Author’s note:
Thanks so much for reading, and for welcoming me into this fandom! It’s been such a pleasure!
The Card, chapter 3
And after all of that, once again, she was left alone.
She listened carefully, and when she strained her ears she could hear the telltale whoosh as he disappeared. She knew she could find out where he was in an instant, and that he would inevitably be featured, front and center, on every television station—
And then, before she knew it, she was picking up the remote from the side table. She turned on the TV, and it was already turned on to CNN from the last time she had wanted to keep an eye on Superman’s escapades—
For “Planet business.” Right, that’s why she usually tuned in to watch him, night after night, performing his saves, one after the next, in all of his glory…
It was for “Planet business.” Not for any other reason…
Not because she cared about him. Not because she loved him…
No. DEFINITELY not that.
This time the cameras were focused on a burning building of some kind, and the headline at the bottom of the screen seemed to indicate that it was located somewhere in New York City. The building was completely engulfed in smoke, so obscured by the thick clouds that it was barely discernible at all.
A reporter was shouting into a microphone in the foreground, his wide, bulging eyes portraying the desperation he clearly felt inside. “We are receiving reports of a child trapped inside the building. Rescue attempts are underway… no word if the child is still alive…”
But then, suddenly, a very familiar red and blue figure appeared in the periphery of the screen…
Lois’s heart quickened as she watched the scene unfold before her, her eyes completely transfixed on the TV screen.
She watched as the red and blue figure became nothing more than a blur, and then it shot forward and straight into the thick plumes of smoke, disappearing from view entirely.
Though she knew it was him, it was still so hard to believe, as if her mind refused to settle on this new reality. She was having an incredibly tough time taking the leap from knowledge to acceptance, and truly comprehending that it was CLARK who had disappeared into the clouds of smoke. CLARK, not Superman.
And then, as quickly as he had disappeared, he reemerged, his arms wrapped tightly around a small bundle of blankets. But then the bundle shifted in his arms and a small head popped up, two immaculately French-braided pigtails swaying gently in front of his face. Someone had clearly taken the time and labored over those braids, making sure they were perfectly done, almost like a crown on the little girl’s head.
The little girl was clearly beside herself, and she was visibly shaking in his arms, completely panic-stricken, with trails of tears streaking down her face. He held her securely in his arms, ducking under a low-hanging beam and carrying her towards the ambulance workers waiting eagerly in the street.
Lois stared at the screen, her eyes wide and unable to even blink, and she continued to watch him with bated breath. She watched as he suddenly paused— and then he peered down at the little girl, pushing the braids behind her small, bony shoulders. He smiled meekly, catching a pair of large, brown eyes that were fixed on him…
And then the little girl wrapped her small arms around his neck, her dimpled elbows flexed, and she pulled herself against his chest, burying her face under his chin…
And, of course, just as he was always so apt to do, he responded in kind, stroking her back in soothing, soft circles.
He was the only alien known to mankind— but despite that, Lois suddenly wondered if there was anyone in the entire world who was more human than he was…
Her mind was still reeling from all of the events of the day, and from the man who she thought she knew. It was surreal how untrue all of her widely held assumptions were— about Superman, about Clark, and even about the entire world.
She let her face collapse back into her hands, feeling tears start to flow between her fingers. She was being so ridiculous, so pathetic— Lois Lane just didn’t cry, she never did…
The tears continued to flow, falling straight through the cracks between her fingers and landing on her skirt, where they were sucked up by the fabric, leaving tiny, wet circles…
Pathetic, so pathetic—
But she couldn’t stop. So the tears continued to flow, until they were steady streams…
There was an unseen truth under all of this, something that Lois didn’t even admit to herself. But it was there, taunting her with its horrible, menacing claws, and as soon as she recognized it she couldn’t possibly look away—
She loved him.
She didn’t want to love him. He was wrong for her in SO many ways. And that was before, when she thought he was just a simple hack from nowheresville, back when she thought she knew him…
But now she knew the truth— Clark Kent didn’t really exist. And so she was actually in love with… a ghost. A fantasy. An imaginary person who was actually someone else entirely.
In the end, Clark Kent wasn’t real— so did that mean that her love wasn’t either?
But her love FELT real. It felt so real that she could almost see it hanging in the air right in front of her; it felt so real that she was convinced that if she were to reach out and touch it, she would actually feel it with her fingers.
Because she always felt it. Always. Every time she looked at him, every time she peered into his warm, lucious brown eyes, every time he whispered her name, every time he held the door for her, or pulled out her chair, or even simply brought her a cup of coffee…
It was impossible to deny the truth. Her love was real— even if the person she loved was not…
In the end, Clark didn’t return right away, despite his promise to do so. She knew he must have gone straight to another emergency, and possibly a third one after that. And soon enough when she looked up and peered through her living room window, she was surprised to see the sun dropping lower in the sky, so low that it was casting an orange hue on the tall buildings outside.
But then her eyes popped open as she finally heard the telltale whoosh once again, which was immediately followed by his distinctive set of three, loud knocks.
She glanced at her door, realizing that she hadn’t even thought to lock a single one of her four locks. “Come in,” she called softly, her voice cracking over the words. She didn’t bother shouting— she knew he could hear her anyway...
She looked away, glimpsing once again at the sun through her large window, marveling in the golden city that glittered in its rays…
“I’m sorry that took so long,” he huffed as her door creaked open.
She closed her eyes solemnly, not bothering to respond.
The door clicked shut behind him and he shuffled slowly across the room. And then he finally reached her, letting out a deep sigh as he settled onto the couch next to her.
But then her nose caught a whiff of a strange scent and she flinched, her eyes popping open on their own accord.
“What is it?” he asked.
Once again, she didn’t respond. She looked down at her fingers, lacing them together on her lap.
“Lois, again, I’m sorry it took so long. Blockbuster was closed when I got there, and I had to go to the further one, you know, the one down by the other end of the park. But when I got there it had a long line out the door, and then one of the customers was having an issue with her credit card, and—“
“You didn’t think to just use the drop box?” Lois interrupted, not bothering to look at him as she spoke.
Clark stopped talking abruptly, and now he, too, was fidgeting with his hands. “Oh, the drop box. You know what, Lois, I didn’t even think of—“
She shook her head slowly. “You know what, just stop,” she said. “Stop.”
Clark cleared his throat, sighing tentatively. “Lois—“
She sniffed loudly, and then her eyes widened even further. There it was again— that smell. It was SO strong and SO obvious; and then she wondered how she had never picked up on small details like this before…
It was almost as if she had WANTED to stay in the dark all this time… It was almost as if she preferred not to know, as if she WANTED to deny the truth…
Well, those days were very obviously behind her…
“Look, Lois, I really am sorry. I know you were trying to talk to me about something really important earlier. And not only did I leave, but after I promised you I would come right back— I didn’t. Trust me, I feel awful about it. I wish I could have come back earlier, but I—“
And then she finally turned to him, peering right into his eyes. And as she felt him stare right back into hers she felt herself completely absorbed by his eyes, cocooned inside them like a warm, fleece blanket. He looked at her with such intensity, with such vigor, and, most of all, with such love—
Because he clearly loved her just as much as she loved him.
It was so blatantly obvious that it was impossible to deny. No matter who he really was— he loved her. He REALLY loved her.
She shivered as she thought about it, grabbing her arms. And she watched as he cocked his eyebrow, confused by her response.
“Look, Lois, you told me that something’s going on. I know I probably missed the window of opportunity to discuss it, whatever it is— but please. Please, let me help—“
It was time to end this. All of this.
So she took a deep breath— and then she went for it.
“You smell like smoke.”
She continued staring right into his eyes as she watched him absorb her words.
“I… what?”
His eyes were wide now, as his negligence to fully address the post-save cleanup was clearly dawning on him.
“You smell like smoke,” she repeated.
“I smell like…” His eyes glazed over as he was clearly trying to come up with yet another lie… “Oh, right, you see, I ended up passing really close to a structure fire down by the docks, and boy, that smoke was rising in huge plumes—“
She flattened her lips, her gaze piercing and unwavering. “Did you… did you get everyone out?”
Clark’s forehead wrinkled in confusion. “Out?”
It was almost as if he was TRYING not to understand. Almost as if he preferred to remain in denial about what was really happening, about all the truths that were slowly coming to light…
“Out. Of the apartment building. Did you get everyone out?”
She stared at him, not even blinking once.
“Lois, I’m not sure what you’re—“
“Clark, I’m tired. I’m just tired. Of all of it. Of all the lies, of all the twisted truths. I’m tired— and I’m just done. There was no structure fire by the docks—
we both know that. So please, just drop it.”
His eyes widened, and he opened his mouth, clearly struggling to come up with a response.
“I um, you know, I really don’t—“
“The little girl,” she said, interrupting his stumbling mess of words. “The little girl— with the pigtail braids. She was clearly very shaken up— is she going to be all right?”
She watched as he stared at her, his breath hitching in surprise, his eyes widening even more as the reality of what she had just said dawned on him. He was frozen, almost like a statue, and it was almost as if he couldn’t remember how to breathe…
He was still staring at her, his big, brown eyes wide in shock and wonder…
And then, finally, he managed to muster the courage to speak. “Yes,” he said, his voice barely louder than a whisper. “She’s going to be fine.”
He had said it. He had actually said it.
It wasn’t as if any of this was a surprise to her— clearly not. And yet, now that he had actually said those words, her heart was racing yet again.
There was a long, heavy pause, as Lois couldn’t come up with even one word to fill the silence. The revelation that she knew was clearly weighing on him just as much as the revelation about who he really was was weighing on her.
“You… you know,” he finally stammered, choking a bit on his words.
She tried to respond, but it was as if her voice was no longer working at all.
They were sitting next to each other on the couch, frozen in place, like the two seated statues they often strolled past in Centennial Park. Lois glanced at his dark frames, the only thing that still stood between them…
And then her hand was drifting upward, completely of its own volition. She tried to make it stop, she tried to pull it back, but instead it kept drifting, up and up and up, inching closer and closer to his face…
And he didn’t make a single move to stop her.
Her hand finally reached the edge of his glasses, the tip of her index finger wisping by the dark, metal frames…
And then, without any deliberation at all, her fingers suddenly looped around the arm of his glasses.
And he didn’t even flinch.
So she went ahead and gently tugged, and slowly his glasses peeled off of his face, leaving his brown eyes large— and open— and bare— and free—
And here he was.
Clark. Superman. They were one and the same.
Clark. Superman. They coexisted, in one, single individual. Or maybe they didn’t actually exist at all...
But here he was. The man underneath it all. The REAL man, continuing to stare at her, his eyes blazing…
And then, finally, he broke his gaze, closing his eyes and sucking in a deep breath through his pursed lips. And then he opened his eyes again, searching inside hers to try to grasp the full meaning of it all.
“I guess the first question is— how long have you known?” He was speaking slowly and tentatively, as if he barely believed any of this was happening at all. “Followed by— how did you find out—“
Lois cleared her throat. “Really,” she interrupted. “That’s the first question.”
Another pause.
Clark’s eyes were still wide and desperate, and then he was reaching out to her. “Lois—“
“Since this morning,” she said. “As far as how I found out— it’s complicated. I found— something. Something I clearly wrote, it was in my handwriting— but I had no memory of writing it. But when I saw it— when I saw it I KNEW. I KNEW it was true. It was almost as if a curtain was lifted— just seeing those words made me realize the reality of it all. And then— there was no doubt.”
“I… I see,” Clark replied, swallowing heavily. “So I guess the next question is— how angry are you?”
She shook her head. “Oh, I’m not angry—“
Clark narrowed his eyes. His big, brown, Superman eyes… “Lois…”
But Lois just shrugged casually. “I’m not.”
“Wait a minute,” he said, the corner of his mouth curving into a wry grin. “A second ago I was talking to Lois Lane. I know she’s around here somewhere, but clearly she’s disappeared—“
Lois huffed. “Stop. I’m not angry! I’m just… I’m hurt.”
She blinked as she glanced at him again.
“Oh,” he said. “Look— Lois, I’m—“
“Sorry? Is that what you were going to say?” She scoffed under her breath. “Sure, I bet you are. Sorry I found out, maybe—“
“No, Lois, that’s not true. You have no idea how long I’ve wanted to tell you, how long I’ve been—“
“So why didn’t you?”
He blinked several times, clearly taken aback by the question.
“You don’t have an answer, do you. But seriously, Clark, why didn’t you tell me, if you wanted to so badly? I mean, it’s not as if I’ve told you EVERYTHING about me—“
Clark pinched the bridge of his nose. “I really did want to. But it just kept being so complicated. First you were infatuated with Superman, while at the same time completely ignoring me, and you can imagine how that made me feel—“
“What are you talking about, you ARE Superman!”
“And then there was the whole thing with Luthor. And— I don’t know, Lois. I guess I was scared. I’ve never told anyone about this— anyone. I don’t think you understand what that—“
“Are you kidding me??” Lois replied, jumping to her feet. “I don’t understand? Clark, the things I’ve told you— trust me, I haven't told anyone those things either. And I mean— ANYONE. You think I just stroll around blabbing about what happened with Claude??”
“No, of course not—“
“I thought we had something special, Clark. I thought we had the kind of friendship where we didn’t keep secrets— where we really knew each other. Where we trusted each other.”
“Lois,” he said, his eyes drooping. “We do—“
Clark pushed himself onto his feet, and then he was standing right in front of her, clearly completely at a loss of how to handle this. But she didn’t care— it just wasn’t her problem.
It was his.
“You know what,” she said suddenly, throwing her hands in the air. “I changed my mind. I am mad. I’m VERY mad. In fact, I don’t think I’ve ever been this mad in my entire life—“
And then, suddenly, he grabbed her by the wrist. Her eyes snapped upwards and met his. They stood like that for a moment, staring into each other’s eyes with such incredible intensity that Lois could almost feel him boring straight through her eyes, deep into the crevices of her brain and straight into her soul…
“Lois—“
Her name sounded heavy as it was uttered from his lips. Heavy— and loaded with so much emotion, so much meaning…
But ultimately— it just didn’t matter.
She snatched her arm away from him, causing him to jump in surprise.
“I think you should go,” she said abruptly.
He took a deep breath, his gaze continuing to hold steady and unwavering. “I… look, Lois—“
“No,” she replied, her voice steady and firm. “Go. Now.”
He didn’t budge, almost as if he couldn’t believe what she had asked of him.
“Clark— please.”
He continued to stare at her, blinking several times—
And then, finally, his shoulders fell as he sighed in defeat.
He closed his eyes.
“Ok,” he said. “Ok, I’ll go.”
“I… look, Clark—“
But he already turned his back to her, and he was facing the door—
And then, suddenly, she started doubting herself, as well as the instinct that had led her to throw him out in the first place.
She really didn’t know why she was doing it. She was mad— but it wasn’t even rational for her to feel that way. She knew that it wasn’t…
And then she was really second guessing herself. She opened her mouth, preparing to call his name…
But then, as she blinked, she felt a strong gust of wind blow across her face—
And when she opened her eyes again— he was gone.
———
The elevator doors opened, and the quiet refuge of the elevator was immediately replaced by the familiar, boisterous hustling and bustling of the world-famous Daily Planet newsroom. Clark usually thrived in this atmosphere— he loved it more than he could even put into words…
But today, instead of feeling as energized as he usually did, the pervasive noise and non-stop action made his stomach squeeze into tight knots.
And still, he found the courage to step off the elevator and onto the landing, where Perry spotted him immediately.
“Oh, Kent, it’s about time,” he said. “For Elvis’s sake, where the hell have you been?”
Obsessing about Lois, perseverating, really, and wondering if she would ever speak to him again, much less look him in the eye…
“Uh, sorry, Chief, I guess I slept in a little bit—“
“Well, I guess I can look the other— oh, Lois!”
Clark’s head swerved towards Lois’s desk in the bullpen, where he watched her eyes snap up towards Perry. He noticed how she expertly avoided Clark’s eye… that was no accident…
“What is it, Perry?”
“When you head out for your Metrogang investigation, take Kent with you—“
Lois glared at him in response. “I don’t need a partner, Perry, I can take care of myself…”
Perry only had to glare at her in response.
And then, before he knew it, he was following Lois like a puppy, making sure to maintain a large enough distance that she wouldn’t feel threatened by his presence. They finally reached the elevator, and as they piled into it he tried as hard as he could to focus on the motions of the newsroom, the colors, the sounds—
That is, until the doors finally slid closed in front of him, shutting them away from that world entirely—
And he was left staring at a blank, metallic door, with only his own, convoluted thoughts to distract him.
His thoughts— and the knowledge that he was alone in an elevator with Lois Lane.
Truthfully, he didn’t know how he was going to get through this assignment, and he was sure that Lois felt the same—
Even if she didn’t show it.
“You know what, this is stupid,” Lois suddenly said. She pulled the emergency lever, and the elevator suddenly jolted to a stop.
“Huh?” Clark replied.
He was afraid to even glance at her. But then he peeked out of the corner of his eye—
And he realized that she was staring right at him.
Her expression was hard to read, and he assumed that it wasn’t an accident. Whatever she was feeling, she was putting in an exceeding amount of effort to cover it up, to push it deep inside her where he would never even get a glimpse of it.
“We’re professionals,” she continued. “We both are. We just need to do our jobs. I know I won’t have a problem with that— will you??” She narrowed her eyes at him, daring him to talk back…
“Oh… no, of course not,” he replied quickly.
“Good,” she said. She looked away, her lips pursed into a satisfied grin, and then she pushed the emergency lever back in. The elevator immediately came to life, a faint whir barely discernible behind the walls.
“You know, you never fooled me,” she said.
Clark blinked. “What?”
“Your secret— I might not have figured it out, but I always knew who you really are…”
“You did?”
“Oh sure,” she replied. “I always knew you’re a hack from nowheresville— I just didn’t realize how far away your nowheresville really was…”
Clark’s eyebrows shot up in response as he watched her. And then, slowly, she turned her head, meeting his eyes—
And she flashed him a wide grin.
“Krypton, Smallville— doesn’t really matter when it comes down to it. All that matters is that I was right.”
And then, despite everything, Clark felt a smile creep onto his own face.
“I guess I shouldn’t be surprised,” he said. “Because you’re always right— right?”
“Oh… quiet, Smallville,” she said, rolling her eyes. “But anyway… you aren’t wrong about that.”
And then she smiled at him, her face lighting up as her eyes wrinkled at the corners; and it occurred to Clark how genuine her smile really was. Lois always wore her heart on her sleeve, and today was no different…
“So, since you’re always right,” he said, “I assume you have a plan.”
“A plan?”
“For investigating Metrogang, I mean—“
And then she reached out, patting him casually on his forearm. “Seriously, Smallville, do you really have to ask?” Lois rolled her eyes again, even more dramatically this time. “Just watch and learn, Clark, watch and learn— and you’ll see how a real reporter gets it done…”
He grinned to himself as the elevator doors finally slid open and Lois grabbed his arm, pulling him through the crowds of people in the lobby…
It wasn’t exactly a perfect ending— not even close— but maybe it didn’t need to be.
Because really, when it came down to it, it was more of a beginning.
They traipsed around the city for a while, eventually reaching a door at the base of a large, concrete building. Clark could feel Lois’s excited energy as she reached for the doorknob, her hands shaking in excitement as she attempted to turn it…
“Clark,” she said, suddenly exasperated. “The door is locked… think you can do something about that?”
He glanced at her, noticing her watching him impatiently, tapping her foot on the ground…
She asked as if it were nothing. As if she were asking him to flip a lightswitch…
He paused, his eyes widening, as he could barely believe this was actually happening.
“Well??”
He gently pushed her aside, peering down at the lock— and then he subtly lowered his glasses. A jet of red light immediately shot out of his pupils, and the lock clicked open in response.
“Oh, thank you,” she replied without thinking. “Now we can really get down to business…”
Yes— it was definitely a new beginning…
A new existence, where they would finally be able to be partners— real partners— in a way they had never been able to be before.
As far as the rest of it— there would be plenty of time for that…
One day.
Lois grabbed his hand, pulling him alongside her and into the building, pummeling headfirst into another investigation that he knew would inevitably grow sour…
But whatever they faced— it would be together.
Clark grinned. He couldn’t wait to see where his life would go next.
