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#294087 11/30/22 10:32 AM
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Thanks so much for reading!

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Where have you been hiding all this time? This is terrific. I love it. I could feel as if I was Lois or at least a fly in the room. Great job and can't wait for more.

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OMG!!! notworthy JUST WOW! Carrie’s right… you just pulled us RIGHT into the emotions, both with Lois’ and Clark’s POV… I literally sitting here tense with my heart racing still as I type this. lol

The part when she finally starts talking to him at her apartment? That WHOLE bit is just fantastic! And that he still doesn’t know…and her reaction… I honestly don’t even feel like I have words, lol. I’m SO excited to read part 3 when you’ve got it for us!! hyper smile1

I really wanted to stop and comment more in detail on writing and characterization but I couldn’t stop reading. This bit, though…this bit made me pause and gasp out loud:

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He continued to scan the city as he flew, both with his super vision and with his hearing—-

And then he found her.

It wasn’t exactly difficult to do so. It was almost like she was a magnet, pulling on his heartstrings with such vigor that he had no choice but to follow…

That last line! GAH I love it so much! I’m a huuuuuuge sucker for the heartbeat thing with him, and this description of him searching for her, extending his hearing to find her by her heartbeat is just magnificent!! notworthy clap

We’re really so lucky to have you here!! Can’t wait for the conclusion!!

Sara smile


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Wow thanks so much!! I’ve been lurking, and writing for other Superman fandoms. This community is wonderful, thanks so much for the kind words!!

Last edited by Jerseygrl; 12/01/22 07:01 AM. Reason: Posted weirdly
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Wow, this comment was so so nice!! I’m so happy you enjoyed it! Writing these characters is such a pleasure and I’m happy you’re enjoying reading it as much as I’m loving writing it! And thanks again for the warm welcome!

Last edited by Jerseygrl; 12/01/22 07:04 AM. Reason: Posted strangely
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Hi Jerseygrl!
On to part 2!
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But no, it was just a pigeon. Or a tiny airplane, far away and high in the sky and barely visible to the naked eye…
It’s a bird! Or a plane! No, it’s not Superman!

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She felt the pull of the story completely surrounding her, engulfing her, pulling her deep into its claws, and she let it, embracing it with welcoming, open arms. She really needed this right now— it was a perfect distraction.
BATMAN: I use a laser pointer with my girlfriend.
SELINA: cat
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He was the philanthropist, the one who used his money to help people, not to harm…
Just like Lex!

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Nothing mattered. Nothing— but the story. She reached out with the tape recorder so she wouldn’t miss a single word… Clark is Superman Oh. That mattered, too.
She’s cute!

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“You see, Ms. Lane, I really do. You’ve seen too much— and we both know you aren’t exactly someone who tends to keep things to herself. Now are you…”
Some stuff she does keep to herself. Like her feelings for Clark.

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Until, suddenly, she startled as she heard three loud knocks at her door.
For some reason I just went to The Big Bang Theory here. *knock knock knock* Lois? *knock knock knock* Lois? *knock knock knock* Lois?

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Clark wasn’t new to saving Lois Lane. He had done it so many times at this point that he had completely lost count.
Gotten kinda boring huh?
CLARK: shock

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(No he hadn’t— he had saved her exactly thirty seven times as Superman and another dozen as Clark.
laugh

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She was sitting smack in the middle of her couch, her hair draped over her hands as her face hid inside of them. And then his hearing kicked in, and he heard a small sob…
Looks like rescue number fifty did the trick. She’s finally broken. He should go in and offer comfort. evil

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He noticed that it was still sealed so then, without thinking, he closed his fingers around the lid, and started to pretend to struggle with it. It wasn’t long before Lois was finally looking at him— but she was staring at him, almost as if he had two heads.
So, he made an oopsie?

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“What the HELL do you think you’re doing?” “I…” he stammered. “What do you mean?”
That’s her emergency pregnancy ration. In her situation, you never know when you might find yourself pregnant with Superman’s love child.

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Lois’s eyes were wide and round as she was clearly thinking— something. What she was thinking Clark couldn’t even guess…
LOIS: Pickles are green. Kryptonite is green. Kryptonite hurts Superman. I should offer Clark a pickle.

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“Lois…” he said, loathing himself yet again for what he had to do. “Lois, I’m so… I’m SO, so sorry—“ But then she said something that he never could have expected. “Go.”
I *was* wondering if that's where you’d go laugh

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And he disappeared, leaving only a strong, intense gust of wind in his wake.
[Linked Image]

TBD in part 3
wave Michael


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Loving this cool story! Lois is a hoot. Clark's breaking into her home...

Onto the next chapter!


Morgana

A writer's job is to think of new plots and create characters who stay with you long after the final page has been read. If that mission is accomplished than we have done what we set out to do, which is to entertain and hopefully educate.

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