He was counting so much on the success of this surgery... but how would he react if there was no improvement? Strangely, it registered that the recovery of his memory meant less to her than it did to him, yet she found herself praying that he wouldn't have to experience more disappointment. But if the worst did happen, then Lois vowed she would spend the rest of her life creating new, wonderful memories for Clark. As long as they were together, they could face any problem.
Yes, it is
Clark who wants the surgery, not Lois, because as far as she is concerned, she has already gotten her husband back. In all ways that count, he is the same man that she lost so many years ago. But Clark isn't back to himself, and while he knows that he loves Lois and his children, he doesn't remember them.
In this paragraph, Lois is thinking to herself that if the
worst came to happen, then Lois would make sure that she created new, wonderful memories for Clark. That's a lovely thought. But the possibility that Clark won't get his memories back is really not the worst that could happen:
They were standing close together by his side, Lois' free hand firmly locked in Matt's, while the other cupped Clark's face, stroking his cheek. In the week since his return, the gesture had grown very familiar and safe... and for an infinitesimal moment, he suddenly dreaded that he would never experience Lois' touch again.
Terror slithered through him, tightening his throat. Perhaps he'd been wrong to insist on this surgery, or at least, immediately. How could he bear to lose them so soon, or inflict such a loss on his family again?
Yes, in a way it is selfish of him to insist on having surgery. Because, frankly, the worst that could happen is that the surgery might kill him, or finish the job of changing his personality, so that he is no longer Clark.
But Lois has accepted the surgery and she believes in him, and in the two of them:
"Sweetheart, you'll be back with us in a few hours. You'll see! Bernie and the others will take good care of you."
Had Lois read his mind? He'd been surprised by how often they'd been able to sense each others' thoughts. Was that another of the powers he'd lost? Maybe that was something he could investigate when he recovered? A strange calm settled over Clark and he knew, without a shadow of a doubt, that he would survive. Lois had loaned him her strength once again and he wouldn't disappoint her.
This is very beautiful. Interesting: if Clark
does die, he will have gone to his death hopeful and happy, thinking he would come out of his surgery a whole and healed man. It would be Lois and his family who would have to deal with his loss. But I don't think you are going to do this to us, Jenni.
"Of course I will, Lois. This is just the beginning...." he said, the medication slurring his words a little.
"Not the beginning, Clark. Our life together never ended. This is just the continuation of the...."
"Rest of our lives together." Clark finished her thought, and Lois bent over him and placed a lingering kiss on his lips.
He didn't need to die to go to heaven. Clark had heaven here on Earth.
This is so beautiful, particularly the last sentence.
"Bye, Lois," Clark whispered, already feeling very sleepy. "Bye Matt. Take care of your mother and sisters...."
With surprising sprightliness, Bernie squeezed himself into a corner of the car. He would be inside the OR in a supervisory position and he took his promise to watch over Clark very seriously.
"Sleep well, my love. I'll see you soon...." Lois called through the closing doors, then, losing the will to be resolute, she slumped sidewards against Matt, her head coming to rest on his shoulder.
Of course, this sounds a little more ominous... but I do think it will be all right.
I, too, loved the scenes with the wedding ring. Like Lisa said, both the scene with Adrienne and Lois and the one with Lois and Clark were so beautiful.
And now we are all impatiently waiting for Clark to wake up from surgery.
Ann
Are we going to see together the Kent family and the MacDonnell together?
