Lois & Clark Forums Forums Fan Fiction Lois & Clark Fanfic A Christmas idea.... (or in other words: A Round Robin)

"As long as Tank leaves my hair alone, then that's okay. No more bad haircuts! And by the way, when Clark said, 'I do', he said it before that veil appeared over Alexa's head. He married me... not you." She turned to Tempus and laughed wickedly. "Oh, god, I love the irony... And you elves just need to stop pretending to be smiley faces. I know who you are."

"Perry, Jimmy, Ralph, Martha, Jonathan, Lucy - just turn back into yourselves!"

She heard a 'poof', and the people in front of her weren't elves any more. But they were oddly dressed. And didn't even remotely look like her the people she expected. With a start she realized she was standing in front of the whole JLA. A very amused JLA.

Even the Batman was grinning at her. "Batman does grin?" Lois wondered.

With a VERY big SMILE Batman says:

Dear Mrs Santa Claus , also known as Mrs Clark Kent, also known as Mrs Superman,,, Keep shtum Lois don't protest...

We your friends are here to help you.


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Seasons Greetings One and All!

"Do I want to know with what you're going to help me?" Lois wasn't sure she did.

"Of course you do. You wouldn't be *the* Lois Lane if you didn't," Batman answered her.

"So, what is it?" Lois asked.

The Martian Manhunter replied, "Why were going to help get ready for Christmas."

"You know... All those gifts," added the Green Lantern.

Ice smiled and made snow instead of ice. "And I'm gonna give everyone a White Christmas."

"So, what will I be doing?" Wonderwoman asked.

"You'll be the beautiful elven maid accompanying Santa," Batman explained.

"May I sit by her side? Please?" Blue Beetle begged.

"No, you may not," Ice decided. "Unless you want to suffer from frostbite in a very tender area..."

Booster Gold smirked. "Quit joking around Ice. We've got real work to do. We don't have time to put up with your petty jealousies."

Guy Gardner frowned and muttered, "Yeah, yeah, yeah... It's always somethin', ain't it? Bah, humbug. I'm gettin' outta here."

"Well, that takes care of that Rambo with a ring," said the real Green Lantern.

"So, what do we do now?" asked Booster Gold.

"We'd better help Superman with whatever he is doing," Batman answered. He looked at the Martian Manhunter in inquiry.

Martian Manhunter contacted Superman telepathically before saying, "He's clearing the site of an earthquake sout of here."

"Which south? On the norht pole, every direction is south!" Blue Beetle asked.

Lois stamped her foot. "Oh, for Pete's sake." She pointed. "It's that way. Yes, yes, please get out of here. You are interrupting Santa Lois' work. Now go!"

"Slow pokes," Flash whispered under his breath, tapping his foot. "If it had been me, the presents would already have been delivered!"

"Get going!" Lois shouted at the assembled superheroes. As soon as they were gone, she turned to Mrs. Claus the elder and said, "Now you can do your magic thing to get things done."

"What do you think who I am? Your fairie godmother?"

"What?" Lois was definitely skeptical. "You mean you don't have magic powers to help get Christmas finished?"

Mrs. Claus gave her a strange look. "Have you ever even heard the story of Santa Claus?"

"Yeah . . ."

"Was there any mention of Mrs. Claus doing anything except marrying Santa Claus?"

Lois thought a moment, then said with a small scowl, "Point taken."

Lois stood there looking totally perplexed. But she was a take charge kind of woman, so she told Doc, the head elf, to go find the reindeer. Rudolph came wandering through and she welcomed him back. She assigned him to go find the 'real' Santa Claus. She knew Santa would listen to Rudolph. Now who could she ask to find the sleigh? She thought, 'Ah, I know....'

She grabbed Flash by the collar and ordered him to "run and get the sleigh" - for one thing it would keep him from complaining. And for another, he'd have it here in a... well... a flash!

So off went Flash, glad for once that Superman wasn't around to tell everyone he could get the job done faster than the scarlet speedster could. As usual.

And what a sight Flash made pulling the sleigh. Along the way, he grabbed a wreath and put it around his neck. Red and green together. He was totally decked out for Christmas. Now all he needed were some of those antlers that you clipped to your head.

"I need a warmer coat and a map" Lois told Mrs. Claus as she climbed into the sleigh. On cue, an elf produced both. She tucked the map into a pocket and grabbed the reigns.

"But you can't..."

"Watch me!" Lois snapped. "Look, I may not have magic, but your husband's AWOL, mine's saving people from an earthquake, and the kids are waiting. Flash? You deliver; I'll drive. Giddy-up!"

"Clark, you owe me…" Lois muttered..

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Bless the contraction....it made it possible to meet the word count limit!
Yes, I'm assuming the reindeer have been found and hitched up. Cope!

The real Santa, though feeling stressed, had been keeping an eye on things. He really hadn't gone very far away. When he realized just what a mess of things Santa Lois and the Flash were making of things he decided to return. Didn't they know that reindeer had to pull the sled? The earthquake was over and no one had died. So where was Clark Kent / Superman. He'd better get back here pronto.
Kris Kringle roared, "Lois Lane!!"

"You can't deliver the presents. The children will expect a Santa Claus, not a Santa Nicola!"

In her no nonsense style, Lois said, "Fine. You do it. It's your job anyway."

Clark touched down and smiled. "Santa! You're back!" He touched his face. "The beard's gone! I tell you that caused no small amount of consternation among the people I was rescuing."

Lois stepped out of the sleigh and flew into his arms. "Take me home, Clark."

As Clark caught her, he realized that 'home' probably just meant her own apartment.

He took a deep breath and, being the really nice guy he was, offered her a way out of this whole marriage thing.

"Lois," he said, uneasily. "Uh... I don't have to be Santa anymore. So... um... you know? If you want an annulment..."