Thanks for reading everyone, 'creepy' was the intention, so I'm very glad it worked. It's actually the first horror story I've written although I've always wanted to write one--just couldn't get past "It was a dark and stormy night"
. I definitely would not have posted this if it hadn't been Halloween. I already knew that just by typing "violence/gore" I'd be limiting my audience. Thanks to DSDragon, Lisa, LaraMoon, Olympe, Sue and DJ for commenting.
I suppose it would be helpful if I had seen either of these [movies], because I am still not exactly sure what happened.
Hey there Lisa/DSDragon--the film Carrie (if I'm spelling it correctly) has a wildly spoofed scene where a hand appears from beneath the ground and grabs that of the person who was dropping off flowers at the headstone. Dawn of the Dead is about zombies. Seeing either/both is not really necessary to understand the story (which can either be nothing happened la-di-da or something did happen-boo), but I find it fun to point out who I'm indebted (/ripping off
) to through the characters. That was the only intention behind that line.
Sue,
And an ambiguous ending to boot!
When I first wrote it, up until the last minute, I thought about not going with the cheesy Halloween fake-out. Then I thought that this was so far out there, it merited ending on a Halloween-ish tone, so I left it. Otherwise I think the creepiness is dulled a bit.
Olympe,
<Shudder> Good one. Forgive me for not wanting to read it again, but... <shudder>
No forgiveness necessary:). I know this isn't everyone's cup of tea, I'm just happy you gave it a chance.
LaraMoon,
Loved it! Well done and deliciously creepy. Perfect for halloween!
Glad you enjoyed it.
DJ,
Thanks for reading--I'm happy it worked for you.
Yes, where is this longer story Sue keeps mentioning?
Sitting at the kitchen table having tea while pointing and laughing at me.
Or at least, that's what it feels like.
*sigh* It's somewhat close to being finished, but then there's massive clean-up editing for me to do before I'm comfortable (is there such a thing?) with posting. But so help me after all the work I've put into it (and all the rough drafts I've made Sue go through), there is no way that monster isn't going to be posted for better or worse.
By. The. Way. Where is that angsty New Misgivings? *poke*
Either way, thanks again for reading and commenting, everyone!
Um, having tea with yours? Mine's got a big chunk in the middle that's missing - well, not missing, just not fleshed out. And the ending's only in my head. 
right back atcha!