Lois & Clark Forums Forums Fan Fiction Lois & Clark Fanfic FDK: A New Hero part 7/?

Nice part, Nancy. I liked how you showed us how difficult it must be to be a young boy and turn up at a major car crash scene and start rescuing people. What the heck should you do exactly, and how can you avoid injuring people further?

The scene where Zared met his classmate was great. Wow! She didn't recognize him! I liked his superhero outfit, by the way. It's nice that Martha made it for him, too. (Although it was so painful that Martha should be alive and well when Lois is dead - but I know, I know, I should stop going on about this now....)

Speaking about Martha, I think perhaps she should have reacted a bit more when she heard that Jenni was pregnant. I most certainly don't think Martha should start scolding or blaming Zared, but I think perhaps she should just generally talk to him a little about his future, his thoughts about becoming a father, his feelings about Jenni etc.

Danny is a depressing sort of father. He's going to throw his daughter out of his home because she became pregnant. You'd think parents should be there for their children when they get themselves into a situation like that.

Looking forward to seeing more of Zared and Jenni together in the next part.

Ann

Wowzers. While I was in High School and University I knew a few families that kicked out their pregnant daughter. It was always so sad. Jenni is going to be devastated.

Drum roll: Martha is here! That sounds like a terrific suit. I wonder how it would be captured in photo I too thought she would have more emotion towards seeing her grandson, Jenni and hearing about the baby.

Danny Danny Danny. What a guy. Did Zared hold his hand the whole way? I would be so afraid to be next to that man. How old are his other kids? I wonder if they are in the teen years. I doubt they'll be involved in the story much, but maybe they would get angry with their father - if he'd allow it.

I'm a little confused with the punctuation.

I'm glad Zared's first suited emergency went well. I'm surprised he had no hesitancy. That is great!

Awesome stuff - I'm looking forward to more.

You guys are right. Martha needs to react more. I couldn't decide whether to have her get upset or not, but now I will add something.

I'll fix the punctuation. Sorry about that.

I wish I could draw (well anyway) because I'd love to draw my image of Zared's outfit. Any ideas for a name?

And, yeah, Danny's got a lot of hangups.

And Zared feels indestructible - both as a teen and a Kryptonian. That's why he has no problem pulling Danny down the hall towards the chapel.

Nancy

Hi,

Great part. Hope Danny is not becoming alien phobic?


More ASAP, please.

MAF

After reading the comments about Martha's reaction to Jenni's pregnancy, I agreed that there needed to be an addition made to the story. I've now added several paragraphs concerning her reaction. The changes are in italics. I hope part of the addition gives you a little laugh!

Nancy

Nice additions, Nancy! Hmm, I never thought that Martha would have posed in the nude, but... well, why not.

I thought Zared was a little less than truthful when he told Martha that Jenni wanted to marry him, however. I got the impression that she thought it was too soon.

Anyway, good to see that conversation between Martha and Zared.

Ann

I'm not great at remembering the episode names, but remember the one where Jonathan left Martha and moved in with Clark? He did that because Martha had posed nude and he thought she was having an affair. He showed the painting to Clark. Clark's comment with raised eyebrows was, "Mom?!"