you doing?"

The fog of desire in his brain settled a bit, allowing him to notice the firm set of her jaw, the grim determination that was written all over her face. Her cheeks looked flushed, her lips slightly swollen. Her eyes were dark with desire and something else he couldn't quite understand. But it sent a shiver down his spine.

She bent down again, recapturing his lips with the same fierce passion. But something was missing. This didn't feel right. Clark was hard pressed to keep his wits about him as he was once again about to lose himself in the intoxicating feeling of her lips on his. He moaned his pleasure as she nibbled on his lower lip, sucking gently while her hands fumbled with the buttons of his shirt, opening the upper half of them. Her fingers slid lower, tracing his bare chest with slow circular motions.

She tugged at his shirt, pulling it from the waistband of his trousers. A slight jolt of pain jostled him from his daydream. He couldn’t stifle a small gasp. However, the brief moment of discomfort was enough to let him think more clearly.

He turned his head to break the kiss and reached for Lois’ arms, gently removing her hands from his chest. “Stop it, Lois. What’s going on here?”

She was panting slightly as she straightened again. Defiantly, she stuck out her bottom lip. “We’re going to settle this once and for all!”

He stared at her, slightly taken aback. “What?”

“I think you understood me just fine,” Lois said with a hint of anger. “If you think that the only way to safely make love to me is without your powers, we’re doing it tonight. I told you I’m not letting you expose yourself again.”

“You can’t be serious,” he mumbled, now utterly flabbergasted.

She raised her chin, in an attempt to convince him that she was being serious. “Of course I am.”

But her whole body-language belied her words. Her lower lip was trembling slightly, her eyes were wide, as if begging him to stop her from going through with this kind of insanity. Clark’s eyes flitted to her chest, taking in the sight of the swell of her breasts showing above the neckline of her dress, teasing him from beneath the lacy fabric. He longed to kiss her again. But it wasn’t right.

“No, you’re not,” he whispered. With some difficulty, he propped himself up on one elbow, using his other hand to cup her cheek. “I can tell that you’re scared.”

“Yes, I’m scared,” she admitted. “Terrified, actually, of losing you, of having to watch you in so much pain, of never getting a chance to really love you.” More tears were welling up in her eyes.

“We agreed to wait, to go about it slowly, didn’t we?” he asked softly.

“Until you decided to go ahead and expose yourself to this awful crystal, Clark,” she reminded him bitterly.

“I told you I’m sorry about it.” Clark felt a heavy lump in his throat. “I never meant to hurt you. And I surely didn’t intend to pressure you into something you’re clearly not ready for.”
Her lips became a tight line, her eyes narrowing on him, leaving little doubt that she was very serious about this. “You said that you wouldn’t make love to me as long as you still have your powers. And I’m not going to let you use that crystal again. That only leaves tonight.”

He let out a huff. “Why are you so stubborn about this?”
“I’m not the one being stubborn,” she grumbled. There was a dangerous gleam in her eyes. “You are. So, there is only one thing you need to decide - do you want me or not?”
The look in her eyes was difficult to read. There was passion, longing and love for sure, but also fear and a deep hurt that cut him to the quick.

Clark let out a low groan and sank back onto the bed. He buried his face in his hands. “Of course I want you. But not like this. Not when you look like this is something you don't want to do but feel you have to."

He looked at her, the pure determination in her expression crumbling, leaving sadness where only seconds before had been anger.

"I want this, Clark," Lois whispered. She lowered her gaze and he could see her swallow. "I'm just nervous."

His lips twitched in a small smile. "That makes two of us." Clark struggled into a sitting position and gently tilted up her chin until she looked at him. "We don't have to do it tonight. Actually, I think that there is actually a rule about not making love on the first date."

Lois pursed her lips. "I'm quite certain there is also a rule about not almost getting killed during a date."
Clark grimaced. "Touché."

Lois grinned. "And technically, it's our second date, if you count the candle light dinner in the ruins."

Clark cringed. "Do we have to count that?"

Lois gave him a firm nod. "After tonight, I'd say it's a picture perfect example of what dating you is like. Given our track record, I'm not taking any chances with dating you a third time before I know you're worth the trouble."

Clark felt his stomach clench and averted his gaze. "I might not be."

Her expression softened and she bit her lip. "I'm sorry, Clark. It was supposed to be a joke, but I guess it was just a very stupid thing to say."

He ran his hand through his hair. "No, unfortunately, you're absolutely right. I'm a lot of trouble. All I want is to make you happy, but all I end up doing is causing you grief."

She shook her head. "That's not true. I know you make every single one of your blasted decisions, because you love me." She leaned in and touched her forehead to his. "I don't think that any man has ever loved me like you do. And I've never loved someone as much as I love you. Believe me, you are worth the trouble."

She placed a kiss on his mouth, less fervent, less aggressive, but just as passionate. He parted his lips, welcoming the silky intruder that initiated a slow dance. The world around them faded to insignificance. This kiss was lacking nothing. Clark hoped it was never going to end.

When Lois finally pulled back, she ran her hand through the hair in the nape of his neck. "Please, Clark, let's make the most of that hare-brained idea of yours."

Part of him wanted to say yes, but there was still that flicker of fear in her gaze that told him she still had reservations about this, no matter what she claimed. Clark closed his eyes. He couldn't think straight with her this close to him.
She smelled so good, felt so incredible and he knew without a shadow of a doubt that he'd just scratched the surface of how amazing making love to Lois would be. God, he wanted her like he'd never wanted anything in his life.

But he also needed to think.

Another kind of pressure in his belly offered him some much needed reprieve.

"I need a break," he mumbled.

Lois flinched. "Do you want to sleep or are you running out on me again?" she asked bitterly.

“I’m not running out on you.” He shook his head with a self-conscious smile. "Guess, I wouldn't make it very far, anyway. What I’m trying to say is - I need a bathroom break.”

Her lips opened in surprise. “Oh, I understand. Do you need help?”

“I’d rather do this on my own, Lois.” He took a deep, steadying breath, feeling like he should be more open with her. “Right now, my thoughts and emotions are such a jumble. I could use a few minutes of privacy to get myself cleaned up and…uh… take care of business.”

She gave a reluctant nod. “But you’re going to call, if you’re in any kind of trouble, okay? No playing the hero, no passing out on the bathroom floor, no cracking tiles so you can work yourself into another frenzy.”

He chuckled softly. “I promise I’m not going to break any of your tiles.”

She set her jaw firmly and wriggled her index finger. “You better.”

Lois’ eyes were firmly trained on him as he gingerly stood up. Another jolt of pain went through his side and he clutched at his ribs, a small groan escaping his lips. His legs still felt like jello, but they were able to support his weight a lot better than they had earlier. He swayed for a moment, before he felt confident that he would make the way to her bathroom under his own steam.

Each step was cautious as he tried not to jostle his aching side while he walked the short distance. It took him more than twice as long as he’d normally need for the few yards, but he managed. Releasing a breath he didn’t realize he’d been holding, Clark closed the door behind him and rested his back against it.

What was he going to do?

For so many days and nights, he’d been dreaming about making love to Lois. But this certainly wasn’t how he’d imagined it to happen. He didn’t feel prepared, and he was almost sure that the same was true for her. And there was absolutely no need to rush into this, just because… He hung his head. It was his own very stupid decision that had put him into this situation. If he looked at it from Lois’ point of view, her logic was a lot more compelling than his.

With a low groan, Clark pushed himself off the door and went to Lois’ sink. He bent forward and splashed his face with water. When he straightened, he studied his face in the mirror. All the cuts and lacerations he’d felt before were healed. He took a towel and wiped his face dry. Then he undid the rest of the buttons and shrugged out of his ruined shirt. His stomach was smeared with dried blood.

Clark spotted a washcloth on the shelf next to the sink. He held it under the water and started to wipe his skin clean. He needed to apply some pressure on his wound to scrub off all the remnants of dried blood. He hissed at the pain even that gentle pressure caused him. Eventually, all that was left was the deep red and purple of a very angry looking bruise.

When he was done, he looked at himself once more - at his bare chest. He wished that he’d had something else to wear. Walking back into Lois’ bedroom in his half-naked state didn’t seem like such a good idea.

But if they did what she’d suggested they should do, the last thing he needed was clothing. Clark closed his eyes and took more deep, steadying breaths. Vivid images of undressing Lois appeared before his mind’s eye. He should think about something else, he really should.

But her lips were so warm and inviting, her kisses so mind-blowing that it was hard to think about anything but how she’d felt in his arms. He wanted her, there was no doubt about that. But still, it didn’t seem right. Normal people would be dating, gradually exploring intimacy together. Not rushing into it, because they felt they had to.

It shouldn’t be like this.

But he wasn’t normal. And if Lois insisted that he mustn’t expose himself again, and if he felt that he couldn’t risk intimacy with her if he had his powers - maybe tonight really was their only chance.

So maybe, they should seize it if that was what Lois truly wanted.

***

Lois felt bad for spying on Clark. It wasn’t right to invade his privacy like that. But she couldn’t help herself - she needed to know if he was all right. So, she pressed her ear against her bathroom door. If places were reversed, she’d be furious if she’d find him hovering in front of the door, eavesdropping on every slight sound she made. Yet, here she was, holding her breath, lest she miss any possible signs of trouble.

Watching him stumble toward the bathroom had been pure torture. It had taken every ounce of self-restraint not to immediately rush to his side. She knew he wouldn't want her help. His pride already was in tatters and she didn't want to risk their fragile truce.

But not being able to watch him had proven to be even worse. Seconds after Clark had closed the door, she hadn't been able to take it any more.

Now she was pressing her ear to the wood, listening to the soft sounds he made inside her bathroom. Her heart was beating in her throat, as she was painfully reminded of the moans of pain she had heard outside another bathroom, roughly six months ago.

Lois heard the splashing sounds of water as Clark turned on the faucet. There were low hissing sounds and moans as he cleaned himself up. A long moment of silence followed until Lois finally heard the flushing of the toilet, followed by a couple of uneven steps.

With a start, she rushed back to the bed, flopping down on its edge, trying her best to appear as if she’d never been anywhere else. And she wasn’t a moment too soon. The bathroom door opened and Clark returned into her bedroom, a slightly self-conscious smile on his lips.
Lois’ jaw dropped as she took in his broad muscular chest and firm abs. Though his right side was sporting an ugly purple bruise, there was nothing to be self-conscious about. She wasn’t sure she’d ever seen him in his whole magnificence. Her mouth ran dry and the question of how he was feeling just died on her lips.

“I don’t suppose you have a shirt?” he asked sheepishly. “The purple one is ruined.”

Lois blinked in confusion, wondering why the heck he would want a shirt. It was warm and - or was that just her? It took a conscious effort to close her mouth long enough to keep herself from drooling, let alone answer him. She felt awfully silly to lose it like that.

“None that would fit you,” she whispered hoarsely.

A blush crept across his otherwise pale cheeks. “Guess, I have to stay this way then.”

Clark made a few more tentative steps toward her, swaying precariously, before he steadied himself against the wall. His face drained of any color and he wiped a fine sheen of sweat from his forehead. He gritted his teeth and took the next few steps, one arm firmly pressed to his aching side, the other one holding onto the wall for support. Lois' heart clenched in dread as she realized how terrible he looked. Had she actually intended to seduce him? Right now that just seemed like a ridiculous idea. He could barely walk and he certainly was in no state to do anything but rest.
She jumped up to assist him.

He waved her off. "Just a couple more steps. I'll be fine."

"You don't look fine," she insisted.

For a moment, his expression turned wry. Then he seemed to concentrate even harder, closing the distance to her bed almost without swaying. The whole way her eyes remained trained on him, her body tense, prepared to catch him, should he fall.

A hint of amusement tinted his voice."Do you… really think… you could…keep me upright…if I lost… my footing?"

He was panting as he gingerly sat down on the bed. His color improved a bit, but there was still perspiration covering his forehead.

"I would certainly try," Lois said defiantly.

She wasn't sure if she should be angry that he was trying to cover his discomfort. In a way, it was also sweet, because she knew it wasn't just his pride that inspired his act. Most importantly, he didn't want her to worry. Though that was something he failed to accomplish, and terribly so.

Clark let out a slow breath. "I'm about twice as heavy as you are," he said gently. "You'd probably end up on the floor with me."

She sat down next to him and laid her hand on his arm. "That's not the worst that could happen."

His gaze drifted to where she was touching him. As he looked up again, his eyes had darkened. Clark swallowed visibly and ran a weary hand through his hair.

He chuckled softly. "Still set out to seduce me?"

Lois lowered her gaze, feeling incredibly uncomfortable all of a sudden. What had she been thinking? Her emotions had clearly gotten the better of her.

She pulled her hand back. "I'm sorry, Clark. That was a stupid idea. I'd better let you recover. You look so tired."

Clark raised his brows. "Wasn't that the whole point of your approach, earlier? That I haven’t recovered?"

She stared at him, not sure what to make of his statement. Surely, he couldn’t mean… "You would want to go through with it? In your current state?"

A brief smile flashed across his face. "You didn't seem to care much about my state while you were kissing me senseless."

Was it her imagination, or did he enjoy this? She opened her mouth, but no sound would come out.

Clark shook his head, another chuckle escaping his lips. He brushed a strand of hair behind her ear. Heat was radiating off his fingers, making her wish that he’d really touch her, cup her cheek, kiss her again, just anything to give her at least another passing moment of intimacy.

His voice was so very gentle as he continued. "Having second thoughts?"

Lois bit her lip, feeling even more guilty. He could read her so well. "I was so angry with you I wasn't thinking straight. I can be terrible when I'm determined to prove something."

He smiled at her, his eyes gleaming with affection for her. "A force of nature for sure, but never terrible."

Butterflies fluttered through her stomach - such words from him even after their recent argument. After he’d taken a knife to the abdomen to keep her safe. She didn’t feel like she deserved him.

A lump built up in her throat. "Even when I follow you into your hideout in Suicide Slum, rummage through your stuff and almost kill you?"

"Uh huh." He placed a soft kiss on her cheek. "Even then."
She closed her eyes, savoring that brief moment of contact. It felt so good to be near him. But there was also guilt rippling through her, because he was still sitting here, kissing her rather than taking care of himself. Would he go through with making love to her if she asked him to? Did she even want him to?

Mentally, she berated herself. He was injured. Why was she even considering any of this? He needed rest in order to heal.

Lois once more placed her hand on his arm and cleared her throat. "You should really lie down, Clark."

He covered her hand with his, stroking its back with his thumb. “As long as I sit, I'm good."

Lois gave him an incredulous look. "Remember? I said no playing the hero!"

He wriggled his brows, his grin turning sheepish "Do I look like a hero to you?"

Lois didn’t know if she should laugh or cry. "Clark!"

"Okay, okay,” he raised his hands in a pacifying gesture. “I'll lie down. I just… I feel more comfortable talking to you, when I’m not flat on my back.”

Lois ran her free hand over his cheek, stroking it lightly. “You should be sleeping, not talking to me.”

He hung his head, looking rather crestfallen all of a sudden. “But I’d really like to talk to you some more,” he admitted. “We just stopped arguing, I’d hate to go to sleep before we’ve really made up.”

Lois’ heart flip flopped. How did he always know how to say exactly the right things? Her desire to spend more time with him, to settle their argument once and for all was at war with her worry for him. It was a losing battle.

Quickly, she gave in. “Okay, we’ll talk some more. But we’ll do it lying down.” He smiled his brilliant smile at her and started to sink into a lying position, but she held him back. “You should get more comfortable, just in case you doze off later.” When he looked at her slightly confused, she added. “Come on, Clark, take your pants off.”

His eyes widened. “Lois, I…”

She heaved a sigh. “Clark, you saved my life tonight. You’re going to sleep in my bed and you’ll be a lot more comfortable in your underwear, believe me. I’m not going to look, if that’s what you’re afraid of.”

“I’m not afraid of you seeing me in my underwear,” Clark replied, sounding a bit subdued. “The first time that happened was within a few hours of meeting you. We know each other a lot better now than we did then.”

He fell silent, studying her face as if he was looking for something in particular. Otherwise he didn’t move, not to get up and undress himself or to ask her if she could leave him alone for a moment.

She frowned at him. “Do you think I’m going to launch another attack on you?”

Clark flushed and looked down into his lap. “The thought had crossed my mind.”

She shook her head, reaching out to make him look at her again. “I promise, I’m not going to do that.”

His blush intensified. “But whatever happened to - we have to do it tonight, if we’re going to do it at all?”

Had she really said that? True, she’d been furious with him, but that sounded so incredibly stupid that she couldn’t believe those words had ever left her mouth. And what had she been thinking, anyway? He was injured and in pain.

Lois felt her own cheeks burn with embarrassment. “I changed my mind when I saw you come out of the bathroom.”

He looked at her, as if he was trying to read her mind. There was an intensity in his gaze that made her breath catch. She desperately wanted to apologize for pressuring him like that, for making him think that she wouldn’t give him another chance.

He cleared his throat. “Well, I didn’t change my mind. I’m not going to make love to you when I have all my powers.”

Her heart clenched in dread, the same rush of emotions running through her that had swept her away earlier. How would she be able to stand having to wait for another night, knowing what would have to do for her?

“I know, Clark.” Lois swallowed past the lump in her throat and closed her eyes. She hated the idea that he would hurt himself. But the last thing she wanted was to restart their argument. “Maybe we should decide what to do when we cross that bridge?”

“And get into another fight over this?” His gaze flickered with fear and pain. “I was hoping that, tonight, we could put that past us.”

Lois blinked in confusion. Surely, he couldn’t mean… “Are you trying to tell me that you want to make love tonight? But Clark, you nearly passed out on the way back.”

His jaw tightened. “I didn’t pass out, not even nearly,” he replied a little grumpily. “I’ll admit that the walk to the bathroom and back to the bed was tough.”

That had to be the understatement of the year. Lois felt the hairs in the back of her neck rise as another wave of anger washed over her. Suddenly, the air seemed to sizzle with electricity, as if their next fight was already announcing itself. Lois heaved a sigh of frustration. Their date had started out so wonderful and now they were trapped in an impasse they just couldn’t get past.

And her anger over this impossible situation was beginning to get the better of her. “But still you decided that you want to make love to me tonight?”

His eyes narrowed and his voice trembled with meticulously controlled anger. “I didn’t decide that we would make love, because that decision would have to be mutual, as far as I am concerned.” Clark took a deep breath, obviously trying to calm himself down. “I merely came to the conclusion that I shouldn’t dismiss the idea of making love completely, just because convention dictates that it shouldn’t happen on a first date, or before I’d marry you.”

She let out a slow breath, her anger rushing out of her. “I told you I want to make love to you, Clark.”

“Just not now,” he guessed.

Lois flinched. The nervousness was back. She still didn’t know what had been going through her mind when she’d kissed Clark with the sole purpose of seducing him. Would she have gone through with it if he hadn’t stopped her? She had been turned on, there was no denying that. And if she kissed him again, there was no doubt in her mind that the intense desire for him would return. But what then?

"It's okay," Clark said quietly. "You seemed so hesitant earlier, I didn’t believe you were really willing to go through with it.”

He took her hand in his and squeezed it gently. His eyes were so full of love that Lois felt her heart swell.

His voice was rough as he continued. “I'd love to cuddle for a while if you'd like that. I guess you’re right, we can figure out how to deal with my powers at a later time, when we’re both ready to take that step.”

A tear slipped down her cheek, before she even realized she was crying.

His loving expression turned into one of concern. "What's the matter, Lois? Did I say something wrong?"

She shook her head firmly, more tears running down her cheeks. "What did I ever do to deserve you?" She hiccupped.

His eyes rested on her as he reverently lifted her hand to his lips and placed a soft kiss on her knuckles. "Everything."
Lois felt both cherished and humbled, not knowing how to reply to that. She wiped away her tears, overcome with so many emotions that it simply overwhelmed her.
But her mouth took on a life of its own, the words out before she had a chance to think about them. "For someone who had no experience whatsoever, you sure know how to sweet talk a woman."

Lois cringed, instantly regretting she had said that. But if Clark took offense, he gave no indication.

Instead, he cracked a smile. "I'm a quick learner."

Lois let out a helpless chuckle, feeling like she desperately needed a break. This man was driving her crazy, regardless of whether he held her in his arms and kissed her or was just close to her.

She jumped up, trying to get some distance between herself and this incredible man next to her. She fumbled for something to say. “How…how about you…uh… get out of those pants and I change into something… more comfortable, and then we cuddle for a while until you fall asleep?”

His face lit up. “That sounds wonderful.”

“Will you manage on your own?” she asked, concerned.
He grinned. “I’ve been able to get out of my pants since I was three years old. I think I’ll be fine.”

Lois rolled her eyes, unsure how he was still able to joke after everything he’d gone through tonight. She thought about teasing him back because she knew he wouldn't mind. That was one of the many things she loved about him. But she was too happy about all arguments being settled to risk upsetting him.

Before she had another emotional meltdown right next to him, Lois quickly grabbed her pajamas and excused herself. She almost sprinted into her bathroom, grateful for a moment of solace to compose herself. Still, her heart was beating madly as she went through her evening routine of removing her makeup, brushing her teeth and changing.
With a deep breath, she returned into her bedroom. Clark had slipped under her covers. His eyes were closed and he was breathing evenly. A smile twitched at the corners of her mouth as she realized that he had already dozed off. But she also felt a twinge of disappointment, because now she wouldn’t be able to talk to him until morning.

Lois tiptoed toward her bed, intending to get a cushion so she would be more comfortable on one of her loveseats.
Clark’s eyes fluttered open. “You’re back.”

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to wake you,” she said guilitly.

“I wasn’t asleep, just focusing on healing,” he replied. Clark turned a bit until he was facing her and lifted up the blanket. “Come join me. There will be no funny business, I promise.” His eyes twinkled with mischief.

Lois wriggled her brows. “You’re sounding awfully self-assured, Mr. Kent.”

He studied her carefully. “Is that a bad thing?”

“No, actually, I think I like that,” Lois admitted. She sat down on the edge of her bed and accepted his invitation to slip underneath the covers with him.

He scooted backward, making room for her. He covered her with the blanket as they both lay in the bed, facing each other, close enough they could easily touch each other. For a while they just looked at each other. And already, Lois felt like she was getting lost in his eyes and the sight of his smiling lips. She loved his lips. They could kiss, boy, could they kiss. Her heart fluttered excitedly, as she inhaled his soft scent and saw his lips twitch in what she hoped would become another kiss. She was longing to feel his lips on hers again. And the impulse to just close that small distance became more urgent with every passing second.

But instead of kissing her, Clark’s expression turned serious all of a sudden. “Lois? Can I ask you something?”

Lois blinked, confused about the sudden change in him. Her reply was slightly wary. “Of course.”

He looked nervous. “When you tried to seduce me, earlier, I couldn’t help but notice that you were scared of something. Are you going to tell me what that was?”

Lois inhaled sharply. He had noticed. She bit back a low groan. Of course he would notice. He wasn't like the other men who couldn't have cared less about her feelings.

She heaved a sigh. "I'm not sure I should tell you this."
He ran a comforting hand down her arm. "You were the one who taught me that it usually helps to talk about your worries."

She swallowed hard. "You're right, but I'm kind of worried that you're going to freak out, though this is about me, not about you."

His expression turned self-conscious. "I promise I'm trying my best not to jump to any conclusions," he vowed.

He looked so sincere that she almost had to chuckle. But also her heart was beating madly in her chest, afraid that she would end up ruining the evening after all if she confessed about her doubts. But if she expected honesty from Clark, she should hold herself to the same standards.

"Fine," Lois let out a slow breath. "I kept telling you that I'm not scared you're going to hurt me when we make love. But I am." When his eyes widened, she hurried to add. "Not because of your powers. They have nothing to do with it. But the few times I've been intimate with men, it…” She took a steadying breath, her voice barely a whisper. “Well, it did hurt."

He didn't say a word, just stared at her. She could see the flicker of pain in his eyes, his worry reflecting in them. Lois was afraid that in the next moment, he was going to jump up and run out on her after all. He stayed where he was, though.

His voice was trembling slightly as he finally spoke. "But still, you'd want to make love to me?”

She attempted to smile at him, but felt that she failed to be convincing. "I'm hoping it will be different with you.”

He gave her a helpless shrug. "But I don't even know what I'm doing."

Lois squeezed her eyes shut. She hadn’t wanted to make him feel bad about himself, just tell him what was going on inside her mind. Why was this so difficult?

She gritted her teeth. "I'm sure it wouldn’t be your fault, Clark. It’s me - I’m just…"

His brows furrowed. “Wait a moment! If I hurt you, how would that not be my fault?”

There was that flicker of fear again, the one that she’d hoped she’d never see again. And it terrified her more than the admission that was stuck on her tongue.

“Because I'm frigid,” she blurted out.

Clark’s lips became a tight line, his jaw ticking with barely concealed anger. “No.”

“I must be.” She bit her lip. “One of the guys I've been with? All of the women kept gushing about what a fantastic lover he was. But I didn't feel anything but discomfort. He was complaining that he knew sex dolls who were more fun than me.”

“You're not frigid,” Clark repeated, full of conviction. “You’ve got more passion in your pinky finger than anyone I know. And that’s not just because I hardly know any other women. You made it impossible for me not to notice you, and I tried really, really hard to ignore those feelings. You made me reveal my secret to you, all in a little more than twenty four hours of meeting you. If any of those guys did hurt you, it was them. And if I hurt you, it’s going to be my fault.”

“But it won’t be like that!” Lois protested, not sure if she was actually convinced or just pretending that she was. “Because you’re different, because you care.”

He gave her an awkward smile. “That’s an awful lot of trust you place in me.”

She ran her hand down his cheek and placed a brief kiss on his mouth. “Because you deserve it.”

She closed the distance to his lips again, feeling that now familiar rush of excitement wash over her. He was so close to her, smelling so wonderful, sharing her bed. All the things that two days ago she’d never expected to happen. And suddenly, she wanted nothing more than to find out how passionate she could really be in the arms of this man. Her heart swelled with love for him, bursting through her chest as their lips touched again.

His mouth was on hers so warm and inviting, so soft and gentle, nibbling at her lower lip, sucking, teasing. His tongue caressed the inside of her mouth, flickered against her tongue, letting the world around them fade. A fire started deep within her belly. She wanted more of this, more of him.

By the time they parted, she was gasping for breath. Her lips mourned the loss of contact.

“Kiss me again, Clark,” she pleaded.

His eyes were dark with desire, but there was also a flicker of worry in them. “What if we get carried away?”

She drew a deep breath. “Then perhaps we should just seize the moment. That is, if you’re feeling well enough. I mean, you’re injured after all.”

He cast his eyes down. “I’m feeling better when you’re near me. It’s as if you give me strength.” His voice turned rough. “It’s always been like this. I could feel it even the first time you touched me. I healed faster.”

Lois frowned. “How is that possible?”

“Beats me,” he said with a shrug. He cupped her cheek with his hand. “It’s all part of the magic, I guess.”

He smiled at her and placed another kiss on her lips. She felt herself melt under his gentle ministrations. The fire in her belly became more intense, making every inch of her skin tingle with the need to touch and be touched. A low moan escaped her throat as he pulled back again.

His dark eyes bore into her. “But we’re going to tell each other if any of us feels like we’re going a step too far.”

“Promise,” she said quietly.

Clark cleared his throat. “And if it doesn’t happen tonight, maybe we could keep the crystal nearby the next time we try. Inside the box, but close enough that either of us can open it in case something seems to go wrong.”

Lois let out a sigh of relief, because he no longer suggested that he’d expose himself beforehand. “I guess I could live with that. Now kiss me, before you doze off.”

“I could never doze off with you so close to me,” he said huskily, before he pressed his lips to hers.